Leonard stood, frozen to the spot for a few minutes after she walked out, wondering, hoping, wishing that she would suddenly change her mind and come back through those doors, but she didn't. She was gone and he didn't know how long for. He slowly made his way back up all the flights of stairs and into his apartment, making a point of not looking towards Pennys door, because knowing that she wasn't on the other side, and wouldn't be again for quite some time, was something he just couldn't bear to think about.
He entered his apartment and looked around, trying to figure out what to do. He glanced toward the cupboard where he knew all the alcohol was kept, and for a second he thought about doing what he had done the last time he lost something he cared about, but he quickly shook the thought out of his mind. He had promised Penny he wouldn't look to drink to ease his pain again, and he wasn't going to break that promise. So instead he took off his glasses and lay faced down on his couch. He lay there thinking of Penny and blamed himself for letting her go. He told himself he should have tried harder to make her stay. He should have kept a hold of her bag, and refused to say goodbye, and maybe she wouldn't have gone. But then he wondered if there was anything he could have done to make her stay, maybe there were no words he could have said that would have convinced her. He desperately wanted her to be here with him, but she had said that this was something she needed to do and he didn't want her to be unhappy. He didn't want her to stay here and be miserable, he just hoped that one day she would return from Nebraska, and make his life whole again.
Leonard lay there, in another world as he thought over everything that had happened, until Sheldon came home, with Amy in tow and bags of food in their hands.
"Get your feet off my spot." He said simply as he put the food on the counter. "And get your body off Amy's spot."
Leonard groaned as he sat up, obeying his friends orders, simply because he had no strength to fight them.
"Is everything okay Leonard?" Amy asked, and he was slightly glad that at least one of his friends realized that something was wrong with him. Leonard shook his head slowly as he put on his glasses again.
"We have brought home dinner," Sheldon said, ignoring Amys conversation with Leonard. "I'll go over to Pennys and see if she will be joining us." He said as he began to walk out the door.
Amy came over and sat beside Leonard, about to quiz him on what was bothering him, and Leonards stomach fell as he realized he would have to tell them. "Sheldon, she's not there." He said sadly.
Sheldon turned around, "Oh… Where is she?"
"She went home." He replied, looking down at his hands.
Sheldon looked at him in confusion for a second, "What are you talking about, that is her home." He said as he began to walk over to the door again.
"No, Nebraska home."
Amy gasped in shock beside him, "Oh my God." She said quietly.
"Preposterous." Sheldon said defiantly. "She wouldn't go back to Nebraska. She has commitments here, a job and a fiancé!" He then opened the door and walked over to Pennys, and began to knock on her door.
Leonard closed his eyes as he listened to his friends' ritualistic knock, and then waited in silence while no-one answered. "They broke up." He shouted out to his friend.
Amy then suddenly remembered the talk that she and Bernadette had had with Penny the other day, and it all began to fall into place. Penny had looked so exhausted and confused, it sort of made sense that she would want to get away from everything here, but it still hurt, and she wished that she had had a chance to say goodbye to her before she left. "When did she go?" Amy asked softly.
"Um… about half an hour ago, I think." He said sadly. "She said she needed some time away to figure out some stuff. I mean, what could she possibly have to figure out?" He said as tears began to fill his eyes. He then heard Sheldon knock on Pennys door again, in the same way he always did, and then wait for someone to answer.
"Maybe it's for the best," Amy said quietly, hoping to give him some comfort. "She has been through a lot over the past few weeks; she just needs time to recover properly."
"But why can't she do that here?!" He said pleading with Amy to give him and answer, "Why can't she recover here… with me… with us? I could look after her. Why does she feel the need to go miles and miles away for something she can get right here…" He broke down into tears and Amy couldn't help but tear up too, as Sheldon came back into the apartment.
"Is she really gone?" Sheldon asked and Amy nodded as she wiped away the few tears forming in her eyes. He glanced over to her door, and then back to look at Amy and Leonard. "But she didn't say goodbye."
"She did. She said goodbye to me…" Leonard said sadly.
"But not me!" He said, "Or Amy, Bernadette, Howard or Raj. She can't leave without saying goodbye to her friends!" Sheldon sounded angry, but both Leonard and Amy knew he was just trying to cover up the fact that he was sad. He would never like to admit how much he cared for Penny, constantly telling everyone how she drove him crazy, and she did, but she had become as much a part of his life as she had Leonards, and they knew he was going to miss her, as much as he would pretend he won't.
"I don't know, Sheldon. She seemed like she was in a hurry, she probably didn't have time."
"Do you know when she's coming back?" Amy asked.
"No, she didn't say." Leonard said shaking his head, and then looked down at his hands again. "I knew she was still upset," He said quietly and to no-one in particular. "I just can't believe she left. I thought she was getting better…" He said sadly as he sniffed away his tears.
"She was," Amy said, putting a hand to his shoulder. "But sometimes a girl just has to go home, to be surrounded by her family that love her dearly and help her that little bit more."
"But I love her," He said sadly, as he continued to look at his hands. "We all do. I thought we were helping her get back to normal."
Amy felt an overwhelming amount of sympathy for Leonard at that moment, he had been through so much himself with everything that had happened, but he never thought once about himself, it was always Penny. Amy knew it would be hard for Leonard to understand why she had left, he just didn't understand that sometimes people have to go back home and feel the warmth of their family around them to help them through bad times. She figured it was down to the fact he never felt that warmth and love from his family, and so would never have that feeling of needing to go back home. "We did help her." She said to him softly. "You helped her. She told Bernie and I that you have been her rock throughout all of this."
Leonard looked at Amy and frowned, not quite believing that Penny would have told them that, and wondering for a second if she had told them everything else. "Really? She said that?"
Amy nodded. "Yeah, she told us everything." She said looking straight into his eyes, and he knew then that she knew. "Leonard she wouldn't have gotten this far without you, I am certain of that. She really cares about you, but she's still confused, especially after everything that has happened. She will come back, I am sure of it." She tried her hardest to muster up a smile, before looking beside her and seeing Sheldon, sitting there listening intently to every word she had said. She could have sworn she seen tears in his eyes, but he blinked and all evidence of those tears had gone.
Leonard sat in silence for a few seconds as his mind went over everything Amy had said to him. It gave him some comfort, knowing that Penny credited him for her recovery so far, and he had to believe what Amy said, she will come back. She needed to be home, with her family for now, and although he may not understand it, he had to accept it.
"You really think she will come back?" Sheldon asked, much to the surprise of Leonard who had completely forgotten he was there because he was being so quiet.
"Of course she will." Amy said quietly, hoping that she was right. "Of course she will."
Penny sat alone in the airport, surrounded by people, as her mind relived every moment of that goodbye with Leonard. She was so glad she had stayed and said goodbye to him, but she felt terrible for what she was putting him through by leaving. She hated that he had even considered that he would have been one of the bad memories driving her away, she hated that she couldn't give him the one thing he had asked her for, and stayed. She relived each moment in her head, trying to remember what she had told him, and if she had made it clear to him that this wasn't his fault, because she knew he had a tendency to blame himself for everything that happened around him. He would probably think he wasn't good enough to help her through this, that he had somehow done something wrong that had caused her to leave. And that thought alone made her stomach churn, so much so that she almost grabbed her case and left the airport to go back to him, just to make sure he knew that he wasn't at fault here. That there was nothing he could have done that would have changed how she felt right now. That what was causing her to leave was her own mixed emotions and her inability to handle them properly. That she cared about him, so much that she was terrified of reading her feelings for him wrong, like she had done before, and hurting him in the same way she had Brandon. And most importantly, that she would be back. Tears filled up her eyes as she thought about it, about picking up her bag and heading straight back to him, but she couldn't. What good would it do if she did? She would be going back to all the same emotions she had had before, all the confusion and uncertainty, all the pain and despair. She was being selfish, and she knew it. She was putting her own needs before his, but she had to. She had to get rid of all the anguish that had surrounded her life, and be brought back to her old self, by going back to the place that had made her who she was. She just hoped Leonard understood that, and would forgive her for leaving.
Penny wiped away the tears that had fallen to her cheeks, and took a few deep breaths. She glanced around the airport, watching the people around her to try and take her mind off of Leonard. She studied the businessmen and women, the families who looked like they were going on vacation, the couples, sitting together, looking blissfully happy and almost unaware of everything going on around them. She watched those couples, and yearned for her life to be that simple and happy again, before deciding to get up and walk around before those thoughts made her tear up again. She wandered around the airport for a while, going in and out of shops, mindlessly picking things up, and looking them over then putting them back. She circled the departures lounge, over and over, until her flight was called over the loud speaker. She breathed a sigh of relief; glad that she would finally be on her way home, and that she wouldn't have to wander around the airport anymore in an attempt to distract her thoughts.
Penny swiftly headed to her gate and waited patiently amongst the other travellers. She followed the herd of people through security, all the way to the plane and to her seat, which she was glad to find was beside a window. She got herself comfortable, put her purse under her seat and ordered a drink from the air-hostess, while a young man came over and sat down beside her. She sat patiently, looking out the window, taking in her last look over California, when the young man sitting beside her began to talk. "Hi, I'm David." He said with a grin.
Penny was surprised at first, as she hadn't really expected, or wanted to talk to anyone right now, but she didn't want to seem rude, so she smiled politely back at him and said, "Hi, I'm Penny"
"Nice to meet you." He replied as he held out his hand and she shook it, before looking out her window again, hoping the conversation was over. "What are you heading to Nebraska for?"
Penny held in a sigh, she really didn't want to be rude, but she wasn't in the mood for talking to strangers either. She turned around and looked at him, he was fairly handsome, dressed in a simple shirt and jeans. He had thick blonde hair and striking blue eyes, which made him look a good bit younger than he probably was. If she had been on this plane under different circumstances, she probably would have been quite attracted to him. She would have flirted her way through his questions and by the end of the flight she was certain she would have his number, or he would have hers. But, things were different, and right now, picking up men was the last thing on her mind. She just wanted to get home to her family. Reluctantly, however, she continued to politely answer his questions as she sipped on the drink the air-hostess brought her, trying her best not to show how annoyed she was becoming that he wouldn't just leave her alone. She tried to look out the window again, hoping he would get the point, but he didn't. She pulled out her Rubix cube, hoping he would leave her alone to concentrate on it, but that only raised more questions from him.
Eventually he asked the question Penny knew he would, but had hoped he wouldn't. He waited until just before the flight began to land, after everyone was told to return to their seats and put their seatbelts on. "So, can I get your number? Maybe we could hang out some time while you are home?" He said with a charming smile, showing off his bright white teeth.
Penny smiled, it had been a while since she had been hit on by a guy, and that was probably because of the diamond sparkler that had shown her unavailability to everyone she met. But even although she didn't have that ring on her finger anymore, even although she didn't have a fiancé or a boyfriend, she was still unavailable, in her own mind anyway. She smiled once again to the man beside her and shook her head. "Sorry, I have a boyfriend." She said. She was lying, she had no attachments that would stop her from hanging out with that guy, but it wouldn't be right. Leonard still stuck on her mind, even as that man flirted with her, and she couldn't shake the feeling that if she flirted back, if she gave that guy her number and went on any sort of date with him, she would be betraying Leonard in some sort of way.
The last few moments on the plane were quite uncomfortable, the man beside her was obviously disappointed that he wouldn't be getting to spend any more time with her as he had become very quiet. And after a silent descent, the plane landed and she said goodbye to him. Then once again she followed the herd through security, to baggage claim and finally to the arrivals lounge, where she saw her mom and dad, eagerly waiting her arrival. As soon as she saw them she ran through the crowds, as fast as her feet would let her, with her case wheeling along behind her. When she was within a few feet of them, she let go of her case and threw her arms around her father, bursting out into tears as she squeezed him tightly, before letting go and doing the same to her mother.
"I've missed you so much." She said through her sobs as she clung to her mother.
"We've missed you too sweetie." Her mother said softly as she held her tight and her dad collected her case. "Now, let's get you home and get some good Nebraskan food in that belly," She said with a grin as she pulled away from her and then pinched her cheeks. "Let's see if we can get some meat on these bones!"