Chapter 22/ Rush of Blood to the Head
You may call it in this evening
but you've only lost the night
present all your pretty feelings
may the comfort you tonight
and I'm climbing over something
and I'm running though these walls
I don't even know if I believe
everything you're trying to say to me
In the morning she's greeted by a rare appearance of sunlight pouring through the curtains and lighting the room a golden tint. She's naked and wrapped around an airy white feathered comforter, her hair tangled out around her. She turns to her side taking Freddie's sleeping form in.
God, she could get used to waking up like this every morning.
When picturing her life, she never imagined it to go like this. A part of her knew she would always love Freddie, he was her fist love after all, but she would always come back down to reality and realize how unconventional it was. But somehow here they were. And sure they fight and bicker, but that's the beauty of it; no matter what they go through they always manage to come out on top. So she doesn't worry about it that much.
The amount of love she feels for him is inexplicable.
He's still beside her, eyes resting in peaceful sleep she knows he hasn't gotten in a long time. And she can't help but feel proud of herself for being the one to do that. Sam nudges herself against him, her fingers drumming along his skin in rhythm. Everything is so clam and peaceful that it's surreal it can even be like this after everything they're going though.
"You know that feels really good." Freddie mumbles. His eyes remain closed but a soft smile shaped his lips. "Hm, really?" Sam questions replacing her fingers with her lips. "How does this feel?" She asks getting on her knees so she straddling him. "You sure know how to wake a guy up uh, Puckett?"
Sam shrugs with a playful smile. "I try." She chuckles at the lightheartedness of their conversation as she leans back in him, her hot breath against his collarbone, trailing up his neck until she reaches his lips. But she doesn't take it any further, instead she climbs off him and snuggles close, her head resting in the crook of his shoulder.
"You're such a tease." He jokes kissing her forehead. A formed fist hits his chest. "Hey!" "And you're such a pussy." She laughs as the moment passes before them.
They lay in comfortable silence for a while eyes wandering around the room in apprehension. But somehow, being there together wasn't that terrifying.
"You know, it's not so scary in here." Sam voices softly into the thin air around her. Freddie nods.
"Yeah, I don't know what we were afraid of."
Silence envelopes around them again, her arms providing the necessary comfort. "I think maybe we were scared of erasing them... coming in 'ere." Freddie lets out rather abruptly. The thought of Carly and Adam instantly weight her heart down. "You know, in a way, we are." Sam exhales, swallowing the bile that managed to form in the back of her throat. Freddie shifts to look down at her. "Hey, don't think like that."
"It's true."
"We're not erasing them, Sam." He insists. "They were still apart of our lives one way or another... so what, we're living in their house and raising their daughter? It's what they wanted."
Sam nods trying to push all of the negative connotation out of her head. "Your right."
"I know I am." Freddie nearly chuckles as he runs his fingers soothingly through her blond locks.
The doorbell suddenly rings brining them back to reality. Sam groans. "Who the hell could that be?" Freddie shrugs in confusion. His mother has Emma, Spencer and Meghan were probably too tried for early visits. "I don't know." He revealed climbing out of the bed and throwing a shirt over his head.
"You know some people still consider nine am early! Especially after a national holiday!" Sam shouts in utter annoyance. They literally couldn't have a peaceful morning?
Freddie throws her a husky smile as he exits. "Be right back."
Downstairs he's met with Spencer.
"Hey, your mother was pulled into an emergency shift, as asked me to take Emma here home." He referred to the sleeping eleven month old in her car seat beside him. "Oh, that's fine I was actually on my way to pick her up. Thanks so much man." Freddie explains gesturing for him to come in.
"I can't stay long, Meghan is pulling her hair out—"
"Hey Freddie! If you hurry I'll show you what else feels good!" Sam shouts from the top of the stairs. Red flushes across his face as Spencer gives him a look. "I take it Sam didn't get on her plane?" He questions pretending to be oblivious. "Oh suck it, I know you knew."
The two men break out in laugher.
"Spencer's here!" Freddie shouts back. In the distance he can hear her curse. "Uh, hi S-Spencer!"
"I guess that was my cue." Spencer smirks handing Emma over to Freddie. "Hey thanks again."
...
They go out to Breakfast that morning in celebration, which as also allows Freddie to further explained what happened the night before considering they didn't really have much time to talk. And when they get home there's a voicemail waiting for them. "Can you check that? I'm gonna go put Emma down for her afternoon nap." Sam asked making her way up the stairs.
He nods his mood in pure euphoria.
"Hi, it's Emily Thompson. I'm calling to check in and see how you guys are holding up, as well as invite you to a small lunch soirée were having. Give me a call back when you can!"
The message puzzles Freddie. Last time he saw Emily was at the funeral where she proved to be distant. It was as if she was attached to her mother's hip in fear. Freddie had known Emily for a while now, now, she wasn't in their usual group for she had her own, but she did appear here and there a few times.
She was a peculiar woman. And although her parents were one of the top wealthiest socialites in Seattle she was proudly self made.
"Who was that?" Sam asked pacing down the stair in a hushed voice.
"Emily, er, Adams sister."
"Emily?" The blond questioned trying to put a face of the name. "What did she want?"
"To invite us to a lunch party."
"Lunch party?" Sam repeated nearly disgusted in amusement. "Well, soirée, really." He chuckled wrapping his arms around her frame. "I wonder what that's all about." She mumbled. "What do you mean?" There was something off in the sound of Sam's voice that bothered him when it came to the topic of Emily.
"I just mean that it weird timing, that's all." She explained freeing herself of his grasp and heading to the kitchen. And as Freddie followed he contemplated where she was coming from exactly. Sam had never really met Emily before, maybe once or twice at the parties Carly threw, but very briefly. So she wasn't as keen on letting yet another person into their lives so freely, especially with all that's going on.
"Sam trust me, there's no reason to be suspicious of Emily." He defended taking a seat at the island.
"How can you be so sure?" She insisted rummaging about to make some coffee.
"I don't know... I just don't think this is that." He replied trying to persuade her. But Sam wasn't having it. "Okay let's say she's fine, or whatever, do we still have to go to this stupid thing?"
"Yes." As soon as that word escape his lips the expression on Sam's face fell. "Why? You know I hate those things... They're filled with people who are so rich and well off their activities contain giving their money away, it's just—ugh I'd rather not be there." "Aw Sam come on, I never pegged you for a quitter. Plus it'll be good for Emma to see her aunt, her family. I want her to know them." There was no denying the genuine tone in his voice and she had to admit he was right, Emma should get to know her blood-realted family.
"Fine. We'll, go to this thing, but the second something happens I don't like, we're leaving." Sam demands pouring them some coffee. Freddie just smiles taking her presence in. "Of course, Princess Puckett."
"Don't call me that."
"So what's the plan for today?" Sam asks after a moment taking a seat at the island next to him. "I have to pop by work," he begins starting simple. "want to talk to Margret about bout a few things." He explains.
"Oh yeah? Like why she drugged you?"
"Well, no." He replies softly. Truth was he didn't trust Margret and never had. But after Sam left, he had nothing. Nothing to gain, nothing to lose but himself. "I can't let her know I really suspect anything." "Right." Sam exhaled sharply. She didn't like the plan, then again she wasn't a fan of most of their plans.
"What is it?" Freddie asked noticing her lack of enthusiasm.
She turned away from him and mumbled something about coming back to reality that he didn't fully catch. "Sam, come on. What?" He pressured, his finger tracing patterning into hand.
"I-I just, I don't like you doing all that..." She's vulnerable, he can in the way her voice lowers as she speaks. "Do you think I like it? I don't like it Sam, but I have to. What else are we gonna do?" He spoke softly. She had to admit he was right. This wasn't just some problem they could ignore. It wasn't going anytime soon. So she nods in agreement taking a sip of her coffee.
"I also have to go to Brads apartment." The name makes him feel sick and grabs Sam attention. She gives him a questionable look. "I have to plant that USB. I managed to encrypt a fourth of the Suri program on it, to see what they do with it if they get their hands on it. You know, test run."
The blond nods once again. "And I can't object to this?" She cracks a smile although it's not genuine. And he sees right through it.
"Afraid not." He joins her. They're pretending this is normal. And in a way, it is their new normal. He smiles at her and takes a sip of the coffee.
"Where do you keep it?" Sam then asks out of no where.
"Keep what?"
"Suri. I hope you hid it well." She expresses tension rising before their actions. Freddie nods.
"It's safe."
"Good." She wants to say more, she wants him to tell her, to show her just in case. But she remains quiet learning to restrain her voice around the situation. It wasn't like her, but lately a lot of things she's done aren't like her. So she doesn't pay much attention to it. "I'm gonna call Emily back, you better get to it if you want to make it back on time for lunch." Sam announced quickly changing the subject to make herself better.
Freddie nods with a small smile. "We'll figure this out Sam." He's discovered some new found optimism around her. Which she guessed was good, but she is not the type to let herself believe in false hope. "I'm gonna head out," Freddie states leaning in for a quick kiss. It's so normal and habitual it nearly scares her, but as she watches him bid Emma goodbye she lets the fear subside knowing it was never anything but good old nothing doubt.
"Bye." She mumbles feeling something short of a teenager dumbfounded by this new concept called love. It was true, everything felt safe and whole around him. The idea that everything turning out for the better was suddenly a real possibility.
…
"I see you haven't been taking the medication." Margret begins with a tight smile. Freddie sits across from her, back flat against the couch, shoulder broad and relaxed. She doesn't scare him, not anymore. "Sadly, I ran out." He confirms smoothly. "In all honesty I feel more concentrated without it— well most times." He chuckles. "I don't know, maybe I don't need them anymore. I feel pretty fine now." He plays his role perfectly.
Margret just nods, starting him down with a chilling grin. "Well that's good to hear, but you should leave that decision up to me, dear."
"Oh I am." He clarifies. "You can write whatever it is you want about me in that notebook. Be my guest, scribble away to your hearts content, Margret. I couldn't care less where your evaluation of me stands." He wants to make it clear she's not the one in charge anymore.
"You do realize the consequences Mr. Be—"
"Of course." His smile is clear cut and deeming and for some reason Tennings backs off. "I took a close look at what you were prescribing me, now I don't exactly know what your plan is but guess would be that it was never in it for me to find out you've been giving Xanax, am I right?" Margret remains quiet, but the expression on her face doesn't shift an inch. She's calm and collected with no sign of further movement and it truly brings fear to him for a moment. But he quickly regains his composure before she notices anything and continues.
Theres nothing more he wants to do in that moment then accuse her right there and then but he has to remind himself to stick to the plan. But instead he shifts his tone and carries on.
"Well, I did find out. And I gotta say, this stuff does it." He reveals smoothly.
Margret frowns in confusion.
"I'm trying to convince myself that I'm okay without it but I just can't seem to shake that feeling off, you know?" He continues, selling it. "I mean, sure I concentrate better with it but maybe thats not the real point."
"What do you mean?"
Freddie shrugs. "Maybe I'm supposed to take a step back and relax. I don't know." Margret's threatened expression softens once she realizes where he's going with this. "So, you want more?" She inquired with a rather interested tone. Freddie nods, leaning back into the couch. "You can do that, right?"
"Of course I can do it," Th question of her abilities bring out the anger in her. "And no offense, but I never pegged you for a drugie, Mr. Benson." Margret implies but digs through her belongs for the notepad prescription. He just smiles, realizing he's done it. He tries to keep the calm expression his face as his heart races violently in his chest.
"Well, if my indulgence for the richer experiences in life give me that title, then so be it." He shrugs as she hands him the prescription. He can see it in her eyes as he takes the paper and folds it, neatly tucking into a binding in his wallet. There so sort of crazed fascinating within them as if everything was falling in place and she just couldn't contain her happiness.
"Three a day is normal, I wouldn't go over five." She warns as he gets up wanting nothing more than to retire from her office and check up on Mason.
"Thanks."
Margret just smiles him off and watches as he disappears down the hall and out of sight.
…
"I called Emily. The girl seems nice." Sam commented as Freddie walked though the apartment buildings hallway. There was one more thing he had to do before he went home: plant the mock Suri.
"Good. What time do we have to be there?"
"Thing starts at one, I say we get there around two or something." She suggests seriously. Freddie let out a chuckle more from actually being nervous than anything else. Sam's witty humor was actually helping the situation for once.
"Sam…" He exhaled.
"I know, I know. One, I get it." She pouted. He smiled just thinking of the face she was making. "When are you getting back?" She then questioned wanting nothing more than to keep the conversation going knowing it was a good distraction for him. He wasn't good in those types of situations
"Soon. This won't take long." He had to do this quick. "Good. Because Emma's getting antsy and I don't know what to do anymore." She complains in utter exaggeration.
Freddie comes upon the front door and stops for a moment. Sam's voice grows distant through the receiver as his heart begins to race just staring that the red of the door. Last time I was here Brad was alive. That's the only thing running through his brain at the moment.
"Freddie?" Her voice snaps him back to reality.
"Yea-yeah?" He responds turning away from the door. He doesn't think he can do it.
"I asked if you got there." She clarifies softly. He nods. "Yeah. I did. I'll call you back?"
"Sure."
After ending the call with Sam he stood frozen in front of the door or a while. He wanted to move, he wanted to barge through that door and get this over with but he just couldn't bring himself to move. And suddenly the key in his hand weighted a hundred pounds.Come on Freddie. In and out. His hand reached for the lock, turning the key. And before he knew it the sight of the still and quiet apartment was in his view.
The place was engulfed in light from the mid afternoon sun shining through the the tall windows. It was strange to see this place light up like so, it almost resembled an angelic glow of some sort.
As the initial shock wore off he paced to the bedroom, quickly reaching underneath the last drawer of the dresser. And just like he stated, there was the folder. There didn't seem to be much inside, other than a few face profiles, and copies of both of his and Adam's the legal will's they arranged explaining what would happen to the company in the event that he or Adam should both die. A few sentences were highlighted, but none really meant anything to him.
Still, he pulled out his phone and took pictures of both fronts and backs of all the documents in the folder, not wanting to miss anything. But something caught his attention upon reaching the backside of the will. Something he was sure he hadn't seem before. Under Full Name and Contact Details of Legal Heirs of Adam's will, three names were stated. The first being him, the second his sister, and the third, highlighted boldly: Parker Evans
What the hell? His heart stopped. His breath shorted. His senses froze. Parker? The same parker who kept wanting to buy the company? The same Parker who hit me over the head?
But before he had anytime to try to makes sense of it he heard the door struggled open. Quickly, he shoved the folder back under the drawer before nearly jumping behind the door of the bath off the bedroom. Fuck.
…
The man was built tall and carried around a bulky frame. His hair was shaved to a light buzz, he looked no older than mid-thirties and Freddie was sure he'd seen him before.
He moved fast, as if he was timed or something. And just like he predicted, the man went straight for dresser, almost as if he knew exactly where the contents of that folder lay. His heart raced thundery as he hid behind the door, barely breathing as he was trying to keep a still frame, not wanting is presence known.
As the man dug around, Freddie's confidence gained some interesting boast because before he knew it he was pulling out his phone. Making sure it was silent, he placed the camera through the crack in the door and snapped a couple pictures for evidence. How knew when it was going to come in handy?
So open up my eyes
tell me I'm alive
this is never gonna go our way
if iI'm gonna have to guess what's on your mind
say something, say something
something like you love me
less you want to move away
from the house of this place