Chapter 25 Why can't we?

Raven's eyes burst open in the morning from the worst sleep she had ever had, it wasn't the same. Everything about it was wrong, starting with the bed. She was in her own bed, in her usual pjs and as always alone. Pain rocketed up her hand making her look at it and giggle, "Oh thats right, the hammer" Pulling herself up she hoped Izzy could inform her on what happened after the morphine was injected, that was the biggest issue so far, not remembering what exactly she had done and said between the morphine and going to bed. Hopefully it wasn't like last time when she knocked out some girl then her meat-headed boyfriend came round wanting some, true to Raven fashion she gave him some alright, it meant her harpoon was taken away but it was well worth it. Come to think of it, she actually couldn't remember why she even had a harpoon in the first place. It took her a little longer than usual to get dressed, her hand decided it didn't want her wearing clothing, Raven would of agreed if she actually wasn't cold, Raven didn't like wearing clothes, all they did was restrict and restrain. Two things she couldn't bear, in any circumstance. When she was done, she marched inside hoping Izzy was at the table waiting, instead she got John and his breakfast, she wasn't sure what it was but it smelt good, too bad she probably couldn't eat it. He gave her a big grin as his blue eyes lit up. "Morning Raven"

"Hi. Reason your staring at me like that?"

He just shrugged, not telling her anything.

"Have you seen Izzy this mornin?"

"Yeah, she went to work."

"Damn"

"Somethin I could help with?"

"Just wonderin if she could fill me in what happened between the morphine and me going to bed"

His whole face fell as he got the horrible truth, she had no clue of what she said last night, he was waiting for something that was said under the influence of drugs, which meant she didn't mean it.

"I don't know" John spat out icily before charging up to his room, again to nurse a cracked heart.

"Ok, I've done somethin really bad to piss him off" Raven said aloud glad that Izzy wasn't there to question it, Raven could only sit at the table and think hard, what did she do to John that had made him so damn angry? That was todays mystery.

John slammed the door shut with such force the whole wall rattled. John just didn't get it, life could be very un-fair when it wanted. John as always went back to the comparisons, he knew that only made things worse but he couldn't help it. Randy, who was the worlds greatest prick to women got the girls hanging off him, but he, well he was the one always winding up with the hurt heart, through it he had to smile, they were getting better at it, instead of being cheating gold-digging whores, it only took words this time, of course he didn't expect any thing less outta Raven, even her mistakes reeked of perfection. Harsh banging and his name suddenly engulfed him. "John?" Two bangs, "John?" Two bangs "John?" Two bangs before he opened the door.

"What?"

"Hi" Raven said with a little giggle before turning serious, pulling out a long bit of paper with her tidy scrawl. "Ok, I have no clue what I did to you last night so I have made a list, I'm hopin you will have enough patience to let me go through it"

John let out an angry sigh, she had already cracked his heart, did she really have to finish the job? Yes, according to Izzy, Raven never did anything half heartedly. "Fine"

"Alright" Raven looked at her list "Did I bite you?"

"No"

"Did I call some sort of insulting name?"

"No"

"Did I smack you with the cast or one of your friends or girlfriends?"

"No, and I don't have any girlfriends, just you, my sexy buddy"

"Right, well that takes care of that. Ok, did I insult your family?"

"No"

"Did I punch you with my good hand?"

"No" John was starting to grow tired of her list, she had everything but the right thing.

"Did I say something to you that you didn't want to hear, for example, your not as good as Brock Lesnar. Wait, scratch that, even on drugs I wouldn't say that. I hate him, oh man I really hate him" Raven quickly crossed it out, she didn't want to get distracted with her hatred for that man, him and the French. "Ok did I say something that made you happy but now that you think about it, it hasn't made you happy"

"Yeah, I guess thats it"

"Haha! Right, give me a moment and I'll be back with another list of things I could of said, oh thats gonna be fun"

John couldn't help it, that smile crossed his face before he could stop it, his way of knowing Raven was through her sister, Iziah was more than happy to 'warn' him about Raven, according to Izzy, she wasn't the one to watch out for, it was Raven. One thing he told her straight off the bat, Raven only tried this hard when she wanted something so badly she would kill for it. From the look in her eyes, he guessed that she would kill something so he wouldn't be angry at her anymore. Taking her lips in his, he let himself push aside last night, he didn't have a defenite answer so maybe he should stop assuming he knew, truth was, he wasn't sure of anything anymore. Raven forgot what she did wrong, his lips telling her that it was ok, at least for now. He pulled away much too soon for her liking.

"John whatever I did to upset you, I'm sorry, really I am"

He touched her face softly with his thumb, he had seen so many sides to her it was a little dizzying. "Don't worry about it, I was being an idiot."

"So we're ok?"

"Yeah, we're good"

She hugged him happily, her arms just managing to reach around his bulky frame. Deep inside a spark ignited, ignited so brightly she litterly lept away from him, blushing. "Sorry, I must go now. Superman away!"

Raven flew so fast down the stairs and out to her room, she really could of been superman.

Iziah got home just after eight, as always washing her bloody hands in her sister's prized sink. Izzy ignored the insults her sister puffed out, Iziah's happy mood just couldn't be ruined, not today. Work was all normal, cut up the body, label the jars, sew it up. All the same until her boss told her she had a visitor, she expected Raven but instead got her mystery man from the weekend, Iziah was pleasantly surprised, right there in the morgue they had a typical romantic moment, it was all she could of hoped for. Now that she was happy nothing could ruin that, nothing. Not even a whore. Thats just how happy she was. Raven asked her very nicely to go and ask John if he wanted some dinner, doing a small task like that was fine by her now. Happily she trudged up the stairs to his room, raising her hand she suddenly stopped, his manly voice sinking into her.

"Best lay ever, I'm tellin you, lips like silk"

Iziah couldn't stop listening, her smile growing, she hated gossip but when it was juicy like this she couldn't help herself. Before he got off the phone, Iziah jumped down the stairs, her grin wider than ever.

"What?" Raven asked from her computer not looking up at all, from the way the vibrations ran up her seat Iziah was jumping.

"Omg! Omg! Omg!"

"What?"

"So good! Juicy even!"

"What?"

"I was just upstairs about to ask John for dinner and I overheard something"

Raven rolled her eyes finally looking up at her sister, "Don't go around listenin to people's private conversations, its rude"

"I don't care, you should of heard it Rae, apparently the girl he's banging now is better than any girl he's ever had"

Raven kept the blush to herself as Iziah went into more detail about what John had said. It was flattering in its own weird way. Raven couldn't help the sudden interest, now she had to know more. John came down the stairs, smiling as usual but his eyes were brighter than ever.

"Hi John" Izzy said slyly "How are you? Highly satisfyed?"

"What?"

"Well a little birdy told me" "Izzy shut it, and stop listenin in on peoples conversations"

"You were listening?"

"Iziah stop it or else something real bad is gonna happen, somethin so bad that I don't even know what that is yet"

Iziah huffed an insult but kept quiet about what she had heard, John however was slightly freaking out, hopefully Iziah hadn't heard anything incriminating, that would be bad. Apparently. Dinner was the usual, they talked about the day and just safe topics. Until Iziah couldn't control herself any longer.

"So John, you and this girl, how long you been together?"

"Not long" John shot a look at her sister "Why so interested anyways?"

"Just curious, I've never seen her or even knew she exsisted"

"I'm allowed to have a private life you know"

"Yes he is now Iziah shut it before I take this fork and jam it in your pretty little eyeball and mail it to your sister"

"Fine" Iziah huffed, however Raven couldn't help it, she had to ask the burning question in her skull.

"John can I ask you a wrestling question?"

"Sure"

"If two guys are in a no DQ match then does that mean that your new girl is better in the sack then your ex-wife?"

"Raven!" Iziah looked to her sister in surprise before looking to John "Does it?"

John pushed his chair back, a little annoyed yet amused. "Why are you two so fixated on this?"

"Because if I were that girl and I had just heard that I was the best you had had I'd wanna do this" Raven suddenly lept up and started doing a victory dance, her arms twirling in a circle, pure happiness on her face. John stormed upstairs muttering insults and annoyance.

"Oops I think we made him mad" Izzy giggled "Who wants to say their sorry?"

"I will" Raven sighed, "I'll apogolize and you can go and rent a movie, possibly something with a mean twist, like Saw, oh wait, Bloodlust 2"

"Alright" Iziah quickly grabbed her keys and escaped, she would rather spend hours at the movie store trying to pick a movie they hadn't seen then apologize, she would always take the other option if it meant getting out of apologizing.

Raven tapped on his door timidly, she wasn't even sure why John was even mad, but she picked it had something to do with her gloating and victory dance, that was actually pretty fun for her but she couldn't admit to that, he was already angry and annoyed.

"What?" John yanked the door open, his blue orbs suddenly hard. It was hard to see his soft orbs like that but thats just how it was.

"Can we talk?"

"No"

"Please?"

He held the door open so they could have some privacy, "So?"

"John I'm sorry that I annoyed you, but it was just good news to me"

"What? Why?"

Raven let out a held breath before plonking down on the edge of his bed, "I'm not very good at this sort of thing, all aspects of relationships I fail at, to hear that I was doing somethin right, and better than any one else at something I'm not very good at, well it made me very happy. So I'm sorry that you made me happy, and I'm sorry about the dance, I just couldn't help it"

John sat next to her and took her hand, "Raven can I point something out, something you might not see"

"Whats that?"

"We're in a relationship"

"What? No we're not, I can tell if that were the case"

"How?"

"Because I wouldn't be happy, whenever I'm in a relationship I'm un-happy. I'm happy therefore, no relationship. See, simple math right there"

John latched to her chin, making those silver pools look deep at him, almost through to his soul. "Why can't we try? So far everything is alright, why won't you give me a chance?"

"John" Raven said soflty, moving her eyes from his, it was just too hard and scary.

"I'm only asking for a chance Raven, I'm not sure how much longer I can wait"

Raven wanted to say yes, every inch of her pushed her to say yes but her one ally, her brain, told her to wait, just resist a little longer until you figure things out. For the first time since starting this thing with John she was happy for her cell ringing. She was even happier that it was work ringing, "We'll talk about this later, ok?"

She didn't even give him a chance to reply, she flipped up the phone and ambled out.