Oh my Dear Readers! So this is it. The final chapter. I'm sorry it took so long to update but as you'll see this is the LONGEST chapter I've written to date! So it did take a while. So while this is the final chapter, there will be one short epilogue to wrap up some loose ends. But then it is on to the next project. I have two stewing in my brain right now so we'll see which one wins out in getting written first. I hope to announce to you which one it is in the epilogue so you can be on the lookout for it, if you so desire! This has been a fantastic voyage and I'm very sad to see it come to a close. I hope I have done Alice and Jasper's story some sense of justice. I tried to stay true to the characters and canon of the Twilight Saga and I think I did. But tell me Dear Readers, do YOU think I did? This author like all authors is very needy and unsure of her work so reviews are the BEST tonic. I thank all of my very faithful readers and reviewers whose encouragement has helped me see this through to the end. I'll have some special awards before the epilogue for some of you! Please, the moment you all have been waiting 24 chapters for…the wedding!
Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.
Visions of Love
Chapter 25: Vows
Alice's POV
It was back. My wedding vision had returned the moment Maria had decided to run. With Jasper's gentle persuasion of course. I hadn't been sure we'd be able to avoid venomshed and it had terrified me to see my own worst nightmare come true…Jazz squared off against Maria, face-to-face. The very thing I'd been trying to avoid.
But I'd been so proud of Jasper—how he'd handled his maker—all without violence. I knew it'd taken all of his willpower to hold back, especially once Maria figured out that Edward and I were different. I'd seen the visions of her bloody vicious plans.
The indifferent coldness with which she'd planned to dispose of Jasper. I'd been hot with a strange mixture of revulsion and the blackest anger I'd ever felt toward another creature. I'd seen Jasper's bloody past but it was a picnic in the park compared to her planned domination.
But none of that mattered now. My warrior vampire had leashed the monster. It was an important step for our new lives—our new quest to truly become Cullens. I knew Carlisle was proud of the way Jasper had handled things—not as thrilled with me trying to fix things on my own. And neither was Jasper for that matter. Or Edward. Sheesh, their overprotectiveness was just a little much. I'd tried to reassure them that I had things perfectly under control but it hadn't stopped either of them from lecturing me a time or two or twenty since we'd returned.
But I was proud of Jazz too. Because I had seen it. His impulse to destroy her. It'd been close. That's why I'd had to cry out, get his attention. If he'd chosen to join her or if he'd decided to destroy her…well, then I had the feeling the wedding vision would have been gone forever.
But he hadn't chosen either of those. He'd chosen me. He'd chosen a life with me. Forever. It was enough to make my breath stop, if I'd been breathing. I looked in the mirror. I didn't recognize the face staring back even though it was supposedly my own. Rose had done an amazing job with my make-up. I put my hand against the ivory satin covering my belly, trying to calm the herd of deer that had taken up residence there and were stampeding all around my inside.
There was still a part of me that didn't really believe this was happening considering what had transpired just the week before. Had it really only been a week since the confrontation with Maria? It felt like it had been a lifetime that I'd been waiting for the wedding to actually happen. And I guess in a way it had. Two lifetimes. One I didn't remember. The other I didn't want to remember until that rainy day in Philadelphia when Jazz had swaggered into my life. And then of course when the Cullens had come into both of our lives.
It was more than I'd dared hoped or dreamed it would be. And now my day was finally here. Or our day. Even if Jazz didn't think he wanted to do it. He'd thank me later. Hopefully in some delightfully wicked ways.
I turned away from the full-length mirror and walked toward the window wall in our tower room that overlooked the backyard. It looked like a fairy wonderland. Esme and I had transformed it with yards and yards of draped white fabric and thousands of white flowers of all kinds—daisies, tulips, roses, and on and on. I think we'd cleaned out every flower shop in Alaska and maybe a few in Canada. Every arch, every bouquet was wrapped in twinkling white lights.
There were no chairs. It really wasn't necessary. The Cullens were the only guests. Rose was my matron of honor. Emmett was standing with Jasper. Edward was in charge of music. Esme had a circular stage painted in white built and Edward's grand piano had been moved to that stage. It stood beside the massive white gazebo again draped in gauzy white fabric and covered in flowers and lights. That's where the ceremony was to be.
God, I hoped Jazz was ready. Oh, I knew he wasn't going to run off. But I'd decided that I wanted us to each write our own vows. Mine were easy. They'd been written on my unbeating heart the moment I'd seen him in my first vision of us. But when I'd told him of my plan for us to recite our own vows rather than the old till-death-do-us-part routine—which frankly I felt didn't really apply in our situation—I'd seen the panic settle deep in his ochre eyes.
We'd been in the tower room, reaffirming our joy in having avoided disaster with Maria and just being together. It'd been electric and now we were wallowing in the glow on our mattress, looking up at the stars. We'd decided to postpone the wedding to the following Saturday to give everyone a chance to get their bearing after our close call. That was when I'd decided I didn't want those stuffy old vows. I wanted to never miss the chance to really tell Jazz how I felt, to bind myself to him in our own way—forever.
"Jazz, do you love me?" I put my plan into action. My fingers were drawing patterns across his sculpted chest. I purposely kept my voice light. He had an arm wrapped around my shoulders and I felt his grip tighten on my upper arm. He tilted his head to look down at me, a look of surprise on his face. I looked up at him, trying to keep my eyes wide, my look innocent. "Pixie, you don't even have to ask. You know I do." The web was spun. He leaned down and placed a lingering kiss on my forehead. I had to close my eyes briefly as the electricity flowed through me. Even the most innocent of his touches sent shockwaves through me. I quickly regrouped, opened my eyes wide and caught my bottom lip between my teeth, seemingly uncertain.
"What's all this, pixie?" I could see his concern as his brow puckered and he brought his thumb up and gently pulled my lip from my teeth. I looked down and then looked back up peeking at him through my lashes. I was in full pixie mode for sure now. But I was determined to get what I wanted.
I gave a small tentative smile. "Well, I've been thinking…" I could see the "uh-oh" in his eyes, the small tic in his jaw as he tried to suppress a smile, not quite succeeding. At least, he knew when he was in trouble. And seemed resigned to it. A small sigh escaped his lips and his eyes rolled toward the glass ceiling where the moon shone down on us from. I had to bite my tongue to keep from giggling at his put-upon expression.
"Go on." His deep baritone held a glint of amusement. I kept drawing patterns on his chest and kept my gaze concentrated there. Once I actually told him what I wanted, I wasn't quite sure I actually wanted to see the look on his face. I could just imagine…
He brought his free hand up and captured my drawing hand, stilling my motions with a light squeeze. He then brought my hand up to his lips and placed a hot, fervent kiss in the palm. I gasped and looked up then as my toes curled. Oh, this was never going to get old, not for a million, billion, zillion years.
I took a deep breath and then just let it all spill out in one trilling quick succession. "Well, I've been thinking that I'd really love it if we did something a little different during the ceremony instead of all those stuffy old better or worse, sickness and health, richer or poorer vows because I mean they don't really apply to us especially that whole till death do us part part, well dontchathink?" I stopped, not because I needed a breath but because I'd looked up and seen the crease between his brows. I could tell he was trying to work out what I was getting to.
"I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'd really, really love it if we wrote our own vows. For the wedding. For each other." The crease grew as he frowned slightly, realizing what I was asking. I knew I was asking a lot of a soldier cowboy warrior vampire. But I knew he had it in him. Even if he didn't. Yet. I could already see each argument, he was about to put up. One of the advantages of having visions of the future. And I was prepared.
He opened his mouth, ready to argue. I brought up a hand and covered his mouth with my fingers. "Shh. Wait. Hear me out, cowboy. I know you don't think you can do it. You think you're not good with words. What was it you said to me in Philadelphia? You're more comfortable with actions. But you can do this. You don't have to write pages and pages. Just say what's in your heart. That's all I ask. It's all I'll ever ask of you. So if you love me, you'll do this just one teensy-weensy little thing I ask. You said it was my day after all and I could have whatever I want."
I grinned impishly at him and his shoulders sagged in defeat. My soldier was smart. He knew when he was surrounded. Then he'd looked down at me and nodded his head in assent. "Okay," he'd whispered. And then I'd reached up to mold my lips to his and reminded him of why he loved me enough to make me happy.
I was shaken out of my memory at the light knock on the door. I turned just as Rosalie peeked her head in. "Oh good, you're decent." She opened the door wider and glided in. She wore a gunmetal silk gray YSL dress that draped her perfect figure in all the right places. The halter top had a plunging neckline with folds of the soft fabric cascading like waterfalls. She looked breathtaking and I was happy that Esme and I had made the right choice on our short outing to Paris when we'd snagged the billowing strapless masterpiece that was my wedding dress.
"Wow, Rose, you look stunning." She smiled knowingly and I saw the fierce pride in her eyes. She'd left her hair down but had a white orchid tucked behind one ear and slightly shook her blonde waves. "Thanks. But look at you…that dress, amazing. You look gorgeous." And I could tell she meant it because she had that grudging tone in her voice. I beamed at her and tripped quickly to close the distance and pull her into a quick hard hug. She stiffened in surprise at first. Affection was not Rose's gift. But then she relaxed and I felt her bare arms come around and give me a light pat on the back before quickly stepping back.
"Well, look at my two beautiful daughters. Okay, if I come in?" Carlisle was standing in the doorway. Rose and I turned to face him and I beamed at the sight. He looked incredibly dashing in his gunmetal gray tux with the gray-striped full tie tacked with a gleaming emerald tie-tack. It matched my engagement ring and the emerald necklace that was nestled against Rosalie's chest.
Carlisle was one of those people who truly seemed to have an ethereal light about him all the time. I think it was his goodness that just shone out of him due to nothing that he did. It was simply him. He was what was best about this world. Vampire or not.
"Of course!" My voice squeaked and then I skipped to him and threw my arms around his waist as he walked into the room. I heard the strains of Vivaldi as Edward began to play the piano. I knew that meant that it was close. I'd planned that the ceremony would begin at twilight. My favorite time of day. Or night. Whatever it was. And I could see the shadows, the setting sun was casting all around the tower room.
Carlisle's strong voice cut through my thoughts. "Well, you both look stunning. I'm so happy for you Alice. And I'm so happy that you and Jasper are a part of our family. We may not have realized we were missing anything, but now that you are both here, I know now that we were. We're complete now. And Esme and I couldn't be prouder of you or the rest of our children." I felt the stinging in my eyes of tears that couldn't be produced. I squeezed him tighter and tucked my head against his chest. "Thanks Carlisle," was all I could manage to get out.
"Okay, enough of that. We've got to make sure you're ready to walk down that aisle like a rock star bride." Rose's tone was no-nonsense. I didn't dare argue with her. I let Carlisle go as he gave my back one last fatherly pat and stepped away. I whirled around and said, "Well? Am I ready?" Rose had her tilted to one side giving me a critical once-over.
"Wait!" She cried out. "Holy smokes, Alice, we nearly forgot your veil!" My hands flew to the top of my head. She was right! I'd been so caught up in my memories of the vows with Jasper that I'd completely forgotten. She walked over to the full length mirror where the tiara and veil were resting and was back to me in a flash, pinning it in my short hair that she'd somehow managed to get to lie flat after hours of flatirons and hair product.
"Perfect." She breathed. "Look." She grabbed my wrist and led me to the mirror. I couldn't believe that it was me. The tiara and veil made the picture complete. I truly looked like the stereotypical radiant bride. Couldn't say "blushing" bride since I couldn't blush anymore. But definitely radiant. I was glowing and my eyes were bright and happy.
Carlisle was looking out the back wall and said, "Okay girls, I think it's time to start. Esme's giving me the sign." And before I knew it, we were at the head of the aisle. Edward was playing an original composition of his own that he'd played for me the night before. It was my wedding gift from him and it was stunningly beautiful. "I call it 'Alice in Wonderland'" he'd said as he smiled crookedly at me as I sat beside him on the piano bench. "Well, that definitely has a nicer ring to it than 'Alice in Gustavus'" I'd teased him, bumping his arm with my elbow. But I'd been beaming at him because it was one of the most amazing gifts I'd ever received. My very own musical composition! And he was going to play it as I walked down the aisle to join my soldier. My mate. I took a deep breath, my vows ringing in my ears as I took the first step toward my destiny.
Jasper's POV
I felt like I was choking. Damn fool monkey suit! I reached up and tugged at the tight collar with my index finger. I was sure if it was physically possible, I would be sweating buckets about right now. I could feel Emmett shaking with suppressed laughter as he elbowed me in the side. Hard. I took my finger out of my collar and reciprocated. Hard. But I aimed more for his solar plexus and I felt a smidgen of satisfaction when I heard his quiet "Oof!". Good, took him by surprise. It was so much more satisfying going after Emmett instead of Edward. Edward always knew exactly what my next move was.
But Edward was on the stage next to the gazebo where Emmett and I were standing with Carlisle's minister friend from London, Victor Cambridge. Edward had begun playing some classical music piece. It sounded vaguely familiar but I had to admit that classical music wasn't high on my list of topics I could knowledgeably discuss. But now that he had started playing, it was real. This was going to really happen. Any minute, Carlisle was going to be marching my pixie bride down the aisle. Hell's bells, I was about to get hitched!
And to think, just a week ago, I hadn't been so sure that it really would happen. Alice had scared the bejeezus out of me going after Maria on her own. I still wasn't entirely sure how I had kept myself from ripping Maria limb from limb. But I think it mostly had to do with Alice. Not wanting to disappoint her in any way. And even though she would've understood, I still don't think she would've exactly been proud if I had resorted to my violent side that seemed to come so naturally before she waltzed into my life.
And I really wouldn't have wanted that dark cloud to be hanging over us as we started our new life together. Knowing Maria as I did, she'd known when she was outnumbered and if nothing else, she was a survivor and master manipulator. She wouldn't bother us again. Not as long as Alice and I were with the Cullens. Which was pretty much looking like it might be forever now that we'd made it to this point—flowers by the bushel everywhere, twinkling lights, mounds of gauzy white fabric, a minister, music. All that was missing was my beautiful bride.
Esme had been fussing with last minute arrangements of flowers and fabric and well—whatever girls fussed with at weddings but she'd stepped toward the gazebo. She flashed a beaming brilliant smile on Emmett and me, her eyes shining in such a way that I knew they'd be filled with tears if she could cry. I smiled back, my gaze steady and sure.
You couldn't help but love Esme. She was the kindest, most caring mother-figure a vampire could ask for. And she looked lovely in a pale ice-blue silk suit, her caramel-colored waves flowing around her shoulders. It was easy to see how Carlisle could have fallen for her. I saw her give a quick wave up toward the second floor. That must have been the gesture for the Carlisle, Rose and Alice to come down. That meant it was time.
Suddenly, the music changed and it was "Alice in Wonderland". A song written especially for my pixie. It suited her. I'd heard it first when Edward had played it for Alice the night before. It was his wedding gift to her and honestly I didn't see how it could be topped. The complex, tinkling notes were light-hearted in tone and sounded exactly like a pixie dancing around a fairy meadow. In fact, I could just picture my pixie dancing her way to me as the notes swelled and echoed around the trees as twilight descended on the cool Alaskan night.
And then there she was. My breath stopped. I was vaguely aware that Rosalie was gliding down the aisle at the human pace Alice had insisted on. I was minutely aware that my pixie's arm was threaded through Carlisle's--that he was walking her down the aisle as any proud papa might. But my eyes caught with Alice's and the world stopped around us.
It was as if we were in our own bubble, just the two of us. Almost exactly as it had been since that first moment she'd slipped her hand into mine in that diner long ago—when her eyes had met mine that first time—her first grin—our first kiss. It seemed so long ago and yet also as if only a second had passed since then. That's kind of how it was with vampire time. When eternity stretched out in front of you, it was sure going to be nice to finally have someone to spend it with.
And not just anybody. My Alice. My pixie. My love. She'd saved me that day in Philadelphia in so many ways. It was going to take an eternity just to show her my gratitude. Starting now.
The music had stopped. I hadn't even realized that she and Carlisle had reached the gazebo steps. Reverend Cambridge was speaking but I only caught the tail end of it…"who gives this woman away?" Carlisle glanced at Esme and then turned back to us stating in a sure voice, "Her mother and I do." I noticed that Edward had quietly slipped to Esme's side. Then Carlisle grabbed Alice's hand resting in the crook of his elbow, stretching it toward me.
As if in a fog, I felt my own arm shoot out and I noticed that my fingers were slightly trembling as Carlisle placed her tiny hand in my own large one. Strange…I felt as if I were outside of myself watching this ritual take place. Then I looked up and into Alice's beaming heart-shaped face, her eyes bright, her smile wide and I was completely present in the moment. It was as if my soul (if I had such a thing), snapped back into my body like a taut rubber band. That's all I'd needed. The touch of my pixie. That's all it ever took to make me a better man than I'd ever dreamed of being.
All too quickly, the good reverend had turned to me and I knew it was time. Time to say my vows. The vows Alice had insisted we write ourselves. I really wanted her to go first. I could feel her grip on my hands tighten. Then she began rubbing her thumb across the backs of my hands, trying to reassure me. I felt one corner of my mouth tilt up at the thought. Each of us always seemed to be trying to do that for the other.
I wondered if there'd ever be a time that both of us would just trust in the other's feelings. Well, I was going to do my damndest to make sure she never had to doubt how I felt about her for the rest of our days. Besides, I wasn't unsure of my feelings. I was just uncomfortable with all the attention on me. And I was completely afraid I was going to muck this up. I could feel my throat flex convulsively as I tried to open my mouth and say my vows. I could feel everyone's eyes on me and I suddenly felt like I'd been thrown into a lake of fire.
I stared desperately into Alice's eyes trying to convey all that my vows said about my undying love to her so that she'd know that the reason I couldn't speak had nothing to do with my feelings. Suddenly her eyes widened and she nodded in mute acknowledgement. This is when it came in handy to be able to manipulate feelings and to have someone who could see the future.
With one last gentle squeeze of my hands, she turned her head to the dashing Reverend Cambridge whose looks were as dark as Carlisle's were light and just as handsome. Or so I'd gleaned from Esme as she'd gushed over him when he'd come to stand in the gazebo. "I'll go first. I can't keep them in any longer!" Her singsong voice rang out and everyone's eyes swiveled from me to her and I could see the initial surprise. But then, almost in unison, they all shook their heads and chuckled. I think everyone would've been a little disappointed if it had played out any differently.
Reverend Cambridge turned to me, his eyebrows raised in question. I just nodded my agreement, still unable to muster a sound. "Okay, Alice, please, now is the time to give your solemn vow to Jasper." His voice was deep, rich with the decades he'd lived. Alice smiled at him and he returned her smile. The good feelings were flowing nice and strong all around. I was almost giddy with all the happiness.
Then Alice trained her gaze back on me and her smile dimmed a bit but there was still a hint of it at the corners. I saw her draw a deep breath. I kept my gaze focused on her face. I had a feeling that the burst of words that were about to come flowing out of my pixie's mouth would be in such a blur I wouldn't know what she said if I didn't pay complete attention. And then she surprised me. As always.
"Jasper, from my first glimpse of our future together, I knew I loved you. Some people say that love is written in the stars. But ours was written on my heart. You are my first good memory and I can't wait for us to make even better memories. Together. I will always be here for you. No matter what. And I will always believe in you. No matter what. And someday I'll convince you that you are good Jazz. At your core, where it counts, you are the best of all that is good." My gaze dropped from hers at that fervent assertion. I couldn't help but feel a little ashamed that she seemed to truly believe that about me.
She squeezed my hands and I looked back into her eyes. And then I was lost. "And I can't wait to spend the rest of my days just showing you how much I love you and proving to you how wrong you are about yourself, cowboy. And you know I always get my way. No matter what." And then the little minx winked at me. That didn't seem too solemn-like. But I knew that the depth of her feelings were incredibly solemn. I could feel it all the way through my bones and deep into my dead heart.
I wanted to lean in and capture her lips in a fierce kiss. That was how I operated. She looked at me, her eyes full of love and…expectation. Oh, so she was finished. My turn. I'd written mine down, not sure I could trust myself to remember. On a battlefield, I had nerves of steel. To speak in front of even my family, I had the backbone of a jellyfish.
But as Alice looked at me, I knew that I couldn't read those vows. She deserved better than that. And then I decided. I was going to do something I would've never done on the battlefield. I was going to wing it. Say what was in my heart. I half-smiled down at her, now or never. No, definitely forever.
"Alice, the first day we met, I told you I was a man of action, not words so I have to start by asking you to forgive me because I know what I say will be a gross injustice to you and letting you know exactly how I feel." I couldn't look away from her eyes and she shook her head slightly and frowned a little at my words. I took a deep breath and opened my mouth and then my solemn vow to bind me to her forever was made.
"That day that you were waiting for me, you said I had kept you waiting a long time. And although at the time, I didn't completely understand what you meant, now I do. Because I realize now that you kept me waiting too. Until you came into my life, I was just existing, subsisting. There was no meaning for me. But you've changed all that. You are my meaning. And I've just been waiting all these years for you. You've made me believe that I can be better and I don't ever want to disappoint your faith in me. I want to be there for you no matter what and in whatever way you will let me for the rest of our days. The goodness and light that shine out of you make my burdens lighter and I hope I can be that for you too. You balance me in a way that no one else ever has and even though I know I don't deserve it, I want this life with you more than anything else I've ever dreamed possible. You're my pixie. My life. My love. And I do love you. My heart, such as it is, is yours. Forever. I vow to always be beside you, to always treasure you and the good things you give me, to protect you, and to love you unconditionally, even when you're doing your best to rile me up." I tilted one corner of my mouth up at that and she grinned impishly back. "I now know what the mean when they say "my better half" because you're mine. I'm not whole without you and I'm not good without you. But with you, I feel like I can be exactly the kind of man I should be." Then I mouthed to her "Love you pixie" and she mouthed back "Love you too, soldier."
The rest of the ceremony passed in such a blur that I honestly was only waiting for that moment when Reverend Cambridge was going to tell me I could seal our vows with a kiss. I know that we exchanged rings and Emmett made a big show of not being able to find them until Rosalie had growled at him and Alice giggled. Then before I knew it, the good reverend was pronouncing us husband and wife and finally gave me what I'd been waiting all day for, permission to kiss my bride! I lifted my pixie up until her face was even with mine and then captured her lips in a fervent, hot promise of many more to come. Our family was cheering and clapping but I took no notice. I finally only let her go when the reverend cleared his throat.
Alice pulled her face back and looked into my eyes. I'm sure we both had the biggest goofiest grins on our faces ever. But we'd done it. We were married. We'd overcome so many obstacles in such a short time. And now we had an eternity to fulfill as many of Alice's visions of love that we could. Well, at least as soon as I could persuade her to leave the reception and start making other kinds of human memories…