Thanks for all the reviews, and special thanks as always to my wonderfully charming and brilliant beta riftintime.

Chapter 25

Ianto arrived at work at his usual time the following morning. He'd left Jack's flat, somewhat reluctantly, shortly after midnight, murmuring excuses about having to work in the morning. Jack hadn't seemed inclined to kick him out of bed, but he hadn't asked him to stay the night either, and gave no protest when Ianto made his excuses. Though they'd shared more intimacies than merely sex, having decided that their relationship couldn't be anything more than casual, he hadn't wanted to confuse the matter by spending the night in Jack's bed. Furthermore, he'd wanted a bit of time for self-reflection. The intensity of the evening with Jack had been at times overwhelming, and he'd needed some space on his own to sort through his emotions.

He'd driven the SUV back to his flat, showered, and climbed into bed, feeling exhausted. Despite his fatigue, however, he'd remained awake for several hours, trying to make sense of what he was feeling. There was no single emotion he could lay claim to. He was moved by everything that Jack had shared with him about his past, he was still somewhat confused by his undeniable sexual and emotional attraction to a man, he was suffering from a profound sense of guilt for having allowed the child Jasmine to go with the 'fairies,' and he was nervous about confronting his team after their obvious censure. The heavy burden had made sleep elusive, and he'd tossed and turned as his mind churned over the various issues. It wasn't until the early hours of the morning that he'd finally fallen into a fitful sleep, and the alarm going off had been almost a relief.

After hanging up his coat, Ianto made his way to the kitchenette to brew his usual morning coffee, feeling an especially urgent need for his daily caffeine fix. He was just savoring the first sip when he heard the cogwheel door roll open, announcing the arrival of one of his team. Bracing himself for a confrontation, he quickly downed half of his coffee to help fortify himself for the trials ahead. Tosh appeared in the doorway, still wearing her coat. "Morning Tosh," he said, setting his mug on the counter and looking at her somewhat uncertainly.

Tosh took a step forward and suddenly threw her arms around Ianto's neck, embracing him tightly. Ianto, somewhat startled, tentatively patted her back. "We should have stood by you yesterday," she said, still holding him tightly. "We shouldn't have judged you like that. It was a horrible decision to have to make. I'm just glad that I wasn't the one who had to make it." She released Ianto and looked up at him remorsefully. "I was thinking about it all last night," she continued. "You didn't have a choice. I understand that now. I feel terrible for having turned my back on you. I thought about calling you in the middle of the night when my guilt became unbearable, but I didn't want to make matters worse."

Ianto was more moved than he could express. "It's okay, Tosh," he said, managing to maintain his composure, though he felt like hugging her all over again in gratitude. "I understand how you felt. I might have done the same thing if I was in your shoes."

"I feel horribly guilty," Tosh repeated. "Like I betrayed you or something."

Ianto shook his head. "You didn't."

"I think the others feel the same way," Tosh said, starting to unbutton her coat.

Ianto turned to the coffee machine to pour Tosh a cup as she peeled off her jacket and flung it on a nearby chair. A wave of relief rolled over him, calming the churning that had begun in the pit of his stomach. At least Tosh doesn't blame me, he thought as he fixed her coffee the way she liked it. I think I can face Owen and Gwen if I have Tosh on my side. Ianto handed her the mug and she accepted it with a grateful smile. They sat down at the little table in the kitchenette. "It started with all of us letting off steam," she said after she'd taken a sip of her coffee. "We were in shock, and then we were angry at you…" she hesitated, glancing at Ianto, who nodded for her to continue. "And then after we'd all gotten it out of our systems, it became obvious to all of us that you really didn't have a choice. We were quiet for a long time after that." She took another sip of coffee. "Then Gwen and Owen proceeded to get completely pissed. Gwen passed out on Owen's sofa. Owen kissed me, and we had to call Rhys to come pick her up." Tosh quickly took another sip of her coffee.

Ianto blinked. "What was the… middle thing?" he asked, eyeing Tosh with amusement.

"Gwen passed out on Owen's sofa?" Tosh asked, not meeting his eyes.

"No… Not that. I believe it was the fact listed immediately after that one." Ianto couldn't help the teasing smile that played over his lips.

"Oh, you mean that Owen kissed me," Tosh said innocently.

"Yup, that's the one." Ianto nodded.

Tosh shrugged her shoulders, but Ianto could see a hint of color creeping into her cheeks. "Toshiko Sato, I do believe you're blushing."

"Of course I didn't let it go any further than that," Tosh said, ignoring his teasing. "I mean, he was shagging Gwen until recently…" She paused and made a face. "Besides, he's a bit of a tosser."

"But charming, in his way," Ianto conceded.

"I suppose." Tosh looked thoughtful. "And how's Jack?" she asked suddenly, catching Ianto off guard.

It was Ianto's turn to blush. "Well, he was very nice to me after yesterday."

"Was he?" Tosh looked suspicious, and Ianto felt the heat in his cheeks growing in intensity.

"Very nice," Ianto reiterated, trying to look innocent.

"I see," Tosh said, and then she began to giggle. "If you could have seen the look on your face when I walked in on the two of you." Her giggle turned into laughter.

Ianto couldn't help joining her. Her laugh was infectious and it felt good to laugh after so much emotional turmoil. Besides, he thought with amusement, I suppose I did look rather ridiculous… it's nice that we can laugh about it now.

They were still chuckling when the cogwheel door rolled open again, and a few moments later, Gwen appeared in the doorway. "What's all this?"

"I was telling Ianto about your passing out on Owen's sofa and Rhys carrying you out of the flat," Tosh said smoothly. "And I told him that we were sorry for the way we treated him yesterday and that we realized he had to make an impossible decision." Tosh gave her a stern look.

Gwen managed to look contrite. "Yeah. I'm sorry, Ianto. It's just that…"

"It's okay, Gwen," Ianto said quickly, unwilling to let Gwen finish her sentence. The last thing he wanted to do was to rehash or to hear Gwen's conciliatory remarks. "Have some coffee and join us," he said, waving a hand towards the coffee pot.

She had poured herself a cup and was just sitting down at the table with them when the cogwheel door rolled open once again and Owen joined them. He patted Ianto gruffly on the shoulder and muttered, "Alright, mate?"

Ianto understood that it was Owen's way of apologizing, and he accepted it with a nod. Owen fixed himself a mug of coffee and joined them. They chatted amiably for several minutes about nothing in particular. Ianto found himself relaxing and smiling around at his team. They had forgiven him, just like Jack said they would.

A Rift alarm interrupted their conversation, and the four of them got up to begin the working day.

It wasn't until over a week later that Ianto spoke to Jack again. He had been kept busy by the Rift, but it was nothing out of the ordinary and nothing he felt that his team couldn't handle – a few Weevils, some benign flotsam and jetsam, and an alien spacecraft which had become lost and had entered Earth's orbit. But then a skeleton had been discovered at a construction site with unusual injuries that had distressed Owen, and a strange alien artifact had been found along side the skeleton that had confounded Ianto. But what concerned him was that Tosh had been behaving peculiarly since they'd made the discovery. She had become secretive, moody, and what alarmed Ianto the most, unreliable. It was entirely unlike Tosh to be irresponsible, and out of growing concern for her, he decided to call Jack.

It wasn't until he had his mobile in his hand and he was staring down at Jack's number, his heart thudding uncomfortably in his chest as his finger hovered over the 'call' button, that he realized he'd been avoiding the other man. You're being childish, he remonstrated with himself, remembering how Tosh had abruptly left the Hub earlier that day without a word of explanation.

Ianto sat up straighter in his office chair, plastered a professional façade across his features, though there was no one about to see him, and punched the button forcefully. He cleared his throat uncomfortably as he listened to the phone ring.

Jack had spent the past week brooding. He knew that he was brooding, but he'd allowed himself the luxury of his despondency. He had, at first, been excited after his evening with Ianto. It had been a long time since he'd been that intimate with anyone – either physically and emotionally, and he had spent the next day in a sort of post-coital high. He had wanted to ask Ianto to stay the night with him, but when the other man had intimated that he had to get up early the next morning for work, Jack hadn't protested. I guess we need bit of space, he'd though as he'd watched Ianto get out of bed and slip into his clothing. Don't want this to get too serious…

He'd been inspired by his undeniable bond with Ianto. Not only was he quite taken with the intriguing young man, he'd thought that he would now become more a part of the Torchwood team, rather than merely a freelancer. He was surprised to discover how much he wanted to be an integral part of the team. He was tired of being on the outside looking in. Spending time with Ianto had reawakened a desire to connect to people again, to find a place where he belonged, instead of always keeping distant and aloof. He almost forgot that he was just biding his time, waiting for the Doctor to appear. Suddenly, he wanted to live his life, not just stand back and linger as time passed. He'd done that for so many decades.

But as the three days turned into four and then five without word from Ianto, Jack had grown more and more dejected. He'd tried to reason with himself. I told him that we couldn't be anything more than casual. I told him that I wouldn't be around for long. It's not fair of me to expect anything from him. Despite his reasoning, he was disappointed, and his disappointment made him angry. He'd spent several nights on various rooftops, looking up at the stars, wondering where the Doctor was, and trying not to think about Ianto. He'd even considered taking comfort in some warm body or other, but had found the idea distasteful, much to his chagrin. Damn you, Ianto Jones, he'd found himself thinking more than once.

He'd taken to hunting Weevils in the woods at night, desperate for a distraction from his troubled thoughts and a physical release of tension. He'd even allowed one or two to kill him, seeking comfort from the brief period of darkness that his 'death' allowed. It never lasted. He always came back. He was so tired of always coming back.

He'd also spent some time wandering around Cardiff, checking in on the various alien establishments with which he was acquainted, and starting one or two brawls among the clientele when the mood suited him. He'd just been physically thrown out of a pub by an ill-tempered Betrushian when his phone rang. Still lying on the ground, he pulled his mobile out of his pocket and looked at the screen. It was Ianto. He felt his heart start to beat faster, but at the same time, resentment welled up inside him. He wiped the blood from his mouth and pressed the answer button. "Jones," he said brusquely, not even attempting to hide his anger.

"Jack? I need your help."

His anger faded instantly at the sincerity in Ianto's tone. He jumped to his feet. "I'm on my way."