Suicide Squad: Ballroom Blitz
Chapter 25 - Just the Beginning
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Author's Note: A bit of a warning... I never really read a lot of DC comic books as a kid, so instead, I watched the cartoons and tv shows and animated/live-action movies and whatnot.
So, there may be certain times in the story where the characters may seem OOC, and for that, I do apologize, cause I am simply going from what I've seen on film and television, as well as the Internet.
And I am obviously way beyond the end of the movie, but honestly, at this point, I just care about making a good story.
Also, again, thank you so much to everyone who's been enjoying the story and leaving reviews, I really appreciate it!
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Disclaimer: Warner Bros. and DC are the rightful owners of "Suicide Squad", the DCEU, its characters, etc, and I am the rightful owner of this story, the characters I create, etc.
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Later that night, once the three of them were locked back up in the prison, Deadshot was now laying down on the cot while Harley was sitting up on top of him.
"So, come on, Shot, what was it you wanted to tell me?"
The assassin said, "It doesn't really matter anymore, Harley... maybe everything that happened tonight was, like, a sign or something that it's not the right time yet."
"Well, when will it be the right time?"
Deadshot replied, "I really don't know... a year, maybe? These things take time, Harley, I don't want to rush it."
"Then, can you promise me that you'll tell me when the time comes?"
He laughed a little bit before saying, "All right, doll face, I promise..."
Harley smiled widely before leaning down to give him a kiss, and once they paused for a moment to catch their breaths, she started to straddle him.
"Well, what do we do in the meantime, then, handsome?"
Deadshot gave her a smirk, and said, "I think I have some ideas..."
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4th-Wall Break
"Whoops, sorry about that!"
All of a sudden, everything went blank, and there was nothing but empty space.
"Hey, wise guy, over here!"
The camera turned to the side, and revealed a man in a red-and-black suit and mask, holding a microphone.
"This thing on?" He yelled. "Hello, testing, testing, one, two, three, yo, hello!"
Once the sound of the microphone was fixed, he tossed it to the side, saying, "Aw, who am I kidding? You guys are probably reading this on a phone or computer or tablet or Kindle or whatever the fuck you guys are using these days... so unless you're a blind person, and I'm sorry for those that are and trying to enjoy this story...
"Oh, wait, what am I saying? A blind person probably wouldn't have even made it past the first chapter!"
Deadpool began to laugh at his own joke.
"Anyway, for any of the clueless shitbags that have no idea who the fuck I am, my name is Deadpool. Ring any bells yet?
"I had a dope ass movie last year, which got a way better tomato rating than Man of Steel, BvS, and Suicide Squad..."
Deadpool waited a moment before continuing on, as if he was hoping for the audience to catch on.
"Okay, so anyway, for everyone else who knows exactly who I am, and is wondering why I'm even here... well, if this were a movie, for example, I'm here to explain that what happens next is pretty much almost like a re-enactment of the sex scene that happened in my movie with me and Vanessa.
"You know, the one with the sex montage? That made Ryan Reynolds' little girl call out Da-Da when she and Mommy saw it on a plane? Well, the author is gonna write his little 'bonus' scenes, and what takes place immediately after those scenes are the ones that happen in my movie so just imagine those in your head, but replace me and Vanessa with Deadshot and Harley..."
"Hey, wait a minute... Deadshot... Deadpool..."
Then, he brought his hands to his face, and gasped. "Oh, my god! We even have the same colors in our outfits."
"Hey!"
Deadpool turned around, and waved. "Oh, hey there, Big Willie!"
"What are you doing here, Wilson?" said Deadshot. "We talked about this... DC vs MARVEL was one thing, but-"
"Oh, relax, Agent J," replied Deadpool. "No need to flash anything at me or welcome me to Earth, I only came here to explain to the readers and the other fuckheads what-"
"Hey, man, come on, ease up on the F word, there are kids reading this!"
Deadpool laughed. "Really, Detective Spooner? Have you even seen the new generation right now? They learn bitch and asshole before they even get up to motherfucker."
"I am warning you, Wade," said Deadshot, frowning.
"All right, just relax, Oscar, don't go all zombie hunter on me and drop me in a tub or something with jellyfish inside."
Deadshot looked at him like he was insane.
"You know, we're almost exactly the same."
Deadshot replied, "No way in hell is that true."
"No, really, come on, I wear a red-and-black suit, you wear a red-and-black suit...
"I wear a red mask with white eye covers, you have a white mask with a red Terminator eye thingy..."
"Get to the point, Wilson!"
"I will, just wait a sec... and since you're actually here right now, let me just say that it feels great knowing that none of... Well, except for Civil War, but I love knowing all of the other comic book films that have been released have not been able to catch up to the heights that my movie brought to the table."
Not this shit again, thought Deadshot
Deadpool then began counting his fingers. "I mean, I had an R rating, more blood, more pussy... sort of... a better villain, not no ninja turtle reject or evil dancing queen... um, better editing..."
"All right, Wilson, I get it," exclaimed Deadshot. "But everyone is entitled to their opinion, and this is not a movie-"
"Yeah, I know, it's a fanfic story," replied Deadpool. "And since it isn't rated M, I came to explain that, if it were a movie, they should imagine in their minds the sex scenes from my movie, which take place almost directly after the author's scenes, but instead of me and my girl, it'll be you and Harley."
Deadshot sighed, and crossed his arms. "You done now, slick? We got a story to continue with..."
The mercenary groaned, and said, "Okay, fine, I'll go... But can I do two more things before we go back to the story?"
Rolling his eyes, Deadshot said, "Okay, fine, what is it?"
Turning his attention to the readers, Deadpool whispered, "Spoiler Alert: Someone dies later on, you never see it coming... Oh, and don't worry, I'll be back at the end!"
"Wade!"
Deadshot cried, "Okay, Fresh Prince, just chill for a second! There's still one more thing."
"Yeah, okay, what?"
"Cue the music..."
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I love, I love, I love my calendar girl
Yeah, sweet calendar girl
I love, I love, I love my calendar girl
Each and every day of the year
"Has it been a year yet?" asked Harley.
Deadshot rolled his eyes.
"Okay, my bad..."
(January)
You start the year all fine
(February)
You're my little Valentine
Harley looked up at Deadshot, and smiled. "Thanks for the roses... and I'm sorry about not showing appreciation for the ones you got me back in San Fran."
"Don't worry about it," smiled the assassin. "Now, what did you say you wanted to do when we got back to the prison?"
(March)
I'm gonna march you down the aisle
(April)
You're the Easter bunny
When you smile
When Deadshot came into the cell, he was surprised to see that Harley wasn't there.
"Where could she..." said Deadshot, but then, he noticed a book and a black gift bag on the table.
Yeah, yeah
My heart's in a whirl
I love, I love, I love my little calendar girl
Walking over to it, Deadshot frowned in disgust when he read the title, but after looking inside the bag, he gulped, his eyes growing wide.
"This cannot be good..."
Every day (every day)
Every day (every day)
Of the year (every day of the year)
Deadshot paused their love-making session to ask, "Hey, uh... What are you giving up for Lent?"
(September)
I light the candles at your sweet sixteen
"Hmmm..." said Harley. "I think the usage of all my weapons. You?"
"I was just going to not kill anyone in the head."
Before continuing with the sex, Harley said, "Eh, sounds all right to me."
(October)
Romeo and Juliet on Halloween
"Ow... Ow, Shot!"
Deadshot brought his head up, and Harley laughed when she saw him wearing a plastic pair of fanged teeth.
"Sorry... Happy Halloween?"
Yeah, yeah
My heart's in a whirl
I love, I love, I love my little calendar girl
After cleaning up the massacre of food, Deadshot smiled, knowing that his "moment" was coming soon.
Every day (every day)
Every day (every day)
Of the year (every day of the year)
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(Early December)
With some help from Rick, Deadshot was able to drive himself and Harley to a particular romantic spot up in the mountains.
"Shot? Why are we coming here?" asked Harley. "You know it's dark, right?"
As he parked the car, Deadshot gave Harley a kiss, and after they finished, he said, "I made a promise, remember? Just wait here for, like, a minute."
She began to pout. "You had me wait almost a whole year, Shot..."
"Yeah, I know, but a minute or two won't kill you, doll face, all right?"
Harley giggled, and she said, "Well, hurry up, handsome."
As she laid back in her seat, Deadshot went towards a spot he'd told Rick to prepare for him.
Feeling the small object in his pocket, Deadshot smiled. It's time.
Then, suddenly, his cellphone rang.
She really wants to know, huh?
Deadshot answered it, saying, "You really trying to test me, huh?"
"Having fun?"
His smile immediately went away.
"Now, let me try to remember something... How long did you say what wouldn't kill Harley? A minute or two?"
Right away, Deadshot turned back around, and yelled out, "Harley!"
Ka-Boom!
The last thing that Deadshot remembered before hitting the ground was seeing a flash of white.
"Shot!"