Disclaimer: S.E. Hinton owns The Outsiders, and The Fray owns "Heaven Forbid."

Take a breath, just take a seat
You're falling apart and tearing at the seams

Monday, September 26, 1966

Evie's slender arms wrapped around his middle, and he felt her warm breath on his neck.

"I didn't think you'd be here today," she said.

He turned around and faced her, shutting his locker in the process. She looked so worried, and he didn't want her to be.

"Why not?" he asked, taking her books from her. She looked down and then fit her hand into his.

"It's just kind of soon."

"What else am I going to do?"

There was a tight swelling in his chest, and he did his best to get around it by wrapping his arm around her shoulder and walking her to class.

"Do you know when Johnny's funeral is?" she asked.

The swell tightened and it took him a long time to answer her. He did his best to not picture Johnny lying dead in a box, but the thought haunted him. It was still too hard to accept the face that he was dead.

"Tomorrow," he finally said.

"Want to ride together?"

"I'd like that."

At her classroom door, she kissed him on the cheek and went inside. He stood there for a few lingering seconds and walked to his own homeroom. The fallout from the week before was nearly silent. Instead of Todd Howell applauding in the back of the room, some Soc in a letterman's jacket started clapping obnoxiously in Steve's direction. Under his desk, he balled his fists, his anger seething from images of Johnny lying in that hospital bed to knowing that Ellie was right in saying that things wouldn't really change because of a rumble.

There wouldn't be an announcement about how wonderful a kid Johnny was, and how he was such a hero for saving those kids. There wouldn't be anything at all. The Soc finally stopped his clapping when he got zero reaction out of Steve and when no one else seemed interested in joining in.

XXX

On a Monday morning, he was supposed to be in school, but Two-Bit didn't feel like going. He didn't even feel like goofing off. With the way he was feeling, he wasn't sure he was ever going back to school again. It was as if all the fun of everything was sucked away over the weekend.

He walked along the sidewalks of the neighborhood, not going anywhere in particular, but he found himself in the same place he'd watched Dally try to die in a hail of gunfire like some fucking hero in a goddamn western. In his mind, he replayed the whole scene, only it happened so much faster than it felt that night. In his mind, there hadn't been a way Dally hadn't died.

Walking up the little hill, he slipped under the police tape that had been left up and found the spot Dally had fallen. Blood stained the grass a sickly red. It looked like it was still a little wet, and he felt sick.

"Fuck, Dallas," he said outloud.

He turned on his heel, about to leave but stopped dead when he saw something poking out of a tuft of grass. Slowly, he crouched down and picked up his knife, his pride and joy, his show piece. The blade shot out fast as lightening and Two-Bit studied his reflection in the metal. Standing up, he did a few tricks he'd taught himself over the years and then attacked a tree with the blade, hitting it hard enough to break it.

He walked away with the black handle still in his hand, tearing down the police tape as he left.

XXX

Steve had come and gone. She watched from her bedroom window as he drove away and headed for school. Ellie hadn't bothered going to the door, and no one else in the house woke up when he knocked.

All night long, she hadn't slept more than a couple hours at a time before she was startled out of her sleep by dreams of Dally. She'd been sick once and now she couldn't fall back asleep. She needed to do something to keep her mind occupied, and she settled on one thing.

Getting dressed and gathering an armful of cleaning supplies, she headed over to the Curtises and set up shop. She turned on the oven and evaluated the fridge and the cabinets before she began fixing a casserole.

After she had worked up a sweat, she gave herself a break. She stepped outside and lit a cigarette, hoping it would calm the shaking in her core that hadn't subsided since she saw Dally fall like he did. At her feet were newspapers for the last two days. She picked one up and unrolled it, the Sunday morning headline screaming at her. She couldn't bring herself to read the article, and she tossed it away. The Monday morning edition had a new headline and the stories about Dally, Johnny and Bob Sheldon had been pushed to the third page. Ellie let go of the paper and lit up a second cigarette. She watched the paper flutter across the yard with the crisp breeze and almost cried at how fast those boys became unimportant.

Once she was back inside, she looked around the tiny house and evaluated what she had to do next. Cops and people from the court would be by, without a doubt. Ellie knew what those people looked for. They looked in every nook and cranny to see if Darry was providing a safe, clean home for his brothers. With everything else going on, the cleaning would never happen, and the house was a wreck.

Tying a red kerchief in her hair, she started large and worked to the small, usually unnoticed cleaning - the walls and the baseboards - all the things her grandmother insisted were equally as important as the vacuuming.

Starting on the kitchen floor, she attacked the scuff marks and dried egg from only two days before. She scrubbed and scrubbed, not realizing she had cleaned herself into a corner until it was too late. With wet floor all around her, Ellie sat back on her heels, hugged her knees and broke down.

XXX

All he wanted at that moment was a cup of very strong coffee, and he left Soda with Pony for a few moments as he walked back to the waiting room and stood in front of the coffee dispenser. He dropped in a few coins and waited as the machine filled up a tiny cup with coffee. When it finished filling, he pulled it out and took a careful sip but still managed to burn his tongue.

"Excuse me."

He turned around and found a pretty blonde nurse standing behind him. She was holding a book in her hands.

"You're Ponyboy's brother, right?" She asked.

Darry nodded and felt suddenly alarmed. He tossed the cup of coffee in the trash. "Is he okay?"

He started off, but she laid a hand on his arm and looked at him apologetically.

"Oh, everything's fine. I'm sorry to startle you." She quickly offered him the book. He took it and studied the cover before looking back at her. "It's just that he needs to get that. His friend, Johnny, wanted him to have it."

Darry ran his thumb across the pages and bit his lip thinking about Johnny and his little brother. He couldn't imagine everything that had happened at the little church between them. "I appreciate it."

"I saw his name on the rounds list, and I've seen some of the boys that had come to visit Johnny. I just wanted to make sure he got it. Johnny really wanted him to have it," she said.

She smiled, and Darry was instantly struck by her.

"My name's Allison," she said, extending her hand. Darry shook it.

"Darry," he said.

"It's nice to meet you, Darry. If you need anything, you can let me know."

Darry nodded his thanks and headed back to Pony's room. Once he got back, Soda got up to find his own trouble and Darry sat alone with Pony and the book on his lap. He flipped through the pages again, a folded note falling out into his lap. He studied it for a long time and finally unfolded it enough to read the first line. In handwriting he didn't recognize, he read the first few words over and over again and then stuck it back in the book and put it into his jacket pocket.

"I'll let you find it, little buddy," he said.

He was about to nod off when there was a small knock on the door. He looked up to see Allison standing in the doorway. She had a cup of coffee in her hand.

"The nurses have their own coffee pot," she said. He noticed she blushed a little as she handed it to him. "Most of us would never make it if we had to drink the weak stuff that machine gives out. I hope black's okay."

"That's just fine," he replied, coffee suddenly the last thing on his mind.

She nodded, a small smile on her face and said, "Okay, then. Rounds are starting soon. Someone will be in to check him out soon."

He watched her go and sat back and sipped his coffee as his little brother slept.

XXX

As Darry came back, Soda slipped out. It was hell just sitting there waiting on Pony to wake up, and he needed to get out for just a little bit. Aimlessly, he walked up and down the different hospital corridors and was headed nowhere in particular when he found himself facing the hall toward the ICU. He watched from up against the wall as distraught family members walked back and forth and nurses scurried about. It was awfully quiet in spite of the number of people milling about, and that bothered him. He knew Dally was just through the doors somewhere, but he didn't want to see him. Seeing him get shot was enough. He'd visit with him once he had healed.

Hopping on an elevator, he rode it up and down until someone got off on a floor he hadn't visited. Stepping off, he turned left as the woman who got off turned right. This floor was brighter and people were smiling. He walked on until the wall turned into a pane of glass and he looked in at the newborn nursery. There was an instant tug on his heart as he stopped and leaned his forehead against the glass. His eyes jumped from one little bundle to the next. Closing his eyes against the tears forming in them, he couldn't get Sandy out of his mind anymore than he could erase one of his brothers.

Wiping his eyes, he turned away from the babies and headed back for the elevator and took it back up to his floor. Heading back for the room, he stopped in the hallway, struck by the sight of a fair-haired girl standing with her back to him and talking to Darry in Pony's room. For the briefest of seconds he wondered if Sandy had come back, but then he noticed he nurses' uniform. He didn't know why he expected things to start pulling themselves back together again so quickly.

With a sigh, he ran a hand through his hair and headed back down the hall. He didn't know where he was going, but all he wanted to do was get lost in one of the corridors and stay there until things fixed themselves.

Hold on tight, wait for tomorrow
You'll be alright