ok so the last chapter was as far as stephanie Meyer got on midnight sun . so from now on im on my own writing from Elsa's Pov . idk how I did but you guys can tell me that I'm kinda nervous about what you will think. but read enjoy and review tell me how I did :)

I was still tense when I climbed into Anna's window that night. Carlisle had assured me that the Quileautes would do nothing to upset the treaty and that I shouldn't worry. But I couldn't help myself. Technically speaking, Anna already knew of the treaty, so it wouldn't entirely be breaking the rules for the grandson of Ephraim Black to say anything to her. I was grateful David had been only seconds from arriving home when I had left, that would hopefully have kept any conversations to a general topic.

Anna slept soundly tonight, but she didn't speak. Her sleep was dreamless. I watched her and further formulated my plans for Saturday. As accustomed to her scent as I was becoming, it was still difficult. Especially here, in her room, where it clung to every surface. I would need to prepare for Saturday. I could only be so strong, after all. A hunting trip tomorrow would be necessary, to make sure I was fully prepared.

I soaked in every moment of the evening. Anna's face, so peaceful, was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. She was the most beautiful thing in this world. Alice's visions would not come true. Saturday would not end in sorrow. I wasn't sure if they would end happily either, but it would be a turning point for Anna and me. There were so few secrets between us now, it was time to rip back the curtain and lay everything bare.

When I got home that morning, Alice was waiting on the steps of the porch.

"What time are we leaving?" She asked me, smiling.

"We?" I raised an eyebrow.

"I thought you would like some company on your hunt." She shrugged.

I had to appreciate Alice for her support.

"After lunch," I replied. "We can take my car."

"Will I be picking up Anna's truck or will you?"

I laughed. "I'll do it."

She smiled and went inside. I was being selfish today, and she had already seen it. I still wanted my time with Anna, so I would still pick her up for school, even though I was leaving.

I drove with the windows rolled down, clearing my head of Anna's scent completely with the cool morning air. I wanted to test myself this morning. When I arrived at Anna's house, I waited, anxiously in the car.

She hurried out of the house and into the passenger seat, almost giddy. I grinned at her excitement, and her heart beat erratically in response. Her scent hit me hard, as I expected. Intoxicating and desirable, and yet, somehow, I was able to withstand it better than I had before. I was immensely pleased with myself.

"How did you sleep?" I asked, though I already knew the answer.

"Fine, thanks. How was your night?" She smiled up at me.

"Pleasant." If only she knew…

"Can I ask what you did?"

I watched you sleep, because you're absolutely beautiful when you sleep."No. Today is still mine."

As we drove to school I asked her about her mother; her name was Renée, she seemed to be a flighty person, flitting from one hobby to the next. I asked about her family, his Grandfather was named Michael, which was Anna's middle name.well Michelle a female version. The rest of the morning progressed much the same. She told me about the friends she had left behind in Phoenix, and then she flushed with embarrassment when I asked her about previous boys and girls she had dated.

"What's the matter?"

"It's nothing… I just…" She paused, and shifted uncomfortably. "I've never dated anyone."

"No one?" I asked, shocked. She was so eagerly pursued here in Forks, surely she had been similarly pursued in Phoenix. Certainly, she would have had more options to choose from.

"Nope, no one." She shrugged.

"So you never met anyone you wanted?" Was I the first? Truly? She had been the first person to catch my interest, could I be the first to catch hers? Surely she had at least desired someone, if not dated them.

"Well, that's really a different question, isn't it?" She teased. I felt a flare of jealousy at the very idea of her desiring anyone else. She sighed. "Not in Phoenix."

There was a relief for me in that, but it troubled me. She had never had another relationship before, and she had chosen me? A monster? That hardly seemed right.

My time with her was almost up. We were in the cafeteria now. She took a bite out of the bagel she was holding. I felt a surge of guilt and frustration with having to leave her.

"I should have let you drive yourself today," I said.

"Why?" She cocked her head to the side.

"I'm leaving with Alice after lunch." The guilt raged inside of me.

"Oh." She blinked a few times, seeming disappointed. That pleased me, at least. "That's okay, it's not that far of a walk."

Walk? Absurd. "I'm not going to make you walk home just because I was selfish today."

"How were you selfish?"

I might as well be honest with her. Honesty was becoming the theme of this week. "I knew I was leaving after lunch, and I still wanted to spend as much time with you this morning as I could. I should have let you drive myself." I looked down at her and grinned. "But I'm a horrifically selfish creature and I enjoy your presence too much." All understatements, but honest just the same.

"It's really okay, I don't mind walking." She said, blushing.

"I already told you, I'm not going to make you walk. We'll go get your truck and leave it here for you."

"I don't have my key with me," she sighed.

I remembered the last time she had driven her truck, and mused that her keys were either hanging somewhere in the house or in the pocket of the jeans she had been wearing that day. I remembered which pair it was, easily. "Your truck will be here, and the key will be in the ignition—" and then I laughed as a thought came to me. "Unless you're afraid someone might steal it."

"Hey, respect the truck." She pursed her lips, and looked thoughtful. She didn't think I'd be able to get her truck back to the school before she was done. I smirked, rising to her challenge.

"So where are you going?" She asked, always asking the wrong questions—the ones I didn't want to answer. But I was being honest this week.

"Hunting. I'm going to be alone with you tomorrow, I'm going to take whatever precautions I can." I decided to give her another chance to back out, though the very thought pained me beyond anything, a part of me hoped. "You can always cancel, you know."

She looked down, avoiding my eyes. "Nope," she whispered, stealing a glance back at me. "I can't."

Of all the answers she could have given me, this was possibly the worst. There was always a choice, no matter what. But there was a grain of truth in her statement, I knew. Because I felt the same way. I couldn't stay away from her any more than she could stay away from me. "Perhaps you're right."

"What time will I see you tomorrow?" She asked suddenly, her voice filled with excitement.

"That depends… It's a Saturday, don't you want to sleep in?" Humans liked sleeping in on Saturdays, didn't they?

"No," she said quickly, and then sighed. "Honestly, I'd like as much time with you outside of school as I can get."

I tried to restrain my smile, I shouldn't encourage this kind of behavior—it wasn't safe for her. "The same time as usual, then. Will David be there?" I wondered when it would be appropriate for me to meet her father.

"No, he's fishing tomorrow." She replied, clearly pleased with this fact.

That was bad. "And if you don't come home, what will he think?" Could she hear the warning of danger in my voice? Would she care? Probably not, knowing her.

"I have no idea," her voice was casual. "He knows I've been meaning to do the laundry. Maybe he'll think I fell in the washer."

I scowled at her casual answer and she scowled back, teasing me.

"What are you hunting tonight?" she asked after a moment.

How easily she asked the question, like I was going out to get food at a restaurant. "Whatever we find in the park. We aren't going far."

"Why are you going with Alice?"

"Alice is the most…" Exuberant, excited, "Supportive." I frowned.

"And the others? What are they?" Her, voice was nervous.

I didn't want to lie to her, but I didn't want to tell her about Royal's anger. Carlisle and Esme seemed pleased, but my siblings were a different story. I decided to be diplomatic. "Incredulous," I said, "for the most part." I added, thinking of Royal, specifically.

Then she turned her head and glanced at my family at their usual table, then back at me, her face morose. "They don't like me."

"That's not it," I argued, not wanting her to think that about herself. "They don't understand why I can't leave you alone."

She sighed. "Neither do I, for that matter."

I knew she didn't mean it like she was annoyed, simply that she failed to understand my love for her. It frustrated me beyond measure. "I told you—" I said, rolling my eyes to the ceiling, "You don't see yourself clearly at all. You're not like anyone I've ever known. You fascinate me." Another understatement.

Anna narrowed her eyes at me, questioning my answer.

I was pleased that I could read her expressions better and better every day. "Having the advantages I do, I have a better than average grasp of human nature." I tapped my forehead, gently. "People are predictable. But you… You never do what I expect. You always take me by surprise."

She blushed and looked away from me. Her eyes wandering behind her, again.

"That part is easy enough to explain," I continued, watching her. "But there's more… and it's not so easy to put into words—"

How could I explain my love for her? How could I put that into words? There were none that explained the depth of my feelings for her.

As I spoke, Royal turned his head in our direction. He heard what I was saying and his annoyance was rising steadily, but instead of meeting my eyes, he found Anna's.

I could see Anna's face in Royal's mind. The wide, confused blue eyes tinged with fear. Royal's mind was venomous toward Anna, and Anna was powerless to look away from Royal's furious glare. I snarled under my breath, just loud enough for Royal to hear and he quickly turned his head away. Anna's eyes snapped back to mine, still wide.

"I'm sorry about that. He's just worried. You see…" I paused for a moment, choosing my words carefully. "It's dangerous for more than just me if, after spending so much time with you so publicly…" I couldn't say the words, I dropped my eyes like a coward.

"If?" she prompted.

"If this ends… badly." How despicable I was to put her in this danger, to put my family in this danger. I was fighting to be strong, but what if I failed? I was far from perfect. I didn't have the perfect control that Carlisle did. I dropped my head into my hands, ashamed of myself.

After a moment, she spoke again. "And you have to leave now?"

"Yes." I looked up at her, wishing I didn't have to. Her expression was so disappointed that I couldn't help but smile—she was sad that I had to leave and while I didn't want her to be sad, it made me glad that she cared so strongly for me. "It's probably for the best." I made my voice lighter. "We still have fifteen minutes of that wretched movie left to endure in Biology—I don't think I could handle any more." Nor did I think I could resist that electricity between us another day, at least not without the fortification of a hunting trip.

She looked thoughtful for a moment, then jumped in surprise when Alice was suddenly by her side.

"Alice." I greeted her without looking away from her surprised face.

"Elsa." She nodded.Do I get to meet her now? I'll behave, I promise!

I smiled at Alice's enthusiasm. "Alice, Anna—Anna, Alice," I said, gesturing casually.

It's about time!"Hello, Anna." She smiled at her, "It's nice to finally meet you."No thanks to you, Elsa.

I glared at her, I was sure Anna didn't hear the subtle emphasis she put on the word finally—it was only for my benefit.

"Hi, Alice." Anna's answering smile was shy and utterly adorable.

"Are you ready?" Alice turned back to me.

"Nearly. I'll meet you at the car."

She's so cute!Alice thought as she walked away.

"Should I say 'have fun,' or is that the wrong sentiment?" Anna asked, turning back to me.

"No, 'have fun' works as well as anything."

"Have fun, then." She said, the disappointment still evident in her voice.

"I'll try." I was grinning at her tone. "And you try to stay safe, please."

"Safe in Forks—what a challenge." She deadpanned.

"For you itisa challenge." I said solemnly. "Promise."

"I promise to try to be safe," she recited like a child repeating a rule. "I'll do the laundry tonight—that ought to be fraught with peril."

"Don't fall in," I teased, remembering her words from earlier.

"I'll do my best, but I make no guarantees." She deadpanned, again.

I stood to leave, and she followed suit.

"I'll see you tomorrow," she sighed.

I'll see you sooner."It seems like a long time to you, doesn't it?"

She nodded, sadly.

"I'll be there in the morning." I promised with my most reassuring smile. I readied myself, controlling my movements, and reached across the table to lightly brush my finger along her cheekbone. Reveling in the burning sting of her skin. Anna's heartbeat become slightly louder. Pleased with myself, I turned and walked out of the cafeteria. Already counting the seconds until I would see her again.

Alice was waiting at the car for me. I climbed in and started the engine. She turned to me, her eyes exuberant.

"Did I behave myself well enough for you?"

I laughed. "Fine, except for your dig at me."

"That's your own fault for making me wait so long!" She retorted.

"And since when did you lack patience?" I rolled my eyes.

She stuck her little tongue out at me and I laughed again.

We reached Anna's house and I left the car running as I climbed out.

"You'll find them in the laundry room in a pair of jeans," Alice called. "At least that's where I saw you finding them."

I was right then, I knew which pair to look for.

Scaling the side of the house, I slipped in through Anna's window and looked for the laundry room. Finding it, I retrieved the keys quickly, dreading having to drive it back to the school given its monstrous speed limitations.

I went back to Anna's room to leave, pausing for a moment to inhale her exquisite scent one last time. A stack of blank paper sticking out of a partially open drawer in her desk caught my eye. I crossed the room and took a sheet and a pen from the same drawer, writing the words "be safe," on the page. I folded it in half and put it in my pocket. I would leave a note for her, something to think of me, to show my concern for her well-being. These were all things a normal, human girlfriend would do, right?

The drive back to the school was a grueling as I had imagined it would be. Moving at a glacial pace, I found myself regretting my promise to let Anna drive tomorrow. I could hear Alice's frustrated thoughts in my car behind me. I left her truck parked in the spot previously occupied by my car with the key in the ignition and placed the note on the drivers seat for her to find. If only a note could make her actually safe.

The hunt was largely uneventful. At first, only a few small game, though I lucked out and found a particularly aggressive mountain lion. Alice followed my lead, knowing it was more important that I hunted as much as possible. She spent the time flipping through various visions, directing us to our prey now and then.

"Alice?" I finally asked as we were finishing up for the night.

"You won't hurt her tomorrow," Alice said with confidence. "It will be difficult, but you'll do just fine."

"Just because you say it doesn't make it true, Alice, you can't hide your other visions from me, of all people." And it was true, her visions were more solid, less ephemeral, but tomorrow was still undecided. The course I was on, at this exact moment, was promising but things could change suddenly. In the blink of an eye, or between one precious heartbeat and the next, the constant reminders to me that Anna was more fragile than anything else in my world.

Feeling satisfied, if not overly full, from the hunt, it was time to head back. I was already eager to see Anna again. It was an aching need, different from the thirst. A need deep in my core; an altogether human need. I embraced it, reckless as it was, because it felt sohuman. Human was good. Human would keep Anna alive.

When I climbed into her bedroom window that night, the sound of Chopin'sNocturne in Db Majorwas playing softly from the old CD player near her bed, an open shoebox full of CDs on the floor. She was exceptionally still tonight as she slept, one arm across her chest, the other sprawled out above her. Her lips slightly parted, her red hair wild and curly, framing her pale face.

Even though I knew every detail of her, even though I could perfectly recall the image of her with ease, I recommitted it all to memory, knowing tomorrow could change everything. Tomorrow could make or destroy everything I was holding onto so carefully—everythingwewere holding on to so desperately. But I would not run away from Anna any longer, not as long as she wanted me. She would feel as if I were running away again.

The morning came all too quickly. I felt the anxiety rising in me as I ran home to change for the day. Would she still want me after today? If I presented her with more evidence of my inhuman nature? She had taken everything in stride so far—I had no reason to believe anything would scare her away at this point. Still, the fear was still present in the back of my mind, warring fiercely with the hope that she would run; that it would finally be a step too far. For her own good, I could let her run, couldn't I? That was the right thing to do, after all…

Alice was sitting on the stairs as I left my room, her eyes closed and her head gently rocking from side to side.

When I reached the stairs, her eyes slowly opened, seeing nothing at first, then focusing.

Good luck today.She thought, her thoughts swirling around her ever-altering visions.

"Thanks," I muttered.

I see more good than bad… that's something, at least, right?

"Right." I nodded, heading down the stairs and breaking into a run as soon as I was clear of the front door.

David was already gone when I got to Anna's house. I took a deep breath as I crossed the lawn to the front door. All the possibilities of the day were raging in my mind. The deeper implications of what today would mean resounding in every thought.

I knocked on the door. Ha, how human I had become.

The deadbolt rattled on the other side of the door for a moment before it swung open. There she stood, slightly breathless and momentarily anxious. Her eyes locked on mine and she breathed out a deep breath, a wide smile on her face. I looked her over, overwhelmed with the reality of how serious today was—how the potential for deadliness hung over her head… but I couldn't dwell on those thoughts for long, and looking at her, I couldn't help but laugh.

"Good morning," I chuckled.

"What's wrong?" She glanced down at herself, perplexed.

"We match." I couldn't stop myself from laughing again. We did match. She also wore a light beige sweater over a white button up shirt, and jeans. She looked over my own clothes and then laughed herself.

She stepped out the house and turned to lock the door. I walked to her decrepit truck and waited at the passenger door, my disdain and disappointment evident on my face.

"We made a deal!" Her face was smug as she climbed into the driver's seat and reached over to unlock my door. I heaved a sigh and climbed into the cab of the truck.

"Where to?"

"Put your seat belt on," I teased, "I'm nervous already."

She threw an unhappy look at me while buckling her seatbelt.

"Where to?" She huffed.

"Take the one-oh-one north."

We crawled along the highway and a glacial pace. We would have made better time if I had gotten out and pushed the truck to our destination. She seemed to be having trouble concentrating on her driving, I watched her face with concern. Was she tired? She seemed to have slept soundly the night before. Perhaps she was nervous about today? Second thoughts, maybe… I couldn't be sure.

We'd barely made any noticeable progress. "Were you planning to make it out of Forks before nightfall?"

"This truck is old enough to be your car's grandfather," she said sharply, "have some respect."

We finally made it out of the town limits. The lawns and houses giving away to thick underbrush and moss-covered trees. She opened her mouth to ask for further directions, but I was one step ahead.

"Turn right on the one-ten."

She did as I instructed in silence.

"Now we drive until the pavement ends." I said, smiling at her suddenly nervous expression.

"And what's there, at the pavement's end?" she wondered, anxiety evident in her voice.

"A trail."

"We're hiking?" her voice hitched up slightly.

She wasn't especially coordinated, I expected hiking to be something she'd dislike. I was pleased to know I was correct. "Is that a problem?"

"No." she lied, poorly.

"Don't worry, it's only five miles or so, and we're in no hurry." It's true, I was in no hurry for her to see what a freak I truly was. I'd rather enjoy every second before that, stretch them out for as long as I possibly could. While things were still—well, not quite fine, but whatever they were now.

"Oh, only five miles." She repeated, like it was so much more than it was.

Her face seemed terribly distracted. I tried to figure out the thoughts behind the expression, to no success.

"What are you thinking?" I finally asked.

"Just wondering where we're going." It was plausible, but something sounded off in the delivery.

"It's a place I go to when the weather is nice." We both glanced out the windows and the quickly retreating clouds.

"David said it would be warm today." She mused, looking at the sky.

"And did you tell David, what you were up to?"

"Nope." She said, completely unbothered.

Damn. I had hoped she would rethink not telling David.

"But Jeremy thinks we're going to Seattle together?" I remembered she had told him as much, and was cheered by that small consolation.

"No, I told him you canceled on me—which is true." Again, completely at ease. Was she really so eager to put herself in danger? It was maddening. How could she just go with a vampire somewhere and not tell anyone?

"No one knows you're with me?" My frustration and despair colored my words with anger.

"That depends… I assume you told Alice?"

"That's very helpful, Anna," I snapped.

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that." Her tone was reproachful.

She was right to scold me, but I couldn't fathom how she could possibly let herself fall into the situation she was now in. It made no logical sense. "Are you so depressed by Forks that it's made you suicidal?" I demanded.

"You said it might cause trouble for you… us being together publicly." She used my previous words against me, saying it like it was the most logical reasoning in the world.

Always backwards, always the wrong instinct.

"So you're worried about the trouble it might causeme—ifyoudon't comehome?" My tone was sarcastic, I couldn't control my displeasure at the situation I had created. How idiotic of me to let this happen! What was I doing?

"I'm worried about your family, too." She said gently. "If this ends badly it hurts everyone. Your family, my family, my friends."

"Absolutely no sense of self-preservation." I muttered, probably speaking too quietly and quickly for her, to hear.

The silence in the cab hung heavy over us for the rest of the drive. This was wrong. I shouldn't have asked her to come here with me. No one knew where she was. She must have had some sort of death wish. There was no other explanation for her behavior. Certainly a lack of common sense.

The road ended all too quickly, bottlenecking into a thin foot trail. She parked the truck on the narrow shoulder and stepped out, closing her door with more force than necessary, not looking back at me. She was mad at me. I was only concerned for her safety, and she was mad at me! It was utterly perplexing.

I watched her stretch and look around. She fiddled with her sweater for a moment, before pausing and pulling it off, tying around her slender waist. It was warmer than usual today, after all. I pulled my sweater off, too. Not because of the warmth, but because I wouldn't need it… not for today's purpose.

I wondered if it wouldn't be better to wait here until the clouds cleared completely, to show her the truth before we got too deep into the woods. If I showed her what I looked like in sunlight here, now, she could jump back in her truck and get away. Run away from the freak, the monster. I quickly rolled the sleeves of my shirt up to my shoulders. No, I should let her truly see what a monster I was. I quickly unbuttoned the shirt before climbing out of the truck, slamming the door behind me.

I stared into the deep woods behind the truck for a moment. No. I wouldn't run away. I would take her where I intended to, and I would show her the truth of me, and she would survive it. I promised myself that. If I gave up now, what was the point of it all? But I shouldn't be mad at her. After all, I could have insisted she tell someone—I could have made her promise me. I was putting her in this danger, it should be no surprise that she ran into it headlong. It was my job to remove the danger in the first place.

"This way," I glanced at her over my shoulder.

"The trail?" She scrambled around the truck to meet me, panic clear in her voice.

"I said there was a trail at the end of the road, not that we were taking it."

"No trail?" The desperation in her voice was comical. Of all the things to be terrified of… A little bit of hiking? It was ridiculous, and yet it was exactly what I'd expect of her. This ridiculous, beautiful girl. Always surprising, always perplexing.

"I won't get you lost." I turned to face her, thoroughly amused by her desperate panic.

Her breath caught, and she stared at me with wide eyes. What had I done wrong? The sun wasn't quite through the clouds yet, I hadn't made any sudden movements, I was smiling… I stare at her, bewildered.

Then I realized. Perhaps the reality, the danger of the situation had hit her. She was scared of me, of being alone—truly alone—with me.

"Do you want to go home?" The pain I felt was heavy in every word, despite my best attempts to beat it back. I could not fault her for wanting to escape me.

"No." She said, walking forward to my side. Her eyes locked on the forest.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm not a good hiker. You'll have to be very patient." Her expression seemed off as she looked at me.

"I can be patient—if I make a great effort." I smiled at her, suddenly feeling very foolish for my outburst in the truck. She had only been trying to protect me. Misguided as that thought was, it came from a caring place, and I had been angry with her for it. "I'm sorry for my behavior in the truck."

She smiled back, but there was still something off that I couldn't place despite my best efforts.

"I'll take you home," I vowed, to her and myself. I did not want her to be afraid. I did not want her to have to think about what might happen if something went wrong today. She should never feel that way around me. I should be strong enough to ensure that she always felt safe and protected.

Her cheeks suddenly began to flush slightly, and she locked her eyes back on the forest. "If you want me to hack five miles through the jungle before sundown, you'd better start leading the way," she sighed, rolling up the sleeves of her shirt and tightening the knot of her sweater around her waist.

I frowned, trying to understand her strange expressions and reactions to no avail before leading the way into the trees.

She kept pace better than I expected, I made sure to choose the safest path for her; the most even surface, the least amount of foliage. I kept everything I could out of her way, clearing an easier path for her. Occasionally, there was no way to avoid a fallen tree or boulder, but I would gently ease her over, my hand light on her elbow just until she was clear of the debris. Every time I touched her, it felt like electricity. I could hear her pulse spasm at each little touch, and I eyed her with confusion.

Actually, I noticed quite often that we would be walking, with no change to our speed or the terrain, and her heart would suddenly begin pounding against her chest for no apparent reason. How strange, I knew that wasn't normal. Perhaps she had some sort of heart condition she hadn't told me about? That didn't seem likely.

My nerves would start to get the best of me now and then, the closer we got. So I would ask her a question I hadn't thought of the previous two days. Simple questions; birthdays, old teachers—just something to keep her talking so I could hear her voice and take advantage of the soothing effect it seemed to have on me.

"Did you have any pets growing up?" I asked.

"Sort of…" She hesitated. "Gold fish."

"That counts. No others?"

"After I accidentally killed the third gold fish in a row, I kind of gave up on the whole idea of pets, in general." She dead-panned.

Her dry tone and dead delivery caught me off guard and I laughed, loudly. It felt good to laugh today.

We hiked for most of the morning, Anna kept a steady, if slow, pace. It was rather enjoyable watching her; the concentrated expression on her face, the overly cautious way she would navigate even the simplest terrain…

After several hours, the light filtering through the leaves began to shift, the bland olive tones shifting into shades of emerald and jade. The sun was out, in full force, and the moment that could change everything was nearly here.

"Are we there yet?" She asked suddenly, a teasing tone to her voice and a mock-scowl on her face.

"Nearly."So impatient, I smiled. "Do you see the brightness ahead?" I asked, glancing toward the break in the trees some two hundred yards ahead.

She squinted in the direction I had looked, her face disappointed. "Um, should I?"

Ah, so human. "Maybe it's a bit soon foryoureyes."

"Time to visit the optometrist," she mumbled. So very, very human.

But after another hundred yards, her expression altered. She could see the change in the light, her face brightened with it. She began to walk faster now, eventually passing me and hurrying on ahead. I let her lead, not eager for what was to follow.

She reached the edge of the ferns and peered out into the bright, unforgiving daylight. A smile spread across her face as she stepped out into the clearing. Into my meadow.

She walked slowly, marveling at the wildflowers, the soft grass, the peaceful tranquility of this, my favorite place to hide away from the cares of the world. Here, in this meadow, I would come to escape everything. I didn't have to pretend to be anything here, I didn't have to drown out the voices of the world around me. I could just be myself here; separate and alone. It was my own private sanctuary, hidden from even my family. And I had brought Anna here. I wanted to share it with her. The last of my secrets, in a way. But there was one secret I hadn't shared with her yet, one important secret she did not know.

I watched her, peaceful, beautiful, and serene. She stretched her arms out, and tilted her head back, letting the sun cascade over her ivory skin. Then she turned halfway, looking behind her. Her serene expression vanished, and she spun around scanning the clearing with panicked eyes. She spotted me, hidden in the shadows of the trees at the meadow's edge.

I wanted to desperately to join her. To close the distance between us. But I was scared. The shadows were where I belonged, not in Anna's beautiful sunlit world. It was not for me. I could not dare to encroach upon it. And if I did, what would she think? Would she embrace this aspect of my inhumanity as she had all the others? Or would she be repulsed by me, as she should be? I was frozen, unable to move, watching her with wary eyes.

She took a step toward me, her blue eyes curious. Then she smiled, warm and encouraging. She beckoned me with her hand, like my place was there with her in the sun. Like I belonged in her world. She took another step toward me and I held up my hand to stop her. She hesitated, rocking back on her heels, her expression confused.

Suddenly I wasn't sure of anything anymore. Was I ever that sure to begin with? I didn't know if I could do this. I didn't know if I was strong enough. Would I be overcome by this and fail? Ruin the only truly good and perfect thing on this whole earth? I was too far—too deep into this—to run away now, I had to move forward. I imagined if I could see Alice's mind now, her visions would be unstable and shaky, uncertain and unpredictable. That shaky future was all I had now, so all I could do was step forward.

I slowly removed my shirt, dropping it to the forest floor. keeping my undershirt on I took a deep breath, I closed my eyes, and then I stepped out into the bright glow of the midday sun.