Second-to-last chapter guys! It's quite long, but there were a lot of loose ends to tie up and I didn't want to rush through anything. So here it is, last chapter before the epilogue. Now some of you may want to know a little more about how Nikki and Sadrian wind up. If that's the case, just PM me or leave a review and I'll get a one-shot or two-shot out to sketch that out in a little more detail.
Many thanks to A Marauder's Quill for your incredible review! It was one of the best I've ever gotten and it honestly made my entire week. I couldn't have cranked out this chapter so quickly without that review. :)
Enjoy!
Chapter 24
Nikki POV:
I've never been hungover, but if I had to guess, it's a walk in the park compared to the monstrous migraine I'm greeted with as soon as I crack open my eyes.
"Mother fudgesticks," I immediately groan. "Someone shut the blinds."
"I see your irritability is back in full force," a familiar voice replies.
I try squinting my eyes open again, and there's just enough shadow over my face now that I can make out a mop of curls.
"Glad you survived," I mumble. "I might not."
"Nikki, you should not joke about that," MopMan chastises. If I know him at all, he's crossing his arms and trying to look stern at the moment. And within the next fifteen seconds, that'll crack and he'll be trying to hide a smirk inside a scowl, and less than ten seconds after that, his lips will be twitching, and within a minute of the entire process, he'll be shaking his head and bending down to kiss me.
I'm right about the arm-crossing, but this time I don't see the jokester behind the stern eyes.
"Stop being so serious," I grumble. "There's been more than enough of that lately."
MopMan almost seems to struggle with this. Maybe this whole battle nonsense got to him more than I anticipated. Hell, maybe it got to me more than I anticipated.
Speaking of which, what on earth happened after I followed Laurah's rat of a husband away from the battle? I'm thinking MopMan might know, so I ask like any good and curious citizen.
"On a similar note, any idea what happened for the last half of the battle? I seem to have forgotten." The question starts sarcastic and dry, ends serious, and somehow finishes on dry again. It's confusing even for me, but by my reckoning it's better than the alternative, which just so happens to be admitting out loud that I'm a little shaken up by the whole thing.
"You do not have to put on this brave face, Nikki."
Great, now MopMan dearest is expecting me to be all serious. Damn it all, this is serious, isn't it? We just came out of a battle, of course it's serious. I'm no good with serious.
"Look, for now it helps me process," I mumble, more to the sheets than to my slightly worried boyfriend. "What happened?"
MopMan clears his throat, rubs the back of his neck like he always does when he's nervous about telling me something, and clears his throat again.
"Out with it man, I'm curious."
"When you followed Hallan, it seems the Green Witch put you under some sort of spell. Your task was to end King Caspian," MopMan finally explains, though he doesn't look at me as he forces the words out.
"What did I do?" I do my best to sound calm and put together, but good grief Cas is like my brother and I was supposed to kill him?!
"Nothing," MopMan reassures me, even taking my hand for extra comfort. "You did nothing to the king."
Alright, now I'm confused and I still don't know what on earth happened.
"So what happened then?" I am well aware that I sound very impatient, but come on, what am I supposed to sound like? A purring cat?
"Hallan was supposed to help you complete your task, but when you refused he…well, I do believe he could have taken it better."
Did MopMan see all this? Dear Aslan I hope not. I ask him as much, and unfortunately for my pride, he has to go and nod and admit that yes, he saw the tail end of my shenanigans. Fantastic.
"I tried to get to you Nikki," MopMan finishes, looking the most sorry I've seen him in the entire year or so I've known him.
"I'm not blaming you, silly. I wouldn't mind hacking the Green Witch into neat little cubes though. And maybe rolling the cubes in rice and seaweed, because sushi is pretty," I babble. "And I think we could use something pretty after that battle, because from what I remember it was a nasty business, you know?"
It occurs to me that maybe babbling is not the most effective way of dealing with the current situation. I also promptly ignore that perception and elect to continue to deal with this however I see fit.
Oh good gracious ghoul-drops, where is Laurah?!
"MopMan, where is my best friend?!" I shriek at once, clawing my way free of the sheet strewn over my lower half and bounding up from bed. "She had better be alright or so help me Aslan I will-"
"Nikki, you'd best sit down." MopMan sounds as serious as I've ever heard, and something about the heaviness in his tone makes me listen and do as he says.
My stomach drops into my shoes, right along with my heart. I know this is going to be bad news.
"Where's Laurah, Sadrian?" Aslan help me, I sound so small and sad right now. Well, in my defense, I'm currently preparing for my beau to inform me that my best friend for the past decade is dead, so I think I can be excused.
"She's alive," is the first thing he says, mercifully, and I let out the breath I was holding.
"But?" Here comes the bad news, I know it.
"She has not yet woken," he tells me quietly, almost like he's afraid of sending me into a tizzy just by speaking a pinch too loud. "We are not sure when she will."
"Didn't Cas bring along the cordial precisely for situations like this?" Not to point fingers or anything, but what, exactly, is the use of that fireflower thing if it can't fix whatever is wrong, hm?
Speaking of, where is Cas? I'll have to ask about him after I get the full and awful scoop on Laurah.
"She was given the cordial as soon as she was found."
MopMan puts a hand on my shoulder to steady me, and it's only then that I realize I am, in point of fact, trembling and on the verge of some rather embarrassing tears.
"And she's still asleep? And we don't know if she'll wake up?"
There goes the first round of tears, dripping fast down my cheeks and off the tip of my chin. MopMan wipes them away with his thumb, but I can't quite joke about the gooey gesture like I normally would.
"I'm gonna go see the chica." I've decided that if my best friend might not wake up, then by heaven I will visit her day and night and tell her she has to, and maybe she'll hear me and she'll listen. I mean, this is Narnia, magic happens right?
It's only when I've gotten to my feet that I notice I haven't asked MopMan how he is. How heartless of me, especially when we're dating. This really is getting to me.
"I'm sorry, I'm being an idiot. Are you okay?" I have to stop marching away from the bed to be fully sincere, but the moment I do MopMan shoos me back on my way.
"I'm quite alright. Go to your friend, Nikki. I know you're worried sick," he says, and even tugs me along by my wrist when I hesitate. He's a keeper, this one.
"Are you sure?" We're walking rather briskly toward my comatose friend, as least I assume we are, but I have to make sure. I don't like feeling as though I've been heartless.
MopMan stops abruptly and puts his hands on my shoulders.
"Nikki, I know you. If you do not see Laurah now, you will spend every moment from now until nightfall worrying yourself sick. We're going to see her, and we're going now," he tells me firmly.
Having so schooled me, he goes back to tugging me along. This quickly ends, however, because he's right and I'm already worried half to madness and the faster I walk the faster I can see just how badly off that chica is. I knew she shouldn't have come here on her own!
I can grouse at Aslan later, because now we've finished weaving through the halls and we're at Laurah's door. Hey, I didn't even notice I was in the palace until just now. Talk about tunnel vision, and wow they put me in the palace? Sweet.
This is, maybe, perhaps, mayhap, my way of distracting myself from the very real fact that my best friend is lying as white as death on her bed and how on earth am I supposed to react to that, I ask you?
Well, my eyes are tearing up, so seeing exactly how Laurah looks is not exactly an option at the moment. I bat the pesky tears away and walk into the room as steadily as I can, barely remembering to thank MopMan for holding the door.
Walking up to the bed is a strange experience; it doesn't feel quite real, but of course it is. Heaven knows I wish it wasn't, but this time wishing won't change anything will it?
"Chica, I swear, you better wake up sometime soon or I will not be pleased," I choke out as the front of my knees bump the bed. "I followed you here, dammit, and you're not allowed to go places I can't follow you to."
Some wild and crazy part of me (so a large part) is hoping that Laurah will spring to life at these words and we can talk and catch up and goof off just like old times. I'm needlessly disappointed when that doesn't happen. It's just that the chica has always listened to me before.
"Would you like some time alone?" MopMan's now come up beside me and taken my hand.
"Don't you dare," I mumble. "I need a shoulder to cry on, and you happen to be the most sensible candidate."
He doesn't say anything, but I'm getting the distinct feeling he's smiling at me behind my back. Any other time, I might berate him only to kiss him moments later, but now, little as I want to admit it, things are a bit too serious for that kind of playfulness. It's easier to admit when I look at my best friend, but good god it hurts.
"Is she supposed to be that…ghastly?" I need a thesaurus; I couldn't think of another word, and ghastly is a simply awful way of describing Laurah. She's more just…sleeping, it's just that her breathing is really shallow and she looks more like she's dying than sleeping.
"When she wakes, I do hope you tell her she looked ghastly." MopMan's joke falls flat, but the when almost makes it better. Almost.
"Too early for that," I answer. It comes out rather gloomy, the polar opposite of how I usually speak. This whole situation is sobering, I guess.
I don't notice that I'm trembling until I sit down on the bed next to Laurah and see my hand shaking as it reaches for hers. The strangest thing is that I don't see any wounds on her; the cordial must have fixed that. So it's so easy to pretend that she's only playing and she'll get up and give me a hug and tell me she's glad I'm okay after that blasted battle.
I couldn't guess how long I sit there staring at her, but I do know it's a long time and I spend the entirety of it trying not to cry and failing miserably. MopMan kindly lends me the use of his shoulder for my bawling, and he even strokes my hair as I sob. It's comforting, a little.
Once I've exhausted the tear factories in my eyes, I remember Caspian once again and tell MopMan I'd better check on him too. I let out a great whooshing sigh of relief when I confirm that yes, Caspian is conscious and I won't have to cry over another nearly lifeless body.
This perks my spirits up enough that I can march right into Cas's room with a beaming smile.
"Look at you, all survived and everything!" I chirp at my adopted brother sitting on that comfy looking armchair near the window.
Cas turns around and smiles, but at once I see the worry lines in his brow. He's been crying too – his eyes are red around the edges.
"I see you have recovered well," he says, still with that sad, sad smile that sucks my chipper attitude right out of me. He's upset over the same thing as me. Well, same person to be more exact.
"You too. By the way, sorry I tried to kill you," I apologize, hoping to steer the conversation away from the topic that will have us both leaking salt drops from our eyes.
"And I too must apologize," Cas says, "for knocking you on the head. I'm afraid it left rather a large bruise."
"I'm just happy you didn't skewer me."
This feels all well and good, but I can also tell his heart really isn't in it, especially when he sees MopMan put a hand on my back. He gets a pained look in his eye, though he's quite good at steeling his face against it.
"I assume you've been in to see her," I find myself blurting out for no obvious reason at all. MopMan's hand steadies me when I sway just at the sound of my own stupidity.
"I have." Well, Caspian is quite taciturn when he's upset, isn't he?
"Don't you worry, she'll be better in no time. If she survived Dark Island, she can get through this." Gosh, I sound so much more confidant than I feel.
Cas doesn't look so sure, but he seems to put on a brave face. I fully suspect this is for my sake. I almost say something to that effect, in fact. But I don't quite have that in me, not when waiting and hoping for Laurah to wake up has taken so many licks out of me.
"I will have to return to Cair Paravel soon," Caspian says somberly.
Instantly, I get what he's trying to say. He can't stay here, and he's kind of hoping I will so we'll know Laurah's condition as it progresses.
"I'm gonna stay here," I supply. "And I'll let you know if anything happens." God, now that sounded depressing; it sounded like I'm waiting for her to die and I'll let Caspian know when she's about to. I so could have said that one better.
Cas, however, doesn't seem to pick up on this; instead, he just nods and goes back to staring out the window. He looks…hopeless. Worse than when Laurah took off into the woods when the Dawn Treader made port.
"Do you mind if I ask what happened?" So help me, but I'm curious and I'm getting the distinct feeling that there's a lot I don't know.
Caspian doesn't reply at first, but his shoulders slump. Great, so what I don't know is nothing but bad news. Fantastic.
"It is not an easy tale to hear, Nikki," he finally says. "You may want to sit down."
I turn around to do just that, but MopMan has already started tugging a small sofa over to me. Naturally, I plop down gratefully and try to pretend I'm not as worried as I am.
Caspian begins, still gazing steadily at the outside world, "After you were not quite yourself, it was not too horribly long before the sprites joined the fight. Laurah was leading them."
He pauses, takes a deep breath. I make a mental note to thank him for telling me the story later, because it's painfully obvious how much of a toll this is taking on him.
"The tide of the battle turned with their arrival; it was still an awful affair, but we had hope. That was when the snake appeared."
Caspian pauses again, and shudders almost imperceptibly.
"I barely noticed it was there before it attacked. Of that, I remember only its tail piercing my chest and the dizzying feeling of being high in the air. When I woke, Queen Lucy's cordial had healed all my wounds, but Laurah was nowhere to be found. I asked after her, that was when I found out what had really happened."
Caspian's voice is shaking now, even though I know he's trying quite hard to hide it. My eyes are filling up, because I have this sickening feeling that I know precisely what happened.
"Laurah had leaped to defend me from the snake. And now it may have cost her life."
Now his mood makes more sense; not only is Cas here dealing with some serious grief and anxiety, now he's got a nice package of guilt to put the cherry on top, so to speak.
"Don't you go thinking this is your fault, you hear? Laurah, stubborn thing that she is, would have jumped between the two of you regardless. No long faces over that, mmkay?" I sound much more chipper than I feel, but I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that it's best if I sound more like the old me.
To punctuate this mini lecture, I waltz over to Cas, pull his head out of his hands, and give him a good shaking by the shoulders.
"She is going to get through this, she is going to live, and you two are probably going to have one of the sweetest, most nauseating kisses in the history of Narnia when that does happen," I tell him in no uncertain terms, using the occasional shake to make sure my words are sinking in.
Heaven help me, he still looks mostly hopeless. Mostly is better than completely, but it's not nearly what I was going for. Well, considering the circumstances, that may be the best I can hope for until Laurah wakes up. Because she will, if for no other reason than that I'm not giving her a choice. I will yell and cry and spout sarcasm at her until my face turns blue if that's what it takes.
Aslan rest the ears of anyone in the vicinity if it comes to that, but a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.
"Now, why don't we visit her later, yes?"
When Caspian leaves a day or so later, it's with one of the gloomiest faces I've yet seen on him. Just the sight of it is enough to make me want to curl up in a ball and have myself a good, long cry. I would too, except I have yet to give Laurah her get-better-soon-or-else speech for the day and I wouldn't want her to miss it.
"Take care of her, Nikki," Cas says as he mounts up and prepares to ride back to Cair Paravel with his remaining army.
"Always do, always will," I answer with a cheery wave that isn't so happy as I'd like it to be.
Then Cas rides off and I'm left on my own with MopMan to try and jolt my best friend out of her days-long coma. It's much easier said than done.
Days go by slowly after that, and it gets harder and harder to keep up my chirpy façade. But if I lose hope, that's when it will really suck, so I have to do my best to keep my spirits up. MopMan helps the most with that.
Eventually, I have to acknowledge my worst fear: Laurah might never wake up.
Laurah POV:
I wake from what feels like a long and much-needed sleep that lasted a lifetime in a world that is both real and unreal at the same time.
Aslan stands to my left, and two doors stand at my front. There is grass so green it hurts the eyes to look at for too long beneath my feet, there is a sky so blue it seems almost painted on, and there is a quiet and peaceful silence that wraps over the entire scene.
"Aslan?" I whisper in disbelief. It's been so long since I've seen the Great Lion. Has he grown?
"Laurah, dear child," he says in his warm Lion's voice. "Well done, very well done indeed. You have freed your people and saved King Caspian."
"He's alright? When I last saw him…" I trail off and dip my head to try and hide the tears welling up. I remember how he looked when last I saw him…pale, cold, bleeding.
"All is put right in this world, Daughter of the Wood," Aslan tells me with a smile perking up his whiskers. "And I believe the Green Witch had something of yours."
At this, the Great Lion looks down and I see a small vial I didn't notice before. Somehow, I have the feeling this vial is what I've been searching for off and on ever since Dark Island.
"Are those…?" Again, I can't quite finish my sentence, but Aslan smiles in affirmation anyway.
"Yes, those are the memories the Witch stole from you. I think it is time you had them back."
With that, Aslan lets loose an almighty roar that takes me by surprise. And when I look down, the vial is gone and a great rush of warmth engulfs me, filled with shimmering images that I had long ago forgotten. Happy memories from my childhood from when I was too young to remember, memories of my first visit to Narnia and the War of Deliverance that I was a part of. But most of all, the images are of Caspian. Caspian laughing, Caspian dancing, Caspian holding my hand. A thousand happy times, long forgotten and at last returned.
At long last, I remember. I remember everything.
"How did you find them?" I whisper, so shocked from the return of the memories that I can't speak at my normal volume. The sheer quantity of them is dizzying and wonderful and breathtaking and nearly unfathomable.
"When you killed the Witch in her serpent's form, all her spells were broken. Her army was freed from its enchantments, her work in the forests was undone, and the things she had stolen were returned by my will."
"You mean it's all over?" I can hardly believe this, even as tears of joy and relief prick at my eyes. After so long, after months and months and even more than a year, it's all finally over.
At Aslan's nod, I let a cry of happiness escape my lips and hurl myself at the Lion in a wild hug, the sort of hug that happens when someone has just given you the most wonderful news in the world, and the only response is to wrap your arms around them as tight as possible and thank them over and over again until you run out of the breath to do so. Aslan chuckles at my antics, but he lets me squeeze him and murmur my thanks into his mane until my breath, indeed, runs out.
When I've finished, Aslan speaks again.
"And now, you must make a choice," the Lion rumbles, lifting his head to look at the two doors I noticed earlier, forgot about, and only now have noticed again.
"Where do they go, Aslan?"
The doors look almost identical, but for a faint smell of lilies wafting from one, and a slight greenish tint to the other.
"One leads to my Country, and the other will return you to Narnia." Aslan sounds almost…sad. Is there something I'm missing?
"Am I dead?" I blurt out without being entirely sure how I feel about it. If Caspian is alright, maybe it's not so bad. The sprites can join all of Narnia.
"No, not yet. But if you continue on into my Country, you will die in Narnia."
At first, I think my choice is easy. Why wouldn't I go back to Narnia, to Caspian and to Nikki, if I could? How happy they'll be when I tell them I remember everything, every whisper and fight and loving gesture between Caspian and I, every spar and teasing session with Jaystorm: everything! I know Nikki will shriek and dance around, and Jaystorm will ruffle my hair and tell me he missed me too much, and Caspian will…well, I'm not as sure about Caspian. He may spin me round until I'm too dizzy to stand, or he may wrap me in a tight hug and never let go, except to kiss me. He never was completely predictable.
But Aslan's Country is calling to me as much as my friends. Somehow, without Aslan telling me, I think I know Anne is in there. Anne, the sprites who died in the war, the Narnians; old friends and new alike are sure to greet me if I choose that path. I want to see my sister again. I don't want to have to have said goodbye.
"I don't know where I should go, Aslan. Can't you help me decide?"
Aslan shakes his head. "You must make this choice, as you made the choice to stay in Narnia those years ago."
I look back and forth between the two doors, surprisingly torn and completely indecisive. I want my sister…but I want Caspian and Nikki too. And I cannot have all of them.
"Anne," I whisper as I touch the door to Aslan's Country. It's warm and cool at the same time, and oh so inviting. I could never be unhappy in Aslan's Country.
But Nikki…she would be devastated if I choose not to return to Narnia, as would Caspian. Yet I can't quite make my choice.
I look to Aslan, tears filling my eyes at what I now have to do. In many ways, this is a choice between my family and my dear friends. It's beautiful and devastating.
I lay my hand on the door I've chosen, take a deep breath, and open it in a flood of light.
Nikki POV:
One of those miserable days when I'm sitting in Laurah's room with a book and a sour attitude, I hear the sheets rustle just the tiniest bit. Now, my first thought is that MopMan is pranking me in an ill-fated attempt to cheer me up. Then I remember that he's sworn off those pranks until Laurah wakes up because I told him that would make me feel better. My next thought is that she died and her ghost is coming over to scare the skittles out of me.
When I whip around, no doubt as white as her sheets, I'm greeted with neither of those things. I see something else entirely, something I'd almost given up hope on seeing.
Laurah's stirring. She's waking up.
And then, as any sensible person would undoubtedly do in this situation, I freeze in my seat and stare at the formerly unmoving, deathly-colored body of my friend. That's normal, right?
Only when she actually blinks – blinks! – do I realize that no, I'm not hallucinating and no, I'm not crazy. She really is..she's waking…she's…alive!
In an instant, I bound over and sob into her shoulder.
"Oh my god you're alive! You'd best have a really damn good reason for scaring me like that, chica!" At this point, I'm not entirely sure what I'm hollering at her, but I do know I'm crying and I'm happy and she's alive.
"Return me to the dead, why don't you?" she wheezes.
"Oh gosh, I'm sorry, okay, I'll ease up, are you okay?"
Okay maybe I shouldn't have practically choked her, but come on, the chica is back from the dead! She should have known to expect a stranglehold hug upon her return to the land of the living.
All this chitter chatter is just making me even more hyper, kind of like a hyena on Red Bull. Speaking of, I never tried that specific energy drink, did I?
"I'm fine, Nikki. I'm fine," Laurah repeats, smiling but not quite as happy as I'd like. What's up now?
"Chica, you just woke up from the dead and something's wrong. Spill."
There shall be nothing but happiness from here on out, I have decreed!
"I thought you'd have heard by now," the chica whispers, teary-eyed and runny-nosed.
"Heard about what? I've holed up in here with you, silly," I twitter, trying to keep up my burst of joviality. I spent the last days, almost two weeks actually, in here as depressed as you please; of course I want to stay happy.
"Anne," is all she says, and then the light bulb goes off. Oh. Oh sheets on sticks.
"O-oh," I stammer out. Cripes, I'm such an idiot. Of course she's sad, we did just come out of an all-fired battle!
We sit in awkward silence then, me feeling very sorry and very stupid and Laurah no doubt feeling straight-up sad. I really am a genius, and I repeat these berating words to myself until Laurah looks up with a timid smile.
"Let's talk of happier things, alright? We've been sad for far too long."
"You got that right," I mumble as I take my grouchy face and tuck it away for use later, perhaps the next time MopMan gets testy with me. "What happier things, pray tell?"
"For one, I remember."
Wait.
As in…
Oh my god.
I remain seated and gaping with an open mouth and a frozen face until Laurah's laugh breaks my trance. Did she just say…that is, she…actually…YES!
From here, I let out an almighty shriek to wipe away all other shrieks ever shrieked on this earth and yank her out of bed for a happy dance.
"ASLAN WE LOVE YOU!" I shout to the heavens as I fling both my arms and Laurah's too. Because if it wasn't Aslan who did that, then who could, I ask you?
"I thought you would react like this," Laurah grins, and I'm so so much happier when she actually joins in with my dance, though I suspect it's only to humor me so I'll calm down sometime before the next millennium.
Caspian is going to do cartwheels, I swear to the stars.
"WHAT are we doing?!" I squeal. "You need to get to Cassy-boy, PRONTO!" And by pronto, I mean immediately, ASAP, at once, with no further delay! All those hurry it up kinds of things, and all of them at once. Wait, should I send him the news? No, let them have a rom-com moment of cuteness!
Laurah perks up visibly at this and I take special note of the wave of immense relief that I can see washing over her face.
"Caspian's alright?" she whispers, hoarse and teary again. "I thought…I wasn't sure…"
At once, I remember Caspian's tale of what happened, and I understand a little better. Well, through my haze of hyper at least.
"He's fine, chica," I answer, much more calmly than my previous expressions and statements since she came to. "He'll be a thousand different kinds of relieved to see you alright again, that's for sure."
Laurah smiles a smile that I personally think looks a bit sad beneath all the happy, but we'll take care of that straight away. To Cair Paravel we go!
Just as I've proclaimed this rather loudly (seriously, the entire palace heard, I'd bet money on it), Laurah pulls up short from skipping around with me.
"Wait, I have to set things right here. Mother…well, she's been dethroned you could say, and Anne…"
"We can be sad later, chica," I tell her firmly. "We just won a war, let's celebrate. Hurry up and take care of ruler-y stuff here and we'll set off for Cair the very second you're finished. In other words, you'd best finish early in the morning rather than late at night, because so help me I really do mean the instant you're through."
"Alright, Nikki," she says mildly. I will say, however, that she dances and skips around with me some more before settling down for her serious business.
Laurah's royal beez-ness ends up taking a few days, mostly of organizing surviving members of the council and getting ready to take her place as their queen. Actually, Laurah says something about merging the sprites with the rest of Narnia and Aslan being a huge help in convincing the rest of the council, but I barely pay attention. Hey, I'm antsy to get to the Cair after this most wondrous development.
Well, on the bright side I have plenty of time to hang with MopMan. That too ends up being bittersweet though, since I still can't quite decide where I stand on the whole stay-in-Narnia-or-go-home thing. We talk over that a few times, but I never can quite come to a decision. He tells me to take my time, but my main problemo is that I don't know how much time I – we – have left.
"Nikki, you worry over this too much," MopMan tells me one day when Laurah's in a council meeting and I'm rehashing the same issue.
"You'll thank me later when it turns out I do have to go back," I retort sourly. I'm doing my best to be all patient and whatnot with him, but it's harder to be affectionate and gooey when I know I might have to say goodbye to him rather soon. It's not a fun time, nor a fun thought.
MopMan suddenly straightens and gets a curious little gleam in his eye.
"What?" I ask. I do my best to not sound cross, but it doesn't turn out as nicely as I wanted.
"You have talked exhaustively of your return to your home and leaving me, but Nikki, what if you did not have to leave me at all?"
"Do you happen to have a cloning device?" I retort with a smirk and a roll of my eyes. How else am I supposed to be in two places at once, I ask you? I just so happen to not have magic like that.
"I do not know what that is, but here is my idea anyway," MopMan pauses for a moment with that triumphant look on his face, though I can tell he's gauging my reaction carefully too. "I could go to your home with you."
Well.
What?
I think I sit there gaping like a fish out of water, but I'm so stunned that I'm not positive what, exactly, I'm doing. Leave his home? For…my home?
Absolutely not!
"Are you crazy? MopMan, your family is here you dolt! Your family and your job and literally your whole life! I will not have you give all that up for me," I push out in one single breath. By the end of my very vivid denial, my head swims from the lack of oxygen, but that in no way lessens my vehement no.
"And your family is at your home, in Earth I believe you called it. How is you staying here with me different than me leaving with you?"
Why is he so pleased with this idea?! He can't leave everything, literally everything mind you, behind just for me; I won't have it!
"Because my world is very, very different from this one, Sadrian!" In my frenzy, I barely notice that I'm calling him by his given name and not the one I unceremoniously dubbed him with. "It's rougher and meaner and hard and nothing like Narnia. It would crush you," I finish, still opposed to the idea but now it's starting to sink in exactly what the proposition means.
This guy I've only known a little over a year is willing to leave everything he's ever known for me.
Holy cheese sticks.
"I don't care, Nikki," this very guy murmurs, eyes looking into mine as steadily as anything. "I think the adventure would be rather entertaining, as long as you are there."
No I'm not crying, I just have something in my eye. And in my nose. Man, allergies must be awful this time of year.
"And anyway, I admit I am rather curious of the strange items you spew about from time to time. For example, I would very much like to see what, precisely, a 'car' is, and why it can get you a hundred miles in mere hours."
He looks...excited. Sadrian looks and sounds excited about this, as if there's nothing else in the world he would rather do than leave Narnia with me.
"You can't be serious," I mumble against the lump in my throat.
Alright, I admit it, I'm crying. I'm crying and he's wonderful and I can't believe this and he's crazy and I love him.
My MopMan scoots closer and wipes away my blasted tears with gentle hands that only make me cry that much harder.
"Y-you have to s-stop being so damn w-w-wonderful," I hiccup at him. Before I even know it, I'm sniffling into his shoulder and grumbling something about not wanting to get snot and tears on his nice shirt.
"How many times must I tell you, Nikki; I do not care about my shirt."
Is he laughing at me?
No, but he's grinning. I can feel the telltale quirk of his lips against my ear.
"When we see Aslan again, I will ask him to allow me to leave with you. I think he would not refuse us," MopMan murmurs against my hair.
"Refuse you, genius. This was all your idea, remember." His own wonderful, heartbreakingly beautiful idea.
"Are you sure?" I ask, having had my sufficient time to warm up to the idea. "Your family-"
"I was away from my family for well over a year on the Dawn Treader. I love them dearly, but I would rather explore Earth with you than watch you leave Narnia and know I may never see you again."
"You're making me cry again, dammit," I grouse, and sure enough a few more tears sprinkle his shirt. It really is a nice shirt: all soft linen and light blue that goes so well with his hair. Hope he didn't like the shirt too terribly much; I'm ruining it.
I think I just might believe him, that he doesn't care about the shirt.
We stay like that for a little while, but most of my thoughts are revolving around how perfect he is and how much easier it is to not have to choose between my home and him.
Laurah POV:
"Ready?" I ask Nikki and Sadrian once I've mounted up on Asha. I'm anxious to get going, but I'm also putting it off. I wanted to send the news that I woke up to Caspian as soon as I thought of it, but Nikki insisted that we wait so I could surprise him in person at Cair Paravel.
"Lead the way, chica," Nikki chitters back. She's been in a world of her own with Sadrian ever since yesterday. I don't know exactly what happened, but whatever it was it's turned her completely mushy. I've never seen her like that with anyone, and it's equal parts disgusting and indescribably adorable.
"Let's go see the king, Asha," I whisper as I give my horse a gentle nudge with my heels and wave goodbye to Rhoslyn. She's kindly agreed to look after things here while I go to Caspian.
We start off into the forest at a steady walk, but very quickly I get antsy and speed our pace to a trot. After a little while, I can't stand going even that slow, and I talk Nikki into cantering through the woods with me. She shrieks at first, but Sadrian steadies her and I smile behind the hood of my cloak.
Our first day of travels passes much too slowly for my taste, and the night is almost unbearable. The more time passes, the more impatient I become to see Caspian and tell him he has no need to worry for my life any more. And moreover…well, I'd be lying if I didn't admit that I wanted to see him alive and healthy with my own eyes. The last time I saw him, he was within an inch of death thanks to the snake.
I almost speak to Nikki about my concern, because I know she spoke to Caspian before his duties called him back to his throne at Cair Paravel, but she's very much wrapped up in Sadrian and I'd feel terribly awkward interrupting. I don't want to put even the smallest dent in the happiness she's found with Sadrian when she's done so much for me.
And so the first night of our travels passes with agonizing sluggishness on my part. At first light the next day, I rouse Nikki with claps and shouts to get up because Caspian is waiting, but it's Sadrian who finally coaxes her from her blanket cocoon. She's cranky for breakfast, naturally, but nowhere near as much as usual.
Our second day of traveling is quite similar to the first, but this time I push us a little faster. We'll get to Cair Paravel by midday tomorrow, at this pace.
By nightfall, I know we're even closer than that. I'd ride through the night were I making the journey on my own, but I'm not and I have no interest in facing Nikki's wrath if she loses an entire night's sleep, so I sit in silence for the second night to wait until morning.
At last, the third morning comes and I hurry us back on our way before the sun's even finished rising, in spite of Nikki's spirited grumblings that I must hate her or want to make her life miserable. She alternates between the two for the first hour of the last day of this journey.
When we finally break out of the woods and Cair Paravel looms majestically in the distance, I can't contain myself any longer; I urge Asha into a full gallop and ignore Nikki's shouts to wait.
"I'll see you inside the castle, Nikki!" I shout over my shoulder, barely wondering if she hears or understands my words. I've waited too long to see him as it is; I'm not waiting another minute more than I absolutely must.
Asha and I thunder through the streets and over the bridge to the Cair, stopping only when we've arrived at the gates and I'm explaining breathlessly to the two centaur guards who I am and what I'm doing here. Well, I start to at least; the moment I tell them I'm Laurah, they step aside and let me pass with grins on their faces.
"Jaystorm sends his regards!" one of them calls after me as I sprint toward the castle doors at a full run.
"Tell him I send them right back and to meet me on the grounds tomorrow for a good spar!" I holler back, not stopping as I do.
Glenstorm is at the doors, and he lets me in with a rare smile cracking his serious face.
"King Caspian is in the throne room," he says. I thank him and continue my swift pace.
I run through the castle without knowing entirely which way the throne room is, but I guess as best I can from the restoration plans that Caspian showed me back when his reign was young and we were engaged.
All at once, I find the double doors to the throne room and I'm suddenly not at all sure of myself. I know how I feel and I know how he feels too, but is barging into the throne room the best of ideas?
And I find myself staring at the doors without moving, breathing heavily from my rush here. And now that I am here, I don't know what to do.
Nikki would tell me to just go inside already. Anne would smile and give me a tiny push.
With these two images in mind and eyes that water at the memory of my sister, the sister I decided to wait to see until I go to Aslan's Country myself, I put my hand on the doors, take a deep steadying breath, and push them open.
Caspian POV:
He's heard nothing for two weeks, almost three. Caspian wants to believe that Laurah will, indeed, wake up as Nikki assured him, but he's afraid that she won't and he'll have to face living without the hope of her return, without even the smallest hope. He's nowhere near ready for that, not when he's just gotten her back.
If only he could have some assurance that she would come back to him, he would be able to handle the waiting. But waiting, never knowing, fearing receiving news and hearing what he is not ready to hear is draining him ever so much, and keeping up with his royal duties, tripled due to the recent turmoil, is becoming almost impossible.
At this point, he does not care if she ever remembers their past, so long as he can have a future with her.
Caspian's gloomy thoughts are interrupted at the sound of the doors creaking open. He barely looks up, but when a familiar voice calls to him his head snaps up in disbelief.
No, that's not right. It must be his imagination, because Nikki would have sent him news if Laurah's condition had changed.
An awful, awful thought occurs to him then; perhaps the news was coming – news of her death, and this was her ghost come to haunt him or say goodbye.
But could a ghost open the doors? Could a ghost call to him so gently, so carefully as if she was afraid of hurting him? Could a ghost walk so steadily toward him, sure and yet timid in the same stroke?
But in spite of all his reasonings, Caspian isn't quite sure it's her, even though he wants it to be, wants so badly for his vision to be true that he thinks he would give his right arm for it to be so.
He stands as if in a trance and steps down to meet her, still not trusting his eyes or his ears to tell him the truth. She stops in front of him, and he can smell the sun in her hair.
"Laurah?" he whispers.
She smiles, and he knows.
Laurah POV:
Caspian is having trouble believing it's me; I see it in how he looks at me – with long glances and unsure eyes and a confused quirk in his eyebrows. I see it in how he walks to me – unsteadily, as if the ground is swaying beneath his feet. Even how he says my name speaks to his incredulity: how softly he whispers my name, how frightened he looks as he says it, like if he speaks too loudly I'll float away like a wisp in the wind.
"It's me, Caspian," I murmur as I stretch out my hands toward his. "I'm here. I'm alright."
His hands shake as he takes that last step to come within arm's reach. When at last his hands take my own, they're cold and as unsteady as his legs were moments ago.
"I'm not going anywhere," I whisper, drawing as close to him as I dare while I'm still so unsure of what to do.
This seems to jerk him from his trance and straight into reality. His eyes brighten, his grip strengthens, and he stands tall and proud once more.
"Laurah?" he asks again, this time clearly and with a note of rising hope in his voice.
I can only nod as I see the joy blooming on his face and the smile spreading in not only his mouth, but his eyes as well. All of him smiles, and I know it's just for me.
All at once, he swoops his arms around me, picks me up quicker than I can even think to object, and spins me round and round until I'm dizzy with delight and laughing in relief. The same breath he lowers me to the ground on wobbly feet, his mouth locks onto mine and he kisses me until I'm breathless and red-cheeked.
"Caspian-" I try to say in between his attentions, but I barely finish his name before it's whisked away in another dizzying kiss, and another, and another, until I lose all sense of time and there's only the two of us and passionate lips and grasping hands and embraces that never seem to be tight enough.
"I love you," Caspian whispers, abruptly ceasing our rather pleasant activity so he can look me in the eye. "I love you," he says again, and any other time I'd poke fun that he said the same thing twice. But now I only smile and tell him the same.
"And I love you." He lowers his head to kiss me again, and kiss me he does.
At length, Caspian pulls away as my head spins and I fight to remain upright on my own. I steady myself against his chest, which turns out to be a rather good idea when he utters his next words.
"Marry me," he murmurs against my lips.
"If I remember correctly, you got on one knee last time," I say with a smile.
He pulls back with confusion running light lines along his brow.
"Last time?" he asks, not quite knowing what I mean. Then understanding dawns across his face and, if possible, he looks even happier than before. "You remember."
I nod and let a happy tear leak from my eye.
"I remember everything." Any words I might have said after that are drowned in yet another kiss that weakens my knees.
"I think it may be time you had that ring back."
Whew, long wasn't it? But the epilogue is still to come. I've actually finished writing that, I just have to edit it. I'll have that out for you in a week, maximum.
Review!