Fin awoke to feel a pressure on his shoulder, his ears also aware of music. He blinked, the TV still replayed the menu option music for the Lion King as Olivia's body leaned against his. He looked at the clock on the microwave behind them.

1:56

He chuckled, where did the time go?

He leaned forward slowly, her body following his, refusing to let go.

"Liv."

He spoke softly.

"Olivia. Come on; my neck is going to be in rough shape tomorrow if I sleep all night like this."

Her mumbled response made him smile.

"But I'm comfortable."

She didn't move, didn't open her eyes, just spoke in her dry, crackly middle-of-the-night voice.

"You'll be more comfortable in your bed. Come on."

He stood up as she sat up off his shoulder. He led her to her bed and pulled the covers back.

"Thanks for staying, Fin." She said in that same voice as she sat down.

"Anytime, Liv. Goodnight."

He left her room for the couch. He put his head back on the pillow after turning the TV off, a smile still pasted on his face. Olivia felt herself falling into the clutches of another memory.

:::

She opened her eyes to see a streak of the moon's light reaching for her across the marble floor. Her left eye was almost unable to open in the darkness. Her entire body was pulsing, throbbing as the blood passed through her extremities, her body desperately trying to repair the gashes in her skin. She could do nothing but lie there in great pain, filling her lungs until her chest pressed against the cool floor, and emptying them until her ribs retreated away from it.

Her cheek was pressed against the floor, a small pool of blood cushioning it. Her palms made contact with the floor as she was still, motionless. Her torso, twisted in an odd position, was fighting against her legs which were loosely bent below her. She listened to the wind tickle the curtains, wrapping them in a light breath of wet air. She thought she was going to die if she hadn't already died. She wished she would die. She'd had enough.

:::

Olivia opened her eyes slowly, finding herself in her room on her back in her bed. Safe. It was not as terrifying as others had been, but it still invaded her mind as if it wished to destroy her. She'd have to fight it, she knew that. And fight she would. She glanced out into the living room, just to reassure herself. There was Fin. He was lying on his side, his left arm beneath the pillow at his head as his mouth hung open and soft snores came out. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes again.

Monday

"I can use it to help gain other victims' trust. I have a connection on a new level to all of them."

Olivia spoke to her therapist, Julie, again.

"I agree." She answered.

Olivia paused. She was still not ready to tell the therapist about the details of her attacks, but she was ready to talk a little about the aftermath.

"I have nightmares. It started with flashbacks in the middle of the day. I could be anywhere and then go back to that place again without being able to stop it." She said softly.

Julie nodded slowly.

"Have the flashbacks gotten better at all?"

"I don't have them in the middle of the day anymore, but I do go back every night." Liv replied.

"They will go away with time, but it's just something that has to improve slowly. And it will improve."

Another bout of silence. Olivia refused to speak as she experienced a loss of words.

"You're a strong woman, Olivia. You're going to get through this."

She nodded. "I know."

She looked down at her hands and voiced her thoughts.

"I just don't know what shape I'll be in when I get to the other side of it."

"If you keep doing what you're doing, you'll be just fine. I promise."

Sean welcomed the detectives at 8:00 the next morning, already hard at work with the files and information they already had.

"Morning." He said, not even looking up.

Elliot looked back at Fin and Munch, already seated at their desks. They both shrugged.

"I've got something."

The three men approached the newer member of their team at the media center.

"This guy has no known occupation or residence, right?"

Sean spoke so fast they could barely process his words.

"We don't even know who he is. What'd you get?" Fin asked.

"I've got rapes that have the exact same MO across the country. They follow a route commonly taken by cross-country -"

"Truckers." Elliot finished quietly, impressed by the work of Sean.

"Exactly. I'm working on a place of residence. Maybe we can get a hit on a credit card or something used more in one city than any others."

"Slow down, Sherlock. We need to ID him first." Elliot said.

Munch laid a hand on Sean's shoulder.

"How long have you been here?"

Sean grinned, "Five or so. I need to step up my game for you guys."

"Go get yourself some coffee; you look like you need it. We'll pick it up from here and fill you in when you get back."

Munch nodded at Sean, who did not argue.

"Thanks."

Elliot sat down where Sean had been.

"He's good." Elliot admitted.

"He's still not Olivia." Fin replied.

"I don't think he ever will be, physically."

Munch had to throw in a smart comment. Fin shook his head, still amused by the dry jokes his partner made.

Olivia left the office and got herself a cup of coffee before walking toward the precinct. The fresh air was a scent she welcomed, and now that her body was feeling somewhat better, she felt she could use some mind-freeing exercise. After three blocks of walking, sunshine, and people, Olivia felt more comfortable in her city was still her home. They hadn't taken that away.

The horns still made her heart leap, but she wasn't affected like she had been when she'd first returned. She felt proud of how far she'd already come. She let herself smile in the warm morning sunshine reflecting off of buildings. It was a beautiful day to be alive. She walked into the main entrance of the precinct, showing her badge to the desk sergeant on the first floor.

"Welcome home, Detective Benson."

The man smiled at her as she lifted her sunglasses off her face.

She smiled, "Thanks, Tom. It's good to see you again."

"You too. Still know the way up to the squad room?" He teased.

She chuckled, "We'll see."

The elevator took her up to her floor, and she felt comfortable and safe walking down the familiar hallway into the squad room. She found her best friends standing around the media center after looking around. She approached them easily, not feeling hesitation or embarrassment - finally. Fin turned around first.

"Hey, look who showed up. Mornin' Liv."

He smiled and she returned with a smile of her own.

"You're late." Munch smiled as well.

"As always. Wouldn't want to disappoint you guys." She replied.

"Just the three of you today?"

Elliot shook his head, "We sent our new friend for coffee. Hope he knows he was supposed to get us some too."

She set her coffee down.

"I see. Well, I just need to talk to Cragen. Heard you caught a tough case." She said.

watching them made her miss working more than she had realized. She wanted to come back.

They nodded, "We don't even know this guy's real name."

She looked intently at the screen, "He has a certain MO?"

"He knocks them out and kills them before he rapes them - most in alleyways at night - and after he's done, he takes their jewelry - and fingers - and makes a break for it." Elliot replied.

Liv shook her head. "That's sick."

"They all are, baby." Fin nodded.

She sighed, picking up her cup again.

"Well don't let me interrupt. Good luck."

They watched her knock on the captain's door and disappear inside.

"You think he'll ask her about tonight?" Fin questioned.

Cragen heard her knock as he was filing case-files. The door opened before he could answer. She surprised him.

"Olivia."

His tone showed his surprise. She closed the door behind her, leaning on the table in his room.

"I wanted to talk to you." She said quietly.

He came around the front of his desk, leaning back on the oak of his desk opposite from her.

"I'm all ears." He answered honestly.

"I'm going to take this week off."

He raised his eyebrows.

"And next week." He finished for her.

She rolled her eyes with a small grin, "We'll see."

She paused, looking down before meeting his eyes again.

"Have you heard anything about the case?" She spoke softly.

He nodded. "I just got off the phone with the chief of the FBI's drug task force. They said they have the men on thousands of counts of possession and distribution. FBI recovered four million dollars in cash at the home in Mexico City. The men will be charged with drug trafficking and kidnapping. They've teamed up with the human trafficking task force as well to prosecute this case. They're going away for life - no parole. Evidence is solid. Jury won't see any witnesses."

"What about rape? All those women were tortured." She said forcefully.

Cragen nodded his head, "Most of the women who the men kidnapped have given statements to be read in front of the jury. They'll go away for rape too."

"And what about me?" She asked, a lump choking her again.

Her captain sighed.

"No one is going to force you to make a statement, Liv. They won't need you to put the men away for centuries."

Olivia let out the breath she'd been holding, for how long she didn't know. She knew, though, that she had to get justice for herself. She planned to give a statement. Every other victim she'd worked with had had the courage to go to trail and tell their stories.

"We'll see what happens."

He paused.

"Listen, if you're up to it, the guys were talking about going out tonight. They really want you to come." Cragen said cautiously.

She smirked, "Are you one of those guys? Because if you aren't, I'm not going."

He chuckled, "I'll go if you do."

"Deal." She got up to leave.

"Liv, are you talking to anybody?"

Cragen didn't want to press, but he wanted his detective to be alright.

She turned, "Yeah. I'm going regularly to Julie Milton. Maybe she'll clear me for duty soon."

He chuckled. "Maybe. Good for you, Liv."

He was proud of her for seeking help alone. She turned to leave again, but found herself facing him once more.

"What are we supposed to wear for this night out?"

He hesitated, "They told me to break out my good suit. I guess we're dressing up." He shrugged.

"Alright."

"We'll be picking you up at 7:00."

She smiled. "I will watch for you. Thanks, Captain."

She opened the door and left the room with a wave to her colleagues.