I'll Defend You If You'll Defend Me?
25
Summary: Becky Jackson is trying to survive high school the best that she can. While Santana Lopez is struggling to accept herself and be proud of the person she has become. Can these two people become friends and help each other succeed?
Pairings: Santana Lopez and Becky Jackson. Other pairings: Rachel Berry and Santana Lopez. Brittany Pierce and Santana Lopez. Quinn Fabray and Brittany Pierce. Also other characters have small parts.
It's important to note, that I do not have Down syndrome, but I am "different". I know what it feels like to feel unworthy at time and like no matter what I try to do it's useless.
I hope you enjoy!
~ Santana ~
I had a big secret! This secret changed my life forever.
Remember the morning after Rachel and I first undressed each other and then said, "I love you!" to each other? Well when we finally settled down to go to sleep that night, I just couldn't. My mind was in overdrive.
I need to show her how I ultimately feel about her. I want to get her something life changing. I GOT IT! I thought beyond happily. I felt asleep rather quickly with the love of my life in my arms.
The next morning, I got dressed as quietly as possible and ran out of the house.
I sped off. I believed that my car knew where I needed to go first.
Within minutes, I found myself outside her house. I turned the car off and bolted to their door. I rang the bell a few times before her Dad opened it for me.
"Santana, what's wrong? Is Rachel okay?" Hiram asked me worried.
"Rachel's fine. I'm sorry. I need to speak to you and Leroy for a quick minute," I asked urgently.
"Come in," he said and let me inside.
Leroy was jogging down the stairs. "Good morning, Santana. To what do we owe this early morning pleasure," he asked.
"I need your blessing to do something major!" I said excitedly.
"What?" Hiram asked.
"Eh, do you mind if I not tell you, now. I'm sure that you'll hear it when she screams after I ask her," I said nervously.
I stared Leroy down and he, suddenly, understood what I meant.
"I know, Santana," he said beyond happily. He smiled.
"I'm missing something," Hiram said and scratched his head.
"Well, sir, I asked you last night if I 'passed the test', remember?"
"Yes," Hiram said and nodded. He folded his arms against his chest.
"I was hoping that I did because I knew I'd be in this situation with you two sometime. I didn't think it would be today, but ultimately I knew," I said and smiled.
"Knew what?"
"That I want and intend on spending the rest of my life with your daughter," I said humbly.
"Santana, are you asking us for permission to, ya know," Hiram asked.
"Let's clarify what you mean," Leroy told his husband.
"To have sex, eh, make love to our daughter," he explained.
My face fell just for a second.
"I think, and correct me if I'm wrong, Santana, that she wants permission to do 'something else' for Rachel," Leroy said.
"It's too early in the morning for this," Hiram said as he got a little annoyed.
"Do you trust me," I asked.
"Yes," Leroy said immediately.
"Yes," Hiram said after he thought it over for a minute.
"Then trust in my knowing what I'm doing," I asked.
"Okay, Santana," Leroy said, "When will this be happening?"
"Um, not today. It will happen when it feels 'right' to me." I smiled and took a big sigh of happiness and relief.
I started to walk to their front door. "Thank you both. You okay, Hiram," I asked with a smile.
"I'm still confused," he said, "But I trust that you know what you're doing even though I may not. I know you wouldn't intentionally hurt our baby girl."
I smiled at Rachel's father and he smiled back at me.
"I'll tell him," Leroy said.
"Ok, thanks. If you have a questions please call me and not Rachel. I want this to be a surprise so if you could not say anything I'd truly appreciate it."
"Will do," they said in unison.
"Bye," I said as I ran to my car. Before I drove off, I heard a big holler so I knew that Leroy filled him in.
With their permission and one additional stop I found myself all prepared.
I wanted to wait until we both were sure and I came to realize that we were ready after the first time we made love.
Do this when you both are relaxed and not stressed with schoolwork. My heart said.
~ Rachel ~
The whole month before the weekend getaway with our friends, Santana seemed weird to me. I didn't know how to explain. She was so happy so that was a plus. She said, "I love you" to me all the time both in private and in school. She held me close ever time we made love. All good things!
"Santana, are you okay," I asked a few times.
"I'm wonderful cuz I have you," she said and smiled at me.
"Oh ok," I said and smiled.
~ Becky ~
I ran to Noah and jumped into his arms. He caught me and kissed me sweetly right there in the middle of the crowded hallway at school. When we stopped kissing we heard some applause and saw Santana and Rachel applaud us. He placed me down, grabbed my hand, and we bowed.
"Haha! You ready to get the 'H-E- double hockey sticks' outta here," Santana said and jumped up and down.
"Yea, I am," I said and smiled.
"Follow us," she said as we left school and got into our cars.
I held Noah's free hand the whole way up there. He smiled at me when we stopped at red lights.
Pretty soon all three cars pulled into the driveway.
Quinn and Britt had gone food shopping the night before and had all of the stuff in their car with ice packs just in case.
"We need a big strong man to carry these in," Quinn hinted. Noah looked around and behind him.
"Baby, I think she means you," I said and slapped his arm.
"Oh, right, then I'll get our luggage," he said.
"If you could," Santana said and extended her keys to him.
"Haha, you made a funny!" he said and walked past her.
She smirked at him a little.
We emptied the cars and went inside.
"Wow, Britt, cool house," I exclaimed.
"Thank you," Britt answered, "We all here? Ok…good. Tour time."
She and Quinn showed us around. We picked rooms and emptied our suitcases.
"We're gonna start dinner," Quinn yelled and she and Brittany jogged down the stairs.
~ Santana ~
As I was unpacking my suitcase, I found Rachel's present and my iPod hidden at the bottom. I grabbed the two items and stuffed them into my jeans as quickly as possible. I looked behind me and was relieved to know that she wasn't in the room at that moment. She walked in a few seconds later.
"What cha doing," she said as she enveloped me in a hug.
"Nothing, just thinking about you," I said honestly as I rested my head on her shoulder.
"Oh really," she asked.
"Yes, Rachel, I actually have a surprise for you."
She released me to jump up and down. "Can I have it…can I have it?" she shouted.
"Have what?" Becky said as she ran into our room.
"San's has a surprise for me," Rachel said as she continued to jump up and down.
"Wow!" I said as I saw her reaction which made me smile.
"Please?" she said and looked at me endearingly.
"Later, after dinner," I said almost like a parent.
Oh, okay," she pouted, but smiled immediately after.
Becky laughed and then said, "Let's go see if they need help."
We all ran down the stairs.
"Need help," Becky asked first.
"Um, no, I think we got it," Quinn said as Brittany hung up the phone.
"Dinner should be here in twenty," she said proudly.
"My hero," Quinn said as she ran up to her and kissed her sweetly.
"Where's my man," Becky asked.
"I dunno. Where'd you put him," I asked.
"NOAH!" Becky yelled.
"I'm upstairs," he yelled back, "Be right there…"
He came down the stairs with his guitar.
"Doesn't he look so cute holding that guitar," Becky asked.
"Um, I guess…" Brittany said as she made her signature expression.
"Becky, I'm sorry but you're not gonna get a 'yes' from this crowd…" Quinn pointed out.
"Oh, yeah, I forgot, Q!" she said and playfully smacked her forehead.
Pretty soon the pizza arrived and we devoured it. Afterwards we all got into our pajamas and I remembered what I needed.
"I swear if any of you, besides you, honey, tell anyone I wear pj's I'll be pissed," Puck said and we all laughed. We sat down in the living room and held our respective partners.
~ Quinn ~
Then Puck started to strum his guitar and start to sing.
~ Puck ~
Sometimes late at night
I lie awake and watch her sleeping
She's lost in peaceful dreams
So I turn out the lights and lay there in the dark
And the thought crosses my mind
If I never wake up in the morning
Would she ever doubt the way I feel
About her in my heart
~ Quinn ~
Rachel was swaying back and forth on the couch as she massaged Santana's hand with her own. All of a sudden she started to sing.
~ Rachel ~
If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
And she must face this world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes
~ Quinn ~
Puck noticed this and kept playing the guitar. He smiled at her as he played. Santana looked over at her girlfriend and smiled. Then she nuzzled against Rachel's body. I was sitting in between Britt's legs on the floor with my head on her chest. Our hands were joined.
~ Brittany ~
'Cause I've lost loved ones in my life
Who never knew how much I loved them
Now I live with the regret
That my true feelings for them never were revealed
So I made a promise to myself
To say each day how much she means to me
And avoid that circumstance
Where there's no second chance to tell her how I feel
~ Quinn ~
I was shocked to hear Britt sing. Her grip on my hand tightened. She looked down at me when she finished her verse and smiled.
~ Noah, Rachel, and Brittany ~
If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
And she must face this world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes
~ Noah ~
So tell that someone that you love
Just what you're thinking of
If tomorrow never comes
~ Quinn ~
Santana, Becky, and I applauded after the song was over.
"Was that planned," San asked shocked.
"No, Lopez, it actually wasn't. That song just came to me," Puck said.
"Wow!" Becky yelled, smiled, and then kissed her boyfriend.
"Who wrote that," Santana asked.
"Ronan Keating, he wrote a song from that movie, uh, 'Notting Hill' with semi-sexy Julia Roberts," Noah said and looked to Becky.
"Noah, it's alright…Julia Roberts is hot!" Becky encouraged him.
"I knew I loved you," he said and she kissed him.
The room went quiet immediately. We all stared at them while they kissed.
"Aww!" we all yelled at them after the kiss.
"Yes, it's official…we're in love," Puck said happily. Becky blushed and smiled.
Santana reached over to give Becky a high five, which she smacked. Then Santana asked, "Puck, could I borrow your girl?"
"Are you gonna give her back?"
"She better," interrupted Rachel, "No offense, Becky, but I don't share important things and people in my life."
"None taken," Becky said and smiled at Rachel.
While Rachel and Becky were talking, I noticed Santana searching her iPod for a song.
~ Santana ~
Once I found the perfect song for what I was about to do, Becky noticed and started talking.
"What's up?" she asked.
"I need a wing person," I said and smiled.
"What do you need," she asked.
I handed her my iPod and told her, "When I give you the signal, press play. Don't look at the song, just press play."
"I think I can do that," she said and gave me the thumbs up sign.
"Great," I said as I threw my arm over her shoulder and guided her back to the group. She immediately sat in between Puck's legs with her back against his chest.
I stood facing them for a few seconds. Eventually they stopped talking.
"Ok, okay," I said, "I have a little surprise for my girl."
I saw Rachel clap her hands excitedly. "Do I need to get up or anything?"
"No, honey, you're good right where you are…on the couch." I said with a smile.
She smiled warmly at me.
"Maestro, if you please?" I asked, looked at Becky and then turned around. Becky immediately hit play and the melody of the song started to play. I shook my behind at the crowd. Then with the first verse, I whipped around and started to sing.
105 is the number that comes to my head
When I think of all the years I wanna be with you
Wake up every morning with you in my bed
That's precisely what I plan to do
I began to snap my fingers and step to the left and to the right. I know my choreography wasn't brilliant, but I was hoping that she'd not hold it against me. I wanted her to concentrate on the words.
And you know one of these days when I get my money right
Buy you everything and show you all the finer things in life
We'll forever be in love, so there ain't no need to rush
But one day, I won't be able to ask you loud enough
With the next verse, I stopped dancing and sat down on the floor in front of her.
I'll say will you marry me
I swear that I will mean it
I'll say will you marry me
She brushed the side of my face with her palm. She looked me in the eyes.
How many girls in the world can make me feel like this?
Baby I don't ever plan to find out
The more I look, the more I find the reasons why
You're the love of my life
You know one of these days when I get my money right
Buy you everything and show you all the finer things in life
We'll forever be in love, so there ain't no need to rush
But one day, I won't be able to ask you loud enough
Rachel was a smart person, but I truly believe she had no idea where this song would end. I believed that she thought that I was talking about in the future.
I'll say will you marry me
I swear that I will mean it
I'll say will you marry me
She smiled at me and looked deeply into my eyes. She whispered, "I love you."
I smiled, but kept singing. I needed to finish this song.
And if I lost everything
In my heart it means nothing
'Cause I have you, girl I have you
So get right down on bended knee
Nothing else would ever be
Better, better
The day when I say
I kept singing.
I'll say will you marry me
I swear that I will mean it
I'll say will you marry me
I was about to sing this next verse for the last time so I dug into my pocket and pulled her present out. Her gaze was still fixated on my eyes so she hardly knew I had changed positions when I dug into my pocket. Then suddenly she realized that I was on my bended knee in front of her, she didn't say anything. Her eyes lit up with excitement and that really was all I needed so I continued to sing.
Rachel, I'll say will you marry me
I swear that I will mean it
I'll say will you marry me
I opened the box and her eyesight shifted lower to what I was holding in my hand. She looked at me and then she looked at what I was offering her.
I kept singing.
Ooh whoa ooh oh
Ooh whoa ooh oh
Ooh whoa ooh oh
105 is the number that comes to my head
When I think of all the years I wanna be with you
Wake up every morning with you in my bed
That's precisely what I plan to do...
When I finished the song, Becky stopped my iPod and they all clapped. They couldn't see what I was holding in front of Rachel.
"Rachel, before you answer me, I want to tell you that I love you so very, very much. Our relationship began with a song and I hope you know that if you say 'yes' our relationship will have many, many more songs to come. You are my whole world. I love you now and will cherish you until the day that I die. Rachel Barbra Berry, please be mine forever," I said and never took my gaze off of her.
~ Rachel ~
Santana's asking me to marry her…quick say something…C'mon brain…say 'Yes!'
"Yes!" I exclaimed.
I saw her smile brightly and remove my ring from the box. She slid it onto my shaking finger and looked up at me.
Not really believing that this was a real thing, I asked in a whisper, "San?"
"Yes, they know," she replied as she already knew what I would ask her.
I felt my eyes almost bug out of my head.
"My fathers know," I whispered to her.
"Yes, my dear, they do," she said, smiled, and winked at me.
"So…"
"So…" she said and smiled at me.
"We're getting married?"
"That's right baby," Santana said, "We're getting married!"
"You're what?" Quinn said as she brought us back to reality.
~ Quinn ~
Me and Britt were the closest ones to Santana and Rachel. They were whispering back and forth so I didn't hear the entire conversation.
What I did hear shocked the crap out of me.
"You're getting married," I asked again.
"Yes, Quinn, we are," Santana said as she raised Rachel's hand to show us the ring. It was beautiful and not too big. Big enough for Rachel's finger, but not too small.
"Holy shit," Becky yelled. We all looked at her and then we all started to laugh, including Becky. Then she whispered to Puck who smiled at the two.
"That's how I'm feelin', Little B!" Santana said and wiped her forehead in relief.
"That's awesome, San," Brittany said happily for us.
~ Rachel ~
I jolted up from the couch.
"Whoa! Where's the fire," Puck asked shocked.
"Um, fire? Oh…nowhere. Santana and I need to chat," I said and I hoisted her up with me.
"I guess we are going to talk," she said as I was lifting her up.
"Be right back," I yelled behind us as I pulled her up the stairs to our room. I slammed the door behind us.
~ Santana ~
I found this whole situation a little bit funny so I had a big smirk on my face. I folded my arms across my chest and leaned against the wall. I watched her demeanor and attitude. It was pretty funny to me.
"Ok, San, I brought you up here so we can figure this our privately," I she said and looked at me.
"Figure what out," I asked.
"Figure this out," she exclaimed and held up her ring.
I started to laugh.
"I'm so glad you find this amusing," she said exhaustedly.
I realized that I might be hurting her feelings or whatever so I immediately stopped.
"Ok, ok, I'm sorry, baby…You're right. Let's talk," I said and grabbed her hands and led her to the bed. We both sat down.
"I have so many questions…" she said and scratched her head.
"Shoot!"
"Ok, how long have you had this on your person," she asked.
"On 'my person'…" I asked and looked quizzically at her.
"How long have you had this," she reiterated, looked down at her ring, and sighed with a smile on her face.
"Since the morning after we undressed each other and said, 'I love you'," I said totally honestly.
"Really?"
"Yes, really," I answered.
"Oh, that's where you went when you weren't in your room…"
I nodded my head. "I made three stops that morning. One to your fathers'...one to the jewelry store...and the other to a florist for two flowers. I thought that if I didn't come home with something to give you that day, it'd look suspicious."
"My fathers…" she started to say.
"Your Daddy totally got what I wanted to do and was all for it. He had to tell your Dad who wasn't catching on real fast. I asked if I hinted to them of my plans, but I know they got the message crystal clear," I said.
"Wow…I never thought they'd go for it right now," she said.
"What? They love me!" I said sarcastically.
She got up from the bed, turned to face me, and smiled.
"So this isn't a promise ring," she asked as she looked down at it and admired it.
"Baby, we're beyond promise rings. This is da real deal yo," I imitated a rapper.
"Word?"
"Haha! Yes, word!" I said.
Then she ran at me and tackled me in a tight hug. We flew backwards onto the mattress and I squeezed her tightly.
"Are you happy," I asked timidly in the hug.
"Oh my God, Santana, yes, I am beyond happy," she said and kissed my cheek.
"I hope you don't think it's too early," I asked.
"Ok, it kinda is, but when we tell each other that we are forever, I kind of knew that it meant marriage or at least some kind of domestic partnership thingy! But in the future."
"I just figured, after that night, ya know, that I would never want to be with anyone else besides you," I said.
"Santana, while I love you for your certainty now. The one question I have is how can you be so sure that I'll be the one years from now?"
"Rachel, I love you. I'm willing to do anything I need to do in order for us to stay together. I do this without any hesitation at all. I do this because it's what my heart tells me to do. The first time I saw you, you captivated me. It's as simple as that. You allow me to do me and I appreciate that every single day. The day I leave you, my beautiful Rachel, is the day I die," I said boldly.
She cupped my face in her hands and kissed my lips sweetly and passionately. We kissed for a few minutes then I broke it to ask, "Are you sure that I'm the one?"
"Yes," she replied without any hesitation at all.
We sat up and I just looked at her.
"If I wasn't sure then I wouldn't have your ring on my finger," she said happily.
"Again it is not a promise ring, okay?" I said.
She nodded.
"But I think we might get arrested if we tried to get married now. We're not legal yet," I said sadly.
"The day that we are, you and I will be married," Rachel said and then kissed me.
"Oh, that's a good point," I said as the kiss broke.
She looked at me with a weird look on her face.
"Um, my Birthday comes first, so we'll get married on your Birthday?"
"My Birthday is June," she said.
"And mine's in April," I said.
"Wait. I have an idea," Rachel said with a smile.
"What's that?"
"You know I'd marry you tomorrow, if we could…"
I nodded my head up and down.
"Our Birthdays are coming up rather quickly and that leaves hardly any time to plan anything. So I propose…"
"I just did that!" I said and smiled.
"Haha! Yes, I know…Let me finish," she said as she pinched my side.
I jumped a little, but didn't say anything.
"Let's get married a year from now. Doesn't have to be that extravagant, just you, me, our families, and friends. We could do it at City Hall for all I care. Just so that I'm your wife and partner. That's all that matters."
I looked deeply into her eyes and I saw the truth. She wanted to marry me and I so wanted to marry her. I grabbed her face and pulled her to me. Inches apart, I smiled and pulled her the rest of the way. I kissed her. It almost felt like it was the first time. It was that good.
I broke the kiss after a few minutes to say, "I love you, Rachel Barbra Berry-Lopez!"
She looked me in the eyes and said, "I love you, Santana Lopez."
Before I went in for another kiss, I smiled at her. She smiled back.
Then we kissed.
Second Author's Note: I'm not sure when Santana and Rachel's actual Birthday months are so I made them up.
The songs in this chapter are "If Tomorrow Never Comes' by Ronan Keating and also "Marry Me" by Jason Derulo. Both are great songs.