A/N: Thank you to everyone who has been reading and reviewing. When I see your comments, it makes me smile. I write for those who read just as much as I do for myself. Please continue to share your valued opinions.
Chapter Twenty – Five
Joey laid in wait for Eddie to pull out of the driveway on her way for her treatment. As soon as he saw her leave, he headed inside. "You ready Dad?" he asked. Jamie was dressed and in his wheelchair.
"You bet, I thought, if you want to, we can grab some lunch. My treat for helping me out." Jamie was still so nervous around his son.
"Let's see if you aren't going in the hospital," Joey told him as he got Jamie to the car. He ran back inside to tell Frank they were leaving, "Grandpa, I'm taking Dad to look at new sneakers so Mom doesn't have to do it."
Frank nodded as he read his newspaper. He knew something more was going on with his son, but he chose to pick his battles.
Joey got Jamie to his appointment right on time the doctor called him back within five minutes. Jamie made this appointment with Dr. O'Donnell, his regular physician. The neurologist could do little for a bedsore.
"How are you feeling, Jamie?" Matthew O'Donnell asked him.
"Better, I'm getting stronger but…I have this sore on my left leg now and when I go to the bathroom, it burns and my stomach hurts," Jamie explained embarrassed to admit all of this in front of his son.
"Sounds like you have a pressure sore, I'll take a look. Do you think you can do a urine sample as well? You might have a UTI from holding in urine. It is very common with stroke patients."
It took a few minutes for the doctor to complete his exam and to get the dipstick back. "Just as I suspected, UTI and a pressure sore. It's not very bad actually, but you do have to keep it very clean."
He nodded, "I'll get it done," Jamie assured him.
"You'll need help, you can't keep it clean enough on your own. Also, I'd like you to not use the diapers for a few days until the infection clears up…why are you shaking your head?"
"Eddie's just been to the surgeon for lymphedema, I can't walk. I need help to get into my chair."
"Dad, I can start staying at the house," Joey offered.
"No, that will upset your Mom. She'll think that I am getting worse. We'll think of something. I'll have to talk to your mom. We'll work it out as a team."
Jamie left with his prescriptions and some sample creams for the ulcer. "Okay so where do you want to go? That diner by the drugstore? They have the best banana cream pie."
Jamie nodded, glad to be spending one on one time with his son.
Joey pulled up to the diner and got Jamie inside. The ordered soups, sandwiches, and the famous banana cream pie. "We'll tell Mom the truth when we get home. She will be angry but it was good we got you here to the doctor. You are sick, Dad. You have to get better."
Jamie nodded, "Your sister set a date. September so I have less than a year to get walking. I heard this song on the radio the other day, and I want to hold your mother in my arms and dance with her to it. That seems like a pipe dream. I'm sorry…" Jamie saw Joey wasn't paying attention. "So Mom's pregnant…"
That got Joey's attention, "What?"
Jamie laughed, "I got your attention, did I?"
"Sorry, Dad, I uh.." Joey turned his head again as the soup came and kept looking at the sidewalk pizza place across the street. Jamie turned to see what he was looking at.
Then he saw her, the pretty dark haired girl that Joey had to the house every so often, the girl his money had gone to help. "Your partner? She's dating?"
Joey shrugged, "I guess so, but she never said anything to me about it. Thought she told me everything."
"Joey, listen to me," Jamie began. "No one understand more than I do that when you ride with someone day in and day out for a while…anyone, male or female, you make a bond. You share things with each other that…you don't share with anyone else. One of my old Sergeants used to say "There are two people I trust in this world, my partner and my wife…and I'm not so sure about my wife." So when I met your mother and we found out that we were meant to be partners in many ways well…it was a gift."
"Dad…" Joey broke in. Jamie held up his hand.
"Hear me out, Joe," Jamie replied. "If you have feelings for your partner, you need to tell her. You need to tell her now before you risk ruining you friendship and your partnership. I don't want to see you get hurt Joey."
Joey nodded, "It really doesn't matter anyway if she's with a guy. And it's not like that. She's pretty, we are best friends…I guess that's what is bothering me. We are best friends and I don't know she has a boyfriend. Something is weird about that."
Jamie sighed, "You mom and I were best friends too. About six months into our partnership, she doesn't show up for work. I check with Renzulli and he says she banged in sick. She's alone in the city, so naturally I go to check on her, but she won't answer the door or my phone calls. Finally, I sneak in and when she opens the door, she is beaten, face black and blue, eyes blood shot, someone did a number on her. It took me three days to get her to admit it and another three to get her to agree to press charges. After that she really started to trust me. We made a strong bond, but dating, that was still a really touchy subject."
Jamie worked on his soup as he let Joey absorb what he said. When sandwiches came Joey turned his attention to his father. "When did you know, with Mom?" Joey asked. "That it was time to change it up. Get out of the RMP and into the happily ever after?"
Jamie sighed, "Your grandpa, Peter. He was attacked in his cell, got hurt pretty badly and your Mom understandably was upset. I'd been crashing at her place on and off for a few weeks before that, she had a shoot and struggled a lot with recovering from the trauma. Mom was not made to be a cop. Do not ever tell her I said that. She had the instincts and the guts but was far too idealistic and set herself up to get let down over and over again "
Jamie took a bite of his sandwich. "So the night he was attacked I stayed with her in case he took a turn. I was out on the couch, sound asleep, and I heard her crying. Your mom isn't a crier, she has to be under some intense strain to cry, so I get up and find her in the bathroom; she has the water running to muffle the sound. It about broke my heart seeing her like that and I knew that moment that I could not let it go on any longer. I had to take her in my arms and just love the pain away."
"So just like that?" Joey asked. "You two changed just like that?"
"Well, that night while she cried in my arms, I told her that no matter what I'd always be there for her. I have to keep that promise, Joey. I have never let her down that way since that night. I told her I loved her and I would always love her." Jamie sipped his coffee. "So if you feel that way about your partner, you need to tell her, you need to see if she feels that way too, then you see your Sergeant and ask for new partners. If she gives you a rough time of it, let me know. I can still pull a string or two from the house." Jamie winked at him.
Joey nodded, "I'm pretty sure she doesn't feel the same way but I'm going to confront her on this guy. I think as her best friend she should have told me. But thanks, Dad, for the advice. If you aren't going to eat that pie, pass it."
Jamie took a huge forkful of pie then pushed the plate to Joey. He was starting to feel tired, "Joe, we really need to go home soon. I'm going to need to use the bathroom."
"You think you'll be good until we get home, Dad?" Joey asked Jamie. "They have a handicap bathroom back there, I can take you so you don't have to worry about it on the drive home. You know the traffic this time of day."
Jamie turned red as a beet thinking that he'd have to rely on his son to take him to the toilet. It was bad enough having to rely on his wife to do that or to help him change a diaper before he got more dexterity and started doing it for himself. "If you just help me in there, I can do it myself." Joey pushed the chair and had an idea. "I'm going to put your chair right behind you. I can turn around and hold your left arm. We can do this no problem, nice and neat."
Jamie was impressed and Joey's idea worked. Soon they were in the car on their way home. "What are we going to tell Grandpa?" Joey asked. "I said we were getting you sneakers."
Jamie thought a minute as Joey turned onto their street, "I wouldn't worry about to tell Grandpa, Joe. Mom's home."
Both men decided that unless pressed they would wait and Jamie would explain to Eddie while Joey was to the pharmacy go get Jamie's prescriptions. Joey helped unload Jamie from the car, again happy to see Jamie helping him mostly through using his arm. As soon as they stepped inside, Eddie, who had been pacing the floor worrying where they got to, turned around. "I don't see a bag." She moved and looked at Jamie's feet. "And those are your old sneakers. Where have you two been?" She crossed her arms over her chest and held her husband's eyes.
"Eddie, don't get upset,' Jamie said keeping his voice gentle. He knew she was angry. "Joey took me to see Dr. O'Donnell then we had some lunch and talked. Everything is fine. Joey didn't want to worry Dad so he said we were going to shop for sneakers. And we were before I got tired and asked him to bring me home."
"Why did you go see the doctor, Jamie? What aren't you telling me?" She looked at Joey now. "And you, you ought to know better than to keep things from me about Dad's health. I have to know everything Joseph so I can make sure I am doing the best I can for him."
"Mom, this was kind of a private thing," Joey defended. "Dad, asked for my help. He's worrying about you and he knew if he mentioned he wasn't feeling well you'd skip your massage."
"That should have been my decision, Jamie, with you, yes but not yours alone!" Eddie snapped. "Now tell me what made you go behind my back like this. What made you decide to go to see Matt?"
Jamie looked down at his lap, "I have the right, Eddie, to choose to see my doctor on my own. I have the right to decide if I want to burden you with it. You say you need to know all things about my health so you can care for me, well I have the right to decide for myself if I think something can wait. I have the right and the duty as your husband to look out for your health too. That was what I did and Joey helped. This isn't on him, it's on me. As a matter of fact, Joe, go pick up those scripts and the toilet thing we talked about while I work this out with your mother. You did as I asked, there's no wrong in it."
Jamie knew how much Joey hated to disappoint his mother. If Jamie got upset with Joey he handled it better than when Eddie did. Joey was touched by his father's defense of him and he quickly headed out to get the medications and items Jamie would require.
"Jamie, I know you feel like less of a partner lately..." Eddie began.
"I'm sick of it, too, Eddie. I am so sick of being coddled and shielded from everything. I'm sick of you, Joey, Erin...making my decisions. You want to know why I went. I have a pressure sore on my leg. It hurts like hell and it's infected. The doctor gave me some creams to put on it and I can't sleep on my back. I also can't sit in my chair too often, I have to be on the sofa or in bed. I know that's going to make more work on you and I'm sorry."
Eddie felt awful, a pressure sore meant she hadn't helped him in some way.
"Now, don't go feeling guilty for this. The doctor said it is very common in stroke patients and apparently so are UTIs. I also have one of those, probably from the diapers. Joey is getting a bedside toilet. I can take a step or two now if you hold onto me and use that during the night. I should have agreed to it before but...my Irish pride."
Eddie had tears in her eyes, Jamie was sick. Not horribly so but sick just the same. "So you'll be okay? All in all he says you'll be okay?"
"Yeah, I'm going to be fine, sweetie. I am. I have to take some pills and rest my leg until the sore heals but you...You could lose your arm if the blockage gets much worse. I can't stand by, baby myself, and let that happen. Our marriage is in trouble Eddie, not because I don't' love you, not because of anything like that. I love you more than anything else in the world, but the dynamic is so out of bound...it's so parent child now I don't if we can survive. I really don't. I try to show you and you...tell me soon. When is that?"
"Jamie...there's no way...I want it too. I do act like your mother and I'm sorry...I will try to include you more and I will take better care of myself, but please do not say we are in trouble, I can't handle that."
Jamie knew he chose the wrong words but he had to make her see how it felt for him to be spoken around and not permitted to conduct his own life. "I can't either. Come here sweetheart. I'm sorry I said it like that, I really am." Eddie crossed the room and Jamie in spite of the pain from the sore and being tired pulled her with his surprisingly strong good arm onto his lap. "I love you...Let's please go back to being partners okay? Please." He kissed the side of her head.
Eddie met his eyes and nodded, "Partners. In sickness and in health, from now on, partners."