Gibbs

Sitting there against the helicopter wall with the jacket spread open against his body, Jethro just sat there staring at the injured agent laying before him. He didn't think of the boy as an agent, he didn't think of the boy as a friend. No, he thought of him as his own child laying there, dying. The gun shot wounds. the injuries seen and unseen. He felt nothing right now, except for the gnawing feeling deep down inside. Guilt, why should he feel it? Because it was his duty to protect his team, to protect his family. Yet he had failed McGee in some way. There was nothing he could have done, but in his mind there was so very much he could have done. He should have pushed Vance harder, should have made Abby and the other computer techs work faster on finding a connection. He should have been there sooner to the location McGee was being held and he should have been the one laying there on that board dying. There was no changing his mind, ever, he would always, always feel the guilt when anyone close to him was hurt.

Severely hurt, but clearly not as bad as McGee was, Jethro refused any help right now despite the pleas from the other medics in the helicopter. His chest no longer bled, the cold from his body had slowed it down. His leg seeped but no longer spurted blood. His mouth had a trickle of blood dripping from the corner of his lips every so often, yet he didn't taste it yet. His eye were glued to that helpless man laying there before him.

The sound of a flat line rang through Jethro's ears.

Zap

He never flinched as the body in front of him jolted with each volt passing through it. All he could hear was that flat line. Over and over again in his head. Even when that little blip started to beep on the screen he heard the flat line. Now off in his own state of mind, Jethro's eyes never blink. His faded gray blue hues just stare at the boy. He looked so helpless, so innocent right now. Just laying there fighting for his life. Jethro had seen so much death, so much pain over the years and this was only adding to it even more. To just sit there and watch unable to do anything at all was worse than ever.

Standing on the roof tops with Tony and Kate, Jethro glances around. Something didn't feel right, something deep down in the pit of his gut screamed there was something wrong. Bang Jethro pulls his gun out and scans around before feeling something warm against his face. Lowering his gun he looks over to Kate and as if in slow motion her eyes lose their life and she crumples to the ground. He looks down at her, a small bit of blood on his cheek. She was gone, taken from him.

Like a spinning wild wheel of fortune, Jethro's starts to see his pain flash before him.

The warm heat, the sun the sand against his skin, warms him through the bone yet he felt a shiver run down his spine. Glancing over at Lt. Cameron, Jethro gives a nod of his head with a smirk.

"So, Gunny, what are you going to get that pretty little girl of yours for your anniversary."

"I don't know Cameron, it's not like I'll be there with her."

"Nahh come on Gunny, don't think like that. You are there with her. You really are. Come on tell me, you have to have some idea."

"I was thinking flowers and ..."

"Flowers? Are you kidding me? Alicia told me Shannon and she were talking...now I'm not supposed to tell you this but she said Shannon told her she had her eye on one of those new fancy dish washers."

"A dishwasher?"

"Yeah, you know that thing you put dishes in and it washes all on it's own."

"Ha, ha very funny. You know I hate you right?"

"Oh yes I..."

"ENEMY FIRE TAKE COVER."

Before either man could hear the warning all hell broke loose. Gun fire came from everywhere. Jethro and Cameron fire their weapons back at the unknown. Just as Jethro was about to be hit by a sniper rifle, Cameron jumps in the way pulling him down. Warmth, Jethro could still feel the warmth against his hands. "Cameron..."

No answers from his friend just an odd gurgling sound. Crawling off to the side, Jethro pulls Cameron with him, holding the man in his arms, his hand against the stomach wound. "Stay with me, stay with me Cameron."

Cameron's eyes glaze over and he looks up at Jethro. So pale, so white. "I don't understand Gunny, I don't understand..."

The man says no more and dies in Jethro's arms. "Not for me...not for me.."

The jolt of the helicopter touching down tears Jethro from his grim thoughts again. His eyes finally blink looking at the boy being unloaded from the plane first. So life less, so pale. He could practically feel the life draining from him. No comforting words could be said, no comforting thoughts could be thought. Jethro watches as the boy is wheeled off. A nurse and two other male orderlies climb up into the helicopter seeing the state Jethro was in.

"Sir...sir can you hear me?" The woman asks him gently, Jethro was now looking down at his hands covered in blood, McGee's blood, the men he had killed's blood and his own.

"Sir? ...I think he is in shock, Matt get a gurney.."

"No..." Finally he speaks in a gruff voice. "The name is Gibbs, not sir and I don't need a damn gurney." He growls at the woman slowly trying to get to his feet. His leg fails him, holding back stiffly against him not allowing any movement. He hisses in pain and glares at his leg. His body shook and shivered, freezing cold to the touch. Hypothermia setting in. No more pain came from his chest, he felt the pressure against his lungs, but no pain. Just cold, searing numbness.

"Please, Gibbs, just let us help you. Let us get you inside.." The woman please to him with a soft caring voice. For a second, a split second Jethro looks at the woman and he sees someone he hadn't seen in many, many years; Shannon. The fiery red hair, those soft eyes and beautiful smile. "Shannon?"

The woman still stares back at him, voice as soft as angels. "No, my name is Gloria, Gibbs, Gibbs...try and listen to me.."

Jethro tries again to get up but the cold, the injuries and the loss of blood takes hold of him and he passes out with the image of Shannon fresh in his mind, to haunt him, plague him in the quite freezing darkness.

As the hour passed, Jethro was stabilized and sent to the O.R. First, they had the task of getting his body temperature back up in order to operate. His limbs were turning a light blue color along with his lips. Covered in heating packs the nurses watch him non stop, unable to be left alone. The more his body temperature started to rise the more his wounds started to bleed again. His mind had him locked right now in a hallucinated state of confusion, pain and injury. The woman nurse was still with him, his brain convinced it was Shannon.

"Shannon.." He finally speaks emerging from his unconsciousness only to feel a sharp searing pain in his leg and chest before it spread through his entire body. His muscles painfully thawing out revealing every injury to even himself. He groans in pain before his eyes adjust and sees that it was not Shannon there with him. He focused now, looking around himself fighting with his body to get up. "Timothy..."

"Easy Gibbs, relax, just stay calm. Timothy is in good hands right now." Gloria gently pushes him back down careful of the knife still protruding from his chest. The doctor walks in with X-rays in hand glancing to Jethro before the nurse and then moving to look at the X-ray. Jethro's eyes follow the man, now not struggling for the pain was far to great, but he holds it back, keeps himself quite. He wanted to scream and holler, cry and just let go, but that Marine in him made it stay at bay.

He looked to the X-ray seeing his own scans. Seeing the blade deep into his chest cavity pressing against his heart and spine. He could see the other pictures of his ribs, cracked. His lung collapsed and the head scan and how much darkness surrounded the left side of his skull. He had seen enough with Ducky to know what this all meant. The test were all done while he was out, while they were stabilizing him and bandaging him up for pre op. Now, it was time for the doctors to see if they could repair all the damages.

"Gibbs, the doctor is going to have you put under now. Just breath in slowly, count back from ten."

His near lifeless eyes look up at the woman before darkness consumes him again.