AND DREAM AWAY

Chapter 25

In the end, I almost missed her. Almost wished I had. When I came in the door, she was standing there hugging the bastard in front of the platform. Just like the dream. I stared, frozen in disbelief, unable to leave. Watched him hand her the ring, watched her take it. Just like the dream. Watched as they walked to the controls and she slid the ring into the slot and the teleport hummed to life.

Go! Me brain screamed, turn around and go! But I just stood there and watched. Finally me legs worked and I turned.

"Hatter!"

"Alice!" Showtime. "Hey!" They're just words. I can do this. Pasted on a grin and turned to run and meet her halfway.

"I was…um…I was afraid I might've missed you."

"Yeah, you cut it a little close," Alice smiled looking confused.

"Yeah. I was…um. Guess I was trying not to think about it. Anyways, I wanted to say…goodbye."

"Goodbye?" she repeated. There was shock in her eyes, disbelief and maybe pain. Couldn't do this.

"And if you…you know…ever fancy coming back…"

"You want me to stay?" she tilted her head at me, frowning slightly.

I love you. I'd said it a thousand times, and now when it mattered, when I meant it, the words wouldn't come. Couldn't come.

"Hell no!" me voice squeaked. Saw Jack watching, listening. "No, I think you should go home."

She stared at me in confusion, denial and finally acceptance.

"Yeah. Yeah, I've had enough of Wonderland for a lifetime."

"Yes. I am sure you have. Right?" Forced a laugh.

"Still," I smiled. "We had…had a laugh. You know? Had some good times. Obviously…amid all the bad times." Thoughts were twisted up, words not coming out right. It was hard to lie. Another broken promise.

"Yeah. Yeah, we did." Her eyes weren't stormy anymore. Now they were just sad.

We stared at each other. Me wanting to tell her the truth and Alice? There was something in her eyes. Loss, sadness and acceptance. No excitement about going home.

"Oh. Um…yeah. Right." She looked down and hesitated, then took off the coat and held it out. Took off the purple coat and handed it back to me. No, no. I wanted to scream. Keep it. Please Alice.

"Brilliant. Thank you! That's good." Shook the coat and folded it over me arm. Couldn't take much more of this. I love you Alice.

"So, we should…" Held me arms out and gave her a very uncomfortable hug. The bastard was still watching us. Wanted to kiss her. Wanted to….

"You know, you could always visit my world," she wouldn't let it go. Wouldn't let me go. "You might like it."

You won't remember me. They're going to erase your memory. I won't even be a figment in a dream. Bloody hell. Can't do this! Blinked and took a deep breath.

"Yeah. We could…we could do pizza." Pizza? Really, that's what you want to do with Alice?

"And lots of other things," she answered softly. Lots o' other things. There's lots o' other things I want to do with you Alice. A lifetime full.

Suddenly the tech was there pulling her away, up onto the platform.

"Really? I was just…" I love you Alice. Please don't forget me. She looked back.

"Just force yourself to breathe," the tech told her before pushing her thru the teleport beam. And she was gone. Alice was gone.

AN: I figure Hatter had more reason to let her go than just cause he couldn't say the words. Words are his life, his tools. They get him what he wants. Sorry, no happiness here, unless it's Jack that's satisfied Hatter isn't getting Alice.