Worth a Try

Neji steps out from behind a nearby clump of trees, but despite the fact that we both heard him laugh, his face is a mask of stoic indifference. Nothing fazes this guy. In other words, he isn't anything like me.

I'm a mess – sweating and nervous. I hope it's not going to be like this every time we tell someone or, as is usually the case, we slip up and someone finds out. I don't think I could take it.

"Oh no…" Sakura mumbles, her eyes darting back and forth between us, "I mean… sorry Neji."

Neji shrugs, looking unbothered, "I saw the two of you stop and I thought something might be wrong. I decided to check it out."

Well, clearly we've determined that there's nothing wrong, unless you count my being mortified half to death. First, Sakura corners me under the ridiculous pretense of giving medical advice and then Neji pops in, presumably just in time to see Sakura hand of tube of oil…of a personal nature.

"We should really get going," I say flatly, not looking at either one of them, "Um… was anyone around, Neji?"

"No. Can I ask you a personal question, Shikamaru?"

Ack. My worst nightmare. "I don't think you guys are taking this mission seriously." I don't think they're taking me very seriously either.

Neji looks at me skeptically, "We all know this mission is a joke. That snake has to be long gone by now."

I try to form some sort of argument, but I have to admit he's right. My shoulder sag and I let out an exaggerated sigh, "I know it's a joke but as team leader I have to–"

"Oh, this is all my fault," Sakura says miserably. I throw a glare her way. Yes it is.

"It's just one question," Neji insists, "It will only take a minute."

"Fine." If it were almost anyone other than Neji Hyuga, I probably would have told them to mind their own business, but he's not exactly an easy person to say "no" to. I think it's those big eyes of his or the way he never seems to blink. It's unnerving.

"What on earth could you possibly see," he smiles a little to himself, "in a hyperactive knucklehead like Naruto?"

The silence that greets these words is exceeding uncomfortable. I'm dumbfounded. It's not the first time someone's asked me that question or some variation, but I never would have thought Neji Hyuga would be the one asking it now.

"Let me get this straight," I say slowly, grappling with the very strange situation at hand, "Neither of you cares about the mission at all?" They both shake their heads. "Great. I actually miss Ino."

"Ha!" Sakura cuts in, waving her hand in front of her face dismissively, "Ino was how I found out in the first place. She tried to hold out but I wore her down. There's no way she could have ever kept a secret this big."

"It's not a big secret," I say quickly. The last thing I need is for this to get blown out of proportion. Oh and Ino? I'll deal with her later.

"Shikamaru?" Neji prompts. My eyes flash back to him. I think this is the most he's ever spoken to me in one go. "You don't have to answer if you don't want to. I'm just curious. Ever since Lee told me…"

I feel my mouth go very dry suddenly and I have to clear my throat before saying, "Lee?"

"Yes, Lee," Neji replies, nonplussed, "He told me you were kissing right in front of him."

Out of the corner of my eye I see Sakura press a hand to her mouth to stifle a giggle.

Neji takes a step toward me, his palms up as if signifying that he meant me no harm. What's that about? I shift back and forth nervously. It's not like I'm insane, I'm just… well maybe being with Naruto does make me a little crazy, but not in the ranting lunatic sort of way. Not yet.

"I was just wondering because you see…" Neji trails off and looks over at Sakura as if remembering her presence. "Sakura would you mind if I spoke to Shikamaru alone?"

"Not at all," she answers lightly. I can see she's relieved that Neji found out because of our carelessness as opposed to her own. "I'll go back to the village and get the antidotes. Tell you what – I'll even start searching the village and see if I can get a few other people to search with me. I don't think Naruto's busy."

"I don't know if he is or not," I tell her retreating back. When I look up, Neji's still got a tiny smile on his face.

"What?" I ask uncomfortably. Meanwhile, I'm trying to remember if I've ever been alone with the guy for more than five minutes.

"I'm arrogant," he says after a long thoughtful pause, "I have too much faith in my ability to see through people. Their motivations, their desires…" I feel a chill shoot up my arms making the hairs stand upright. "I don't want to corner you – in fact, I had no intention of ever asking but… I just can't seem to help myself. I'm sure you understand."

The entire time Neji is saying this, he's moving closer but I'm frozen where I stand. We started out at opposite ends of this small clearing, but now we're less than a foot away.

"I understand you to a point," Neji says softly. "Naruto's very handsome. Those blue eyes of his are certainly dreamy." The last word is dripping in sarcasm. I examine the tops of my shoes, not sure whether it's an insult or not. "You're handsome too, Shikamaru."

My eyes dart up to examine the expression on his face – to see if he's serious or not. But he looks the same as always. Impassive, as always.

"I've always been impressed by your maturity. The others from your grade? Kiba, Chouji and Naruto? They could never understand someone as intelligent as you."

"Hey they're my friends–"

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to offend, quite the opposite," Neji cuts across me, "I'd like to tell you something. I think you'll understand because you were recently in a similar position. Shikamaru…"

No. Don't tell me.

"I like you," Neji finishes quietly and seriously, "I just wanted you to know you have prospects other than…well, other prospects."

For some reason his fingers curl around my elbows, first one and then the other, and he pulls me closer. I don't understand. What's going on? What is happening? When I do nothing, Neji seems to take this as a sign of assent and brings his lips to mine in a gentle kiss.

I'm so surprised. I'm sure that's why I let him kiss me. After a few seconds he draws back mercifully, leaving me with the feeling of being suspended in midair. So this is what Naruto must have been going through when I told him.

This silence is worse. This silence is palpable.

"Neji," I croak as he leans forward, presumably to kiss me again.

"Shikamaru," he smiles again. This is a side of him I've never seen. His hand flies to the back of my neck and he's pulling me closer before I can react. "I've wanted to do this for a long time," Neji breathes, digging his fingers expertly into a tender spot above my collarbone, which makes me quiver. Oh man. This guy really knows his way around – No. Stop it.

As Neji brings his lips to mine once more, I finally regain the ability to speak. "Wait," I mutter, turning my head. At the last second, he draws back, looking at me confusedly. "I'm… well, I'm with Naruto. You know that."

He sighs, looking miffed now, "I thought as much."

"Then why did you kiss me?"

"Don't you get it, Shikamaru? I like you. I had to try."

"You're braver than me," I tell him, genuinely meaning it, "It took me years to build up to telling Naruto."

"Years?" Neji asks, looking astonished. Crap. Now I've gone and given something else personal away.

"Maybe not that long," I try to both sound and look indifferent as I take several belated steps back, from the guy. I hope it doesn't come off as rude, but then again, I'm not the one marching up to people and kissing them, especially when they're…involved with someone.

"Are you sure?"

I sigh, knowing what Neji is really asking. "Yeah," I force myself to make eye contact, "That's the way it is, I'm sorry."

"You and Naruto, huh?" Neji ponders this for a quiet minute, "I still don't see it."

I don't really know how to respond to that, so I change the subject, "I didn't know you were gay," I tell him. Despite the weirdness of Neji kissing me out of the blue, I feel a connection to him. Finally, here's someone my age that's also of the boy-and-boy mentality, besides Naruto. I can't stop myself from asking, "Do you know if anyone else in the village–"

"No," Neji shakes his head, "Not as far as I know, but then again, I wasn't sure about you."

"Yeah, I didn't know…" damn I already said that, "uh…yeah."

"Yes," Neji's expression has returned once more to the mask of impartiality I'm used to. "Well I guess we should be after this snake. Or should I call it a goose?"

I stare at him for several seconds and neither of us breaks the ponderous silence.

"Because it's a wild goose chase," Neji adds with a poker straight face.

"Got it"

In the end, we never do catch up with the snake, even when Naruto and Shino chip in and we scavenge everything within a ten-mile radius of the village. Our illustrious guest leaves in a huff and I'm left with yet another failed mission to my name.

And yet, as I lay in bed with Naruto later that night, I have a hard time worrying about my future success, or lack there of, as a ninja. The problems in my life, which are so much more personal to me, seem so much more pressing. I feel bad for not telling Naruto what happened, but I know it would only upset him. Or he would think it was hilarious. I'm really not sure which outcome is worse.

"Go to sleep," Naruto murmurs, pushing gently on my eyelids with the pads of his fingers.

"You first," but I can barely keep my eyes open. Despite the anxiety and the frustrating waste of an entire day, I feel very peaceful. "Unless you want to…"

"Oh, I want to," he replies heatedly, skimming his lips across my collarbone. When he reaches that spot, the spot Neji had attended to earlier, I shudder. "Third time's a charm," he whispers suggestively.

"Three times in one night," I whisper back, my voice awed, "Your stamina is out of this world."

At the end of the night, the record remains unbroken and Naruto and I fall asleep as we are, wrapped around each other in his single bed. I love him so much, more than anything or anyone in the world, but a thought occurs to me right as I'm falling asleep and I can't suppress it quickly enough.

That Neji Hyuga is one hell of a good kisser.