Hi. So thanks for all of the new and old follows and faves. it's a great feeling to know that people are keeping up with this story. And for all of the reviews thanks for you verbal feed back on this story. I love reading them, so keep em coming!
So wow 25 chapters in. Huh. Well this one is a short one but it has some meat to it. Its named after part of one of my favorite Adele songs. Finish the lyrics and you'll kind of understand why I named it this.
So as I always ask all of my readers, please:
Read, Enjoy, and Review
Chapter 25: I best tidy up my head…
"You have one new message" beep
"Hey 'Cedes, I just made it back home… funny I call this home now. Anyway, I have to say we missed you on the fourth. My mom wants to know when you'll be back to visit. Stacy made me promise to tell you that her outfit was amazing, and I got to meet Jenna. Stevie is such a gonner. But I know how that is. So anyway, I wanted to know, if you wanted to meet up with me for drinks? There is some important things I wanted to talk to you about and I… I can't say it over the phone. So call me back when you get this. This is Sam by the way."
Mercedes pressed the delete button on her phone and tossed it back on her couch cushion. She picked up her remote and turned it back up as Adele filtered through her speakers. She looked out of her window to the sky line and sighed as she took another drink of her Kahlua. She glanced over at the hand sketched artwork Sam had given her and rolled her eyes, as it leaned on the floor against the wall, begging to be hung. She stood up promptly after staring at it for a moment, and yanked it off of the floor. She quickly located her coat closet and tossed it in the windowless room, slamming the door behind her. She leaned against the door, pressing her whole body against it as if prevent a monster from leaving it's confines. "Pull it together Jones" she said to herself as she reclaimed her place on her couch, taking a large swig of her drink.
"You have one new message"
"Hey so the funniest thing just happened. I was sitting at my drafting table working on some new sketches. Anyway, Finn bust through my door, all excited and says "Hey I get it! She told you about how freakishly big your mouth is, but her thighs where covering your ears! Ha! That's so funny!" At first I didn't know what he was talking about but then I remembered from the first day I met the group. Can you believe that? I mean how long ago was that? Anyway I called you a few days ago, and you never returned my call. In fact you never called me to let me know you made it home safely. I mean if you're not bound and gagged somewhere can you call and let me know you're not? Anyway, call me… I really need to talk about something really important. So call me when you get time. Please? This is Sam. Bye."
Mercedes pressed the delete button on her phone voice mail and sighed as she leaned back in her chair. She shook her head and chuckled lightly to herself. After letting off a deep breath, she returned to what she was doing, as she taped more pictures to her image board for Sam's looming party. As she organized the color pallet she huffed, not impressed by Sam's persistence, but if she were honest, it was a funny story.
"So Kurt came over yesterday, and said you had lunch with him and Tina the other day. Well I was glad to hear you were safe and everything. But I still don't understand why I haven't heard a peep from you since you left Memphis. And they said you seemed fine, but you canceled on practice the other day. So what's going on? I'm not a total narcissist but I can't help but think, are you avoiding me? Did I do something? Mercedes if I did, I would really like to know what it was? Call me when you get this. I-I miss… I miss talking to you. I- I miss you. This is Sam"
Mercedes grit her teeth as she deleted Sam's message. She picked up the sheet music she was going over before she got the phone call that she ultimately ignored. She had gotten the go ahead from Santana and didn't want anything to possibly effect what she was determined to do. He would hear from her soon enough, but she had to prepare herself before that time.
Sam sat at the mixing board of the practice space, a ball of nervous energy. He hadn't seen Mercedes in what felt like months, however it had only been about a week and a half since he had heard her voice. He had to settle on hearing how she was from the others in the group who she had found the time to hang out with. He had been calling her, frantically, but a small part of him was relieved that he hadn't spoken to her, considering he had yet to know exactly how he was going to convey his feelings. He tried to write it all down, but it came out a disjointed, and vague mess. So he decided instead to allow his feelings guide him, knowing that the words would come once he saw her, that is if he ever saw her. He had become frustrated with her obvious dodging of him. He couldn't understand why she was, but he was determined to find out why. He bit the side of his thumb nail, his knee bounced absent mindedly while the rest of the group buzzed around him, talking and laughing, as they rested between songs.
"Hey Mamma" he heard Puck exclaim. He turned around to see her walk into the studio, with a bright smile on her face as she gazed around the room greeting everyone. Her hair down in soft curls and her skin with a soft sun kissed glow. She looked breath taking, and he forgotten just how she effected a room when she entered it.
"Took you long enough" Santana huffed. "I know you called but dang Wheezy I didn't know you would be this late"
"Good" Artie smiled turning around to face her as she walked farther into the studio. "You're finally here. Now you and Sam can go over Syrup and Honey"
That's when their eyes finally met, and Sam couldn't help but notice that her eyes lost its warm glow, only to replaced with an ice cold glare. "Oh yeah" she huffed as she eyed him briefly before addressing Artie. "I don't want to do that song anymore"
"What?" Artie questioned as rolled closer to her.
"Yeah" Sam agreed shocked from being broad sided with her refusal to perform with him.
"Yeah well it slows down the whole show" Mercedes explained nonchalantly as she put her bag down and headed to the performance area. "I don't think we need to put the set to sleep. So I've picked a different song. Here" she said shoving a CD into Artie's hands "After clearing it with San"
"And" Santana interrupted "You promised to clear all of my IOUs"
"Actually I said I'd forgive half of your IOUs. And with all the IOUs you owe me I still have enough to own your ass well into our mid-lives" Mercedes corrected before walking into the recording area.
"But you guys heard that though right?" Santana confirmed with the rest of the group. "She said they're gone right?'
Artie rolled his eyes as he put on the instrumental music. Mercedes bopped a bit to the melody as she slapped her thigh to the rhythm. She took a deep breath opened her eyes and began to sing:
All I can ever be to you is a darkness that we know
And this regret I got accustomed to
Once it was so right when we were at our high
Waiting for you in the hotel at night
I knew I hadn't met my match but every moment we could snatch
I don't know why I got so attached
It's my responsibility and you don't owe nothing to me
But to walk away, I have no capacity
He walks away,
the sun goes down
He takes the day but I'm grown
And in your way in this blue shade
My tears dry on their own
I don't understand, why do I stress the man
When there's so many better things at hand
We could a never had it all,
we had to hit a wall So this is inevitable withdrawal
Even if I stop wanting you, a perspective pushes through
I'll be some next man's other woman soon
I cannot play myself again,
I should just be my own best friend
Not fuck myself in the head with stupid men
He walks away, the sun goes down
He takes the day but I'm grown
And in your way in this blue shade
My tears dry on their own
So we are history, your shadow covers me
The sky above, a blaze
He walks away, the sun goes down
He takes the day but I'm grown
And in your way in this blue shade
My tears dry on their own
I wish I could sing no regrets and no emotional debts
'Cause as we kiss goodbye the sun sets
So we are history, the shadow covers me
The sky above, a blaze that only lovers see
He walks away, the sun goes down
He takes the day but I'm grown
And in your way my blue shade
My tears dry on their own
He walks away, the sun goes down
He takes the day but I am grown
And in your way my deep shade
My tears dry on their own
He walks away, the sun goes down
He takes the day but I'm grown
And in your way my deep shade
My tears dry!
Sam's spine snapped as she hit that last note. The entire time she sang the rest of the group members sang and bounced around him as she sang her heart out. But what they didn't notice was the fact that as each syllable left her round softly glossed lips, her eyes bore straight into him. And although she sang with a flawless tone and pitch, it was also full of anger, pain, that scared him a bit.
For the rest of the practice, Mercedes avoided Sam's gaze, while he counted down the minutes to get her alone to ask her the many questions that raced through his mind. After playing guitar behind Santana and Tina's duet of "My Same" by Adele, the last song of the day, he looked up to see Mercedes walking out of the door as she left a few minutes before practice was officially done. He quickly put down his instrument and raced out to follow her out into the hall to find she had already made it onto the elevator and was headed down. Sam quickly located the emergency exit and took the steps down by two to the first floor. He made it just as he saw her walking out of the door of the building. Almost totally out of breath, he ran out of the door, following her.
Mercedes took a deep breath happy she had made it into her truck without having to talk directly to Sam. She had allowed her song choice do all of the talking and explaining that needed. She was just about to put her keys into the ignition when her passenger side door flew open, Sam hopping in side slamming it behind him.
"God Sam!" She exclaimed, half scared that he was a possible attacker and half upset she hadn't been able to shake him when she managed to make it to the elevator, what she thought undetected.
"What is up with you?!" he questioned, the first words he had been able to speak to her since he watched her ride away to the airport that night in Memphis.
"Nothing, just get out" Mercedes huffed, wishing she could make him disappear.
"No" he refused fed up with being in the dark as to why none of his numerous phone calls had gone answered. "Now I have been calling you and trying to talk to you but you have been avoiding me. The thing is I have no clue as to why you aren't talking to me! I mean I thought we were friends, and you just run out on dinner, with my family" he explained, becoming peeved at the final part. "With no explanation why"
"Oh I don't know Sam" Mercedes said sarcastically, angry that he had the nerve to question why she left. "You know maybe one of my many family issues called me away. You know my daddy issues. Oh or was it my mother. You know I have so many, I get them mixed up"
"What?" Sam questioned not understanding.
"You know Sam, my many family issues. The ones that give me such baggage that I can't be in a functional relationship. The baggage that prevents Dr. Phil from being able to help me in his allotted hour time slot" she spat. "Maybe he can do a serious to fix my broken life. He has that special house for people like me right?"
Sam sat stunned, realizing it was the same example he had given his mother that morning in his house. His mouth hung open unsure of how to proceed after being hit with the information that she had heard his rant. "Mercedes" he said softly wanting to explain.
"Just get out of my truck" Mercedes huffed not wanting him to say another word to her as she turned her attention to the windshield in front of her..
"Mercedes look-" he began again, as his mind raced on how to make this situation right by explaining his comments.
"GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY TRUCK SAM!" she yelled, turning her fact to him. That's when he saw it. He saw tears begin to stream down her cheeks. Mercedes was crying, the one thing she promised she never do over any man, after that afternoon she begged her father not to leave. The sight sent a chill down his spine. He opened the door without another word, as she started up the engine wiping away the evidence of her hurt simultaneously. He took a step back onto the side walk as Mercedes quickly checked her blind spot to make sure the street was clear before she skirted into traffic, speeding away from the building, just as the rest of the group was coming out. Finn stood next to a still silent Sam.
"Man, I wonder what has her so in a hurry?" Finn asked seemingly to no one as they watched her truck speed off, disappearing into the mix of cars and taxies.
"I don't know" Sam answered shrugging his left shoulder, not even taking the time to cover the tick. But he knew the real reason she was so upset and he finally understood why all of his voicemails went unanswered. But what he didn't know was how he was going to make everything right.
So yeah that was harsh huh? But don't freat my loves because the next chapter will at least have a party in it. No good? *Hangs head* lol don't worry we'll get there. Love ya for reading!