I own nothing you recognize. I simply play in JKR's universe for fun.

Bouquets of spring crocuses to Julia and Amrun, who make this a much better story.

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Severus, August 2, 1998

Severus Apparated onto the grounds of Malfoy Manor. He deliberately chose to materialize far up the lane so he that could have a long and leisurely walk to the house. He needed to think, to review the events of the day in his mind.

All things considered, the day had gone far better than Severus anticipated. He had not looked forward to spending the best part of the day in the company of Hermione Granger but he had needed a chance to talk to her to find out how things were going with Draco. Given the potions laboratory in the cellar would not assemble itself, it had seemed opportune to slay multiple birds with one stone.

Allowing Granger to assist him had been a logical choice; she was competent in potions and well organized. If she could keep her mouth shut, follow directions, and refrain from getting on his nerves, she could save him a good deal of work. Severus was confident that after her experience with seven years of intimidation from a master practitioner of the art, he could maintain control of the situation. Besides, he would be damned first before he would accept any help from Potter or Weasley who were about the only other slave labor available.

He had Minerva to thank for transfiguring an assortment of wooden storage boxes, old shelves, and odds and ends of castoffs into suitable laboratory furnishings. He could have done the work himself, but Minerva could do it in less time, with less energy, and better attention to detail. In return, Severus promised her they would indulge in their cigars, Old Ogden's Bronze Reserve, and role-play next weekend. He looked forward to it; Minerva was hilarious after she got a few drinks under her belt.

The day had started earlier for him than it had for Granger. She explained she was trying to stay reasonably close to her Chicago schedule to minimize adjusting to the time change when she returned. That gave Severus time to get the work started, using Dobby to transport equipment and supplies from his private stores and to collect other items belonging to the Order that had been secreted away at Hogwarts. He was relieved to get those particular items off the premises. He did not care to have them discovered during any sort of inspection by the Board of Governors.

Granger had surprised him several times during the day. The first occasion had been when Severus noticed the change in her appearance. She always dressed very differently from most of her peers. The last time he'd seen Ginny Weasley, she'd worn Muggle jeans, a skin-tight t-shirt, and had about three inches of skin showing between them every time she bent over. He was appalled that Arthur and Molly let her out of the house looking like that.

Granger was much more modest, but could let herself get sloppy. He suspected she often forgot about such things while studying or threw her outfit together at the last minute. Perhaps appearance had always been a low priority for her as it had certainly been for himself.

Severus' precision in his work, even as a student, was very important and he let his personal appearance slide to give every second he could to what he considered to be more important things.

Once he began teaching, he realized he had to make an effort to look professional and older. His solution was to buy quality clothing in the same basic style and color. The white high neck shirt with long sleeves, trousers with buttons at the ankles, and black frock coat with an equally high neck and long sleeves became his uniform, covering the Dark Mark and scars that extended up to his neck. The black fabric was magically treated to resist potions stains and wrinkles.

The overall look, when combined with his black hair, dark eyes, and pale skin was intimidating. Having started as a teacher at the tender age of twenty-two, he was barely older than some of his nineteen-year-old Seventh Year students. Combining the intimidation factor with his naturally sarcastic personality aided his ability to control the classroom.

It amused Severus to think that Muggles called his look goth, like they invented it. He was doing goth ten years before the Muggles started copying him.

An important side benefit of his wardrobe was that he never needed to decide what to wear to work. He kept ten sets of clothes, plus his robes for daily wear and two sets of dress robes. When something got ruined or worn out, the house elves had instructions to order a replacement from his tailor. It was a system that worked and required little effort on his part.

After seven years of seeing Granger in her school uniform and student robes, it was a change to see her in college student garb. She had worn jeans with a matching waistcoat and a light blue top with elbow-length sleeves. Seeing her hair pulled back into a snood brought back old memories of his fellow apprentice, Amanda Stuart. She had been in her last two years of apprenticeship when Severus started his.

Amanda was twenty-one when Severus was eighteen. Sharing a love of Potions and research, they had become friends in spite of his youth. Both enjoyed creating new potions or improved variations of old ones. Willing to take advantage of a growing market, they both paid one year of apprentices' fees by making and selling Contraceptus Potion to local apothecaries. Supplying a particular barkeeper with the finest quality wizarding absinthe made from a very old and illegal recipe paid another year's worth.

Arsenius Jigger may have been an exacting Potions Master, but he turned a blind eye to his apprentices skirting the laws in ways he considered relatively harmless.

Upon completing her apprenticeship, Amanda married Everett McKinnon. Severus attended the wedding, hiding the Dark Mark on his wrist beneath his long sleeves. He celebrated alongside her family and friends, even dancing with the happy new bride. Severus hid his dismay at Amanda's choice of a husband. Everett was an Auror, coming from a family of Aurors. Easily one half of the adult McKinnons worked for Magical Law Enforcement.

In 1979, Severus' work for the Dark Lord consisted of making potions at his direction. The close supervision demanded by apprenticeship did not allow Severus the freedom to leave at a moment's notice to participate in Death Eater terrorism. Instead, he prepared a wide variety of potions at Voldemort's command, ranging from recreational hallucinogens to deadly poisons. He explored the Dark Arts under the tutelage of more senior Death Eaters. He was given access to forbidden tomes from Voldemort's own library to search for potions to use in torture and murder.

Severus made a point never to ask how the potions were used.

In the dark days of 1980, Voldemort decided to make an example of the McKinnons. The night he stood in the circle surrounding the Dark Lord, Severus' anxiety grew as he realized what was to come. The Death Eaters were divided into teams to conduct raids on homes all over Britain. The intent was to wipe out the extended McKinnon family all in one night. The raids were intended as a lesson and threat to other Aurors and to flaunt the power of Lord Voldemort in the face of the Ministry.

Severus was no longer exempted from action on the front lines. Voldemort needed every Death Eater to make his plan work. Personally ordered to participate by the Dark Lord, Severus watched in horror from behind his silver mask as Rodolphus Lestrange beat and raped Amanda in front of her husband while Bellatrix tortured Everett. Crucio followed along with other hexes as the Death Eaters watched and laughed. Amanda was four months pregnant when Bellatrix and Rodolphus cast the killing curse on her and Everett.

Severus whispered two silent prayers that night. The first was to end Amanda's suffering. The second was that she never realize that he was one of the men behind a Death Eater's mask.

Voldemort chose this raid deliberately. It was a test of Severus' commitment by forcing him to participate in the murder of his friend and her husband.

By this time, Severus was already completely disillusioned with Voldemort and his Death Eaters. Influenced by Lucius Malfoy, he had joined during his Seventh Year with the intent of preserving Pureblood purity and culture and as an expression of his intense desire to study the forbidden magical arts.

Severus found the reality of serving Voldemort to be very different from his expectations. Instead of an organization committed to political action through acts of terror, the Death Eaters had turned into a haven for criminal psychopaths and sadists who wanted to live out violent sexual fantasies. The depths to which Voldemort was willing to sink to pursue power and immortality were limitless and sickening. The Dark Lord would use every tool, every perversion, any Dark spell or potion to achieve his aims.

Severus knew if Rodolphus had not been present on the raid, he would have been ordered by Bellatrix to perform the rape. She delighted in perverting the youngest and newest Death Eaters. Severus was at a critical point when he participated in his friend's murder. He either had to cast aside all conscience and humanity to become what the other Death Eaters were or had to try and get out of the hideous nightmare he had caught himself in. Severus chose the latter and went to Dumbledore.

How strange that almost twenty years later, one of his students would remind him of Amanda, just because the student changed her hair. Not that Severus would ever confuse Granger with Amanda. They did not look alike and their personalities were entirely different. Besides, Severus kept Amanda's memory fresh in his mind as a part of his penance. Whenever he started to resent the strictures of his life, the damage to his body, or his loneliness, the memory would go into a Pensieve and Severus would make himself relive that night in 1980.

No monk with his knotted cords could flagellate himself more painfully than Severus did to himself emotionally by reliving that memory.

Turning his thoughts from the painful past, Severus considered that Granger could become a real asset. She had proved her worth today when she found the means to identify the leaf. He had already spent several hours going page by page through botany texts looking for a match. In two hours, Granger had found the answer that could have taken him weeks to find.

She was eager to help in any way she could. She took direction well, did not complain when he gave her menial work that could have been completed by the house elf, and even showed initiative without stepping over the boundaries appropriate to an apprentice and master.

Severus stopped in his tracks. In a moment of insight, he understood the dynamic. He understood why it felt so right having her there, doing those tasks, having casual conversation and quizzing her as they worked. She behaved exactly as an apprentice should behave. She was respectful, attentive, accepted his instruction, and participated in the give and take of the work and conversation in the manner he would expect from an apprentice. She had slipped into the role as if she were born for it and in doing so, he had moved into the role of master. It felt as natural as his own skin. That is why he had felt oddly comfortable with accepting the journal, something he would not normally have done.

'I shall indeed be damned,' thought Severus in amazement.

At thirty-nine, he had been a Potions Master for eighteen years. Under normal circumstances, a Potions Master with ten years of experience would have taken his first apprentice. At his level of experience, he could have had as many as three apprentices in the last eight years, at least two of them would have completed their apprenticeships.

Of course, as a single male he would never have accepted a single female as an apprentice. That was just begging for trouble and scandal. And his circumstances were anything but normal, which precluded taking any apprentice. A master and apprentice lived virtually in each other's pockets. Severus could not have hidden his roles as a Death Eater or an Order member from an apprentice. His unexplained last minute disappearances combined with returning from audiences with Voldemort beaten, bloodied, and shaking from Crucio could not be kept secret from someone working so closely with him. However, this was a unique circumstance.

Granger was officially getting her training at Avalon College. She was an Order member who already knew of his role as a double agent. Being eager to serve the Order and having an intense desire to learn everything in the universe, especially about Potions, Granger could offer Severus the best of both worlds. Those periods of time when she returned home to the Weasleys, Severus could avail himself of her services as if she were his apprentice. In exchange for supplementing her college education with real-life experience, he could give her the menial jobs, the tedious forms of research (which she might be able to do with her computer), and save himself hours of labor.

He could even have her brew routine Potions for Hogwarts infirmary. That alone could save him weeks of work every summer and over the winter holidays. She could do it at the lab at the headquarters and would probably thank him profusely for the opportunity. With any luck, this could happen for the next six years. And he would not have to put up with her all the time. Granted, not once today did she get on his nerves, but over time it would inevitably happen. When he had enough of her, he could just ship her back to Chicago. There would be no contract, no obligation on his part.

Not that he would be unfair. He would ensure she had opportunities to expand her skills and learn from his years of experience. He might even learn some things from her, given her training at the college. With a brilliant student like Granger, he believed he could enjoy teaching one-to-one without the interference of House rivalries and poorly chosen friends. The desire to teach another with the potential to excel in Potions development was simply a natural evolution in his professional career.

'Miss Granger,' thought Severus, 'Have I got a proposition for you.'

Severus approached the door of Malfoy Manor with a grin that would make the Cheshire cat envious. Today had been very productive, indeed. Now he needed to refocus on the serious business at hand, which involved an excellent dinner, sophisticated conversation, and an Occlumency lesson for afters.

Pudding escorted Severus to the solarium. The elves had cast the necessary cooling spells to keep the breeze flowing in through the tall windows at a comfortable temperature. Narcissa was her usual lovely self, dressed in a cream colored Grecian gown. Her hair was pulled up with golden cords; allowing tendrils to flow lose in the classic Grecian style. She rose from the wicker settee to greet Severus. He took her hands in his and bowed over them, kissing her left hand.

"Dear Severus, I am so glad you were able to join us tonight." Narcissa directed Severus to sit on the white wicker chair next to the settee. Severus made himself comfortable.

"The pleasure is always mine, Narcissa. There is nowhere I feel more at home than at your table." There was genuine warmth in his voice. "Where are Lucius and Draco?"

"They should be here shortly. They went for a walk down to the lake. I believe they were having a father and son talk."

"Do not try to tell me Lucius has finally decided to explain the birds and the bees," Severus drawled.

"Dear Merlin," Narcissa gave a graceful shake to her head, tendrils bobbing. "Lucius assured me they had that conversation when Draco was twelve. I am hoping they are having a conversation about Draco's use of the credit card we gave him when he left for Avalon."

"Ah. The lad is giving into the temptations of the big city?"

"He has developed a passion for Muggle electronic devices," declared Narcissa, "which he claims is all in the name of research. You would not believe how many of these things he calls CDs and videos he has bought, for purpose of research. Plus, he has bought virtually a whole new wardrobe in the name of research. He has been taking his new friends out to dinner quite a lot, for the sake of research. Now, he wants to buy a car for more research."

"This is only after three weeks in the United States and he has four years to go. I keep telling myself he cannot possibly keep up this pace of spending. My dear son is going to turn us into paupers for the sake of his research," Narcissa laughed.

Severus smiled. "It does my heart good to hear Draco is living up to his heritage as a Malfoy. I seem to remember some wildly extravagant spending by his father in his youth. If I had any weight on me at all at eighteen, it was because Lucius kept me well fed."

"You have the most wonderful metabolism, Severus. It is most unfair to give such a thing to a man when it is we ladies who need it. I continually fight to keep weight off and here we are trying to stuff you silly to keep it on. Speaking of which, I believe Pudding has some appetizers here for you." Narcissa waved the elf over who was carrying a tray with artfully arranged cheeses, sausage, vegetables, prawns, crackers, and Severus' favorite horseradish sauce. The tray was placed before him.

"Can I tempt you with a Long Island ice tea?" asked Narcissa, "It's quite lovely during warm weather."

"As long as it is not one of those prissy teas flavored with guava, peach, or some such absurd thing."

"I promise you, it is nothing like that," replied Narcissa with a mischievous smile. "Last month, Isadora Nott hosted our book discussion club. Our special guest was an American author from New York who writes some of the most enticing fiction. She introduced us to this very enjoyable refreshment. Pudding, would you bring Long Island ice tea for Master Snape and myself? You might as well bring us a jug and some extra glasses. Lucius quite enjoys it."

Severus helped himself to a plate of appetizers, especially of the prawns and sauce. By the time he sampled the first bite, Pudding was back with the jug of Long Island ice tea, a bucket of ice, and four glasses. Severus' sensitive nose picked up on a rather unexpected blend of scents. He gave another sniff.

"Gentle Narcissa, sister of my heart, I do not detect even one iota of tea in this concoction," said Severus suspiciously.

"Dearest Severus, brother of my soul, allow me to pour you a libation. Then you may regale me with your analysis of the ingredients." Narcissa selected a crystal glass and using silver tongs, added three clear ice cubes from the cut crystal ice bucket. She filled the glass to the brim with the liquid from the jug and handed it to Severus.

Severus took the glass and brought it up to his nose, inhaling deeply. He took a careful sip of the icy concoction, rolling the drink on his tongue before allowing it to burn its way down his throat. He took another sip, contemplated for a moment and offered his analysis.

"I detect gin, tequila, rum, and vodka." Severus took another sip. "I believe the four liquors to be in equal proportion," followed by another sip, "And a squirt of fresh lemon," taking a good sized swallow, "With a splash of a Muggle carbonated cola drink I recall from my youth." Another swig followed. "Yes, I stand by my analysis."

He lifted the glass and examined it. "The cola is more for color than anything else. I must congratulate you Narcissa. This drink is a triumph. By the time I finish this glass, my lips will be numb, my brain fuzzy, my judgment impaired, and I shall be quite unable to Apparate. I will be seeking a hangover potion in the morning."

"Excellent! My plan has worked," laughed Narcissa triumphantly.

The two heard the door to the solarium open and saw Lucius stroll in, followed by Draco. Severus rose, a bit unsteady as the quantity of alcohol he had consumed in the last few minutes traveled directly to his brain.

Lucius took a look at Severus, the jug, the glass, and his wife and laughed. He walked to Narcissa and kissed her cheek.

"My love, you have found another victim, have you not?"

"Ah, but he walked so willingly into my trap, snookums."

Lucius, Severus, and Draco looked at Narcissa and said in remarkable unison, "Snookums?"

The four burst into laughter.

"Narcissa, after all these years, you still have the capacity to surprise me," said Lucius, seating himself beside his wife, his arm around her shoulders.

"Good. I'll not have you taking me for granted," she sighed, snuggling into her husband's shoulder.

Draco went to the table and poured two more glasses, handing one to his father.

"Be careful Draco," suggested Severus, "There's enough alcohol in that drink to flatten an acromantula. And you have to get back to the college tonight and be up and functioning in the morning."

"Fortunately, my Potions instructor at Hogwarts had his advanced class prepare Sober-Up and Hangover Potions during our last week before finishing school. The astute fellow seemed to think we might need them," drawled Draco.

"Smart fellow, that Potions instructor," added Lucius, helping himself to a plate and appetizers.

"Apparently not as smart as he would like to be allowing your wife to hoodwink him into drinking half a glass of this tasty brain killing brew," muttered Severus, quite cheerfully.

"Then eat up, Severus. It cannot hurt to dilute the effect by getting some food into your stomach."

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It was considerably later before they got around to the serious conversation. All agreed the Occlumency lesson was out of the question, given the half-buzzed condition they were in. Narcissa and Lucius excused themselves to get some fresh air, tactfully giving Severus time alone with Draco.

"How are things going with you and Miss Granger, Draco?" asked Severus.

"Surprisingly well, sir," he replied, "Without those two idiots around all the time, she's a decent sort. I think she struggled a bit at first without her friends, but I introduced her around and she's done better. I think she's just shy."

Draco took another swig of his Long Island ice tea. "Granger's got the technology down, though. I struggled with that at first, but she really was helpful." He leaned forward and spoke quietly. "Sir, I think the Dark Lord has it all wrong about her. She's not doing Potter and Weasley. She wasn't dating anyone at Hogwarts and she's not chasing men around at Avalon. She's serious and really is a bookworm. Just a bookworm with bad taste in friends."

"It is entirely possible you are correct about Miss Granger, but you must never indicate in any way that you disagree with the Dark Lord's assessment of her," counseled Severus.

"Sir, now that he knows Hermione is there, is he going to hurt her or make me hurt her?"

"I do not believe so. Right now, he wants to know if Potter and Weasley visit. He believes the two of them are using her for sex. If they do not visit her, he will assume her hold on them has diminished. She will be of little interest to him."

Draco looked relieved.

"I know she's Muggleborn. I know she's supposed to be trash." Draco sounded confused. "She just isn't like that. I know it's only been three weeks and it should be too soon for me to be coming to any conclusions about her beyond my seven years of experience with her at Hogwarts."

"She is smart and kind," Draco paused, "To be honest, she got in with Anita Schuler right away. They share a bathroom, for Merlin's sake. She could have frozen me out, said all kinds of nasty things about me. Instead, she invites me to join the two of them for pizza. After all the rotten things I've said to her, said about her, and done to her…."

He looked at Severus with dismay. "You don't think she fancies me, do you?"

It took every ounce of self-control Severus could muster to keep from bursting out laughing, especially given his current blood alcohol level. He could only assume Draco was saying such things because of his own state of intoxication. Severus considered his response very carefully.

"I would wait before coming to a conclusion about that. If she does harbor an interest in you, she will behave in ways that will communicate it. She's a Gryffindor. They cannot act to save their lives."

"I hope she doesn't." Draco was struggling for the right words. "If she did, the Dark Lord could find it in my head and he'd want to use it in some way."

"Draco, the best defense against that is for you to keep from being interested in her."

"I'm interested in Anita. The Dark Lord would be in favor of that, given who her father is."

"Then pursue that interest, Draco. Learn what you can about her father's business and plans for the future." Severus leaned back. "It is getting late and you need to get that Sober-Up and go back to Chicago. When will you be back next?"

"For Mother's birthday. Then I go back for a few more days and finish computer class. I'll have a week off and then the regular term will start."

"Then we will meet next time you come back and a few times during the week before your term begins. We need to practice Occlumency without being under the influence of gin, vodka, tequila, and rum."

"I will sir. I may have been completely irresponsible tonight, but I understand how important it is."

"Then it is time for both of us to return to our respective dwellings. Shall we go and see your parents and then prepare to depart?"

"Severus?"

"Yes, Draco?"

"If I had an uncle in this life, I'd pick you."

"You are drunk, Draco."

"I'm not saying anything I haven't thought when I was sober. I just should have said it when I was sober."

"In that case, thank you. I think of you as a nephew. And we need to stop this or we will embarrass ourselves. I cannot abide soppy drunks and would be forced to disown my new nephew and myself. Let us go find your parents."

"May I call you Uncle Severus?"

"No, you may not."

Severus rose, putting his arm around his honorary nephew's shoulder in affection as well as to steady himself. The two men strolled rather unevenly to the door into the garden.

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Thank you to all my reviewers: Latinachikita, Doodles Divine, Aldara, Rinny08, Joani-the-Unique-Being, PolskaDepresia, Evil Mastermind 666, Phoenix Flight, Merrymagic, Lady Rhian, Severus-Fan, Siren34, Vennea, Jinxed & Cursed, Snapedreamer, Princess Fiona, and Dagworth.

On-going thanks to Duj and Ozratbag2, two wonderful writers who have offered comments and support.