Stef looked at herself in the mirror of the large en suite bathroom. Taking in her hair, that was now short and she loved it. she looked at her neck. A number of scars on her neck. Her body was covered in them. she removed her robe and got into the warm shower that had been running for a few moments. She put her head back letting the water run over her body. What a difference six months made. She wasn't thinking about getting out of this shower and running. She knew she was safe. Her started to wash herself. Letting the water fall over her body. she looked at the scars on her stomach, on her legs. She felt an emotion, that she rarely felt towards Ella she felt anger. She wanted to scream. Out of their relationship she had come out of it the worst. Her body was marked for life. her mind was marked. Ella had got away with it.
"Honey are you okay?" Lena's voice flouted in from the other side of the door. Stef switched off the shower.
"I'm okay love," Stef said unlocking the door, allowing Lena into the room. Lena walked in and watched as Stef wrapped herself in a large purple towel. Lena noticed the light lines on her back. She walked over to her. she gently kissed the longest scar on her right shoulder. Running her lips along it.
Stef stopped.
"A wire hanger,"
"What?"
"The scar you've just kissed. she did it with a wire hanger." Stef said closing her eyes.
Lena wrapped her arms around her pulling her towards her. resting her hands against her flat stomach. Her head on her shoulder. She kissed Stef behind her ear.
"I really wish I could take those painful memories. But I know I can't. All I can do now is give you amazing memories." Lena said softly.
"You've already started doing that."
"Good, because I love you,"
"I love you too." Stef said as she ran her hand along Lena's her body was relaxing. Something she had never done with Ella.
"You're very relaxed this evening."
"I think talking about what she did too me, what happened to me is helping. Having you in my life…" Stef stopped for a moment. her body was shaking but Lena knew she wanted to carry on talking. "having you, makes me feels complete. She never loved me the way you do. I feel your love surrounding me."
"Everything we do we will do at your pace. I'm never going to rush you. I know that a loving relationship is completely new for you. But I'm not going to push you." Lena said.
Stef smiled before turning gently in her lovers arms and she put her arms around her and kissed her.
"I'm suddenly feeling very lucky." Stef said softly.
"I'm lucky one." Lena kissed her again. "Would you like some dinner?"
"Yes please."
"What would you like?" Lena asked, Stef looked at her.
She was still getting used to the fact that Lena included her in the day to day life because Ella never had. They eat and drank what Ella wanted. They didn't do anything for Stef.
"Erm."
"You can have whatever you want."
"I would love Thai food,"
"I'll order some. Put your PJ's on, I'll order the food."
"Sure,"
Stef smiled. as Lena kissed her one more time and went to order the food.
Stef changed into her favourite PJs, which was made up off a pair of lounge pants which were a little baggy and a t-shirt. She dried her hair and went into living room. smiling when she saw Lena sat with her feet up on the coffee table, reading the Thai menu. Trying to decide what to order.
"Have you ordered yet?" Stef said sitting next to her and putting her head onto her shoulder.
"Not yet, I wasn't sure what you liked," Lena said honestly.
Stef laughed. She couldn't help it.
"What are you laughing at?" Lena said turning her body to Stef.
Stef's laughter was a unique thing. Lena loved it. she knew that Stef hadn't laughed enough in her life. Ella had stopped her.
"Ella would have just ordered whatever and here you are, ten minutes after you went to order and you're sat here because you don't know what I want."
"And you find that funny,"
"Yes love, I do." Stef said,
Lena passed Stef the menu,
"Oh woman, just chose your food," Lena said good natured. "I'm going to change into my PJ's and we can have a PJ party."
Stef watched her go, smiling. this was the happiest she had been ever. Her life was falling into place.
Blog name: Better_Version
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New Post: A normal night in.
You won't believe this dear readers but tonight I've managed to completely relax with L. We had a PJ party.
She really made me laugh so hard. it was perfect.
We've eaten Thai food, my food was too hot for L, it was funny.
What made me laugh so much?
Her. I had a shower, came out and she asked me what I would like. El would never have asked me that. I didn't know how to react. But she put me at ease. We laughed. We joked. We ordered more food than we could eat. There is enough for tomorrow.
We've watched a movie together.
We've been curled up in a blanket on our couch. something I would never have done with El.
L and I made love on the sofa (just throwing that out there)
Life today was GREAT.