Title: Better With You
Rating: T with potential for M (Will warn if it gets to that)
Disclaimer: I don't own anything in relation to Pretty Little Liars or in relation to any pop culture references that are made in this chapter.
Summary: After spending a large portion of their Summer apart, the girls are back together for their senior year at Rosewood High. Mona is in Radley, Garrett's been arrested, Maya is dead, and emotions still run high. Emily returns from Haiti in hopes to move past what she's been put through, and finds happiness in an unexpected place. A Spemily focused story with mentions of Ezria and Haleb. Storyline with "A" but not the main focus. The story follows the regular season one and two storyline, and begins after the opening scene of season three, however the night ends differently.
A/N – Thank you to aguiarcorina, Breyanaxo, and theorangegirlx for your reviews! And thank you to the few people who PMed me. Y'all asked for more drama so I'm gonna give you some more drama. Sorry this chapter is a little late; I'm still reeling over last week's mid-season finale so it took me a while to get back on track. But I hope you guys like it and don't forget to drop me some feedback. You lot are the best!
Chapter 25 - Gone
"So the first part of the question is asking you for the moles of electrons that need to be transferred into the cell to produce 137 grams of aluminum. Which means you need to turn it into moles using molar mass first. Then, according to the equation, when it's in a compound form it uses a plus 3 charge versus 0 in its elemental form. Which means there's a 3-electron change. So there are 3 moles of electrons per mole of Aluminum, which you're going to use after you convert 137 grams into moles, in order to convert it into moles of electrons," Spencer explains to Aria as she writes out the three-part equation. The two were in the cafeteria during lunch and Spencer was assisting the brunette with her Chemistry homework. Aria listened intently as she watched Spencer guide her through the problem, slowly understanding how to solve it. "So, you can cancel out grams, and then moles of Aluminum, which leaves moles of electrons. 137 divided by 27 would be 5.074, I believe, multiplied by 3 would equal 15.22 moles of electrons, which is your final answer."
"Okay that's what it was, I kept multiplying instead of dividing. Thanks Spence, it makes a lot more sense now. I just have one more question I think," Aria told her as she flipped through her Chemistry textbook once more. Spencer smiled as a feeling of accomplishment fell over her from knowing she had been able to successfully help her friend. "This one right here, how would you measure the volume of carbon dioxide?"
Spencer quickly read over the question a few times, gathering all the information that had been provided for it, and as she was about to give the petite girl an explanation, her attention was caught by the sound of loud footsteps approaching them at an alarmingly swift pace. Both girls heard it at the same time and looked away from each other towards the source of the sound to see Hanna running up to the table. Spencer raised an eyebrow as she and Aria exchanged looked of perplexity, both of them confused as to why Hanna seemed so flustered. The blonde quickly approached their table and as soon as she stood in front of them, she slammed a piece of paper on the table and began to try and catch her breath.
"You…" Hanna began, but stopped immediately as she inhaled deeply, struggling to catch her breath. Spencer and Aria looked at each other once more, trying to keep straight faces, as they still had no idea what was wrong with the blonde.
"Are you okay, Han?" Aria questioned, genuinely concerned. Hanna placed both hands on the table in front of her, panting more and more as he ran her fingers through her hair.
"Yeah Han I don't think I've ever seen you run before. What's going on?" Spencer questioned as she nudged her bottle of water over to the girl, gesturing for her to drink some. Hanna took the bottle in her hands, struggling to open it.
"Y-you… you were," Hanna stuttered as she breathed out deeply, fumbling with the cap of the water bottle. Spencer grinned at the girl, biting her lip to control her laughter.
"Come on, Han. Sound it out," Spencer joked, finding a ton of amusement in the blonde's struggle. Finally Hanna got the bottle of water open and brought it up to her lips, taking a few sturdy gulps before placing the bottle back on the table, taking one more deep breath.
"You were nominated," Hanna explained. Spencer narrowed her eyes in confusion, to which the blonde immediately picked up on. She took the piece of paper that she had brought to the table and flipped it over before nudging it closer to the hockey player for her to read. "This is the Yearbook Committee's first draft of superlative nominations. You and Emily were nominated for best couple."
Aria let out a squeal and snatched the piece of paper off of the table, immediately going down the list to see the other categories that were on the list. Spencer let out a sigh and rolled her eyes.
"Great," Spencer let out sarcastically as she leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms over her chest. Hanna gave her a look of confusion and came around the table, sitting down next to the brunette.
"We're all nominated for at least one thing. Hanna for best style, Emily and Spencer for most athletic, me for most artistic, Spencer again for most likely to succeed…" Aria started to list off.
"Spence this is huge! Not only are you guys like the favored couple to win, you're the only same sex couple nominated this year, and the first ever same sex couple to ever be nominated in general. Why aren't you more excited?" Hanna questioned. She watched as a look of confliction came over the brunette's face as she furrowed her eyebrows in thought.
"Oh my god, me and Spencer were nominated for best dynamic duo, and Hanna and Emily were nominated too," Aria squealed, talking to herself at this point.
"No you're right, Han. This is a huge feat for everyone in the Rosewood LGBT community, and I'm honoured that I get to be part of making history. It's just..." Spencer's voice trailed as she looked down and away from her friends. Hanna leaned in closer, trying to catch the brunette's gaze. After a few moments of silence, Spencer finally looked up once more, her eyes red as she tried to hold back tears. "Do you think Emily would ever cheat on me?"
Upon hearing the words that came from her best friend, Aria dropped the sheet of paper that she was looking at, her full attention immediately shifting towards her best friend. Her eyes narrowed at Spencer, partly in disbelief but also in confusion.
"I'm sorry, can you repeat that?" Aria asked, still shocked at the words that came out of the girl's mouth.
"Emily literally worships the ground you walk on, Spence. Why would that thought even cross your mind?" Hanna questioned right after Aria. Spencer sighed and leaned forward, putting her elbows on the table and resting her face in her hands. She rubbed her eyes roughly, in part from exhaustion but also to catch the stray tears before they fell.
"I- I think Emily might be cheating on me with Alison," Spencer whispered out. Saying the words out loud was like a knife to the heart for the brunette. She had wanted to ignore it and deny it, but she knew that she needed to face her problems instead of avoid them. Aria raised her eyebrows, taken aback yet again by what Spencer was saying.
"Spence that's a pretty heavy accusation to throw around. I mean what proof do you even have that could possibly make you think she's cheating on you?" Aria questioned.
"Last week Emily told me that she had gone home to take a nap before we were supposed to hang out together, so I went to the library. I was on my way home, and I saw her with Alison. So I texted her and asked her if she was free and she lied to me. She said she had just woken up, but I saw her with Alison. And they looked particularly friendly," Spencer explained. Aria and Hanna looked at each other, both perplexed with the situation.
"Well… Maybe Emily was asking for Alison's help to surprise you with something," Hanna offered, trying to think of any possible explanation for what Spencer had seen. The brunette gave Hanna a weak and hesitant smile as she shook her head, knowing that the blonde's suggestion couldn't be correct.
"I saw Alison kiss her," Spencer whispered out. Aria and Hanna's eyes bulged out at the same time, completely shocked by what the brunette had just revealed.
"I'm sorry, she did what?" Aria questioned, still not believing it. Spencer let out a deep sigh as she ran her fingers through her hair.
"Last week after Emily lied to me, I kind of started following her whenever she would say she was going home," Spencer confessed.
"Really, Spence?" Hanna questioned incredulously. Spencer sighed and nodded her head.
"I know I shouldn't have, but I couldn't help it. And in my defense, every single time she said she was going home to do homework or nap or whatever, she was with Alison. It was like clockwork, she would come home, go inside, wait 10 minutes and then Alison would be at her door. They would leave for a couple of hours, and then Ali would drop her off. And then yesterday Ali dropped Emily off and walked her to her door. They hugged, and then right before she left, Alison kissed Emily on the forehead," Spencer explained. Hanna rolled her eyes and shook her head at the brunette's words.
"It was on the forehead, Spence. That doesn't count," Hanna argued, thinking the brunette was blowing things out of proportion. Aria nodded her head in agreement, also thinking that Spencer was reading too much into the situation.
"Hanna's right, Spence. On the forehead isn't a big deal," Aria reasoned. Spencer shook her head in disagreement as she drank from her water bottle.
"All due respect guys, how often does a girl kiss another girl anywhere as a friendly gesture?" Spencer questioned. Aria and Hanna looked at one another, both still thinking that the lanky brunette was overreacting.
"Spencer, you're forgetting that Alison is straight. So whatever she was doing, I'm sure it was platonic," Hanna reasoned, Aria nodding in agreement with the blonde.
"Except for the fact that Alison admitted to me that she used to have feelings for Emily," Spencer snapped. Hanna narrowed her eyes in confusion as Aria raised her eyebrows, leaning back in shock. Spencer sighed and brought her hands to her head, massaging her temple as she stressed more and more. "Yeah. She told me that she used to have feelings for Emily, so I think my assumption is fair."
Spencer sighed once more and leaned back in her chair, her head in her hands as she rubbed her eyes in exhaustion. Aria and Hanna looked at each other once more, having a silent conversation, as neither of them knew how to approach the situation. Hanna looked at Aria and nodded her head over to Spencer, trying to tell her to deal with the situation while Aria shook her head, nodding her head over as though to tell Hanna the exact same thing. The two went back and forth for a few moments before finally, Aria rolled her eyes and put her hand on Spencer's arm, trying to take it away from her face.
"Look Spence, you can't keep sneaking around and doing this to yourself. Whether it's cheating or something else, Emily is lying to you and you need to confront her about it rather than sneaking around. Communication is always the best key in a relationship, and if you can't trust each other then you might as well not be in one. So just talk to her. But honestly, I can assure you there's another explanation behind it. Emily loves you more than anything, so don't be so quick to jump to conclusions, okay?" Aria told the girl. Spencer looked down at her hands, fiddling with them nervously as she reflected on the petite girl's words. Finally, she sighed and nodded in agreement.
"You're right, I'll talk to her," Spencer agreed as she stood from her chair. "I have to go. Thanks for the talk, I'll see you guys later."
The two girls smiled at Spencer, giving her their goodbyes before Spencer threw her bag over her shoulder and walked away towards the hallway to her locker.
The rest of the day went by excruciatingly slowly for Spencer. Anything that could've possibly gone wrong for the brunette had gone wrong, and it was beginning to take a toll on the girl. She had lost the file for her AP History paper, which meant she had to redo the 10-page essay before Monday. Her AP Chemistry lab partner accidentally mixed the incorrect chemicals while they were doing an experiment, and it got all over her textbook, ruining it. Her leg had been acting up on her so she couldn't even get her after school work out in – the only thing that might have actually made her day better. And to top it all off, Emily had once again texted her with an excuse to go home straight after school. The swimmer had bailed on her yet another Thursday in a row, and Spencer was getting fed up of it. She made her way to her locker, wanting to gather her books as quickly as possible so she could go home.
"Spencer!" a voice called from the distance. Not in the mood to talk to anyone, Spencer ignored it as she quickened her stride as much as her leg would possibly allow her to.
"Spence!" the voice got louder, this time Spencer recognizing it. Upon hearing the sound of Alison's voice, she really knew that she couldn't let herself turn around. Her entire afternoon had been terrible, and Spencer knew that if Alison said the wrong thing, her anger would get the best of her. Spencer was now limping at a full speed, trying her best to lose the blonde in the crowd of people that filled the hallways. She hadn't heard the voice anymore, so the brunette had assumed that she had successfully lost her until she felt a tug at her arm. "Spence, I said wait up."
Spencer closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, trying to calm herself down as much as she possibly could before turning around to greet the blonde. She put on a fake smile, trying to look as happy as she possibly could when she came face to face with Alison.
"Hey, sorry I must not have heard you. I was in a rush," Spencer lied. She turned and continued to walk towards her locker, the blonde now following in tow.
"That's okay. I'm sorry to bother you, but I was wondering if you might be able to help me with my Spanish and Bio. Ever since I passed my exams, it's been a pain the ass to try and keep up with all of the schoolwork and those ones are giving me the most trouble," Alison explained. Spencer bit her tongue to stop herself from immediately snapping at the girl. Helping Alison with anything was probably one of the last things she wanted to do in that moment. And even though she did have the time to do it, she was just bitter and didn't want to offer her assistance with anything.
"Sorry Ali, but I didn't take Spanish, I took French. And as for your Bio, I'd help you but I've actually been swamped with my own homework lately so I don't think I'll be able to," Spencer lied once again. The part about not taking Spanish had been true, but she had a slough of time she could have spared for the blonde. The only issue was, well, she just didn't want to. In that moment, she couldn't have cared less if Alison flunked every single one of her courses.
"That's okay then," Alison stated with a smile as they approached Spencer's locker together. "Maybe I'll just ask Emily for help, I know she took Spanish."
"Of course you would," Spencer muttered out, not able to bite her tongue. Alison quirked her eyebrow as she stepped forward and leaned on the lockers beside Spencer's looking at her as the brunette avoided eye contact, trying to gather her books. Alison could tell that Spencer was trying to act increasingly nonchalant, as though she hadn't said what she did. It only made Alison want to push the subject even more.
"Why would you say that?" the blonde questioned, following Spencer's eyes as the brunette still had yet to maintain eye contact with her. Spencer focused on grabbing the rest of her books, refusing to acknowledge the blonde's question until finally Alison put her hand on the hockey player's, stopping her from reaching for another textbook. "Spencer, why did you say that?"
Instead of replying to the blonde, Spencer rolled her eyes and removed her arm from Alison's grasp, taking her last textbook and putting it in her bag before she slammed her locker door and began to walk in the other direction. It was easier for her to just walk away from the situation rather than put up a façade. She knew that she was reaching her breaking point, and another word from Alison would push her over the edge. Spencer quickened her pace, needing to distance herself from the girl, but as she made her way towards the parking lot she once again felt someone grab hold of her arm, spinning her around. Finally having enough, it was as though the dam had broken and all of Spencer's built up anger and frustration was about to flood out.
"What do you want, Ali?!" Spencer snapped the moment she made eye contact with the blonde. Alison jumped back and narrowed her eyes at her friend, completely thrown aback at the girl's reaction. She had absolutely no idea why she was getting hit with Spencer's hostility, but she wasn't going to take it.
"I want to talk, Spencer. What the hell did I do to piss you off?" Alison questioned, her arms crossed, as the two stood face to face, neither backing down. Spencer rolled her eyes as she ran her fingers through her hair before crossing her arms over her chest.
"Why the hell couldn't you have just stayed away? Why couldn't you let me just have ONE thing to myself for once?" Spencer questioned. Alison's look changed to one of complete confusion as her eyebrows furrowed with her eyes squinted just slightly.
"Okay you're seriously going to have to elaborate because I have no clue what the hell you're talking about right now," Alison snapped back. Spencer rolled her eyes, finding it ridiculous that Alison was playing dumb with her. It was an insult that the blonde was even trying to pretend as though she'd done nothing wrong.
"You know, you've been back for a month and I'm already really tired of your shit. Grow up already," Spencer spat out as she tried to push past Ali, having had enough of the girl for one day. But Alison was never one to stand down from a Hastings/DiLaurentis showdown. She quickened her stride, stepping in front of the brunette and stopping her dead in her tracks.
"Seriously, Spencer what the hell is your damn issue with me?" Alison snapped, not playing around anymore. "I've done nothing wrong, so what is your god damn problem?"
"My problem?! My PROBLEM?!" Spencer snapped. In that moment, Spencer knew there was no turning back. She was completely done with Alison. Spencer stepped forward, getting right in Alison's face as she gave the blonde a menacing glare. "My problem is that you're the same conniving bitch you always were. My problem is that you're never going to change, and I'm ashamed of myself for ever thinking otherwise."
"Spencer, I would really appreciate it if you'd at least explain why you're being such a bitch right now," Alison snapped back, clenching her jaw as she tried to hide the fact that Spencer's words had hit her pretty hard. Spencer rolled her eyes, letting out a sarcastic laugh as she glared at the blonde.
"You kissed her Alison. You fucking KISSED her. Did you think I wouldn't find that out?" Spencer asked as she squinted her eyes at the girl in anger. Alison furrowed her eyebrows, giving the brunette a look of bewilderment.
"W-what? What are you talking about? You mean in the barn? Christ, Spencer that was a fucking year ago, and you weren't even dating yet! You have no right to be mad at me when I didn't even know you had feelings for her yet," Alison argued. Spencer's eyes went wide in shock of the blonde's revelation.
"B-barn?" Spencer whispered out, her voice coated in hurt and confusion.
"Yeah, when I pulled her out of that stupid barn. That's what you're talking about, right?" Alison asked, genuinely confused with the situation. Spencer's jaw clenched as she balled her fists in anger. She was visibly shaking, and in that moment Alison could tell that she had screwed up. Before she could realize what was going on, Spencer spun on her heel in the opposite direction of the blonde. Alison muttered a string of profanity, knowing that she unintentionally had revealed too much, so she once again went after Spencer and pulled her arm to get the girl to face her once again. "Spencer wait, let's just talk about this."
"Just back the fuck off for once!" Spencer snapped as she pulled her arm away from the blonde.
"It's not what you think Spencer, please you have to believe me," Alison pleaded. Spencer rolled her eyes upon hearing the girl's words, sick and tired of listening to Alison's excuses.
"Since when have you ever been anything but a lying, scheming bitch? You don't change, Alison. Never have, never will," Spencer told her. She shoved past Alison, their elbows brushing against each other harshly as Spencer walked away, only this time Alison didn't go after her. She knew that her friend's words were being spoken out of anger and spite, but they didn't hurt any less. And as much as Alison wanted to go after Spencer and clear the air, she knew that until Spencer talked to Emily, the two would be at odds.
Spencer sat at her study desk, re-writing the remainder of her AP History essay. She had spent two hours trying to recover the file, but was only able to obtain the first three pages she had written before giving up. After her fight with Alison the brunette had decided the best outlet to channel her anger was her schoolwork, so the moment she got down she buried herself in it, completely blocking out everything from the outside world. For the last three hours, Spencer had been furiously typing away and was now only a few paragraphs away from completing her paper, when she heard the door to her barn open.
Immediately, Spencer froze as she inhaled the scent that filled the room, knowing that her girlfriend had just walked through the doors. She silently cursed herself for giving Emily a key to the barn; in that moment, aside from Alison, Emily was the last person she wanted to face. Instead of greeting the swimmer, Spencer shook her head slightly and continued typing on the keyboard. She could hear Emily put her bag down, the girl's footsteps getting closer and closer to her until she felt a pair of arms lace around her waist, soft lips touching her cheek. Spencer froze once more before shrugging away from her girlfriend's hold and continuing to type.
"Spence, it's me," Emily spoke, thinking that the brunette shrugged away from her unintentionally. She went to try and kiss the lanky girl again, but Spencer moved away once more, causing Emily to furrow her eyebrows in confusion. "Hey what's wrong, baby?"
Initially, Spencer wasn't going to bring up her concerns with their relationship until after their weekend away together. Even though she was confused and concerned with why her girlfriend had been lying to her, she knew that Emily needed the weekend away to relax and regroup. But after her fight with Alison, she knew that she couldn't hold it in any longer. Spencer let out a deep sigh and stopped typing before she pushed her chair back and stood up from her chair, crossing her arms defensively as she looked at her confused girlfriend.
"Why didn't you tell me that Alison kissed you when she pulled you out of that barn?" Spencer asked, her voice small. As soon as the question left her lips and she saw the reaction on Emily's face, she knew it to be true. The swimmer sighed, biting her lip hesitantly.
"How'd you find out?" Emily questioned, shifting in her spot as she ran her fingers through her hair nervously. Spencer closed her eyes, shaking her head as she felt her heartbeat quicken.
"So it really is true," Spencer let out, her voice a soft whisper as she tried not to cry. Emily took a step closer and reached out to try and make contact with her girlfriend, but Spencer immediately stepped back, holding up her hand and gesturing the girl to not step any closer. The swimmer sighed, dropping her own hand before stepping back and giving Spencer her space.
"Look Spence, I didn't tell you because I wanted to protect your feelings. It was a long time ago, it meant nothing, and I was so out of it that for a while I didn't even know whether or not it was real," Emily admitted. Spencer quirked an eyebrow at the girl as she felt her jaw begin to clench.
"Okay, so then when did you find out that it was in fact real?" Spencer questioned, her anger rising. Emily let out a deep sigh while looking to the floor, averting her gaze away from the brunette.
"Last month, first day back at school," Emily whispered out shamefully. Spencer felt her eyes widen as her jaw dropped slightly. Her hands balled into fists as tears of anger filled her eyes. But she didn't want to let herself cry; she couldn't.
"You've known for a month and you didn't tell me? A fucking month?!" Spencer spat out, her voice slightly rising out of anger. She could see the look of regret on Emily's face, but it didn't faze her; she was pissed. "So is that what sparked your guys' sneaking around, or are we just going to pretend like that's not happening either?"
"What are you talking about?" Emily asked, furrowing her eyebrows at the brunette's words. Spencer rolled her eyes in irritation; she was tired of Emily and Alison acting as though they were completely innocent.
"I saw you and Alison sneaking around with each other! Not once, not twice, but every single time you've bailed on me to 'go home and nap'," Spencer spoke; using an air quotes hand gesture to reiterate her point. Emily's jaw dropped as she now also sported a look of anger.
"Have you been spying on me?" Emily questioned, her voice dripping in anger and hurt. But Spencer refused to let it get to her.
"Yeah, I have been. And I can't believe that you didn't at least have the decency to break up with me before jumping back into Ali's arms," Spencer shot back at the girl. Emily let out a dry, sarcastic laugh as soon as she heard the accusation that came from her girlfriend.
"Do you really think I would cheat on you? Seriously, Spencer?" Emily questioned, disbelievingly. After everything that the two girls had been though, it hurt her to think Spencer would make such an insane assumption.
"I saw it with my own eyes, Emily. You guys were pretty damn close. She kissed you on the forehead. Friends don't act like that," Spencer pointed out. Emily shook her head and rolled her eyes, frustrated at the situation that was currently unfolding. She looked Spencer in the eye and exhaled deeply.
"I'm not cheating on you, Spencer," Emily spoke, her voice slightly quivering as she felt herself getting more and more upset. Spencer could hear the genuineness in the swimmer's voice, and it broke her heart. Her girlfriend was standing in front of her, honesty written all over her face and yet Spencer couldn't look her in the eye. She dropped her head, averting her gaze as she looked to the floor.
"I don't believe you," Spencer whispered, swallowing loudly as she tried to stop herself from crying. Emily closed her eyes momentarily, hurt from the brunette's confession. A tear fell from the swimmer's eyes but she wiped it away angrily, hating that she couldn't keep her emotions in check.
"Well when you stop acting like a fucking child, come and find me. Until then, don't talk to me," Emily spat out, not giving Spencer any opportunity to retort as she stormed out of the room, slamming the barn door loudly. Spencer buried her face in her hands, a muffled yell coming from them as she screamed out in frustration. She was angry, hurt, frustrated, but most of all she was confused. She knew when Emily was telling the truth, and she could tell that there was some honesty to Emily's words when she stated that she hadn't been cheating on her. But Spencer saw it with her own eyes and she knew something was going on. Pacing around the room, Spencer contemplated what her options were for the situation. She didn't want to forgive Emily; she knew that her anger was in some ways completely justifiable; regardless of whether or not it was cheating, Emily was lying to her in some way. But at the same time, all Spencer really wanted was the truth. Realizing that she wouldn't be able to have a mature conversation until she knew the truth, Spencer made her way to the barn door, putting her coat on before she made her way to the house of the only person she could get answers from – Alison.
Spencer stormed over to Alison's house, not having any sort of game plan in mind. The closer she got to the blonde's porch, the more she felt the residual anger rise in her. If she were to summarize her day, it would be absolute shit; and everything that had gotten to Spencer throughout the day had been bubbling to the surface as she made her way up the sidewalk to Alison's door.
There was one light that illuminated in the darkness of the night and it came from Alison's bedroom window, which let Spencer know that the blonde was home for sure; Alison never let anyone else in her room. Letting out a deep sigh, Spencer walked up the steps of the DiLaurentis porch and placed a firm knock on the front door. She waited a few moments, not getting an answer before she backed up and looked at Alison's window, still seeing the light on. Spencer narrowed her eyes in irritation and came up to the door again, knocking even louder this time.
"Alison, open the door!" Spencer yelled out, not paying any regard to the fact that the blonde's family might have been home too. Her knocking became more and more harsh, and she was no longer pausing in between. The banging had gotten loud and consistent, until finally the front door swung open and Alison stood in front of her. Upon seeing Spencer at her front door, Alison rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest.
"Great. To what do I owe the pleasure?" Alison questioned sarcastically. Spencer raised her eyebrow at the blonde's attitude, crossing her own arms over her chest defensively. If Alison wanted to play bitch, Spencer could do the exact same thing.
"Well see I figured we should probably get better acquainted with one another, y'know, considering we're apparently sharing a girlfriend now," Spencer snapped back. Alison rolled her eyes once more, shaking her head at the comment Spencer had just made.
"Lovely, Emily warned me that this might happen," Alison spoke.
"Oh of course she did, I mean since you're fucking her behind my back I'm sure fair warning was the least she could give you," Spencer snapped.
"For the last time Spencer, I'm not sleeping with her!" Alison yelled out, having had enough of the stupid back and forth game that Spencer was trying to play with her.
"Then what the fuck are you doing?! Tell me Ali because I swear to god I'm about two seconds away from breaking up with her and breaking your neck," Spencer threatened, as she got closer to Alison's face. The blonde closed her eyes in frustration, knowing that things would never get better until the truth was out. She stepped back and pushed her door open more, gesturing for Spencer to come inside. The brunette shook with anger at Alison's gesture, momentarily contemplating whether or not she could handle being inside with the blonde. After having a brief internal debate, Spencer rolled her eyes and pushed past Alison, standing in the foyer of her house but refusing to go any further. Alison closed the door behind the girl, running her fingers through her hair as she stepped in front of the hockey player, the two standing in silence.
"Look Spencer I understand that you think you've got it all figured out, but you're wrong. I'm not sleeping with Emily. She would never cheat on you, and I would never pursue her in that way to begin with. But that doesn't mean I don't care about her. So I'm going to tell you what's been going on, but you have to promise me that when I tell you, you're 100 percent by her side and supportive because I swear to God if you're not, you answer to me. Got it?" Alison asked. Spencer took in the blonde's words and immediately nodded in agreement at the blonde's demand. Alison let out a deep breath before continuing. "It all started a few weeks ago…"
Flashback
Alison stepped out of The Brew with a latte in hand, the first one she'd had since coming back to Rosewood. It was a small victory for the blonde and even though it didn't seem like a big deal, it was also a step towards getting her life back in order. Standing at the edge of the sidewalk, Alison cautiously began to cross the street towards her parked vehicle when something familiar caught her eye. The closer she came to her car, the closer the recognizable figure came too. Alison squinted her eyes down the alleyway, her suspicions confirmed as she saw Emily talking to an unrecognizable man. She ducked down behind her car, watching the exchange between the two and her eyes bulged when she saw the man hand her something in exchange for money. Alison remained hidden, waiting for the two to part ways, and as Emily made her way back towards the sidewalk, Alison came around her car and met the girl face to face, stopping her dead in her tracks. Emily stopped, eyes widening as she stepped back and ran her fingers through her hair nervously.
"H-Hey Alison, didn't see you there. Where'd you come from?" Emily questioned, the fear evident in her voice. Alison grabbed hold of the raven-haired girl's arm, pulling her closer so that she was the only one in earshot.
"I think I should be asking you the same thing. What the hell were you doing with that guy?" Alison whispered out harshly. Emily shrugged her arm away from the girl and turned to walk away but Alison was too quick, and was back in her face in an instant. "Don't walk away from me, Em. I want to know what's going on and I want to know right now."
"It's nothing Alison, just let it go," Emily pleaded, a look of desperation in her eyes. But Alison couldn't. She knew that whatever Emily was doing couldn't be very safe if she had to do it in a dark alley, away from prying eyes. Before Emily could process what was happening, Alison reached into her coat pocket, taking out the item she had just purchased. Emily reached out for it, but it was too late. "Give it back, Ali!"
"You've got to be kidding me Em! Drugs?!" Alison snapped, looking at the white pills in the plastic bag she had just snatched from the swimmer. She threw her latte into a garbage can nearby before grabbing Emily's arm and pulling her towards her vehicle. "Get in. Now."
Knowing that she had no choice, Emily complied to Alison's demands, getting into the passenger side of her car as the blonde walked around her car and got into the driver's seat. Once the doors were closed, Alison locked them and then turned to the swimmer who was now fidgeting nervously with her coat sleeves, staring forward as she couldn't make eye contact with the girl anymore. The two sat in silence for a few minutes, Alison looking at the girl as she waited patiently for her to explain herself.
"Please give them back, Ali. I need them," Emily whispered out.
"What are they Emily? Ecstasy? Oxycontin? Cocaine? Percocets? Vicodin? This shit is dangerous, Em! What the hell are you thinking?" Alison yelled out. Emily's lip quivered as tears began to stream from her eyes. She shook her head at Alison's words, furiously wiping the tears away, but the more she wiped them away the more they kept coming.
"It's not like that Alison," Emily stated softly as she continued to wipe her tears. Upon seeing how upset the swimmer was, Alison's resolve immediately softened. She put the bag of pills on her dashboard and put her arm on Emily's, rubbing it supportively.
"Then what is it, Em?" Alison asked softly. Emily closed her eyes and inhaled slowly to calm herself down, her hand twitching against her leg. She wiped the tears from her eyes and cleared her throat before turning to face Alison.
"They're proplus caffeine pills. I've been using them to stay awake. Every time I close my eyes I see Madison's face, standing over Spencer, and s-she… She's killing her. It gets worse and worse every time I fall asleep," Emily admitted as she started crying again. Alison looked at the girl, not knowing what to say. "I had a panic attack the other night and I've been afraid to sleep, and I don't know what to do. The panic attacks are getting worse, and now the smallest things are setting me off."
"Like what?" Alison asked softly. Emily wiped her tears and shrugged.
"Little things like sudden loud noises and bright lights. It's like I hear a locker door slam and I can hear the gun shot all over again," Emily explained.
"Did… Did you ever think about talking to someone about it?" Alison asked gently. Emily looked up at the blonde in anger, her eyebrows furrowed.
"I'm not crazy, Alison. I don't need a shrink," Emily snapped.
"I don't think you're crazy, Em. Seeing a therapist is completely normal; they're trained to get to the root of the problem and fix it. I mean, my parents made me see one after everything that happened because I get nightmares too. But having a therapist to talk to really helps," Alison admitted.
"I don't know, Ali…" Emily trailed off, a look of skepticism. Alison put her hand on the girl's shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze.
"Honestly, you should consider it. Those pills are dangerous, Em. What are you going to tell Spencer? You know she's going to find out one way or another," Alison reminded the girl. As soon as her girlfriend's name came up Emily felt her heartbeat pick up, her fingers now twitching intensely.
"N-no Ali you can't tell anyone, especially Spencer. P-Please, I can't burden her with this too. She's gonna leave me," Emily cried out as she clenched her chest. Panic set in as Emily's heart began to race, a sharp pain racing through her chest. She began to gasp for air, and Alison could immediately tell that a panic attack was about to set in.
"Em, breathe and relax. In and out," Alison instructed as she began to breathe with her. The raven-haired girl clenched at her chest while trying to mimic Alison's instructions, tears sliding down her face. Her heartbeat began to slow down and the two girls breathed in unison until finally Emily had calmed down. "Spencer loves you, Emily. She would never leave you because of this."
"You can't guarantee that, Ali. You just can't," Emily spoke as she shook her head.
"I see the way that Spencer looks at you, Em. I can guarantee it. But you need to get help Emily. Otherwise this thing will destroy you," Alison told the girl. "Look, I go to therapy two times a week, sometimes three. If you're feeling uncomfortable, you can come and sit in on some of my sessions just to see what it's like; maybe even talk to my therapist about it."
"Really?" Emily questioned. Alison smiled and nodded in agreement. The swimmer sat in her spot, contemplating her decision for a few minutes before finally letting out a deep breath and nodding. "Okay I'll come on one condition. Please don't tell Spencer. Please."
End of flashback
"We've been going to therapy together for the past few weeks, Spencer. That's why we're always together after school; we go to the same office. She would never in a million years even think of cheating on you," Alison spoke out. Spencer put her head in her hands, rubbing her eyes in frustration, as she knew she had screwed up.
"Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck! Ugh, I was such a bitch to her! And to you," Spencer admitted, taking her hands off of her face to look Alison in the eye. The brunette had half expected Alison to have a smug look on her face, as both of them knew how much Spencer had screwed up. But she didn't have even a hint of arrogance on her face; she was genuinely concerned. "I'm so sorry Alison. I said some horrible things to you."
"Please, you've said worse to me for less, Spencer. It shouldn't be me you're apologizing to, it should be Emily." Alison reminded her. Spencer exhaled deeply as she nodded in agreement.
"You're right. I've gotta go find her. Thank you, not only for taking care of her but also for telling me. I know you probably broke a promise by doing that, so I'm sorry. And sorry again for all of the horrible things I said to you," Spencer spoke. Alison smiled and pulled the lanky girl into a brief hug before letting her go.
"It's fine Spence. Now go, she's probably waiting for you," Alison encouraged. The two girls shared one more smile before Spencer turned and walked out of the DiLaurentis house, running back to her own home and getting into her car so that she could go find her girl.
Spencer had been driving around for 45 minutes, trying to find her girlfriend. She checked the library, the Fields' house; she had called both Aria and Hanna, but still she couldn't find her. After sitting in her car for a few moments, racking her brain to think of any other places the girl could be, Spencer found herself sitting outside of Rosewood High. Her car was parked right next to her girlfriend's, and Spencer knew that she had to be in the natatorium. At this point, the brunette was outside trying to prepare herself for the impending conversation that was about to happen with her girlfriend. She knew that she'd screwed up, and didn't know how to go about fixing it. After about 20 minutes of contemplation, Spencer sighed and exited her car, making her way inside.
Spencer approached the natatorium door, looking through it to see Emily sitting at the edge of the pool, her toes dangling inside as she was furiously jotting down notes. It was clear that Emily was working on more ideas for the swim team, and Spencer took a few moments to admire the beauty of the water's reflection shimmering on her girlfriend before she opened the door and entered. Emily made no effort to look up from her work even after hearing the door open, so Spencer quietly made her way over to the girl, kicking off her shoes and sitting down beside the swimmer. The two sat in silence as Emily continued to jot down notes, not even sparing a glance at the brunette. Finally deciding that the silence was becoming overwhelming, Spencer sighed and put her hand on Emily's, trying to get her to stop writing.
"Ali told me what was going on. I'm sorry, Em. I was a jerk, and I was out of line," Spencer stated sincerely. Emily sighed and pulled her hand away from Spencer's, taking her pen and notebook and putting it down before looking up at the brunette.
"You accused me of cheating on you, Spencer. How could you think that low of me?" Emily asked, genuinely hurt.
"I know and I'm so—"
"You didn't even let me explain, Spencer. You didn't even believe me!" Emily let out, her voice slightly louder now.
"Because you lied to me! You kept lying to me and you were sneaking around with someone you used to be in love with instead of coming to me! How do you think that made me feel?!" Spencer defended.
"I was scared, Spencer! I didn't tell you because I was scared and I wasn't ready. At first I was afraid because I thought you were going to leave me. But then I realized that my fear was because if I told people, it would make it real, not because I didn't trust you. You're the one who didn't trust me," Emily told the girl. She felt the tears well in her eyes, letting them fall freely as she wasn't afraid to let her girlfriend see her cry. "When you came over earlier I was ready to tell you. I pictured us talking it out and then you'd hold me and tell me everything was going to be okay. But then you started throwing out all of these accusations and I was shocked and hurt. God Spencer if we can't even communicate now, how the hell are we going to do long distance?"
"I don't know what to say Emily. I'm sorry, okay? I'm so sorry," Spencer let out, her voice now cracking as she tried not to cry, wanting to be strong for Emily.
"If you were sorry, you never would have said it in the first place," Emily spoke. Spencer reached out to take Emily in her arms but the swimmer shrugged away, standing up from her spot and gathering all of her belongings. "Maybe there's no use in even trying long distance."
"You don't mean that," Spencer spoke, immediately standing up and coming face to face with the swimmer. But as she saw the look on the girl's face, she knew that Emily was being serious.
"Maybe we should just put an end to things now and get used to not being in each other's lives anymore. Because clearly you don't trust me, and without trust our relationship means nothing."
And there it was. Those words shattered Spencer's world in the blink of an eye. But she wouldn't let her walk away. Not just yet. As tears spilt from her eyes, just thinking of their relationship fading away, Spencer turned around once again, watching the swimmer leave. But as she turned, Spencer found herself at a loss for words. As much as she wanted and needed to say something, anything to make the girl stay, she couldn't. Instead she watched as her best friend and lover walked away, tears falling as Spencer felt her heart break a million times. She was gone.
So there it is, I hope you liked it and I apologize for any grammatical or spelling errors. I didn't have a ton of time to go back and edit, so there might be a slough of those bad boys. Anyways leave your feedback, good or bad if it's a review or suggestion or request - anything really - you guys know I love reading it. Whether it's a PM or review I'd love to hear from everyone. Thank you for reading!