A heavy consciousness ebbed through me in waves. I could just barely make out anything around me. The world was flowing quickly around me like a dark angry river, sucking me under the water, making it impossible to breathe, to think. The current pulled me into the darkness, and I tried to swim back up into the light. But any strength I had was gone. My body allowed itself to be pulled back and forth through the currents. There was something on my side, holding me, trying to pull me up, but I was too heavy. It was the sounds that yanked be back up to the surface. I took a breath at the surface and saw light.

My head was heavy, my limbs were useless. The only constant in my dizzying nightmare was the flow of pain through my body. My skin was on fire, but my heart couldn't feel much colder. The noises finally met my ears and for a second, I could understand it all.

Something collapsing was the first thing I heard. Then screams. Yelling. Sirens in the distance. Someone speaking in my ear. "-you hear me? Do you hear me?! I will not lose you, Kara, not now, or ever. So damn you; you better not fucking leave me!" Fingers were digging into my bicep desperately as the voice begged.

"-Step back, someone, pull her back-"

"Supergirl can you hear me?"

I was numb. Frozen. Stuck. Trapped.

"Hey, hey. No, it's okay. Don't try to move. You're in neurogenic shock. You hit the ground pretty hard. We don't know the full extent to your injuries right now, but the good news is that you won't feel too much pain. You're about to go into bradycardia. Your heart is going to slow substantially and your blood pressure is going to drop even more. You're going to want to go to sleep and-" I groaned as extreme amounts of pain surged through my body and exhaustion fogged my mind even more. Coppery blood pooled in my mouth, filled my nose. I wanted to gag, but my chest was crushed by concrete, and at that moment, a current enveloped me. Almost pulled me back down into unconsciousness. I struggled to stay afloat, awake. The pressure of the water squeezed my chest, and I couldn't breathe. My vision danced into darkness.

The voice broke through the water, and for a second, I thought I was saved from this torment. "I know, I know. You're feeling very very sleepy right now, but do not go to sleep. You need to stay awake." The river threatened to pull me back under. "Stay awake! Help is almost here-"

The water's cruel hand grabbed my leg and yanked me deep into the abyss. I could see the light fading as I was pulled down further. The pressure increased as I was enveloped by the cold nothingness.

Is this what it felt like to die?

I held my breath and hoped for a savior as I blended into oblivion.

I was pulled from the deep dark depths. My bones and muscles and joints and organs felt like they were being ripped out and smashed into a tiny box. My lungs contracted with such force that I thought they would fold into themselves. I was sucked back into unconsciousness moments after.

I kept waking and waking. Unconsciousness was better than cognizance. Because when I was awake I felt everything, and nothing. I could feel each tendon and ligament seizing and straining. The aching and cracks in my bones. Each crack felt like rocks were burrowing into my skin. Especially my leg, it echoed in agony. I sucked in cramped air and my lungs cried out. I saw the spots in the corners of my vision, making my head feel like the only thing inside of it was static. I heard a buzzing noise, filling my ears. I felt like I was there for hours, fading and waking and fading and waking. My anguish was the only thing telling me that I was alive. It was the only thing I could feel anymore.

Burning. I was burning. White hot pain ripped through my body. Would my death be quick? Practically painless? Or will I suffer?

Through the dark waves, uncertainty crossed my mind. For a split second, the waves calmed, but I didn't know what to do.

Leave?

I could finally rest in Rao's Light. With my family.

Stay?

My family was here. On Earth. With J'onn. Winn. James. Eliza. Maggie. Lena. Alex.

Leave.

Lena. Alex. I couldn't protect them.

Leave.

I failed them. I wasn't strong enough. I promised to protect them.

Stay.

I can't leave the rest of them. I made a promise.

Leave.

A promise I already broke.

No.

The waves turned to chaos once again and I was lost; torn between being here or going there.

Consciousness became solid. I grabbed a hold of it and would not let go, no matter how powerful oblivion's current was. My eyelids were still too heavy to lift. Instead, I focused my hearing. Machines beeped around me and I could hear my own labored and uneven breaths. But beyond that, I could barely make out a sound, and yet, I caught the tail end of a hushed conversation.

"-you have an out. Right now. You can get up. Get your things and leave. I won't say anything. No one else knows. You can get up right now, leave, and be guilt free. I won't blame you. Kara will never know."

"What-I can't-how could- No. No, I'm not leaving her. Not like this. I will never leave her. Never again. Not after everything I've done."

"Then promise. Promise me that you won't leave her. That you won't give up on her. She isn't something to play with. She isn't your personal fuck buddy. She has emotions. She has a heart. And I'll be damned if you ever hurt her again. I know it wasn't really your fault but you practically destroyed her last time. And now, it'll be twice as hard, given the circumstances."

"I know-"

Circumstances? My heart dropped as reality set in. Alex. Oh Rao, Alex. What have I done? Maggie, Rao. She told me she was going to propose to Alex any day now. What have I done? Terror swirled in my stomach, and pain accompanied it. I've taken away their happiness. I tried to move, but nothing in my body responded. I laid in paralysis, whether it was due to the damage done to my body, or due to the fear of the outcomes from the events at L Corp. I was stuck, and frustration replaced the terror in my body. I wanted to move, scream, anything. I wanted out. Out of this body, out of this life, out of my situation, I didn't care. I just wanted out.

Alex is dead. You caused it. You are the reason she's dead. The image of her body laying on the ground, her head surrounded by a growing pool of blood was burned into my mind and repeated on a loop. Lex's words echoed in my mind. You do know what the definition of a hero is? Its someone who gets other people killed. My heart clenched painfully. I'm so sorry Alex. I should've been smarter than to bring you and Maggie with me. I should've been faster. I'm sorry. So sorry…

I woke with dread still pinning my body to the whatever I was resting on. My senses were a bit more tuned in, but I still couldn't open my eyes. Someone was holding onto my hand. "Rao, your Word speaks promises of healing and restoration." Kryptonian. Someone was speaking Kryptonian. "And I thank you for the miracles you preformed. Today, I claim those promises over Kara. I believe in the healing power of your Light. I ask you to begin your mighty work in her life. Reach down and surround her with your Light and strength. Heal her. Your will be done." A prayer. For me.

I took a breath as my body twinged in pain. There was a slightly tangy, earthy smell that did not belong in the room. Almost pungent. Hay.

Kal?

I stayed on my spot, unmoving. Impatience rose in my stomach, but this time, I got a finger to move. "Kara? Kara? Oh Rao. Can you hear me?" He asked with shock and worry in his voice. I wanted to squeeze his hand, but I could only move my one finger. I moved my finger on the palm of his hand weakly. "Rao, Kara. Hold on, let me get Hamilton." His presence disappeared for a second.

Two sets of footsteps rushed back into the room. "Kara, can you hear me?" Hamilton asked. I nodded, although minutely. "Are you in pain?" She asked. I tried to nod again. "Okay, hold on." There was shuffling to the side of me. "Okay, that should help with the pain. Can you open your eyes for me?" She asked. I exhaled hard as I tried to open my eyes. Pain rang in my chest as my breath escaped my lips in a mangled cry.

"Easy, Kara. Don't push yourself." Kal voiced. Slowly, I opened my eyes. Everything was blurry. The room was bright, so bright. "Hold on Kara, give me a second." Some of the lights snapped off as I heard Kal take a few steps away. This couldn't be the DEO. It didn't have the DEO standard of greys and off-whites. This white in the room made it hard to focus and it washed out the small amount of color in the room. The few colors in the room faded back in as the white lights had no more dominance over them.

Hamilton was standing over me, and Kal was in the background. "How are you feeling Kara?" Kal asked. I strained to speak, but nothing came out. Frustration ran through my body. "Don't push yourself Kara, you just came out of another surgery not too long ago." Hamilton informed me as she placed a hand on my shoulder gently.

"I need to check a few things. Is that okay?" She asked. I nodded, this time, a little stronger. Hamilton moved quickly around me as she checked over my body. Hamilton reached over my head and slowly increased the incline of the bed I was on so I wasn't only looking at the ceiling. She then held a small light up to my face and shone it in my eyes. A small tsk escaped her lips and she scribbled something down on her clipboard that was resting nearby.

"Something wrong?" Kal asked. "Anisocoria." She stated. "What does that mean?" He asked. "Her pupil dilation isn't even. It's a side effect of her concussion. It usually means there could be brain damage." Hamilton looked back to me. "Are you feeling dizzy?" She asked. I shook my head. "Okay, can you feel your fingers? Your toes?" She asked. I paused, trying to feel anything. "Can you touch your thumb to your other fingers?" Sluggishly, I touched each finger to my thumb on each hand, despite some difficulty on my left because of the blue cast holding my wrist in place. "Good, your brachial plexus and long thoracic nerve are undamaged despite a few of your thoracic vertebra being fractured as well as the trauma during your fight to your limbs." I licked my lips and swallowed dryly.

Kal, who was watching me intently, handed me a paper cup full of ice chips. I gratefully chewed on them. The ice slowly hydrated my dry throat. "How about your legs?" She asked. I moved my left leg and toes easily, but my right refused to move. "'y ri-gh-t-" I whispered weakly as panic flooded my body. My vocal chords were stinging just after one choppy phrase. "Easy Kara." Kal warned once again. "Your lumbar vertebra didn't fracture, which is a miracle, but a few chipped. But that's not the reason you can't move your leg. Lex attached some type of explosive material to your knee. It tore through your ACL and LCL and shattered your kneecap. We had to go in and try to fix everything, but Kara- it was bad. We had to immobilize it, I'm sorry." Hamilton informed me solemnly.

I finally focused on my lower body. I glanced over to my right leg. It was buried under bandages, a heavy looking brace, and wires, among being elevated. I felt like I was punched in my gut. All air was pulled from my lungs. I coughed and my heart began to race. Hamilton pulled an oxygen mask over my mouth and nose. "Hey, hey. You need to calm down Kara. You fractured 2 ribs, broke 3, as well as having many lung contusions and a pneumothorax. Not to mention the amount of Kryptonite dust we had to pump out of your lungs and clean out of your bloodstream. It was so bad that your eyes were green from all the exposure. We were lucky it didn't do any significant damage to your vision."

I blinked as tears rushed to my eyes. Kal came back over to my side. He held my uncasted hand. "Don't worry Kara, everything will be okay. You'll get through this. I'll be here for you every step of the way." He tried to comfort. I swallowed hard as I saw Maggie pass by the hospital room. Alone. Alex should be here. "Kara, all I want you to do is rest. You be okay. Everything will be okay, understand? Just rest. You need it." Hamilton stated. She looked over to Kal and motioned for him to follow. "We'll be close by, Kara. Rest, please." He stated as they both left me in the room. My heart pulled me into a restless sleep.

I woke up again, and this time alone. Hamilton must've put the bed back to its horizontal position because I was looking at the ceiling once again. I studied the ceiling and followed the lines that led to the wires above my head.

Tears escaped the corners of my eyes, but I didn't care. How was I supposed to come back from all of this? No more Alex. I didn't know what happened to Lena- she could've been seriously hurt too. I never saw what happened to her after Lex threw her into sky and she came crashing back down- and my powers too. I couldn't feel the usual warmth within my body. I could only feel the synthetic sun beating down on my skin from the lamps surrounding me.

I heard the door open and close slowly. A pair of feet quietly made its way to me. "Kara?" A muffled voice asked. I looked out of the corner of my eye and saw Winn standing cautiously nearby while wearing scrubs. He smiled at me and gently took my hand. "Hey, how are you feeling?" He asked. I shook my head. "Oh, right! I brought you some ice. Hamilton said no water just yet. They don't think you'll need any more surgeries, but in case they do, you'll be ready for it."

I weakly held onto the cup as the bed adjusted to an awkward sitting position. I was definitely not in the DEO med bay. Everything was too different. Too cramped and organized. Winn broke into my thoughts. "Hamilton limited the motion. She doesn't want you to put too much pressure on your vertebrae just yet." He explained. I motioned to his clothes. "Oh, yeah. She got the hospital to give you a clean room. With all your injuries, and not having your powers, she's trying to reduce any risk of you getting sick and stressing your immune system as your body heals." He informed me. I nodded as I finished chewing on the ice.

I motioned to the room around me. "We were afraid we couldn't get you to the DEO med bay in time. Instead you were rushed here. Hamilton heard of your condition and hurried here. Don't worry, you're in a secure part of the hospital. The public believes that it's the FBI watching your door, and this wing of the hospital."

I glanced around tiredly. I guess that made more sense. "-Lex?" I asked quietly. "The DEO has him imprisoned until the government can come and secure him. They are trying to find a better suited holding facility for him." I shook my head and swallowed deeply. "A-lex?" I asked hoarsely. "Oh, um, I-I don't know. Everything has been a bit of a mess and hard to keep track of. After Mark and I sent out the signal to Jeremiah and Lena, things have been crazy. The DEO has been trying to help clean up the city and calm everyone down in your absence. I was put into command to try and help with the chaos. I finally got some time as Demos is taking charge for a bit. Hamilton said you've been waking up occasionally and I wanted to see how you were doing. Oh, but Eliza was here for a while. She stopped in here too while you were still under anesthesia." He answered. I clenched my jaw as more tears threatened to fall. Eliza was here? Was she visiting Alex in the morgue?

I closed my eyes for a minute or two. Winn's thumb rubbed small circles on the back of my palm. "Lena was brought to the hospital too." He stated. I opened my eyes. "You were right, she was being mind controlled. But Lex subjected her to untested Silver Kryptonite. I think that's why Lex had Lord on his team. Anyway, the DEO deemed her not a threat, and not responsible for her actions under the influence, so to speak. She got banged up in the chaos. The paramedics found her next to you. She wouldn't leave your side, but soon after they got there, she passed out. I think the doctors are keeping her on an overnight watch just in case, but otherwise, she's not seriously hurt." My shoulders dropped slightly in relief.

Hamilton walked back into the hospital room. "Hello Kara, Winn." She greeted and placed a clipboard down in its place. "How are you feeling?" She asked. I shook my head. Hamilton reached behind her and then offered me a cup of water, no more ice. "Drink it slowly. Otherwise, you go back to ice." She commanded. I nodded before taking a small sip. Immediately, it soothed my burning throat. Before I knew it, Hamilton handed me 2 more cups before cutting me off. "Now, can you tell me how you're feeling?" She asked again. "Numb- Ribs killing me- Breathing is hard- Can't feel my leg." I stated in irregular sentences.

"That's normal. You're going to feel very sore and numb for a while. We had to put you on a bunch of pain killers and antibiotics otherwise your body would've been too weak to heal as much as you have already." Hamilton stated.

"Powers?" I asked. She sighed. "We don't know. We've been exposing you to large amounts of concentrated yellow sun, but it doesn't seem to be helping. We don't know exactly what happened in your fight with Lex, so it's going to be more of a waiting game."

"-voice?"

"I assume from inhaling the Kryptonite on top of berating Lex in your fight with yelling and screaming, you must've over used your vocal cords. They should get better on their own in a day or so."

I looked away from them. "Okay." The urge to be alone suddenly overtook me. Gratefully, Hamilton seemed to sense this. "Come on Winn, we need to let Kara rest." He nodded and they both left me alone. I stared out of the small window. My mind drifted and my emotions swirled in my stomach.

I watched in a sense of gratefulness as the sun slowly set over the horizon of National City.

There was a small knock on the door. I looked over and saw a small figure on the other side of the door. "Supergirl?" A voice asked.

Nora walked into the room carefully. I smiled at her. "Nora." I tried to greet as happily as I could. She smiled at me. "Hi." She replied almost shyly. "I just came here to see how you were." She stated. "You didn't have to." I replied. Nora shook her head. "No, I did. I know how uncomfortable and scary it is here, so I wanted to visit you." She responded.

I furrowed my eyebrows slightly. "How did you get in here?" I asked and shifted. My ribs protested and I winced before grabbing them protectively. "Our next-door neighbor knows you." She answered. "Who?"

"Mark Jennings." She stated. A small laugh rattled my ribs and I winced again. "Are you okay?" She asked. I nodded. "Yeah. Just a small world. Didn't know Mark knew you." I stated. "Same here. But I heard you got hurt. Mark was really worried too. We all rushed down here. I talked to your friends. They were really nice."

I smiled. "Yeah, they are." I trailed off. We sat in silence for a few seconds. "Penny for your thoughts?" She asked. I smiled. "You're funny." I stated. "And you're hurting. Whaddaya thinking about?" She asked. I hesitated. "Nora, you're sweet, but trust me, you don't want to hear what's on my mind." I declared.

Nora reached out and held my hand carefully. "You're hurt, Supergirl. And not just in the physical sense." She pointed out. "Kara." I stated. "Huh?"

"My name is Kara." Nora smiled brightly. "That's a very pretty name." She stated. "Thank you." She narrowed her eyes playfully. "Hey, no changing the subject!"

I sighed deeply and glanced at her. Determination burned in her eyes. "I don't know how to bounce back from this. I don't know if I can. My injuries are pretty bad. I don't know if there's any lasting damage. And I couldn't protect my family with my powers, so how am I supposed to do it now?"

Nora squeezed my hand. "You don't need to." I raised my eyebrow. "What do you mean?" I asked. "Family is about protecting each other, not just you protecting them. It's a team effort. At least, that's how Aunt Sophie says it is. Until you're better, let them protect you. They know how hard you work to keep them safe. You don't need to take on the entire world." She said. "Isn't that kinda what Supergirl is for?" I asked. She shook her head. "You're not just Supergirl, you're Kara too. You get to be normal." She reminded me.

I glanced to the door and I saw Eliza standing there. Normal. Nora peered over to where I was looking. She stood up and smiled at me. "Stay strong Kara." Nora stated before walking out of the room. Seconds later, Eliza walked into the room and took Nora's spot next to me. "Kara." She breathed. I gave her a sorrow filled smile. "Eliza." The tension grew between us exponentially. I swallowed dryly.

Hey guys! Sorry for not updating on the weekend, but I didn't really know how I wanted to approach all of this. But I hope that you guys enjoyed it. On a quick side note, thank you to everyone who have been leaving reviews, especially all the guests! To Alliedstasis: It was a way for Kara to say to Lex that he crossed the line, and there was nothing to do to stop Kara's desire for revenge. To Whalegang34: Thanks! I felt like Kara is always grounded and kept levelheaded by her family. Whether its Alex, Winn, or anyone close to her. To Lmb: OMG thank you!

Anyways, thank you all again for the support and I guess I'll see you all in the next chapter! ~Raya Kor-El