Ten seconds
Shinra didn't disappoint. Izaya opened his rusted red eyes looking around the familiarity of the illegal doctor's sofa. Connected to his arm was a thin tube pumping the necessary nutrients into his weakened body.
"Ah." Shinra grins down at him. "You're awake. Both of you are idiots."
It's another reference to the blonde. Izaya bites his tongue so he doesn't ask how the protozoan is. Its none of his business, besides he doesn't want to poke at the thin layer around his heart. The numbness is fine. It's the memories of what he's done and the final kiss that haunts him. It's the sole reason Izaya doesn't want to sleep.
"...how long have I been unconscious?" Izaya asks twisting his fingers together. Part of him hopes the choice has been taken out of his hands.
"The rest of yesterday and what's passed of today. It's ten o'clock."
"Oh." Two hours left. Two hours until the blonde leaves Ikebukuro.
"What do you intend to do?" Shinra asks fiddling with the drip. "If you don't go, you'll regret it."
"Shizu-chan and I are finished." Izaya mutters closing his eyes.
"Like I said, both idiots. If you want to eat anything there's a bunch of food on the table."
Izaya shrugs sitting up. He feels better than he has since he walked out of Kasuka's apartment without a boyfriend. On the coffee table is a cardboard box filled with random packets of sweets, boxes of cakes and most noticeably pudding cups.
"This is all sugary." Izaya comments tossing the pudding cup back in the box.
"Is it?" Shinra shrugs. "I haven't looked through it yet."
Izaya glances at the contents again making the connection. "This is Shizu-chan's stuff. He was here?"
"To say goodbye, yeah." Shinra tells him offhandedly. "Are you worried he saw you?"
"No! I'm not...did he?" Izaya tries not to think about it. If the blonde had seen him and then still left...
"No. It looked like they were in a hurry. Shizuo didn't come in."
"How long ago?" Izaya looks over to the door.
"Hm, about ten seconds before you woke up. Celty went with him. They were close."
"You say that like you'll never see him again." Izaya murmured.
x-x-x
There's no chance for a sleep-in. Shizuo is dragged out of bed by his brother. It's the day Kasuka confronts the media about the scandal rocking his acting career. After that they'll be leaving. He himself doesn't know where nor does he care. This is what he needs- a fresh start.
The most painful part is the goodbyes. Shizuo empties the fridge placing all the treats Kasuka had brought him in a box. It will be a waste to let them run out of date. "Nii-san, what are you doing? I can buy more when we get to our destination."
"I'll give them to Celty." Shizuo shrugs hugging the box to him. "At least I can leave her with something." He hasn't contacted her once since his breakup with Izaya. Hasn't contacted anyone. Kasuka had done it all.
"...if that's what you want."
x-x-x
Shizuo tenses as the car slows outside Shinra's apartment. His nose twitches and his eyes water. Izaya. It's Izaya's smell assaulting his sensitive nose. Shizuo's breath catches in his throat. A desperate hand claws at the slim column trying to remember basic instinct.
Izaya is in the apartment. That much he should've realised. The flea and Shinra are best friends. Where else would his ex go? Kasuka is looking at him strangely. Shizuo is doubled over clutching at his chest.
"Nii-san?"
"He's here." Shizuo gasps.
"Oh. You still want to see Celty though? I'll send her out. Stay here." Kasuka pats him on the back, rubbing gently in large circles, as if its going to calm him down. It does to an extent leaving him feeling pathetic at how much damage his breakup with Izaya has done.
Shizuo is stuck waiting in the car, struggling with Izaya's cloying scent. It's so painfully nostalgic. He's not sure whether or not to say goodbye to Izaya. The raven will probably be glad to see the back of him.
Kasuka leaves with the box of goodies. The food he wanted to binge on but couldn't. His favourite snacks wasted on the cardboard taste in his mouth. The colours are gone from his world. It's nothing special. Shizuo knows he's heartbroken and pathetic. It's the same thing everyone goes through.
Except- he's given everything to Izaya.. All his feelings, all his love, everything he ever was- to Izaya. There's nothing left and that's what this journey is about. To find a new self.
A black streak bursts from the window, blurring down the side of the building at a terrifying speed. Shizuo sighs opening the door and getting out. A ball of shadow engulfs him.
"Hey, Celty. It's been a while."
The shape emerges as his friend. All he can do is wait for the messages to come flying. For now all Celty does is stand there holding him tightly. Kasuka has told her.
"I'll keep in contact. Once we've settled down, I'll let you know where we are." Shizuo promises gently patting his friend's back.
You better. Is the message he gets. I'm sorry. I should have been there for you- Shizuo takes the phone before the next word can be typed.
"This isn't your fault. There's nothing you could have done. This is what's best for me and Kasuka." Shizuo sighs leaning against the car. "Take care of yourself and...look out for the flea if you can."
I will. Aren't you going to say goodbye? Izaya isn't conscious right now.
"What-" Shizuo bit the inside of his cheek shaking his head. "No. Don't tell me. It's fine this way. We'll only end up hurting each other again."
That's not true.
"Celty...goodbye." Shizuo steps forward embracing his friend. "Thank you for everything."
You better come back.
"I will."
And put on some weight.
Shizuo looks down at his clothes, his arms were wiry and his shirt baggy. "I know. I can't sit around moping any more. Both Kasuka and I need to go."
I understand. I'll miss you.
"Me too."
x-x-x
Izaya leaves the bathroom after relieving himself. The mood in the apartment has dropped, the culprit sitting on the sofa he had vacated. Shinra is circling the sofa looking worried and trying to pacify the dullahan.
She looks up as he comes into the room. Her shadows spike before collapsing into a runny black substance. Izaya avoids her completely. It's time to leave.
"My beloved, there's no need to cry. You'll see Shizuo again." Shinra says attempting to get closer.
Izaya sighs shaking his head. The movement doesn't go unnoticed, a spear of shadow shooting into the wall closest to him.
This is your fault!
"Actually it's-" Izaya narrows his eyes glaring at the woman. "I don't have to discuss this with you. See you around, Shinra."
Another spear fires past him. Izaya shrugs it off leaving the apartment. Closing the door he runs down the stairs, wasting the energy he has recovered. He doesn't have his coat or any shoes. Celty hates him. Blames him for the blonde leaving.
"Izaya-san?" Great. The raven looks down at the bottom of the stairs where Anri stands. "You don't have any shoes on."
"I suppose I don't." Izaya shrugs. "Are you supposed to be wandering around?"
"No. I wanted to see Kida-kun."
It's what Shinra wanted him to do. To play babysitter. Izaya decides he might as well do it. He wants to see if the illegal doctor's words are true anyway.
"What are we waiting for?" Skipping down the stairs, the ex informant takes Anri's arm leading her down the next staircase. "Do you know how Masaomi ended up in such a state?"
"No. Everyone thinks it's because of the gangs." The busty teen slowed down staring at him. "Are you okay?"
"None of your concern." Izaya shrugged. He already knew it was risky leaving Shinra's care. "Ne, I wonder which one of us is the babysitter...what were Masaomi's injuries?" Their speed was slowing drastically.
"He was stabbed."
"Stabbed?" Izaya asks.
Which reminds him that he really did need to get a warning to the protozoan. The new informant was out for his blood and Shizuo would be in the firing line. It was a good thing really that the brute was leaving. Once the town was his there would be no more interferences.
"Yeah. It looks like there were two culprits. One used a knife and the other a pen." Anri explained. "I don't know anything else."
"Two people...it makes sense. Looks like I need to have a word with the other leader."
"Kuronuma-kun?"
"Yeah. Right now he should still be acting as a guard for my sisters." Izaya clutches the banister waiting for the dizziness to pass. "Since you're here, why don't we make a stop off first?"
"To see Shizuo-san?" Anri asks quietly. Izaya scowls hearing his ex's name.
"Not quite. You can pass a message on for me."
"...oh." The girl looks disappointed in him. Izaya is disappointed in himself. "Have you heard from Mikado-kun?"
Izaya eyes the ravenette with distaste. "You like to stick the knife in, hm? No I haven't. Neither should you."
"Well as long as he's happy." Anri smiles.
"Hn. Let's get a move on."
"Orihara-san, you're the one slowing us down." Izaya says nothing. It's a waste of energy he doesn't have. The girl's attitude towards him is influenced by Shinra and Celty, he just knows it.
x-x-x
There's still just under an hour to go until the press conference. The disgraced actor is fashionably late. Izaya skirts around the scene- with shoes this time and a coat; although it's not his original nor does it have the trimmed fur. The thing doesn't have a hood.
It's what you'd usually expect. A small stage set up with a podium that looks more like an execution block. The multiple representatives from the media are behind red tape, clambering around with their microphones and cameras.
It's going to be painful for Kasuka, depending on what the actor has to say, things could turn nasty. "There's no sign of Shizuo-san yet." Anri helpfully supplies.
"I can see that. I'm tired not blind." Izaya retorts wondering why he's even here. It was his decision to leave the blonde. So why was there a rush of panic in his chest the moment someone threatened the protozoan. "They might be back at the apartment."
"Wouldn't it be better to wait?" Anri asks. "They should be here soon, right?"
It's a choice. One Izaya doesn't know how much he's going to regret making. In his current state it's hard to think. Would he be running away if he went or would it be cowardly if he stayed?
"There's still plenty of time." Izaya is already making his way past the crowd, heading in the direction of the apartment.
x-x-x
The goodbyes are done. None of them were easy. Saying it to Celty was the hardest. There's still time to search out Izaya if he wishes yet Shizuo can't bring himself to do so.
Kasuka doesn't look nervous but inside he knows his younger brother is a wreck. These are the consequences of his actions and something Kasuka has to face up to. In hind sight his brother got the brunt of it. He had only lost Izaya and Mikado, whereas Kasuka had lost his fans, his peers and was being thrown to the media like a ham bone.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" Shizuo asks. It would be easy to change direction, get away from the carnage that would bear down on his brother.
"...yeah. This is my punishment." Kasuka shrugs. "What's wrong?"
They've arrived. Shizuo's nose twitches scenting Izaya through the barely rolled down window. "Izaya is here."
"Oh. Probably to enjoy my suffering." Kasuka doesn't look bothered about about it. "Or he could be here to see you. What do you want to do?"
Shizuo shakes his head needing a breath of fresh air, at the same time wanting to crawl under a rock and hide away at everything. Pushing open the car door, the blonde climbs out looking down at the greedy unforgiving press of wolves, his brother would be thrown to. "Your boss is a dumbass." Shizuo grunts.
Izaya scent is still there, still str- no it's not. The nostalgic smell is receding, Izaya is leaving. Shizuo looks over the crowd. There's no sign of the signature parker. He can't see anything in the growing crowd. "...Izaya." The distance between them is too great. He can tell his ex is right at the back of the crowd, going in the opposite direction.
Shizuo waits. He doesn't have the energy to go running through the crowd like a bull in a china shop. It's ten seconds before the blonde can move, turning away from everything. Izaya is gone and somehow Shizuo knew it would be like this. Even a goodbye was too much to ask for.
"Stupid flea." Shizuo curses, trudging back to the car. Kasuka is inside with his eyes closed.
"Did you see him?" His brother asks quietly.
"No. Doesn't matter." Shizuo shrugs slumping in the seat. "We're both cowards."
x-x-x
The apartment is empty and so are Izaya's energy reserves. His muscles are cramping from the sudden burst of exercise. With no answer, the ex informant had opened the door the old fashioned way. The apartment itself was bare. It looked strangely like the one he was currently staying in. Everything had gone, leaving it unfurnished for the next tenants to move in.
"Ah. Guess I should have stayed." Izaya groans dropping to his butt. It's going to be hard to move. "Do I want to see him again?" It appeared not with his subconscious working against him. "Why am I running around for that protozoan? Ow." Izaya rolls up his pant leg, using both hands to gently massage his calf.
"Because you still love him?" Anri says quietly. Izaya grimaces turning away.
"Tch. You're an annoying non human."
"You're not going to say goodbye, are you?"
"No." Izaya shrugged smoothing his hand over the rigid muscle. "We've already said our goodbyes. Call a cab. I'll escort you to the hospital."
The teen did as she was told, already on her phone. Izaya sighed leaning back against the wall. "Goodbye, Shizu-chan."
x-x-x
"It's time." Kasuka opened his eyes looking composed. "Let's get this over with. Nii-san, could you stay here?"
"What?" Shizuo asked shocked. "Why? I can come with you-"
"If you're there, you'll lose your temper. Do you remember what you did to the last person that insulted me?"
"That was-" Shizuo shook his head. "Fine. Don't let them get to you."
"You underestimate me, nii-san." Kasuka gave him a small smile, leaving through the open door. "I'll be back soon."
"Good luck." Shizuo returned the smile. The door closed and he was alone. Well the driver was there but sitting like a statue waiting for the next command.
Izaya hadn't shown up. He didn't know why he had been so disappointed when he had felt the raven leave- again. It was over between them. They had already said their goodbyes. There was no need for any more. "Goodbye, flea."
Shizuo closed his eyes listening to the distorted noise outside. "Excuse me, could you put some music on?"
The driver nodded in the mirror, soft soothing music filled the car blocking out the bad stuff outside. Kasuka was right, it would only make him angry.
He didn't know the song but the soft beat worked well with the rhythm- at least he thought so. "Sir, there is someone outside." The driver told him.
The beat was soft rapping against the window. It wasn't Izaya. Shizuo sighed shuffling over to the door. Pushing it open he moved to get out. "What is- you!"
Standing in front of him was a teen so familiar it wrenched his heart. One blue eye, one red gazed down at him. "Hello, Shizuo."