Eleanor
Sitting at my vanity waiting for my ladies in waiting to come in and finish my hair and makeup. Breathe Leni just breathe everything will be okay grabbing my bag I pulled out the green cardigan. I had stolen from Lexi's room. Holding it to my face I breathed in her scent maybe it was a little odd but than again my whole life has been a little strange.
Lilacs I never liked them much but now they took on a whole new meaning. Leaning back I stared at myself in the mirror what had she seen in me? Why had she chosen me? I wasn't anyone special my hair was dry a bland light brown my eyes an icy blue I wasn't beautiful. I wasn't tall or short I wasn't rail thin but I wasn't fat. I was just average to most people I was a spoiled brat someone to be handled babysat to others I was invisible.
I wasn't sure what Lexi saw in me I mean did she take her job with the faire so seriously that she thought I was some kind of queen to be worshiped? I didn't want that I just wanted to be treated normally. "Princess Eleanor your royal highness"
Snapping my head up I swallowed quickly putting the sweater back in my bag why was I so nervous? All day I had been jittery not even bothering to attend martial arts today, I was so confused I didn't know what to say to her how to deal with any of this. "Yes Sabrina?" My Mistress of the Robes Sabrina Lynn Rose came in curtsying to me she was followed by my Ladies of the Bedchamber Vanessa Misgovern, Lucy Britta, Mia Riley.
"Princess Eleanor our queen has asked us to help you get ready" "Good luck you'll need it I'm pretty hideous" "Oh dear Eleanor you are anything but ugly you my dear are a beautiful talented passionate young lady and someday you shall see it"
Sabrina combed out my hair as she looked at me our eyes connecting through my mirror she's been my lady in waiting since I was born she's seen me through everything good, bad. I wish I could tell her this I wish I could tell anybody all my feelings. "Princess this day is just the start of what will surely be a divine life fourteen why I remember when you were born just a tiny screaming but strong willed infant. I can remember the joy on your mum and dad's faces when thee doctors handed you to them" "Yeah I'm sure they were excited about Liam he was the wanted child the spare to the heir"
"No Mama it wasn't just him"
Sabrina slide off my robe as Vanessa helped me stand up Lucy handed me my undergarments. Placing her hands on my shoulders she stared me straight in my eyes. "You might not of been planned for Eleanor but their love for you is no less pure than theirs for your brothers" "Now Princess we need to get thee dressed"
Mia helped me slip into my black diamond corset and my matching mini skirt both were designed exclusively for me for this day over the course of the last five months. I heard mum say it cost 6 million to make but it was so worth it. Even I thought I looked pretty sharp Sabrina had piled my hair into a French twist with only a few curls hanging down. "Ladies"
I snapped my head up as my mum came inside. "Sweetheart you look stunning" smiling slightly I saw Sabrina and the other ladies bow to mum than Sabrina exchanged a look with me gently kissing my head.
"Ladies excellent job"
Coming over mum laid a hand down on my shoulder standing side by side to her I sighed she was just so gorgeous her mid length green and white Chanel dress hugged her chest waist and hips in all the right ways. I could only image it cost around 9 million. Just as I had started to feel some what pretty I take a look at her and feel small worthless and ugly again she didn't even try yet she was radiant. When would I ever develop?
"Mum were you always beautiful?" "Eleanor" She looked at me shaking her head. "Haven't I always told you that beauty is skin deep?" "Yes mum but it doesn't help I'm not beautiful either way" She didn't correct me simply sighing bending down to me "Eleanor everyone has their flaws no one is perfect I had my struggles as a kid I didn't always feel beautiful growing up on a farm doesn't exactly make one feel sexy. I had to learn how to embrace my flaws turn them into something beautiful something to be proud of"
She didn't get it she never did how could she? She is beautiful she doesn't need million dollar dresses expensive makeup her skin is never blotchy her teeth are straight gleaming white she doesn't weigh over 100 lbs her eyebrows are perfectly arched. She could eat whatever she wanted and never gain an ounce. Beauty is from the inside that's what she said right. Maybe that's why I was never able to look beautiful on the outside. If people knew what was on my inside they would wish that beheading was still legal.
I would be hung this blackness that has a hold on me is tainting me."Are you ready my dear? Everyone is here" Swallowing I willed myself to get through this night. My voice betrayed me coming out small weak "Sure" She either didn't notice or didn't care cause she just fixed any last minute blemishes, wrinkles on me taking my hand leading me out of my room.