Author's Note: I want mocha. Can somebody get me that? It would be much appreciated.
I'm done being awkward now. Here's Chapter Twenty-Four.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Spencer looked through the peephole once more, waiting anxiously for Toby to show up. Jason had gone to Aria's half an hour ago, and it was just Spencer now, waiting for Toby.
The sound of a dripping faucet reminded Spencer of how long five minutes could feel when you were waiting. She groaned as she looked at her watch.
Finally, there was a knock on the door. Spencer answered it, spotting Toby. Before he even got the chance to react, she had yanked him in the apartment, closing, chaining, and deadbolting the door behind him, preventing a hasty exit.
"My guess is Jason wasn't the one who wanted to talk," Toby said.
Spencer shook her head. "Jason and I made a deal that I could use his apartment and text you with his phone. I need to talk to you, Toby," she said.
He sighed, feeling uncomfortable, something Spencer picked up on.
"What?" she asked, growing impatient. "Look, Toby. Hanna clued me into why you're avoiding me," she informed him.
"Why?" Toby questioned, intrigued to hear her answer.
"Because of Wren. And I wanted you to know that I'm not mad if you're upset about it. It doesn't mean that I think your reason for being upset is justified, but I'm not mad," she said. She stared down at her feet, praying a blush wouldn't rise to her cheeks. "I actually think it's…cute that you're so concerned," she confessed quietly.
Toby avoided looking at Spencer. He wasn't entirely certain why, but he felt betrayed.
"I just wanted to let you know that Wren didn't mean anything to me. It was a one-night stand. I don't even have his phone number. I guess…I was just using him to get over Andrew. He was the first guy I was with at all since I broke up with Andrew," she said.
Toby nodded noncommittally. "It doesn't really make a difference to me," he mumbled.
I was sort of hoping that it did. "Oh," Spencer uttered softly. "Right."
"You don't have to explain yourself to me, Spencer. I'm not your keeper," he said quietly, as if he didn't want to say it at all. The whole thing felt really forced, on both ends.
Spencer looked at him, and he was avoiding her gaze at all costs. "I just wanted you to know…" she said, trailing off, all while praying that he wouldn't question why.
"Why?"
Damn.
"Why?" Spencer questioned, thinking it over herself. "I…I…"
She thought, trying to figure out what to say. Should she tell the truth and just get out with it? Should she embellish the truth, telling him that it was a mistake and she deeply regretted it? Should she tell a complete lie and just avoid the question altogether, changing the subject?
Or should she tell the whole truth? The one where she didn't hold back; the one where she hadn't stopped thinking about the kiss for months; the one where she had dreams and fantasies, all with him; the one where she hadn't wasted time neglecting him, and appreciated him before it was all too late.
She shrugged. "I just wanted to tell you the truth. Hanna seemed to think that it was bothering you," she answered dismissively.
"I don't know. I can't explain it. I guess I was…concerned?" he lied. Well, it was half a lie. Or half of telling the truth; he wasn't sure. He was concerned, but he also had more selfish reasons. Reasons he now was unsure whether he wanted to own up to.
Spencer looked completely resigned at the moment. "Well…thanks, I guess, for your concern," she murmured. There was an elephant in the room, both unsure whether the other realized it. Where was Hanna when you needed her?
"I think I should go," Toby said finally. "If that was all you wanted to talk about, I think I should go," he said.
She nodded. "You're right. Sorry if I made you feel awkward," she said, though her sentence sounded more obligatory than apologetic.
Spencer closed the door behind Toby and both leaned on either side of the door. They were both silently cursing themselves for not saying what they needed to; things that would change everything; things which would make it all better, for everyone, especially one another.
Emily pushed hard on the door to Toby's apartment to get in. It was more of a struggle than usual. When she opened the door, she saw why. There was a stack of boxes near the door. They were the kind that people used when they moved out.
This could not be good.
"Toby!" she exclaimed, suddenly growing very nervous. "Toby? Where are you?!" she shouted nervously.
She walked to Toby's room and saw him packing a bag. "What are you doing?" she asked, nervous to hear an answer.
"I'm going out of town for a few days," he answered with a sigh.
"And those boxes out there?" she inquired.
He shrugged. "Some essential boxes in case I decide I want to leave Rosewood for good," he said.
Emily's eyes became wide. "Toby, are you crazy? All because of Spencer?" she inquired with shock.
"Spencer has nothing to do with this."
Lie, lie, lie.
"She doesn't, Emily! I got a job offer out of town. I was asked to look at the land and see if it's something I want to consider. I have nothing solid in this town, and there, I might actually have more luck when it comes to getting work. It's a bigger city that's growing. Rosewood is crumbling," he retorted. He stared at her. "Why do you think everything has to do with Spencer?"
She scoffed. "It so obviously does, Toby. You're in love. It's not your fault. Love makes you do stupid things," she reminded him.
He shrugged. "I would agree…if I were in love. How could I let myself fall in love with someone who doesn't and wouldn't love me back?" he asked, his voice growing soft.
Her voice became light as a feather. "Because love makes us all do stupid things," she repeated.
"I'm going, Emily. I'll be back in a week or so. And then…I don't know. But I'm considering it," he said, referencing this potential move.
Emily looked at him sadly. "Just please…think with your head before you make a solid decision," she pleaded sweetly.
Toby looked at her, feeling a little saddened by her very manifestation. He nodded slowly, listening to her.
Spencer and Hanna were sitting in a diner, waiting for Emily. Spencer was examining the menu while Hanna stared at her. Spencer hadn't really spoken anything except for the traditional pleasantries, but rather began scrutinizing the menu. Hanna had been dying to ask how her confrontation with Toby went, but she decided it would probably be better to wait until Emily was there to act as a buffer.
Hanna was growing rather antsy. She decided to finally just ask her.
"So, Spence…how did it go?" she asked finally.
"The whole meeting thing with Toby?" Spencer inquired, not averting her eyes from the menu.
Hanna nodded, adding, "Yes." She paused. "Did you tell him everything?" she questioned.
"I told him that the night with Wren meant nothing, and the whole thing was just me trying to get over Wren," Spencer answered.
Hanna nodded, pursing her lips. "So you didn't tell him everything. You didn't mention that you love him."
Spencer opened her mouth to speak, but Emily walked up to them at that very moment. Both girls took notice of her somber, distressed expression as she slid down in the booth next to Hanna.
"Hey, Emily," Spencer said, the concern rising in her voice.
Hanna was a little more blatant about it. "Hey, what's wrong?" she asked immediately.
Emily sighed. "I don't know if I should say this…I don't want to upset you," she said, her brown eyes boring into Spencer.
Spencer became antsy as she felt her heartbeat quicken. "What is it, Emily?" she inquired apprehensively.
"It's Toby. He's left town. And I'm scared that he might not come back. He's really serious about leaving," Emily explained, not making eye contact with either of the girls, instead staring at the table.
Hanna looked to see Spencer's reaction. Her eyes were filled with concern, but she remained silent.
Finally, she spoke. "What?" she asked quietly, in a voice so childlike and innocent, it might've broken Hanna's heart.
"He's gone. He left this afternoon. I'm worried about him. There's something wrong…" Emily said, but Spencer tuned it out completely.
She only began to think of the things she said wrong; the missed opportunities she had to tell him how she really felt; the little things about him she would quickly miss; everything about him, really.
Spencer walked into her apartment. Since Wren stayed, she had unpacked everything, and it was finally starting to feel comfortable.
But now, things just felt different. Everything felt different. Spencer had started putting everything in perspective. Toby just made her think about herself in a different way. He opened her eyes to things that never even crossed her mind before, and she liked that. Now that he was gone…she tried so hard to make his presence stay, but found it impossible. She needed him, right then and there.
She let out an angry sigh. On a whim, she picked up something at random and threw it across the room, watching as it hit the wall and broke. Then, another object which held no particular value to her. She just felt angry for a reason she couldn't even explain. She needed to take her anger out on something, so whatever came in her way was fair game.
When she was done and there were glass shards, potpourri, and candle bits scattered around her, Spencer backed up against the wall, examining the damage she had done. It didn't seem to matter anymore. She slithered down the wall slowly and looked at what was left after the storm.
You did this, Spencer. It's your fault he's gone.
Before she even realized it, Spencer let out a small sob.
No…no. He left. It's obvious whatever was there isn't anymore. Maybe it didn't exist. The past is the past…you have to move onto your future.
Spencer realized what she needed was to let go of everything. She held on. Maybe that was her problem; she never knew when to move on and to let go. Maybe things could've been better for her a long time ago if she had moved on and let go of her memories and relationship with Andrew. Maybe then, she and Toby could've had a chance.
And her mind raced back to Toby.
But what if he's my future?
That was what had to happen, right? Toby just fought for her, over and over, even when she was being horrible. If she could change it, she would've. But was that enough? She wanted a future—she really did, But she almost felt as though Toby shouldn't give her another chance.
Fate will find a way.
Spencer kept hoping and praying that fate would make Toby find his way to her. She wanted—no, needed—him there with her.
Sorry if you hate me for this chapter. But I think you'll like the next one a whole lot more. So when I get 315 reviews, I'll update. And I can't even believe I'm saying that: 315 reviews. This is crazy!
Addictedtospoby: Cassidy is like four or five months old now. She's still a little tiny baby.
spoby equals awesomeness: Toby didn't yell at her! I don't think he did...anyway, Toby can't get mad at Spencer. He just loves her too much :)
Guest: Wait for it...wait for it.
mickeymack16: Taleb is the best. They're my brotp and four seasons is too freaking long to have waited for their bromance. It should've happened like the second Caleb stepped into Rosewood. They're just awesome and will live on in my fanfictions.
Spoby101: To be totally honest, I don't know why people don't like me. Maybe it's 'cause I don't talk a lot, but honestly, sometimes, it's better when people don't talk that much. And I am a hopeless romantic. That's totally me.
Onedirection2013: Next chapter is even cuter.
psychfan101: I think Jaria is much more interesting and they look cuter together. And Emily was the one who spilled the beans, which is the only reason I said it.
elenabee: You don't actually get to see the Jaria date, but it happens in Chapter 36 (it's mentioned by...some characters). And Spencer is a smarty-pants. She can just do stuff like that.
Guest (EmilyAnne): I think both. I think both when I write the chapters. And that viva la Spoby sounds familiar...MamaSpobette? I think she used that before. Anyway, thanks for reviewing again!
Spobyforever1907: I love Hanna and Taleb. There was Spoby in this chapter, and there will be in the next chapter, too. And Toby does go to New York. I'll repeat that. TOBY DOES GO TO NEW YORK.
vondydora: It's okay. And Spencer doesn't really put up a fight, but she makes her feelings very clear (for once). There will be a resolution by the end of the story, which will be over in just three more chapters+an epilogue. Hanna and Toby are also pretty good friends. They've known each other since about college or sometime around then. Hanna's known Spencer her entire life, so she knows that Spencer is being ridiculous and is being hard on her for her own good. And of course, all their friends want them to get together? Because how can you not ship Spoby?
iAmALittleLiar: Well, they talked it out! And they'll talk it out again next chapter.
Guest (Lis): Things will work themselves out NEXT chapter.
Guest (Ingrid): Oh, thank you! That means a lot to me. I'm so happy you like it.
usgrlscanrock: Not to sound conceited, I've never seen another author on this site update as frequently as I do, though I'd be really pleased if someone did that I was obsessed with one of their stories. That was the most awkward sentence ever, but oh well.
Sunset13: When you love someone, their thoughts and their feelings go above and before all of yours. That's how I see it.
Spobyluver39: Thank you!
So remember, 315 reviews=1 update. I promise the next chapter is worth it. I promise and if it doesn't meet your expectations, I'm not Kayson. -Kayson