Ren-sama's Note:
Since I can't wait for Zero's birthday anymore, and I don't even know when it is, I decided to have it now, just like how Kaname had his own.
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Chapter 25
Zero sighed, his silver hair glinting beautifully under the moonlight. "May I ask… what this is all about?" He scowled at the noble Night Class vampires surrounding him in the forest, far from the Moon Dorm.
"I'm sorry for this rough treatment, Zero-kun." Takuma bowed to him, earning some looks of confusion from the other Night Class students. Only Shiki seemed to have understood as he too bowed a little, not being used to doing it to his rival yet.
Ruka wanted to comment on the humble approach by the two lovers but Aido was much too impatient for anything else right now.
"We want to know how you really feel for Kaname-sama, Kiryuu." He asked as he crossed his arms over his chest. Zero arched an eyebrow at him, slowly getting where the conversation was heading.
"And we don't want any wishy-washy kind of answer." Kain voiced next. "We need a full, clarified and sure answer, Kiryuu."
Zero did his best to hide his blush. He actually wanted to laugh at them and tell to their faces that he and Kaname were already past that stage a long time ago. But he didn't want to shock them, especially since they were doing everything for their leader. It was so sweet of them to do something like that for Kaname. Also, he didn't think he could just plainly voice out his feelings in public like that. It took him such a long time before he could voice it to Kaname quietly.
"Why do you want to know?" He asked a question of his own instead. His scowl was firmly in place.
Takuma was the one who spoke this time. "We know it might anger Kaname if we were to tell you this. But he loves you, Zero-kun." His eyes were showing nothing but sincerity. "He wants nothing more than to be with you. And if you somehow feel the same way, even a little bit, please give him a chance to show his feelings to you."
Zero and Kaname were already lovers by now, but the words that came out of Takuma's mouth still very much embarrassed him. But it was a nice feeling this time.
"Kiryuu, please be our Leader's–" Aido was about to bow down when he suddenly stopped, suddenly feeling dread at the approaching presence.
"Please be our Leader's what, Aido?" A ringing voice echoed all throughout the premise and all of them immediately stiffened, faces paling to varying degrees. Kaname showed himself not too far from them then, looking quite amused. Zero scowled at him for messing with the Night Class like that. He knew very much what Aido was about to say, that pervert.
"I-I… meant, um, Kaname-sama… I…" Aido could feel his whole body trembling. It was considered sacrilege to get themselves mixed up in a pureblood's private life. Moreover, the decision-making of that certain pureblood's would-be mate.
"I apologize, Kaname." Takuma bowed. "We kind of told Zero-kun… about your feelings for him." He knew there was no way out of this one. The only thing to do to dissipate a little of Kaname's anger was to be honest as much as possible. To their surprise, however, Kaname let out a small chuckle.
"And?" The brunette pureblood asked, much to his subordinates' surprise. "What did he say?" His eyes then darted to Zero's scowling expression just as the latter did his best to stay immobile, probably wishing that he's non-existent at the moment.
"He hasn't told us yet." Ruka was the one who answered, still afraid of punishment.
"If he doesn't want to talk, there's no way you should be forcing him." Kaname answered as he smirked to himself. Zero clearly saw that action and scowled even more, blushing up to the tips of his ears. "Now, apologize."
Aido mumbled something to himself about failure and punishment before all of them bowed deeply and apologized to the hunter. They all left the premise quietly, all thinking of the would-be punishment that they would surely receive.
Zero could only sigh as he watched their backs silently. He glared at Kaname when they were all gone. "…Sadistic leader." Kaname laughed out loud at that, his laughs ringing all throughout the forest and causing such a strong tremble and delight in the deepest part of the hunter's body. Zero's scowl deepened as his cheeks colored up.
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"Ne, don't you think there's something different about the air surrounding Kaname-sama and Kiryuu?" Aido asked Takuma as they passed the Moon Dorm's gate the next afternoon and saw how Kaname strode over to where Zero was and talked to him quietly. Zero didn't seem to mind at all and in fact even engaged to the conversation himself.
Takuma only creased his eyebrows before he seemed to have gotten it. "Well, I guess." The other vampires could only stare in shock as their leader talked to the prefect shamelessly and conversed with the latter in front of everyone. Kaname never did that to anyone, except sometimes with Yuuki.
And since Kaname took time to actually stop in his tracks, all the other vampires also stopped and watched their leader in deep curiosity and anticipation. The Day Class Students were all dumbfounded and clueless as well, but they nevertheless liked the scene so they watched with eager eyes as their idols stopped. That only meant more time for them to ogle the Night Class students.
"Oy, oy!" They all watched Yuzuru march over to Kaname with his big brother attitude as always with Yuuki trying her best to stop her lover. "Don't you dare act–mph!" Yuuki uttered some apology as she did her best to put her hands on her lover's mouth. Yuzuru could only flail in his lover's arms as he watched helplessly how Zero got stolen by Kaname. Or so that's how he saw the conversation anyway.
Kaname only looked at Yuzuru oddly before he gave one of his cool and degrading smiles which annoyed the brunette hunter even more. The pureblood didn't seem to care at all since he already faced Zero once again. "Well then, see you, Zero." They almost gaped at the sensual and intimate way Kaname addressed the teen and Zero visibly blushed at that – well, at least to the vampires who could see his blood circulation inside his body.
Zero averted his gaze with a scowl as he tried his best to hide his embarrassment from public/vampire eyes before he answered in a barely audible voice. "Whatever…"
After a while, Kaname and the others managed to get to the classroom and all of them were eyeing their leader curiously. They knew they were being rude and should just let go of it, but their curiosity was getting the best of them. They never really wanted to ask Kaname about it personally and they also didn't think the pureblood would open it up on his own so they had no choice but to just stare at him.
Takuma, seeing that everyone was having their own hyper-active imagination in progress, couldn't help but take action himself. He didn't want others to misinterpret anything so he decided to just ask Kaname directly. It would also be a good opportunity to tell everyone who Zero really was to Kaname's life. Meaning: Off-limits in any kind of way.
"Err, Kaname, are you and Zero-kun lovers now?" He asked as he sat in his usual chair beside the pureblood. The others also sat in their own chairs but they were still looking at their Leader, waiting for the answer. Some of them were even surprised at the question itself.
To their astonishment, however, Kaname only looked at Takuma as if wanting the blonde to interpret the unusual gleam in his eyes. They especially gaped openly with wide eyes when Kaname actually chuckled when Takuma stayed silent, obviously thinking about it on his own. "Isn't it obvious, Takuma?" His question was sarcastic, but his tone was way too joyous and excited that the words didn't have the desired effect at all. Not to mention he lacked his usual stoicism and coolness. He looked like a child so eager to tell his parents that he did great in the exam.
Even Aido couldn't react at all. He was happy for his Kaname-sama, really. But somehow, it wasn't the kind of happiness that he hoped. He thought it might have had to do something with the fact that it was Zero who became Kaname's mate. But he wasn't entirely sure. All he knew was that Zero was off-limits to anyone now. Off-limits to anyone else but his Kaname-sama… But he was nevertheless happy for both of them. Really, he was.
"It really is a bizarre thing… this 'love', it seems." Shiki suddenly voiced and all of them looked at him as if silently asking him to just shut up in case Kaname's mood changed again. "Nah, nothing and no one can change Kaname-sama's mood now except Kiryuu himself." Instead of looking offended, however, Kaname actually smiled at him smugly, again much to everyone's surprise.
"Congratulations, Kaname." Takuma chuckled. The others also bowed deeply and uttered the same words the blonde just voiced out. "So… he's your mate now, right?" The blonde asked just in case they weren't at that stage yet.
Kaname looked at his subordinates for a while. And seeing that all the vampires there were part of his inner circle anyway, he decided to just tell them the truth. "Yes, he is. It also means that you will treat my mate with the same respect you show me." And then he smiled coldly at them as the temperature of the room suddenly dropped a few degrees Celsius. "And just so no one will even dare make any mistake, let me tell you this now. Zero is mine." They all gulped visibly as they nodded.
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Zero stared at his right hand as he felt the all too familiar fear that gripped his heart for more than a decade now.
"Calm down, Zero." Kaname's commanding and yet at the same time soothing voice made him exhale audibly as he stared at his hand again. Or more specifically, his burning hand.
As to how this particular event happened, Zero still didn't know. All he knew was the fact that Kaname managed to make him go to the lakeside saying he wanted to watch some fireflies tonight. Zero knew there wouldn't be any fireflies at this time of the year but he still sighed and agreed when he saw the excited gleam in the other's eyes. He didn't want to spoil it… yet. Of course, those gleaming eyes turned into pouting lips as they saw how Zero was right. There really weren't any fireflies tonight. And instead of watching fireflies, they decided to just watch the night sky and millions of glittering stars in the cloudless firmament.
And that's also the moment Kaname talked about his power and how he should control it instead of fearing it.
Right now, they sat near the rose bushes as Kaname tried to make Zero control it even a little bit while Zero sat there staring fearfully at his hand in fire. It's obvious that the silver-haired teen wanted to shake his hand furiously to put out the fire. Kaname's dedicated way of wanting him to control it was the only thing preventing him from doing so.
"Kaname, can I put it out now?" Zero asked for the nth time now and he knew he would ask many more of these kinds of questions in the near future.
"But Zero, I want to see how it looks like when you're calm." Kaname turned into his childish mode again and if Zero wasn't in this predicament, he would've laughed. It seemed Yuuki wasn't the only one taking it after Cross these past few days.
The hunter looked at his burning hand again in fear even though he couldn't feel any pain from the fire itself. But the feeling itself, or lack thereof, already scared him since he knew it wasn't natural. He breathed deeply for the nth time as he tried to will himself to calm down even for just a bit. He closed his eyes so he wouldn't panic at the sight of his body burning. And instead of focusing his mind at the fire on his hand, he tried to focus his senses on Kaname. Aside from the blue roses, the pureblood's extremely pleasant and delectable scent permeated the air. That itself was enough to calm his nerves down.
"Zero…" Kaname's awed voice made the hunter open his eyes again and, to his surprise, his normally red-colored fire turned blue without his knowledge. They both stared at the blue fire with wide eyes filled with awe and amazement for a while before Kaname talked again. "Your power… is beautiful... It's very beautiful, Zero."
At those words, Zero's wide amethyst eyes turned to Kaname's chocolate orbs as he drank on the sight of Kaname's awed and proud expression. He couldn't help but accept his power, or even like it a little bit, because of those eyes. "It's not… frightening?"
Kaname shook his head as he stared at Zero once again. "Zero, almost all students in the Night Class have the ability to control a certain element. It's not very uncommon. No, it's not uncommon at all. You just happened to have the power to control the fire element. That's all. So there's no need to fear it."
Zero's body trembled at those words. How he wanted to hear them, he realized. And after he carefully put out the blue fire in his hand, he immediately hugged Kaname tightly. "…Thank you." He voiced quietly.
Kaname was surprised because it was actually the first time Zero initiated a hug, but he was nevertheless happy. "You did great, Zero." He encouraged quietly as he returned the hug with equal intensity. "I love you." And he kissed the hunter's hair before he inhaled its scent.
Zero couldn't help but redden at the sudden bout of embarrassing words. Leave it to Kaname to do just that in these kinds of times. "Kaname, I… I too… love you…" He whispered back, too embarrassed to face Kaname now. It's the first time he said the words aloud and who knew what kind of expression Kaname would wear. But still, he couldn't help but peak a little. And his eyes widened when he saw Kaname's rosy cheeks as well as his red ears. Somehow, that made him blush deeply too, but in happiness.
"Zero… I," Kaname shook his head before he started the words again. "I know it's unconventional, but I can't help but think that I'm thankful for that secret mission you took." Zero blinked at him and he kissed the hunter's forehead before he spoke again. "If it weren't for that spying mission, you wouldn't have come here in the first place. And I surely wouldn't have met you."
Zero blinked again, still overwhelmed at the words, before he chuckled lightly. "No, I'm sure we would've still met one way or another. After all, Cross is my uncle and your younger sister is his daughter. Not to mention I'm actually a vampire whose blood was just sealed. So I'm sure we still would've met." And as if realizing he actually said some embarrassing cheesy lines back there, Zero bit his lower lip and hid his face by hugging Kaname tighter.
Kaname, on the other hand, wanted nothing but to make love with Zero again after hearing those words. "I want to make love with you, Zero."
"Err…" Zero frankly didn't know if he would just nod or if he would plainly refuse the obviously scam offer of the perverted pureblood. But he still let himself be carried as Kaname decided that he wanted to do it in his room in the Moon Dorm since no one would dare interrupt them there.
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If anyone noticed how Zero seemed more cheerful than usual these past few days, no one dared tell him that. Or if anyone saw how Kaname would sometimes smile to himself even in the middle of class, absolutely no one would even dare tell him that.
"Yes, that's it, Zero!" Kaname excited voice echoed in the bushes as he watched the hunter with gleaming eyes.
"…Like this?" Zero asked in embarrassment as he moved his hand a bit. After a while, he moved his hand more and more. The teen couldn't help but smile in satisfaction seeing Kaname's expression. Kaname looked more than happy right now.
"That's it, Zero. You're becoming so good at this!" Kaname voiced again as he watched the charming scowl that adorned the other's face at his last comment.
"Don't talk in that perverted way of yours, Kaname." Zero said as he scowled. He looked at his hands again as he tried to manipulate the blue fire once more. He's calmed down enough to make it obey his will, but he was still a little unsure.
Kaname chuckled at his comment as the pureblood evilly smirked. "And if anyone passed by the bushes, they'd definitely think we're doing something indecent and make sure to stay away. Sounds like a good plan to make others leave us alone, right?"
"Idiot." Zero only muttered as he focused his attention to what he's doing again. He moved his hand a little so the fire wasn't burning his hands anymore and instead holding it like a fireball.
"But really, Zero. You're really becoming so good at controlling your power." Kaname praised. "In just a short time, you already managed to do that." And it seemed he thought of some idea as his eyes gleamed again. "How about producing two more fire balls and joggling it in the air so you'll learn more control."
Zero narrowed his eyes in suspicion at the pureblood's excited voice but he still tried to produce more blue fire balls. After that, he tried to joggle the balls with his two hands as he watched how the fire balls leave a trail of flame as he did, much like a wishing star but only circular in motion. They both stared at the fire balls in wonder, obviously amazed at the beautiful orbs.
After a while, Zero found himself exhausted of energy as he did his best to put out the fire. "It's quite tiring."
"Of course, since it eats a lot of your energy." Kaname answered. "It's also exactly because of that that you have to gain more control over it. And also practice more so you won't get exhausted so easily every time you use it." He looked like a mother trying to make his child learn discipline, and he actually looked satisfied when Zero nodded at him in understanding.
"…I wonder why it suddenly turned blue though." Zero voiced after a while. "I remember seeing it color red when it first started appearing."
"That might have meant it was still raw and uncontrolled fire power then." Kaname answered after some thinking. "It must have stabilized and turned blue, its true color, after you calmed down that night. But that's just speculation since Kain's power, even in its stabilized form, is red. Well, he is he and you are you." Zero chuckled at that.
"Thank you again, Kaname." He said as they both stood up from their seats on the grasses beside the lake. They've been practicing Zero's power for some nights now and the teen didn't fear it as much as before. He's also starting to actually like it more now. It was all thanks to Kaname's encouragement and also insane requests/commands while having excited eyes, like the joggling thing earlier.
Kaname petted Zero's silky hair before he leaned down for a kiss. Zero shyly welcomed his lips and the pureblood gently nipped the other's lips as he savored the hunter's taste. The kiss was sweet and gentle but still arousing enough for both of them. After a while, they broke the kiss as they let air fill their lungs once more.
"What's your power, by the way?" Zero asked when they calmed down. It just didn't occur to him to ask back then. But he was curious now. He knew it was something about mind power since Kaname has the ability to close the door or turn off lights without touching them.
Kaname chuckled before he answered. He found Zero's curious expression extremely adorable, not to mention totally gorgeous. "I have the power to touch and move things with my mind. But that's not all." "Also… to destroy things with my mind alone…"
"What else?" Zero asked, a little curious at Kaname's silence. The pureblood shook his head before he answered again.
"Nothing. That other one is not necessary anymore." Kaname answered with a smile. He learned that power after he managed to drink all of Shizuka's blood. It's like an upgrade to his current power, but he rarely used it since he still couldn't control it that much. "Oh, by the way, we won't be having any session tomorrow night, Zero."
"…Why?" Zero asked again, but Kaname merely kissed his nose as the brunette laughed. The hunter scrunched up his nose at the sudden sensation of lips on it before he looked at Kaname wearing his scowl again.
"It's a secret, Zero." And he kissed Zero on the lips once more before the other could even voice any protest.
They both bade one another goodbye after a while and Zero immediately went to the Sun Dorm in vampire speed. He wanted to tell Cross about his power for a while now but he was still afraid. He didn't want Cross to think of him differently. And right now, Cross was asleep anyway so he decided to just tell the older man about his lessons with Kaname tomorrow when he wakes up. His eyes closed and he slept soundly in exhaustion the moment his head hit the pillow.
The whole house was on fire as Zero stood up in the middle of the falling debris, crying. "Oto-san! Oka-san! Ichiru!" He called in a pained voice. "I didn't do it! It wasn't me! Please!"
And he ran in the different sections of the house looking for them. What he saw made him scream, horrified, as he stumbled on the floor crying. His father lay over his mother, obviously trying to protect her. His mother, on the other hand, was hugging Ichiru's small form as they all burned terribly. The fire was black in color and Zero knew it wasn't his. It couldn't have been his.
And he cried louder as he tried to come near them, but in vain. The smoke was black, the fire was black, even his vision was getting darker and darker by the second. "Please… it wasn't me… it wasn't me… You can't be dead… Please wake up…"
It wasn't supposed to be him. But he also didn't know who else would own that power. No, it couldn't have been anybody but him. He knew that, and yet, he didn't want to admit it. He didn't want to admit that he's the reason for their deaths.
And he gasped in fright as his eyes opened widely. The first thing that greeted him was the sight of Kaname's worried eyes. "K-Kaname…" His voice trembled a lot with only a name. He didn't know how he would manage to talk about it at all.
"Zero…" Kaname knelt on top of the covers as he hugged the hunter. He felt it from their bond, the extreme fright that Zero had gone through, but he didn't know what kind of nightmare the teen saw. "It's okay. It's only a nightmare."
Zero gripped the back of his lover's shirt tightly as he let himself be calmed down by Kaname's scent and calm presence. "No… Kaname… I…" He gulped down the lump in his throat as he cried. "I killed them… I killed them…" He'd learned from experience that most of his childhood dreams were parts of his sealed memory leaking out so he knew there was no way it could've been a mere dream.
Kaname closed his eyes as he hugged his lover tighter. What a way to greet Zero on his birthday, Nightmare. "Zero, it's only a nightmare." He voiced gently as he kissed the hair of the still sobbing teen. But he also deeply wished it was merely just a nightmare. Since he knew Zero's background, he knew what Zero was talking about. He knew… and he didn't have the heart to tell Zero about it…
Zero would call his name once in a while, but mostly all the hunter did was cry in his arms. Rarely was Zero this broken and the pureblood didn't know what to do. He didn't know how long the teen cried in his arms or how much time have passed since then. All he could feel was the burning pain in his heart while he heard Zero's broken crying voice. All he knew was the fact that if Zero continued breaking like this, he himself might die of heartbreak as well.
Kaname brushed the teen's hair with his hand in a calming manner and he also whispered comforting words to the teen as he slowly felt Zero calm down.
"Kaname…" Zero voiced after a while. "…It's not… a mere nightmare, is it?" Kaname stilled for a while. He didn't know if he would blatantly lie to his lover just to comfort him and place him in a false sense of security, or if he could even dare tell Zero the truth and break him. "Kaname… tell me…" He knew that Zero knew he had investigated the teen's past. And it seemed Zero knew that he knew what really happened back then.
Instead of answering, however, Kaname merely hugged Zero tighter. That in itself was enough of an answer. "I see…" Zero quietly whispered. "I see… So I really am… a monster…"
"Zero…" He voiced for the first time. He wanted to tell Zero that that wasn't true, that the teen wasn't at fault for what happened since he was too young to control everything. But he couldn't find the right words. All he could repeatedly say right now was the hunter's given name which he loved voicing out so much. How he loved Zero so much…
"Kaname, you're more depressed than me..." Zero let out a mirthless chuckle, but he meant what he said. He didn't need the bond to feel Kaname's intensely depressed aura in the room. "You should be the one to cheer me up, not get depressed together with me. Or we'll be the depressed couple forever."
"…I didn't tell you," Kaname voiced after a while. "…because I didn't want you to blame yourself. You didn't kill them, Zero. It's an accident. Please don't blame yourself for it. Don't hate your power, Zero."
"…I know that. I'm not a child anymore." Zero sighed as he tried to calm himself down. "But that doesn't change the fact that they died because of me… because… of this power…" Actually, he wanted to ask Kaname why the pureblood still made him train his power even with the knowledge that that very power had once destroyed his whole family. Or maybe that's actually the reason for the training… to make him control it… so that kind of accident wouldn't have to happen anymore… He wanted to know why Kaname still seemed to like it, even though it killed Zero's own family. That… he knew he wouldn't be able to answer, nor would he be able to ask Kaname about it… He loved Kaname. He didn't want the pureblood to be depressed or sad because of him. But it seemed to be a little too late now…
"Zero, I love you." Kaname voiced. "I'm sure that's also the reason why Cross didn't tell you. And that's also the reason why Yagari-san sealed your memory of that night."
Zero could feel the ugly feeling called despair deep inside his heart. But Kaname's words as he whispered them to his ears were enough to drive the darkness away. He basked in the pureblood's warm presence as well as his comforting words for some more minutes until he felt that he could face Cross and the others again. "Kaname… I… thank you."
Kaname merely shook his head and kissed Zero's lips before he whispered, "I love you, Zero." And he kissed the teen on the lips again. "I know it's late, and not at all appropriate during this moment. But still… Happy Birthday, Zero."
Zero's eyes widened as he remembered the date today, momentarily driving the depressing thoughts away. He's kind of forgotten that today was his birthday because he never really got to celebrate it during the past few years. He was always in a mission or it was Yagari and/or Yuzuru who were on the mission during those times so he mostly never had the chance to celebrate it with them. There were even times when his life would be in so much danger from his job as a hunter that his birthday seemed insignificant somehow. Of course, they still celebrated it, but not at the exact date, so the date started to get blurred during the years. "Thank you." He voiced in appreciation.
The hunter looked at the window and saw that the sun was already high up in the sky. Really, no matter how hard he got dragged into the darkness, his surroundings would just continue to move on without waiting for him to recover at all. It seemed the shining ball of fire was mocking him now too. How annoying. It's annoying that while he let himself get depressed like this, the sun and everything else in his surrounding would go on like nothing happened. Or maybe… that's exactly the beauty of it…
Now that he thought about it, it also meant that he's already late to go to school. Maybe Yuuki and Yuzuru were already at school now. Ah, no, that's not right. Today'sSaturday so there wouldn't be any class.
"Shall we go have breakfast downstairs?" Kaname offered and Zero actually raised an eyebrow at him.
"Aren't you a little too confident in a Dorm that isn't even yours?" He voiced.
Kaname only chuckled. He very well knew that Zero was just showing his usual self since he didn't want the brunette to worry, and Kaname greatly appreciated that. But he was still worried since Zero would most likely worry about it on his own. He wouldn't let that happen.
And thus, the two of them bathed in the bathroom, one at a time of course despite Kaname's protests and continuous pouts, and changed their clothes. They went down the stairs quietly just like the graceful vampires that they were before they went to the kitchen. Zero felt that there were quite many presences in the kitchen as they neared. But he didn't think too much about it since the place wasn't his anyway. And Cross was in the kitchen too so he's sure there's no way those Night Class's presences were in there for trouble. Kaname lead him with a smile as they both entered the place, and what Zero saw made his eyes widen in surprise.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ZERO/ZERO-KUN/KIRYUU/KIRYUU-SAN!" And thousands of tiny confetti and glitters flew up in the air in welcome for his arrival as he stared at them all in both shock and awe. Kaname chuckled behind him but the thought of jabbing the pureblood on the side with his elbow didn't even enter his mind even though it would've already did in any normal occasion.
Yuuki and Yuzuru chuckled at his surprised expression while Cross took that time to hug the hell out of him. Aido and Takuma guided him to the table together with Kaname. The pureblood sat beside Zero while Yuzuru and Yuuki were on his other side. Cross sat across from him together with Aido. Rima and Ruka chose to sit on another table together with Kain, Seiren, Takuma, and Shiki. There were also other Day Class students in the place like Yuuki's friends Kaori, Yoru, Sai, and Rika. Even the Sun Dorm President Motoko was there. Not to mention there were many gifts on the table just beside the foods.
He smiled at them all for the surprise party and he knew they would wait for his answer any time soon so he decided to give them a small speech. "Well… I'm… I'm surprised. And touched… I never thought I'd still be celebrating my birthday this year so..." And then he remembered there were Day Class students who wouldn't understand his situation as 'Level E' or hunter – if the sudden gasps and curious eyes blinking at him in confusion were any indication – so he stopped there and scratched the back of his neck in embarrassment. "…Um, thank you, everyone, for this party. It made me really happy." And he bowed at them all to show his deep gratitude.
"What a way to suddenly spoil the mood." Aido let out his tongue in his own childish way of teasing while Zero only arched an eyebrow at him, as if indicating he wasn't affected at all.
"Oh, by the way, master called earlier. He's on a mission so he wasn't able to come. But he greeted you happy birthday too." Yuzuru grinned and Zero smiled at the news. For his master to spend some time to call while on a mission was certainly a little out of character for him.
Afterwards, the whole place was filled with noises as everyone conversed animatedly with their friends or with Zero. Zero would notice that Kaname would sometimes twitch from too much noise but the brunette didn't let others notice that, in vain of course since the silver-haired teen already did. Of course, it wasn't that much fun without some light banters or teasing here and there so they also added that to the bonus.
Zero couldn't help but laugh at some jokes or scowl at some teasing. It was almost noon when they finished with the celebration and everyone was a little too sated with foods and happiness to last the whole week. Some Day Class students went back to their rooms to take some naps while most of them decided to just go out and have some fun. Even the Night Class students decided that they wanted to stroll the town a bit and buy some things. Of course, they all invited Zero and Kaname but the two of them lightly refused, even from Yuuki and Yuzuru's offer. And thus, all of them left leaving the lovers together with Cross.
"…Did you perhaps choose to really stay behind so you can talk to me about something?" Cross asked them both with narrowed eyes, but he was nevertheless smiling. Zero couldn't help but sigh at that. Leave it to Cross to just figure things out without anyone telling him anything. "But before that… we need to clean up first!"
Kaname only chuckled at the older man's antics as he and Zero nodded, a little bit relieved that the talk would have to wait. The silver haired teen was actually more than a little nervous about it. He put the gifts in his room while Kaname chose to clean the floor of confetti and glitters, something he obviously wasn't used to doing if the shabby way he swept the floor was any indication. Cross was the one who took the used utensils and plates into the sink. Afterwards, Kaname and Zero received their favorite tea (for Kaname) and milk (for Zero obviously) just as the older hunter started washing the dishes. The two took their seats in the chairs and they silently watched Cross's back as the latter did his work.
"Alright, we can talk now." Cross voiced after a while. They all knew there would be no one to interrupt or hear their conversation since they were the only ones in the Dorm right now.
Zero looked at Kaname, obviously silently seeking out help. He didn't know how to open up the topic to Cross of all people and he didn't think he could anyway. He didn't want to see Cross's face or expression when he learned that he could remember mostly everything now. He didn't even know if he wouldn't break while voicing it. But he also knew they have to tell him now.
Kaname squeezed his lover's hand under the table as he looked at Cross straightly. "Chairman, it seems the seal on Zero's memory has weakened greatly over the span of ten years." His voice was awfully calm and composed, guiding Zero's emotion all too well. Zero thought that the statement was also a good way to start since it didn't exactly tell Cross directly everything, but still manage to make the latter realize what would come next.
Cross immediately stopped what he's doing when he heard the statement. But he didn't turn around. They both feel his aura being filled with dread as well as deep grief. Zero bit his lower lip in frustration and remorse as he thought that Cross's sadness was brought upon by him.
"Kaien-san… I think…" Zero inhaled deeply before he exhaled, obviously trying to muster the resolve to talk about everything. "I think… I already know what happened ten years ago…" His voice was quiet, but he knew his two companions heard all the same.
"I see." Cross sighed as he turned around wearing the most pained expression he had worn so far. He strode over to where Zero was and immediately hugged the teen, much to Zero's surprise. "I'm so sorry, Zero-kun… I'm so sorry…" His voice was too broken and barely a whisper.
Zero was surprised at the sudden apology, but he was also greatly confused. He knew it was his own fault, but how come Cross was the one apologizing? "Kaien-san?"
"…I'm so sorry, Zero-kun…" Cross's hug tightened even more. "It was all my fault. It was because I encouraged you to show them even though I knew that fever tends to lessen control on power. Even though I knew… I still…" Both Zero and Kaname remained confused at the sudden confession which made no sense for them. Kaname only investigated what happened that night. He didn't learn about Cross being involved in any way at all.
"Kaien-san, it's not your fault. It's… it's mine. I should be the one… apologizing… I'm so sorry, Kaien-san… I'm really sorry…" Zero returned the embrace as he tried his best not to break again. It's enough that he let himself appear weak in front of his lover. He didn't want to appear weak in front of Cross as well. Or anyone else for that matter.
"No, Zero-kun. You still don't remember everything." Cross broke the hug so he could look at his nephew's eyes directly. "You had a fever that night. I took care of you and Ichiru the whole day since your parents were on a mission. I've known about your power then. I learned of your fear to be rejected by your parents so I encouraged you to tell them since I knew they'd understand. I… I encouraged you to show them your newly learned power. It escaped my mind that vampires tend to weaken their control over their power when they are weak or if their body's natural balance is disturbed. In your case, the fever. I didn't… mean to… but it was my idea… I'm so sorry, Zero-kun… I'm so sorry…"
Zero's eyes widened when Cross's tears started falling down one by one and the older man sobbed as he hugged Zero once more, obviously blaming himself for everything all this time. The teen couldn't help but be overwhelmed by the sudden rush of information, but he was more frightened at the sight of Cross breaking into pieces in front of him. "Kaien-san, I… I know it's not your fault… But if it would lessen your burden, then I… I forgive you… I forgive you for everything, Kaien-san… And I'm sure oka-san and oto-san has forgiven you a long time ago too… And I-Ichiru too… They're very kind, so I… I'm sure they've forgiven you… they've already forgiven us…" By the end of his statement, he realized that he too was sobbing while he hugged Cross tightly. Kaname kept on patting his hair to comfort him and he greatly appreciated the effort.
Cross chuckled mirthlessly as he cried. "I'm sorry for being so weak, Zero-kun. I should be the one comforting you and not the other way around… But… thank you… thank you so much… I'm sure… they've already forgiven us a long time ago…"
"I'm sure they're already in peace since the two of you have finally decided to forgive yourselves for what happened." Kaname voiced as he patted both Zero and Cross's head, much to the latter's surprise.
"Yeah…" Cross laughed livelier now as he wiped the tears with his shirt. Kaname gave Zero a hanky all too late since the latter already did exactly the same to his shirt as what Cross did to his own.
Afterwards, Cross sat across the table as Zero and Kaname both drank their forgotten hot drinks. He started telling them what happened then.
"Is Ichiru alright?" Zero asked as he lay in his bed. Cross sat on a chair beside him, taking care of him since he's sick.
Cross chuckled at the question. "Of course, he is. But you can't see him since you're sick. He might catch your cold." Zero only nodded at that.
"Um… Uncle…" Zero voiced after a while.
Cross looked at him and saw how the kid seemed to be trying to decide whether to tell the older male or not. Zero looked at him with fear swimming in the former's eyes before he spoke. "Uncle, I… please don't hate me…" And he sat up on the bed after Cross curiously nodded.
"I won't hate you, no matter what happens, Zero-kun." He smiled gently at his nephew again.
"…Then… then look…" The kid hid his one hand before he slowly showed it to the hunter.
Cross's eyes widened when he saw what Zero was talking about. The blue fire on his nephew's hand was beautiful. But more than that, it made him greatly confused. Zero's vampire side was supposedly sealed. How come his power awakened? He then saw how Zero kept on trying to read his expression and he couldn't help but smile. "It's very beautiful, Zero-kun. It's very beautiful." If he were any other person, or even hunter, he would've already freaked out because his hunter nephew had sprouted vampire powers. But he knew all about Shiro and the latter's power so his surprise was only mild.
"…But oka-san and oto-san don't know. They might get angry…" Zero said in tearful eyes.
"No, I'm sure they'd accept it. I'm sure they'd be proud of you, especially your father." Cross beamed again before he petted his nephew's hair and kissed it. "Alright. You better sleep well so you'll get better soon, okay?" Zero's expression seemed to have lightened after that as the latter smiled back.
Cross sighed. He now knew the reason behind his normally strong nephew's sickness. It seemed the latter's body was trying to adapt to the fire element power and the high fever was the result. He sighed in relief since he knew Zero would get better soon.
"Well, after that, I already left since I also have a mission that night." Cross sighed as he drank his own coffee. "I figured that your parents would've gone back home any minute then so I thought it was already fine to leave you and Ichiru. I only learned about their deaths after a week, after my mission was over."
Zero looked down at his empty glass. He felt much lighter now, but he still couldn't help but be saddened about everything. His heart wanted to just break down and die, but his mind kept on telling him to fight and move on. He was thankful he's a strong-willed individual since he's a hunter. If it weren't for his training in the Association to strengthen his resolve and harden his heart, he would've already lost it the moment he learned that it was really him who killed his parents and younger brother.
"Chairman, I thought you weren't part of the Association anymore during that time?" Kaname's sudden question made Zero look up again. He looked at Kaname and Cross in confusion since he didn't know any of that.
"Yes, I told you your mother became a Level D, right?" Cross asked Zero, and the teen nodded. "Well, during the first few months, she refused to drink blood, not even Shiro-san's blood. She was almost losing her mind and was already on the verge of turning into a Level E. The Association knew that Shiro-san would never accept it so they picked me to do the mission – to kill my one and only sister with my own hands."
Zero's eyes widened at that. He never knew the Association would even give such kind of a mission. He could feel the good image of the Association falling apart in his mind and he couldn't do anything about it at all. The vow 'Mission is everything. Life is nothing before it' seemed like a far-fetch thought for him now. He gritted his teeth when he remembered how the Association also made him spy on his own uncle.
"The envelope was black, meaning the mission was to be kept a secret." Cross's voice brought Zero back to reality and he chose to listen to his uncle rather than to wallow in some other thoughts. Cross put down his empty cup as he sighed again. "Of course, I was called a 'legendary hunter' then. And I was so dedicated to my missions that the envelope shocked me greatly. I didn't know if I would be happy that they trusted me that much or feel mocked." He clasped his hands together and looked at the cup. "Of course, I tried to do the mission for the sake of everyone in danger, and also for my sister too since I don't want her to be hunted down by anyone else. But in the end, I couldn't draw my sword. I was called the strongest hunter in the history of the Cross family and yet I couldn't draw my sword and end her life…"
"So… you retired from the Association?" Zero asked unsurely.
Kaien chuckled mirthlessly as he shook his head. "No, Zero-kun. The Association isn't as forgiving as you think. During those times, they were trying so hard to get rid of Kara and Shiro-san as silently as possible." He stood up from his seat and poured himself another cup of coffee before he sat back and talked. "The Association thought that I didn't do the mission on purpose and that I allied myself with the vampires. They… casted me away. My name was forever tarnished in the eyes of the higher-ups, just as they planned. But for the sake of their pride and my family's name, the news didn't reach the lower level hunters and also the vampires. In addition to the punishment, I shouldn't associate with any of you – the Cross and Kiryuu families – any longer." He smiled bitterly at that. "But of course, Shiro-san took Kara away from the eyes of the Association and hid in the forest where you grew up as a kid. That's also the reason why I could visit you as much as I could. Until that night, that is."
Zero didn't even know if he could still trust the Association now. For them to actually make Cross do the dirty work of killing his own sister… Not to mention punish him greatly when he couldn't do it…
"Zero, the Association doesn't like it when they can't control their hunters, especially the powerful or influential ones." Kaien said as he sipped from his coffee. "They couldn't control me back then so they made up some grand scheme to take me down. I'm sure that they could've done something about Shiro-san and Kara back then if they had the chance too." And he seemed to remember Zero was still part of the association right now. "Oh, sorry for saying such things, Zero… I didn't mean to tarnish the Association's name in front of you…"
Zero merely shook his head as he tried to think of things rationally. Could they have made that secret mission of his to take him down too? Seeing that he was immediately turned into a vampire with the help of a hunter, it's not really that hard to imagine anymore.
"Of course, I still went on missions back then since I'm still a hunter. The Association didn't do anything about it since they also gained from it." Kaien voiced. "But after that night, they had forbidden me to actually see you. They've also forbidden me to actually hunt since they blamed me for what happened. It seems they've sent some spies in the woods and those spies reported that I was always together with you, influencing you greatly. The Association blamed everything to me since they couldn't blame a kid. It wouldn't have looked good on their image if they did. I didn't even know what happened if it weren't for Yagari telling me everything. He also took care of you since he's a family friend of the Cross's. He sealed your memory to prevent you from breaking. And I was told that the Association even went to the extreme of sealing your childhood memories of me and the fact that you're a vampire. That's also the reason why your memories of your parents were also a bit blurred."
"…So it wasn't Master who did the sealing of my other memories…" Zero mumbled after a while. No wonder it wasn't neatly done. "I feel like they just sealed my childhood memory so I won't try to find you."
Cross smiled at that. Zero's words immediately lightened his mood a lot since it meant to say that if Zero had his memories intact back then, he would've gone and looked for his uncle.
"…I think that the reason why your seal is slowly breaking is the fact that you're becoming a lot stronger as a vampire now." Kaname voiced for the first time in a while.
Zero looked at Kaname then and received another squeeze of the hand. He smiled as he looked at Cross again. "Kaien-san… I… I have something… to show you…" He inhaled and exhaled deeply first before he put his right hand on top of the table and showed Cross what he's hiding all this time. He watched as Cross's eyes widened at the sight of the blue fire and even anticipated some negative reactions, but the older hunter seemed to have gone immobile.
"Chairman, I firmly believe that Zero has better control of his power now." Kaname calmly said when they noticed Cross's hands trembling silently. "We've been practicing for some nights now. And I'm sure that a tragedy like ten years ago won't happen this time at all."
Zero himself felt scared again at the sight of the power that had once devoured all his loved ones. But Kaname's words made him hold his ground as he showed Cross the extent of his control. After a while, he put it out and watched his uncle's reaction.
"Zero… I was shocked." Cross voiced. And the two vampires wanted to roll their eyes at the obviousness of his statement. "But that doesn't mean I hate it." The brunette ex-hunter smiled as he looked at his nephew gently. "It's not like back then anymore, back then when you're still a kid and showed me that power. It's… it's different now. Not to mention Kaname and the others are here…" And it felt to him like a huge chunk of lump was taken out his chest. "Thank you, Zero… for showing me your beautiful power."
Zero looked at Cross worriedly first, before his lips turned up to form a small smile. "Thank you too, Kaien-san." "For this unconditional love that you're giving me…"
The sound of Kaname clearing his throat made both hunters looked at the pureblood. Zero arched an eyebrow at the sight of Kaname calming himself down before looking at Cross with determined eyes. "Chairman Cross, there is one more thing that you need to know." Both Cross and Zero's eyes narrowed suspiciously at that.
Cross sat in his seat once again and sipped his coffee as he nodded to Kaname. Zero was still looking at Kaname suspiciously.
Kaname didn't seem deterred at all as he breathed deeply. "Zero and I are dating." And Cross immediately blurted out the coffee in his mouth, effectively showering Kaname's face with it.
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.tbc.
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Ren-sama's Note:
Wahhh, poor Kaname! But I have the inkling that Cross did it on purpose. Hmm. What do you think?