Nightmare

Attention/Disclaimer: D. Gray Man does not belong to me, nor do its characters, buildings, etc. ((I would rather enjoy owning Kanda, though, as I am sure many other fans would... *winks*)) Also, any events, names, or places named/written in the future that are markedly similar to anyone else's work, I'm sorry for any coincidence, but all of this is purely from my imagination. I do not copy people's work. EVER.

Chapter Twenty Five: Determination

Indeed, Kanda had to wonder just what was wrong with him. With his mind.

Currently, he was sitting in a private compartment of a newer model of a train, styled after the trains in use on the East Coast of the Americas, mainly places like Philadelphia and New York in the United States. Kanda sniffed, remembering the first time he had ever been to the Americas. The foolish Americans were materialistic and obsessed with superfluous things, every bit as bad now as the Europeans that they had tried to escape almost two hundred years before. Not to mention destructive, if every account of the American Indian massacres were true.

His mind traveled to someone else who was destructive and foolish, and felt his heart clench in pain. From the moment he had closed his door on the Moyashi, he had regretted, with every ounce of his being, the words that had come out of his mouth uncontrollably. He had still been so angry at Lavi when the Moyashi had come to speak to him, that he hadn't thought about what he would say. But, how long had it been since could he really think properly around Allen Walker?

During the three days that he had been gone on his mission, Kanda had deeply hated his wayward tongue so much so that he had refused to talk except when absolutely necessary. This only lasted a short while, long enough to make an impact on the swordsman's mind. It had given him time to think about the situation between him and Allen, and just how foolish it would be to beat himself up and hate himself for it. The only thing he really needed to do was get back to his Moyashi and find a way to apologize, while still maintaining what little pride he had left.

It had occurred to him in the early morning of the second day, after getting up from a very restless sleep, waking up in yet another cold sweat, just what Lavi might have meant when he said, "When you come back....Don't expect everything to be the same." Kanda didn't like the hidden or obvious meanings in that statement. If Lavi was planning to take Allen from Kanda, he was sorely mistaken. In fact, that thought alone made Kanda want to strangle the eccentric red-head.

"Baka Usagi....She's mine." Kanda growled under his breath, his fist clenching protectively.

The last few sun rays of the day shone into Kanda's window, lighting up his features briefly before the train curved away. Trees flashed past the window, and though Kanda stared out at the sights, his mind was far from the scenery of Eastern Sweden.

Though he had reconciled with himself, he still felt a million times the fool for his cruel words. It was his nature, if nothing else, to be bitingly sarcastic and hateful. At least on the surface, but his....love, he supposed, for the younger girl should have surpassed that.

Kanda sighed harshly and sat back in his seat, closing his eyes in frustration. There was no point in living in the past, no matter how much of a fool he could be and had been. First and foremost, he had to figure out a way to get the Moyashi back and apologize, while still acting like himself.

Given the situation, and just the kind of person that Allen Walker was, the only choice was for Kanda to be himself, and nothing more. If she cared for him for who he was, providing that she still did care, then she would understand....hopefully.

Allen looked plaintively at Lavi, who in turn was watching Allen with determination.

"I won't do it, Lavi," the girl said finally. Lavi only arched an eyebrow, making no other movement. Allen squirmed uncomfortably under his gaze, but did not crumble. Lavi's expression became more persuasive, if that was possible.

"Allen~~~!" Lavi pouted, giving up on the tough approach. Allen sighed, shaking her head stubbornly.

"I don't want to! Really, it's fine! You can, but...."

"Come on! The nurse said that it would be fine! She said that your healing progress is going as well as could be expected...." the red-head trailed off, his shoulders slumping in defeat.

"Allen-" he started, but was interrupted by the third occupant of the room.

"Allen, you can't keep yourself locked up in here forever! Sooner or later, you are going to be called out on a mission, and you will have to leave! Don't worry so much about....that." Lenalee said, stamping her foot on the stone floor. Allen looked guilty.

"You make it sound like I'm hiding from him..." she sighed. The looks the she received showed that the other two weren't fooled.

"Allen, you haven't left this room since Kanda left! You have barely even got up from that bed!"

"That's not true! I went to Komui's office at one point!" Allen argued, but knowing that other two were right.

"Come on, Allen-chan! You need to get out of here! We aren't even going that far! A couple of hours to get to London, a few hours shopping and going to cafes; what will it hurt??" Lenalee demanded, stamping her foot once again. Allen sighed, but finally nodded.

"Okay then! Let's go get you dressed, showered and re-bandaged, and then we will be on our way!" Lavi said happily.

"Get to your room and we will meet you at the underground entrance in an hour. Hurry, hurry!" Allen nodded and got out of her bed for the first time in a few days (other than for the obvious necessities). She left the room, smiling weakly, but somehow gratefully, at Lavi and Lenalee.

They watched after her even after she disappeared from their view.

"Does she....Hmmm..."

"Does she what?" Lavi asked, looking at Lenalee. The Chinese girl shrugged, pursing her lips.

"Does she seem tired? Even more than her wounds should warrant?" Lenalee asked, her expression full of worry and concern. Lavi patted her shoulder comfortingly.

"I noticed too...Maybe....this trip will help her." Lavi said, nudging the shorter girl gently.

"Now, come on, let's go tell your brother that we are actually leaving. He will be pleased to learn that we won Allen-chan over."

Kanda stepped out of the boat, looking up at the aged stones of the underground entrance of his home. He had spent all night traveling, and, though he was obscenely tired, he had something to do and would not go to sleep until he had completed it.

Moyashi...he thought, taking a deep, steadying breath. He finally looked around the platform to see two people waiting patiently, facing the stairs. The bright red hair was a tell-tale sign and Kanda immediately glared.

The Baka Usagi had better not done anything-!

Said Baka Usagi stiffened when he felt the cold glare aimed at him back and slowly turned around, thinking of only one of two people who could send such a chill down his spine.

"Yuu-chan!!!" he cried happily. The person standing next to Lavi turned as well.

"Welcome home, Kanda." she said, smiling. Kanda did not cease his glare, but swiftly passed both of them and headed up the stairs with quick steps. He could feel the stares of the other two as he walked away, but said nothing. He had one thing on mind and Lavi's comment would have to wait.

Some small part of Kanda's brain told him to go to Allen's room as oppose to the Medical Wing, where Allen had been since she had returned from the disastrous last mission.

His heart was pounding fiercely in his chest, the only sign that betrayed his cool façade.

Moyashi.....Moyashi!! his heart cried, making his strides faster.

He finally turned the last corner, almost at a run, Kanda felt his heart stutter, almost stop, and then regain it's fierce beating.

There she was.

"Moyashi..." he whispered under his breath, relief washing through his body. Allen had just closed her door and turned to face him when she stopped as well. Her emotions were splayed across her face openly; first relief, then hope, hesitance, and finally pain, all in the blink of an eye.

"K-Kanda..." she said softly, swallowing nervously. She stared at him, trying desperately to get past that emotionless mask. Finally, Allen saw some spark of warmth hidden in the vast depths of Kanda's dark, exotic eyes. It was just a spark, but it greatly relieved the younger girl.

After what felt like forever, Kanda moved towards her, his stride, at first reluctant and broken, but then it gained confidence.

"Moyashi..." he said again, loud enough for her to hear.

"That isn't my name." Allen responded automatically, though it was obvious her heart wasn't into it. Her heart pounded loudly in her chest as she watched him approach. A small part of her wanted to run, just run away before that cruel tongue of his could lash out at her heart, but Allen Walker was stronger than that. Yes, much stronger....

Well, I know that this wasn't as long as it should be...I'm sorry.

But...there is your new chapter. I wish I could have had more chapters out through Thanksgiving Break, but....Late Monday through Wednesday my computer was out, Thursday was Thanksgiving, and Friday(yesterday) I went with a BIG group of my friends to go see the movie Twilight...((Which was KICK-ASS!!! I wanna see it again!))

Also, for a while, it was hard for me to write this, as I am currently re-reading Hana-Kimi, at least, up to volume 14 (since that is the last volume I have been able to buy). I kept thinking as such:

Allen = Mizuki

Kanda = Sano

It was very confusing.

Now...On to business:

Okay, if you are reading this, I have an offer for you. You see, I have two endings for this story...Which, yes, it is ending. Very soon.

So...there are one of two ways to go. One we shall call the "special ending", which is probably what you are all hoping for. And the other, is not as special. It is the same premise, but a lot less.....interesting for you.

For the special ending, I would like...Hmmm...To be reasonable, 25 reviews, for this chapter alone. I was going to go for a higher number, as I know that a lot more than 25 people read this, but I will be fair.

A hint: To acquire that number, if you are reading this right now, you should just click that little review button down there.*nods* Right now.

For the less interesting ending, my normal reviewers can review, ((I love you guys, by the way^_^ You were my inspiration to keep writing this.)) but the rest of you can just go about your merry way.

In any case, I leave it up to you. I won't, however, take pity if you get within one review of the goal, in fact, I will just post the boring ending, and you'll have to deal.

Another incentive, though, is if you reach that goal and go past it, I might consider an epilogue.^_^ ((Which I think you will like.))

Just remember. If you aren't contemplating reviewing RIGHT NOW....Then this story will end. The boring way. And then there will be no epilogue. It will just. End.

((And I REALLY, REALLY hope you ALL review..*nods*))

With much love,

Maze Puppet. ((Sorry about the super-long A/N...'Tis necessary.))