Edward Cullen

We spent the rest of Christmas day lounging about the house in our pajamas. I played some Christmas music on my piano, Bella sitting on my lap all the while. We sat in front of the fireplace and just relaxed. It was such a nice day.

I thought about giving the ring to Bella then, but it didn't feel right. I don't know why. It needed to be more... something. More romantic maybe? Private, perhaps.

True to my word I never got out of my sleep clothes. It was kind of a tradition in my family. It was just so nice to relax, too.

We didn't have a huge dinner, just something small. Bella helped my mother in the kitchen while they prepared pot roast. Not a traditional turkey or ham dinner but good nonetheless.

I was glad the next day was just as relaxed. We didn't leave the house at all. I think Bella and I both needed it. Just to sit around and listen to music, or read. It was something that wasn't very common in our busy college lives. We never read for fun anymore.

Thoughts of the future swirled through my head. I was thinking about moving out of the dorms and buying a house for Bella and me. I loved the idea of living with her, being able to hold her every night while not having to consider who else was around. I liked having her all to myself. But, I still wanted to take her out while we were in Chicago.

We sat in my bedroom, Bella sitting between my legs as I stroked her silky long hair. "Bella, do you want to go to a concert tomorrow?"

"Sure, who's playing?" She sat against me.

"Three Doors Down. I mean, I know it's kind of old school but being so close to Christmas everything else was sold out," I said in an even tone as possible. I didn't want her to know I had already bought the tickets just in case she said yes. "It's up to you."

"Oh, that would be awesome. I'd love to go!" She turned in my lap and kissed my chin lightly.

Bella Swan

I didn't know what to wear to the venue. I mean, I knew it was casual but it was also cold outside. I pulled on some jeans and some black leather boots that went to my knees, a pair Edward bought for me. I put on a tank top, a button down shirt over that, and a sweater over that. Then I put on my new jacket over that. I felt bulky. I looked into the mirror and groaned. I putted on the winter hat, pulling it down past my ears. I even wrapped my neck in the scarf and pulled on my gloves. How did people stand the winter weather? It was far too cold. I missed the heat.

I trekked out into the living room where Edward was waiting for me. He had showered and dressed before me, giving me some privacy. We had clung together the past couple of days. I think maybe he needed a break.

I stopped when I saw Edward. He looked good enough to eat in his leather jacket and tight black jeans. His hair was covered in a black knitted cap, making his face practically snow white in comparison. He even looked good in his bulky black hiking boots. He must have heard me come in because he turned his face in my direction and smiled.

Why had I acted so cruelly the other day? I loved him no matter what. He was perfect the way he was. He didn't need to change. Not for me or anyone else.

"Look who looks ready for a snowstorm!" Carlisle teased. I blushed and ducked my head. "I think you look quite adorable, dear," he reassured me.

"Thank you," I replied with a giggle. I walked over to Edward and took his arm.

"The car should be here in a few moments," he leaned over and kissed my cheek lightly.

I offered to drive if Edward's parents would let me borrow a car but he had a point when he told me that I didn't know where anything was and that he couldn't really help me. I agreed, of course. He was right. But, I still felt bad that he was paying for another thing. I didn't say anything though.

I gazed out the window at the dimly lit streets as we rode through the city. We were both silent as we held hands. I was too deep in thought to chat. It didn't take too long for us to pull up in front of the House of Blues. Edward paid the driver before we slipped out into the freezing cold. I leaned into Edward as we trekked through the snow.

"Edward, I want to apologize," I spouted out before I could really think about it.

"Apologize for what?" He asked, confused.

"The party. I acted awful. I should have spoken to you before I got upset," I bit my lip and looked away from his handsome face.

"Isabella, I should have told you about it," he waved his hand in front of him as to sweep my concerns away. "Besides, that was days ago."

"When we get back home I would like to talk about it more. Please? I want you to blindfold me again," I squeezed his hand to show him how serious I was.

"What more is there to discuss?"

I sighed, "I want to learn more about the surgery. I want to learn more about why you don't want to do it. I want you to show me more of what it's like to be you. I want to know everything so I can help you."

"Bella, you know all that there is to know," he told me almost dismissively.

By this time we were seated at a table at the back of the room.

"That's not true and you know it."

"I don't want to bother you with this."

"You're not bothering me with it," I groaned. I didn't want this to turn into an argument but I was getting frustrated. "Stop being so damned stubborn. I just want to know. Is there anything wrong with that?"

"You shouldn't have to know these things," he said quietly, so quietly that I barely heard the words in the crowded room. "It's gross and unpleasant."

"Edward, please," I pleaded softly.

He lowered his face and sighed, "fine. We'll talk about this more after we get back to Louisiana."

"Good. Thank you," I said with a smile. I pulled my gloves off and placed them in my pocket, along with my hat.

The band came on to the stage shortly after and started to play. "There's another world inside of me you'll never see. There are secrets in this life that I can't hide. Somewhere in this darkness, there is a light that I can't find. Maybe it's too far away, Maybe I'm just blind…"

I shifted uncomfortably in my chair, biting my lip. Edward's expression was similar. He sighed and ducked his head, running his long fingers through his silky hair. His mouth was in a deep, hard line.

He huffed before pulling me out of my chair and onto his lap. The action surprised me and I almost tumbled to the ground but his strong arms held me.

"I'm scared to death," he told me in my ear.

"Of what?"

"The pain. The change. Will you still want me when I'm normal? Will I like the world I see? Can I handle it? I would have to learn so much. You just don't come out knowing what things are. I would have to learn to read and what objects are. I'd basically be going back to a toddler," he told me in my ear. "I would feel stupid. I just hate the idea so much."

"Well… Maybe. For a while. A very short while. You would catch up quickly," I tried to reassure him. "I would help."

"I would most likely have to skip a year of college and take special classes. It would be too much at once."

"Would that be so horrible?"

"I would lose my scholarship."

I scoffed, "when does money matter to you?"

He huffed and turned his face to the side, "and, then if I do this it still might not work and I'd suffer through painful surgery needlessly."

"What if it does work? You're only looking at the negatives," I ran my fingers over his cheeks. "I'm sure you can think of some positives, too."

"Of course I can. I would see you. I'd be a normal member of society. I wouldn't have to be a constant bother to everyone."

"You're not a bother! Jesus. Edward, you're one of the most amazing men I have ever met. Please, don't be ridiculous."

"Please, do not dismiss my fears," he turned his face away once again, his face slightly flushed.

I shifted in his lap so I was straddling his waist. I didn't care that we were in the middle of the show. "Edward, I'm not dismissing them. But, you shouldn't make up new ones that aren't true."

"Will you still love me if I don't do it?" His face turned back towards mine. A single tear was rolling down his cheek from behind his glasses.

"Oh, Edward! Of course, I will. I will love you no matter what. I wish... I wish you could see how much I love you but I would rather you feel it," I placed my hands on his cheeks and leaned forward. I kissed his mouth deeply.

I felt his hot tears roll down my cheeks as we continued to kiss. The world melted around us. I realized that the song had changed and it was a heavier beat. His fingers twisted in my hair, pulling rather roughly. I moaned into his mouth.

"I want you," he whispered against my lips. "Bella, let's get the hell out of here. Let's go somewhere private."

"Edward, are you sure?" I asked him quietly. My lips traveled from the base of his neck to his ear. He hissed quietly as I brought his earlobe into my mouth. I wanted him, too.

Edward Cullen

I didn't want to have this particular discussion, ever, but when the song started to play and I heard the lyrics I groaned inwardly. I swallowed my pride and decided it was now or never. I picked her up and brought her onto my lap, probably more roughly than I should have. She had to hear this and she had to hear it now.

She blew away each of my arguments, waving off my concerns but there was one that she could not do so easily. "Will you still love me if I don't do it?"

I couldn't stop the tears that welled up in my useless eyes. "Oh, Edward! Of course, I will. I will love you no matter what. I wish... I wish you could see how much I love you but I would rather you feel it."

As I felt her hands on my cheeks and her lips on my mouth I gave myself over to her and my tears.

They rolled down my cheeks hard and heavy. I brought her as close as possible so I could taste her. The vibrations of her sounds against my lips broke something inside of me. I needed to feel her love and have her feel mine. I needed to feel every part of her.

"I want you. Bella. Let's get the hell out of here. Let's go somewhere private."

"Edward, are you sure?" She whispered against my flesh. If I didn't get her out of there right away I was going to end up claiming her on the table.

"Yes. Come on. Let's get a room," I told her.

The hotel Sax was connected to the House of Blues and was supposed to be one of the nicest hotels in the city. It didn't matter at that moment, as long as I was alone with Bella.

She steered me to the front desk. I didn't think about how hard it might have been to get a room at that time of the year. We were lucky enough to get a small suite all to our own. It was all that they had left. Bella didn't argue with me spending so much money for once. I think she wanted to be alone as much as I did. Or, maybe she was too busy holding on to me to notice the price. Either way, I was grateful. I couldn't have handled the argument.

As soon as we were in the elevator I made sure no one came with us by shutting the doors. I pressed Bella against the wall and kissed her wildly. She literally squealed against my mouth in surprise at the quick action and it made me grin. Touching her made me feel alive.

When the doors opened Bella grabbed my hand and led me along. I tagged along happily. She took the key card from my hand and opened the hotel door.

"Oh, wow..." She whispered as I shut the door behind us.

"What is it?" I asked as I wrapped my arms around her waist. I kissed the nape of her neck lightly from behind.

"This room is amazing. The view is beautiful. I wish-" She started but I cut her off.

"Shhh... Maybe one day," I hushed her softly.

"I don't understand," she whimpered quietly. "It's not fair. You're so beautiful in so many ways. You deserve to see that," she almost sounded as if she was about to cry.

I spun her around, "Bella, the only reason I would ever consider the surgery is to see you."

"I don't want you to suffer because of me," her arms wrapped around my neck and she pressed her face into my chest.

"It would be worth it. Every bit of pain, just to see you for a few minutes. It would be worth it. To give my dark life some brightness. If I could see for only a few minutes and I was able to see your face then at least I'd be able to carry the image in my heart for the rest of my life. I could put a face to my dream," I told her firmly.

"Don't do it. Not for me. You should do it for yourself. Only if you want to," she cried softly, her quiet sobs rocking her against me.

"Bella, let's not talk about this anymore tonight," I soothed her quietly. "Please?"

I felt her nod against my chest and I brought her mouth to mine again. The kiss was slow and sweet. I carefully removed her jacket and let it fall to the floor. I felt her hands tugging at my jacket. "Do you know how hot you are in this?" She said with a small laugh, her voice still rough from the tears.

I chuckled, "if you say so. Hm, I wish it were a bit colder in Louisiana so I could wear it for you more often."

"I can turn down the A/C in the apartment," she teased quietly. I laughed a little. I carefully stroked her cheek from her chin to her temple, grazing my fingertips against her smooth skin. I removed my jacket and threw it to the side with hers.

She took my hand and led me somewhere. My knees hit the back of something and I sat slowly, pulling Bella on top of me. We kissed deeply, passionately. I felt as if my heart was going to thump out of my chest at the action.

I tugged at Bella's sweater and pulled it over her head. Underneath was another shirt, this one with buttons. I tried to work them carefully, simply trying not ripping the shirt off of her in frustration. I groaned when I felt another shirt underneath. "How many layers are you wearing?"

"You're used to the weather," she complained. "It's cold."

I chuckled, "yes, but we're not going snow skiing or anything."

"Are you going to keep teasing me or do you actually want me to take my clothes off?" She jokingly scolded me.

"Ah. Hm, though I do enjoy teasing you..." I pulled her shirt from her body and tossed it to the floor. "This is better."

She giggled as she tugged at my own shirt. I took it off for her and she sighed as she dragged her blunt nails down my bare chest. She pushed me so that I was laying down across the couch and she was on top of me. Bella kissed me softly, her soft hair tickling my cheeks as she hovered above me.

She kissed lightly down my chest until she was no longer above me. She tugged at my shoes, taking them off for me as quickly as possible. She crawled back up my body until her mouth rested above my belly button. She kissed it slowly, sensually, as she worked my pants and boxers off my hips.

Bella Swan

He looked amazing sprawled across the couch completely nude. I quickly wiggled out of the rest of my clothing so I could straddle his waist once again. I leaned over him and he hissed softly as my breast pressed against his chest. I removed his glasses and laid them on the side table by the couch.

"I wish you wouldn't wear your glasses all the time," I admitted. "You have beautiful eyes. I like to see them."

"If you like I won't wear them anymore when we're alone," his hand rested on my cheek, stroking it with his long fingertips.

I moved forward quickly to kiss him, showing him how much I loved that idea. I devoured his mouth, tasting all the sweetness there. His fingers twisted into my hair, keeping my lips to his as I lowered myself onto him. He groaned loudly into my mouth and I couldn't help but smile.

I pulled away from his mouth so I could sit up completely. I swirled my hips down upon him, rocking a little as I went. I watched him as he tilted his head back in pleasure. His arm reached behind him to grip the arm of the couch like if he didn't hold something he would explode. The action made all the muscles in his chest taut and it was extremely sexy.

I took his other hand and slid it from my stomach to my breast. He instantly began to massage me, biting his lip all the while. I felt so lucky to be watching him, to be with him. He was gorgeous, a god.

"God, Bella, It's probably a good thing that I can't see you right now..."

The comment surprised me and I stopped my movements. "Why?"

Both of his hands went to my hips as he carefully flipped us over so that he was on top. He lowered his mouth to my ear and whispered, "because I don't think I could handle watching your beautiful breast bounce as you glide up and down on me."

He pushed into me hard as he said the words forcing me to become completely undone. I moaned his name loudly as my back arched towards him. He moved faster and faster, pumping hard into my sensitive body.

"Edward, please... please," I chanted quietly.

"What, Bella?" He asked, continuing his fast pace. I felt as if a coil in my stomach was twisting and curling until it could not be wound up anymore. "Tell me what you want."

My nails dug into his back in frustration. It felt so good that I was almost in pain. My legs twisted around his in an effort to bring him in as close as possible. "Please..." I whimpered.

"I'm not a mind reader," he joked softly. I could feel him grinning against my flesh.

"Stop teasing me..." I asked quietly. I could tell he was having too much fun at my expense.

"I am not teasing..." he scoffed playfully. "How am I teasing you?"

"I need you! Just... just... grrr..." I stuttered my words as I blushed a violent red. I was completely frustrated. I took a deep breath trying to calm myself but that effort was lost with his every skilled movement. He knew exactly what to do. "I need-" I moaned.

"Bella, I need you, too," he said seriously. He lowered his mouth to mine and kissed me deeply. His hand slipped between our bodies where he began to stroke me gently. The coil was finally wound too tightly and it broke free. My body jerked wildly with my climax. Edward moaned loudly and I felt him fill me with his own.

We stayed heaving against each other for a long while until finally he pulled out of my tender body. I whimpered quietly, missing him instantly. He rolled over to the side and pulled me on top of him. I rested my cheek on his hard chest and listened to his musical heartbeat. He gently rubbed my back with his large, strong hands. I felt myself melt into him becoming utterly relaxed.

His chest was my pillow and his heartbeat was my lullaby. He was my comfort and my home. "I will never love anyone the way that I love you," I told him as I drifted off to sleep.

The song is When I'm gone by Three Doors Down. Yes, they're still touring lol

If you enjoyed please fave, alert and review to let me know!

Follow me on twitter kinda_randompic or facebook, Jeska Elizabeth!

Thanks for reading!