"Wh…what? What do you mean? Why are you asking me for this?" Izarre stammered as he stood up from the bed and walked away from the shattered cup on the floor. There was anger to his voice; rage mixed with sadness and betrayal.
"The child will bear the taint," Morrigan tried to explain amongst the yelling. "And when the Archdemon is slain, its essence will seek the child like a beacon." With his temper cooled, the Warden slowly began to stop shaking only because what he was being told actually made sense. If nothing else, Morrigan knew how clever and susceptible to logic her friend was which was why she felt no need to be angry at him for questioning her motives. "At this early stage, the child can absorb that essence and not perish. The Archdemon is still destroyed, with no Grey Warden dying in the process."
"But…why me?" Izarre still felt the urge to ask even though he already partially knew the answer. Unlike most others in the group, Morrigan had grown to care for him after all. Despite her seemingly dismissive attitude and icy demeanor, she was actually quite taken with him, even if not on a romantic level.
"Think about what I offer you; the chance to avoid death. Or better yet, the chance to slay the Archdemon and live as a hero. No Grey Warden has ever done this."
"I have no interest in being a hero. You should know that about me if nothing else."
"Then a chance to live then and a chance for Alistair to live beside you. In return, I will conceive a child, one who will be born with the soul of an Old God…and you allow me to walk away and you do not follow. Ever. The child will be mine to raise as I wish."
"So why me? Really? Why not Riordan, a senior member with a stronger taint in his blood?" Morrigan shook her head at the suggestion.
"Even if I thought Riordan could be convinced, he is unsuitable. I need one who has not been tainted for long. It must be you and it must be tonight. The only other alternative is…well…You know of whom I speak." Sinking a bit as he stood, Izarre knew exactly who the other choice was.
"Alistair…The only other option is Alistair." To this, Morrigan nodded as Izarre covered his eyes to slow down a second wave of tears.
"If you do not wish to take me, I understand, but if you care for your lover at all, it must be you…or you must convenience him to take your place instead. I do not pretend to understand why you are so hesitant, but those are your only options. You know as well as I do that he puts you on a pedestal and that if there was any inkling of you being endangered, he will strike the final blow himself rather than risk losing you. I also know that you would do the same for him." Pacing a bit where he stood, Izarre eventually moved to towards the door.
"Wait here. Please…I have… much to discuss, but will return shortly."
"A wise decision," Morrigan sighed. "I shall wait here while you go and speak to your King. I urge you to be convincing it whichever you choose."
With that, Izarre left and made sure his face was clean from tears before returning to his shared bedroom. Alistair had already undressed and sat upon the edge of the bed with his head down in deep thought. He didn't look up, even though he clearly heard the door open and shut. He knew exactly who it was. "Thank you for coming back," was all he said before standing to face the wall rather than his torn lover. "I…wanted to stay awake for you and apo…logize?" His tone softened as he felt an embrace from behind. After turning around, his hands were taken to be held.
"Alistair," Izarre began. "I am…truly sorry for my behavior."
"That's a bit formal, isn't it?" Alistair asked with a forgiving smile. "Listen, I know how upset you were at the news. I might just be too surprised to be nearly as worried as you are, but then again, I'm not very smart either, so let's just go to sleep and…" As Alistair moved to tug his worry-wart of a fiancée into the bed, he was surprised at Izarre's resistance and pulling away.
"Actually, wait. We need to talk. I saw Morrigan in the hallway and…we had a discussion."
"This is what I get for becoming king. Everyone always brings you the bad news," the fresh royal laughed. "So what is it, then?" Rats running amok? Cheese supplies run low? I can take it."
"…Rats and cheese? What are you…?" Exasperated, Izarre only sighed and tried to dismiss the terrible joke. "…You know that I love you, right?"
"…Could you make it sound more ominous? Tell me, already." Letting go of Alistair's hands, the nervous Warden backed away to pace a bit as he spoke.
"It wasn't as if I was looking for her for this, but I confided in Morrigan about our troubles; specifically the part about how we could be faced with the Archdemon before Riordan and how killing it means that one of us could perish in the process."
"Ah." A lump caught in Alistair's throat as he watched Izarre walk back and forth, something he knew his lover only did when he had troubling things on his mind.
"And please don't say how we can figure it out later because we might not have a later. Look at me, Alistair. I've lost my family and you've lost yours, but I'm a nobody. I am the adopted son of a slaughtered noble house that doesn't even share the bloodline. If you really want to be specific, I'm basically a maleficar and will likely be branded as the social climbing whore who seduced a naive king if we fail. No one will mourn my passing and more importantly, I simply won't allow you to die for me. You know me, Alistair. If it were up to just the two of us to kill the Archdemon, you couldn't stop me even if you wanted to! But, let's say that you beat the odds and actually managed to do so, what makes you think that I want to be in this world without you? You're the only one I've ever had these feelings for and I…"
The lengthy tearful confession was a side of Izzare which Alistair had never seen before. The strongest willed person outside of Duncan he had ever known, whom had lifted him up and carried him all this way from a thrown away illegitimate son to being the king of Ferelden, was now falling to pieces right before his eyes. "Izzy," he frowned as he reached out to comfort his distraught love, but the other Warden backed away.
"No…No. I'm not done yet," Izarre protested as he put a hand up to stop Alistair from embracing him. "We can avoid death tomorrow. All of us. We do not have to die with the Archdemon."
"If you mean running away, I can't do that," Alistair scoffed, amused at the thought, but something didn't seem right. "But…you don't mean that, do you? What is this about? You're not making any sense."
"There's a magic ritual which could protect us…but I need to your help."
"Oh?" Cocking an eyebrow, the King was at least curious. Izarre wasn't the type to throw magic at every problem after all. "Something Morrigan cooked up, no doubt. What do you need me to do then? I'm not a mage and you barely qualify as one to begin with."
"…I…" There was a pause as if Izarre had to force the rest of the sentence out of his strained throat. "I need to you sleep with her." Of course, Alistair laughed again.
"Ha! Cute! This is payback, right? For all the jokes?" However the laughter slowly came to a halt as the hurt pair of green eyes continued to stare at the floor and the lump in Alistair's throat dropped to his stomach as if it were a boulder. "But…you're not joking. You're…actually serious. But…what? Why? Why would you ask me to do something like that?" Cringing at the anger being hurled in his direction, Izarre visibly shrank away in both guilt and shame. "You're not actually asking me this, are you? What sort of ritual is this, anyway? Izzy? Izarre! Answer me."
"…It's blood magic," the younger Warden weakly replied. "Not what we saw in the Circle, but something else. You will need to sleep with her so she can have your child and…"
"WHAT?!" Again, Izarre flinched as Alistair ranted in his direction. "I…I must be hearing things! Are you telling me to impregnate Morrigan in some kind of…magical…sex rite?! Maker, why?" Pinching the bridge of his nose, the King had to take several breaths to calm down. "Suppose, I believe you for a moment. This child…Why would Morrigan want such a thing? Does she want an heir to the throne?" At least Izarre could shake his head at that.
"No, it's not about…well. On her end, it's not about having an heir; otherwise she wouldn't have asked me to do it first."
"…So, not only are you saying that she wants me to impregnate her, she actually wants you to do it and I'm a what? Substitute? Runner-up? Did you flip a coin? Draw lots?" Taking a step forward, he reached out to grab Izarre's wrist so the younger man would stop walking away from him. "You need to explain this to me. Now." After releasing a held in breath, Izarre finally calmed down enough to tell Alistair everything he knew more clearly in regards to the taint in their blood and what the pregnancy would create; a human born with an uncorrupted soul of an Old God.
"She will take the child to raise on her own. If you're concerned about an heir, she doesn't seem to be interested in such things," he added at the end and hoped that would be enough for Alistair to finally agree.
"Fine." Even after letting go of the scrawny wrists he had taken captive, Alistair still remained within reach. "However, you and I both know that you're just dancing around the one question I really want an answer to."
"Ah…"
"Do not take me for a fool, Izzy. I know you've been with women before you met me. Men as well, I imagine. You were asked first, yet you're asking me to sleep with her instead? Why? It doesn't make any sense. " Taking his beloved by the hands, Izarre squeezed them affectionately as he answered.
"It's because of you, Alistair. It's because of us. Yes, I've been with men and women alike before you, but I also know that one day, you'll have to leave me behind to make love to a woman for the sake of your throne in an attempt to have an heir. Even if nothing comes from it, it will be demanded of you. My father once said to me that a true ruler is actually a servant to the people and I know that I am capable of not letting that ruin us." Looking up, the sad green eyes caught the attention of the concerned hazel ones. "But you…"
"But me?"
"You…would not, could not forgive me if I shared my bed with someone else no matter what any sort of duty demanded me to. Don't say that you could because that would be a lie. You hate how you were born out of wedlock, and how Cailan's arrogance allowed Anora to manipulate that carelessness to be the death of him. We may not be married yet, but at least be honest with me. If I slept with Morrigan, would you really not look at me as spoiled every day for the rest of our lives? I cannot live with that."
"But, if you had no choice…"
"It wouldn't matter and I love that part of you. You accept me as who I am, but you know only of me and my touch." A hand came to stroke the King's cheek, a feeling that was leaned into. " I may not have been as pure as the driven snow when you met me, but I will never hurt you in that way…Even if my life depends on it…and…well…it actually does. But for me, I wasn't sheltered and I can live with you giving yourself to someone else for the sake of the kingdom. You…may feel guilty about it, but I will never be ashamed of you for doing something so selfless. Everything you do fills me with such pride, even if you don't see it for yourself. I know what I ask of you may sound stupid and selfish…but part of me needs to break you eventually."
"Break me?" Alistair asked a bit confused. "Break me of what?" Of you?"
"In a way, yes. There will be things demanded of you in the days to come that will require you to be someone that you are not. You are already cracking from your shell just by becoming king. This is like a test for us. Can we survive this? Can we get past something as trivial as you spilling your seed in a woman to produce an heir? No one needs me to do that or will ever really, so I wish to remain completely yours and yours alone." Leaning down and closing his eyes, Alistair gently nuzzled his forehead into the white hair.
"Actually, it's a bit crazy, but I understand… A part of me is grateful how you are and how you came to me as you did instead of easily agreeing to Morrigan's plan without my knowledge. Words cannot express how lucky I am to have someone who loves me enough to even confess something so…painful…So," he paused to clear his throat. "Is she still in her room then? We should…go speak to her if we're actually going to do this before I...change my mind." Though Izarre looked rather surprised as his lover's choice, he quickly nodded returned to Morrigan.
When they arrived, the woman was standing by the lit fireplace patiently waiting. "I would seem your talk is done?" she asked as the two Warden's entered. "Has a decision been reached?"
"It has, but first I want to ask about this…child," Alistair grumbled a bit. "The one you…want."
"Interesting," Morrigan hummed. "Honesty wouldn't have been my first choice…"
"I just want to be sure that you're not going to use this…against Ferelden. That this bastard child isn't going to show up some year…"
"Of that, you have my word," she smiled and beckoned Alistair over. "Let us go somewhere more private. You will not hate this quite so much as you believe."
"Wait a moment." Rejecting her advances, Alistair crossed his arms to hold his ground much to Izarre's surprise. "You said it didn't matter which one of us…ah… fulfilled your needs, correct? That it could be either one of us?" Intrigued, the woman nodded. "So…in that case…it will be the both of us."
"Pardon? The both of you?" With raised eyebrows, Morrigan questioned the statement with a small chuckle. Turning to fiancée, Alistair took hold of both of the smaller man's shoulders.
"Listen, if we are going to do something we may both come to regret, then we shall be shamed together or not at all. I will not leave you here to suffer as I do things in another room just as you would not let me watch you walk away to do the same. We will both play this selfish role as one." Confused but helpless to refuse, Izarre could only look at Morrigan briefly before turning back to Alistair. After confirming his willingness with a silent nod, he was kissed passionately before being pulled under a strong arm without any hope of escaping. "You like a good challenge, don't you Morrigan?" Alistair forced a grin. "I'm sure you can handle two handsome fellows such as us, right?" With a causal shrug, she moved behind them to lock the door.
"I've been on worse adventures." Taking a hand from each of the Wardens, she pulled them to the bed. "Well go on, get started then. I'll join after having taken my fill of the show."