notes— heads up for implied substance abuse (re: drugs).

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18 ; implosion

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Erza doesn't know how it went so wrong so quickly. She can't for the life of her fathom it.

"Jellal," she hisses, shaking him roughly, "Jellal, get up, the police are here, get up—"

He groans, bleary eyes blinking open. When he looks at her, his gaze is unfocused and hazy, pupils dilated. "Mmm... 'za?"

Her stomach drops as she realises: he's still completely out of it.

"Get up, you idiot, the police are out front and they're gonna come in and they're gonna find you and—" She grunts as she pulls him up, pretty much dragging him out of the dim stinking kitchen into the garden "—right now, you are—" He stumbles against her but she doesn't slow down, pulling him violently away from the house "—absolutely fucked up."

Erza doesn't like to swear. It's too violent, too vulgar, too easily avoidable; reminds her too much of her father, of screaming matches and—... and just too many things she wants to forget. So when she does and you know her, you know something is very, very wrong. And Jellal does, he does know her that well—

He was supposed to, anyway. Except right now there's so much heroin in his system that he's not himself, he's not the boy who's supposed to know her better than anyone; he's someone else entirely. A weakling on a forced euphoric high waiting for the drop, someone who left her and that trust behind as he flies through clouds in his mind, who gave up on her—

Erza has to stop the thought right there. Thinking about it makes her eyes burn, her jaw tense, and her hands itch to hit something.

"Why... Why're you helpin' me?" Jellal mumbles. Or, at least, she thinks he does, but it's slurred and mumbled and half the words don't make it past his numb lips.

She gives another violent tug on his arm, sends him stumbling into her again, and tenses herself against his added weight.

"Just because."

The words come out like poison, and she wonders hopelessly for the millionth time when her sweet boy next door turned into someone who could break her heart so often and so easily. When, and how, and why.

Except she knows. Of course she does. Just because Jellal gave up on understanding Erza doesn't mean she returned the favour.