Not Listening

by TheBucketWoman

Disclaimer: I do not own Life with Derek or anything else I may reference herein. No profit is being made nor is any infringement intended.

Chapter Twenty-five.

Part One: Emily.

It snowed a little on Monday afternoon, stopping shortly before the last bell. It was just enough to coat the cars and buses and make the graying slush on the unsalted bits of sidewalk look clean again. It served to clear the air so that Emily couldn't smell the exhaust from the cheese buses and by the time they got outside, it was cold and dry.

But leave it to Sheldon to find the one ice patch on the ground and slip on it. As he went down, so did Emily and he let out an "oof" as she sprawled on top of him. Her palms stung as they hit the little crust of snow and concrete. The mortification didn't kick in until she'd satisfied herself that Sheldon was okay.

"Are you sure?" she asked.

"I've been worse," Sheldon said.

"Worse than me elbowing you in the stomach?" Emily said, looking around to see how many people had noticed them. Luckily, they were far enough away from the school for few people to notice and no one to really care.

"Some people would call a cute girl landing on me the highlight of my day," Sheldon said.

She cracked a smile and shoved him.

"Ow," he said, clutching his abdomen.

"Oh my God!"

"No, I'm kidding," he said, holding out his hands first to stop her from freaking out, then to ward off a few hits. They got most of the way down the block before she stopped trying to smack him and were right near Smelly Nellie's before Emily could work the conversation back to where it had been before he fell down.

"So about your birthday," Emily said.

"What about it?"

"What do you wanna do?" she asked. "Gonna have a party? What?"

"I have, like, three friends," Sheldon said. "And my parents never leave town, so the party thing doesn't really work as an idea."

"Don't you wanna do something special?" Emily asked.

"I dunno. Maybe if I'm lucky, I get to pick the pizza toppings," Sheldon said. "Can't really do much on a Tuesday night, you know?"

"What about the weekend after?" Emily asked. Did she have to hit him over the head or what?

"What? Wanna do something?"

Ding, ding, ding, Emily thought. "That was what I was getting at, yeah. What kind of girl would I be if I didn't make a little fuss over my boyfriend on his birthday, as old as he makes me feel?"

"You're two months older than I am," Sheldon said. "Hardly qualifies you for cougar status."

"Says you," Emily said. "Now why don't you buy an old lady a hot chocolate?"

"As long as you promise not to stuff all the sugar packets into your purse again," Sheldon said.

"I make no promises," Emily said.

He held the door open. "After you, Mrs. Robinson."

Smelly Nellie's felt so wonderful and warm after they'd been out in the cold. Once they settled into a booth, Sheldon grabbed both of Emily's hands and rubbed them. It was such a daddy move that once again she had to giggle over the fact that he was only about to turn fifteen.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing," she said, looking him in the eye. Before she got a chance to stand up and lean over the booth to kiss him, Casey showed up.

"Oh my gosh, Em, I'm so glad I caught you!" Casey said, sliding into the booth next to Sheldon, completely oblivious to what had been going on before she got there. As usual.

"Hi Casey," Sheldon said.

"Hey," Casey said. "So Emily, I was wondering if I could get some advice. I've been wanting to ask you all day, but there were too many people around."

"Um," Emily said, glancing at Sheldon. On one hand, it sounded like Casey wanted to tell her something juicy, on the other hand, she had a perfectly good Schlepper going to waste across from her.

"Or I can just get lost," Casey said, realizing that she was in the way.

"What is it?" Sheldon asked even though his face screamed "Get lost."

Casey didn't need to be asked twice. "I'll be quick. Derek's birthday's a week from Friday and I'm drawing major blanks here. I was gonna throw him a party, but Sam said that was a bad idea."

"How come?" Sheldon asked.

"I don't know," Casey said. "Sam said Derek doesn't really like parties, but look how many he goes to. I don't get it."

"He does tend to hide in kitchens," Sheldon said.

"Or closets," Emily joked.

"Ew," Casey said. "So okay, yeah, no party."

"Gift card?" Sheldon said.

"I have never given anyone a gift card in my life," Casey said, pointing a finger at Sheldon. He would have backed up if there was anywhere to go. "I don't plan on starting now. Those are way too impersonal. But the problem is that I don't know enough about him to get him something he really wants and I figured that the two of you have known him since you were little, so..."

"We're not exactly what you'd call close," Sheldon said.

"I thought he went to your bar mitzvah," Casey said.

"He did. To hit on Hannah Hirsch," Sheldon said. "And Melanie Weiss. And my sister..."

"Well, that still makes you closer than I am," Casey said.

"If you say so," Sheldon said.

"How 'bout you, Em," Casey said. "You know Derek pretty well."

Sheldon rolled his eyes. Before they'd officially started going out, Emily had made the supreme mistake of telling him about her crush on Derek and he'd been smart enough to intuit how far the crush went, what with the sign language classes and all. So it wasn't hard to figure out that the last thing Sheldon wanted to be talking about was Derek.

"You know Sheldon's birthday's next week, too," Emily said, trying to change the subject.

"Really?" Casey asked. "Sixteen?"

"Fifteen," Sheldon said.

"Are you, like, the youngest in the grade?" Casey asked.

"Probably," Sheldon said. This was so not the way to his heart, Emily knew.

"When is it?" Casey asked, whipping out her organizer.

"Tuesday," Sheldon said. He looked surprised that she seemed interested. "The thirteenth."

"Derek's is Friday the sixteenth," Casey said, marking the date. "He's gonna be sixteen. Hey. Sixteen on the sixteenth!"

Sheldon looked at Emily in disbelief.

"But you know," Casey continued. "You and Derek are total Sagittarians."

"I know, right?" Emily asked, looking over at Sheldon. The poor kid's eyebrows were up as far as they could go.

"Not that I believe in that zodiac stuff," Casey said.

"Oh, of course not," Sheldon said. Emily was really going to have to make up for this weirdness later.

"So what are you gonna do for your birthday?" Casey said. "I wonder if it totally sucks that it's so close to Christmas, and Hanukkah. When is Hanukkah this year? Has your birthday ever fallen smack in the middle of it so that people give you combo gifts?"

"Um," Sheldon said, looking a little confused. "Yeah. Happens once in a while. Not this year, but I'm a big fan of gelt so it usually doesn't matter."

"Gelt?" Casey asked.

"Those little chocolate coins in the gold foil," Emily said.

Both of them looked at her.

"What?" she asked. "I know stuff. For a shiksa."

"Shiksa goddess," Sheldon teased.

"Aww," Casey said, looking at Sheldon like she only just noticed that he was cute. "Where can I get one of these?"

"You want a shiksa goddess?" Sheldon asked. Emily couldn't tell whether or not he was playing dumb. Sometimes he just plain spaced out.

"No! Or...the boy version at least," Casey said.

"Okay," Sheldon said. "I wondered for a second there. So what were we talking about?"

"Derek," Casey said. "And his birthday. You guys have no idea?"

"Nope," Sheldon said.

"Not really," Emily said. "I'll think about it, though."

"Thanks," Casey said. "You're a lifesaver." She stuffed her organizer back into her bag and a look of hope started to show on Sheldon's face.

"I try," Emily said.

"What were you guys up to before I showed up?" Casey asked, making herself comfortable.

"Casey!" Sheldon said.

"Kidding," she said, zipping her coat back up. "I'm going! You two just...carry on."

Emily groaned.

"Just keep doing what you were doing," Casey said, an evil grin on her face.

"I don't think I remember what we were doing," Sheldon said watching Casey leave.

"I'm sure I can jog your memory," Emily said. She tried to play footsie but her aim was a little off and she ended up kicking him with her boot.

"Sorry!"

"No worries," he said, reaching over to rub his leg.

Part Two: Casey.

Kendra stayed for dinner again. Casey was starting to wonder if her parents would tell her if they'd adopted another kid.

Seriously, Kendra, do you have a home? Casey wondered. 'Cause you should really go there. Then she berated herself for being mean. It probably wasn't Kendra's fault that she rubbed Casey the wrong way. It wasn't really anything she'd done, Casey didn't think. In fact, Kendra had finally decided to stop teasing Casey about her supposed reunion with Sam. The only problem was that she was doing it in an "I'm not teasing you," way. Sort of like the "I'm not touching you," game, but worse. She looked pointedly at Casey whenever Sam was mentioned, with a "you can't fool me" look on her face.

After dinner, Casey tried to finish How the Garcia Girls Lost Their Accents while Derek and Kendra made out right next door. She tried closing her door, but mere walls were no match for Kendra Mason's giggle. Casey actually worried that the girl would never leave when George reminded both of the lovebirds that it was a school night. Because George was awesome.

Casey was ten pages from the end of the book when she was distracted yet again.

"So have the two of you idiots lost your minds?" Derek asked. He asked it out of nowhere. She knew that he'd been downstairs getting almost beaten by Lizzie at some kind of violent video game—they all ran together in Casey's mind. So she thought he'd be down there until George wrestled the controller out of his cold, dead hand. He wasn't supposed to be up here this early, much less leaning against the jamb in her doorway, bugging her.

Casey wanted to say something about putting statements into context being a good thing, but it came out as "Huh?"

"You and Sam," Derek said, rolling his eyes.

"What about me and Sam?" Casey asked. "Don't tell me you picked this moment to listen to your girlfriend."

"No changing the subject," Derek said. "Ain't none of this about me. I mean, I don't care what you do, but it's my job as a best friend to keep Sam out of trouble. And you are trouble." He signed the word "trouble" and pointed at her.

"I'm trouble?" Casey asked. "You're calling me trouble?"

"Turned him into a nail-biting super-keener like yourself," Derek said. "That is, when he didn't think you were cheating on him."

"Whoa!" That was a low blow.

"I'm not saying he was right about that," Derek interrupted, holding up a hand to stop her from yelling. "But you made him crazy, and we do not need that."

It was hard to figure out what was worse, Derek sticking his nose where it really did not belong, or the idea that she would do anything to hurt Sam. That she still wasn't good enough for his friend, even though they were not back together and had no plans to get back together, was insulting on a few levels.

"You just need to leave," Casey said, pushing him from her doorway and shutting the door on him. His door slammed in response.

Crap, she thought. I didn't tell him no. Which meant that she needed to warn Sam before Derek had a chance to go after him.

"Hellooo," Sam said when he picked up.

"Hey," Casey said. "Sam, listen. You're about to get a text or something from Derek."

"An IM," Sam said. "In progress. And it's all caps, too."

"Crap," Casey said. "I'd hoped to warn you."

"Meh," Sam said. "A couple of exclamation points never killed anyone."

"What are you telling him?" Casey asked.

"I'm waiting for him to stop sending me paragraphs," Sam said. "What should I tell him? How bout 'Casey and I are getting married in Vegas and there's nothing you can do to stop us?' or 'She's pregnant," or should I just go with the truth and tell him I'm freaking tutoring you and to take a pill?"

"Either of the first two would kill him," Casey said.

"What about both of them?" Sam asked.

"No!" Casey yelped. She heard laughing and clicking of keys and Sam muttering "take. a. pill." to himself as he typed.

"Now he thinks 'tutoring you' is a euphemism for something else," Sam said.

"Ew!" Casey said. Sam laughed. Then Casey felt her stomach drop as something occurred to her.

"Sam?"

"Yeah."

"You don't want to get back together do you?"

"Um, no, Case. As much as I do like you, no."

"Okay," Casey said. "I just wondered if you'd be insulted by that 'ew.' I didn't mean it like that you know."

"I know."

"Would you have said anything if you were insulted, because people tell me I can be kind of oblivious sometimes—"

She was interrupted by the sound of stifled laughter.

"Hey!" she said, causing him to lose control and start laughing harder. It went on for almost a minute.

"Okay, I get the point," Casey said.

"Oh, wait," Sam said. "He finally got around to asking what I could possibly be tutoring you in. Talk about oblivious."

"You're not gonna tell him!"

"Um, I just did," Sam said. "Was it a secret?"

"Well," Casey said. "Not so much a secret. More like..."

"What?" Sam said. She could hear the grin in his voice. "Like a surprise?"

"Sam."

"That's just—" he trailed off into more laughter. "You two are idiots. And my sides are starting to hurt."

"Sam!"

"If I get a hernia and miss the rest of hockey season it'll be you guys' fault, is all I'm saying," Sam said.

"What's he saying now?" Casey asked, changing the subject.

"I think I might have just rendered him speechless," Sam said. "Oh wait...he says 'are you serious?' I'm telling him to take his head out of his ass."

"Good luck with that," Casey said. She knelt down and reached into the spot between her bed and her nightstand and slid open the vent. It wasn't the most brilliant idea to try to eavesdrop on a Deaf person, perhaps; she knew that Derek did not often waste time talking if he didn't have to. But for some reason, she had to know what he was doing in there. Was he just typing or was he pacing in between? Growling? What? It was just too bad that she couldn't really see into his room from there. Then again, maybe that was a good thing because if she couldn't see into his room, he couldn't see into hers either. She wasn't planning on having to change all of her hiding places for another month or so.

"Now he's all embarrassed, I think," Sam said.

"How can you tell?"

"Because you know how the IM window shows that someone's typing?" Sam asked. "He keeps typing and not posting. He can't think of anything to say. Which means...yep!"

"What?"

"Just straight up apologized," Sam said.

"Are you sure you're really talking to Derek?"

"Come on," Sam said. "You know him better than that. When it's really important, he apologizes. Not that he usually realizes when he's wrong, but on those rare times when he does, he cops to it."

She had to admit that it was true.

"Anyway," Sam said. "His birthday's coming in a couple weeks, and he wants to keep everyone who might have cash to spend on him happy. So you're probably next."

"I don't have any money," Casey lied.

"He doesn't need to know that," Sam said.

"He probably already checked my wallet," Casey said. "That's what he does to Edwin."

"Yeah, that sounds about right," Sam said. "So what are you gonna do: wait for him to come to you with the apology or go bug him?"

"Who says I'm going to do anything?" Casey asked.

"Casey," Sam said.

"Don't do that," Casey said. "Do not act like you have me all figured out, because you don't."

"Mmhmm," Sam said.

"And don't 'mmhmm' me either," Casey said. "That's just as bad."

"If you say so," Sam said. She could hear him smirking.

Before she could even think of a response, Derek barged into her room, knocking on her door from the inside.

"Later," she said, hanging up the phone quickly.

"Here to insult me some more?" Casey said, pretending to be way more hurt than she was. From the look on his face, he almost believed her. For a second.

"Maybe tomorrow," he said.

"Then what do you want?" she asked.

He rolled his eyes, put his hands in his pockets, then took them out again. He played with the hem on his t-shirt.

"So I was talking to Sam just now," he began, not making eye contact. Probably, Casey thought, so that she had no way to interrupt him. "I'm guessing you were too, right?" He looked up.

"No," Casey lied, indignantly.

"I'll take that as a yes," Derek said.

She narrowed her eyes at him. She hated when people insinuated that she was so easy to read.

"And he said that you guys weren't together," Derek said.

"Oh, so you believe him, but not me?"

"I asked you," Derek said. "You didn't say no. You just threw me out of the room."

Dammit, she thought. He wasn't supposed to remember that. "I was offended," she said.

"Yeah," Derek said. "So, um."

"What?"

"I guess I," he began. "Maybe..."

He never beat around the bush this much. Never. Casey wondered if she should just let him off the hook. His hands went back into his pockets.

Casey guessed it was up to her. "You don't have to say it," she signed. He looked even guiltier when she signed. She hadn't been trying to guilt him further. And he really needed to take his hands out of his pockets because that made her feel guilty, and she hadn't even done anything.

"Yeah, I do," he said. "I'm s-sorry that I said you were trouble."

"Okay," Casey said. Stop looking at me like that, she thought. There had to be a way to wipe that embarrassed look off his face. It took a second for inspiration to hit.

"Hug?" she asked, holding her arms out and stepping toward him. He stepped back in horror.

"Didn't think so," Casey said, smiling a little. That was the Derek she knew. "So why are you still in my room?"

"No idea," he signed. He didn't seem to be in a hurry to leave, though.

"By the way," Casey said, sitting down again. "Did Sam act like he knew exactly what you were going to do?"

"Maybe," Derek said. "You too?"

"Yes," Casey said. "How much do you hate that?"

Derek looked at her conspiratorially. For a second, it looked like he was going to beckon her closer and huddle or something. She didn't know how to feel about that. "Who can we get to beat him up?" Derek signed.

"I'll think about it," Casey signed. "And get back to you."

"Lizzie," Derek signed. He used her name sign, which translated to something like"Sporty L." It used to be "Sporty Spice" but Lizzie hinted to Derek that she might know how to kill a man with her bare hands. Casey, as far as she knew, still didn't have a name sign.

"No," Casey signed. "She'd beat you up first."

"True," Derek signed. "So you're getting good at this."

Casey shook her head and cursed the rush of blood to her face.

"Now I can't talk about you in front of your face," Derek signed. She threw a pillow at him, then a particularly evil thought entered her mind and she smiled.

"What?" Derek asked.

"I can still talk about you in front of your face," Casey said.

"You'll never be as good as Edwin is at it," Derek said, grinning back at her.

"He'll teach me. I'll pay him," she signed. She couldn't remember the sign for "if" but she thought she did okay.

"You can't afford it," he signed.

"You did go through my wallet!" she said. Her hand groped the bed behind her for something else to chuck at him, but found nothing. He took it as his cue to duck out of her room. Luckily for him he was faster than she was; his door slammed shut before she even got to her doorway.

She wondered if he knew that she never kept more than twenty dollars in her wallet at one time and that her real cash was hidden in a couple of CD cases.

Wouldn't put it past him, she thought. That worried her, but she made herself go through all the usual stuff she did to get ready for bed before she checked. Like somehow that made her a little less compulsive. And anyway, he was more of a mooch than a thief. So, as expected, it was all there. She moved a little of it elsewhere, just in case.

Part Three: Derek.

Casey had a name sign. Derek just didn't use it around her, so she didn't know about it. It was based on the sign for "princess;" he just modified the "p" handshape into a "c" for Casey. He mostly used it when he was mad at her, so even Sam knew not to let the cat out of the bag. Derek knew that he had to come up with a name sign that wouldn't get him clobbered, but it was a lot harder than it seemed.

He knew that she wanted one. It had gotten to the point where he barely used any name signs around her. She felt left out and it was obvious. The longer he waited the worse it got.

But he hated the ceremony that seemed to come with bestowing the name sign. You couldn't make up your own, first of all; it had to be given to you specifically by a member of the Deaf community. As far as Casey was concerned, he was the Deaf community, so it fell to him.

Edwin would have been better at it. He'd pay the kid to come up with something if he had any money. And if he could find a way to ask him without it seeming like he cared or anything.

Tuesday, over lunch, Sam played dumb when Derek asked for his help.

"Name sign? I thought she had one," Sam signed.

Derek narrowed his eyes. "Not helping," he signed.

"No, I'm not," Sam signed. "And I'm not going to. This is your thing."

"But you'd do a better job," Derek signed. "You know her better. You like her more. And you're the smart one."

"And you're the one with the talent for bullshit," Sam signed.

"That does me no good now," Derek signed.

"Yeah," Sam signed. "You need to be honest. How will you survive?"

"I have no idea," Derek signed, moving his tray aside and bonking his head on the table. If he gave himself a concussion, none of this would matter.