I don't own anything associated with Kingdom Hearts or Silent Hill. They belong to Square Enix/Disney and Konami respectively.

Anyways, here's the look into Vanitas' head that I promised last chapter. For the most part, these are flashbacks to before the story, but the first and last scene take place within this story's timeline. Hopefully, these will give you some insight into why Vanitas is the way he is.

Chapter 25

Now the pieces were falling into place.

Vanitas floated above his Station of Awakening, eyes closed peacefully. After so many long days of planning and pain, it was coming to an end. He would be one with Ventus again, complete, and Aqua and Terra would be his.

He opened his eyes to see Ventus staring up at him. His lighter half still didn't understand what was going on. It irked him how Ventus could be so ignorant while Vanitas knew everything. But it didn't matter. Soon, Ventus would know nothing, would be nothing.

Ventus was in a fighting stance, and Vanitas smirked. Didn't Ventus get it? He was in Vanitas' domain now, and had no power here. With a snap of his fingers, the darkness answered his thoughts and launched at Ventus, wrapping around his arms and anchoring them to the ground. The apprentice pulled against his bonds, glaring.

Vanitas laughed and lowered himself to the ground, walking over to Ventus. He passed Aqua along the way, and stopped to appraise his work. Her mind was still there – he never had any intention of erasing it – but for all intents and purposes, she was no different than the monsters. That would be fixed once he became one with Ventus. He would release enough of her mind that she could function independently, but he would use connective magic, the same one Aqua had initiated with her Wayfinders, to bind Terra and her to himself.

And he would never be alone again.

He could hear Ventus snarl as he continued to stare at Aqua. He paid the irate boy little mind; Ventus had already taken so much from him, he didn't deserve any sympathy. Upon hearing his distress though, he could feel Aqua fighting again, straining like a dog fighting to get free from her leash. With a thought, he drowned her mind in darkness, holding her under until she stopped squirming.

He smiled at their naivety. Aqua and Ventus barely understood what was going on. Terra had a better idea, being more in tune with the darkness, but he didn't understand either. How could he? Aqua and Terra, they were children compared to him. They only had a few years, through which they had been coddled by their Master. Vanitas was younger still, but through his powers and the powers of this town, he had the memories of hundreds of years. He could see into the hearts of any that crossed into Silent Hill, breathe life into the darkest of memories. He was the shepherd at the head of his flock, delivering the sheep to the butcher as he deemed fit.

So, it didn't bother him that Aqua and Terra were against his plans. Children didn't know what was best for them.

He approached Ventus, who looked up at him with fear. With a sneer, he summoned Void Gear and held it high, making sure Ventus could see just how sharp it was. One quick flick of his wrist, and the blond apprentice lay crumpled on the ground, bleeding.

Aqua was awake again, but she knew better than to pit her will against his. Instead, he could feel her searching for more underhanded methods, some loophole in his scheme.

He could feel her reaching out for her friends.

He laughed merrily. She still didn't get it! She, Ventus and Terra, they were all convinced that friendship would save them.

But it wouldn't, because that's what Vanitas was fighting for too . . .

"Get up," Master Xehanort told him.

Vanitas didn't respond, still trying to get used to his new face. It felt so strange to have skin after spending so long as a being of darkness. He didn't like the way bones and skin restricted his movement, although he knew that it made him stronger.

"I said get up!"

Groaning, Vanitas did so, and was rewarded by a keyblade in his gut. He snarled, and was immediately punished for his insolence like an animal. By the end, he was curled up on the ground, blood filling his mouth and his lungs screaming for air.

"You are weak," Xehanort said. "No different than the one you describe yourself as superior to."

He flinched at the reminder of his lighter half. Ventus had been his only friend, but about a week ago, Vanitas had admitted that he couldn't completely surpass his urges to hurt the boy, and Xehanort had taken him away. He didn't understand why; wasn't it a good thing he had admitted his shortcomings? Xehanort was supposed to help him, not hurt him.

But Xehanort didn't, and Vanitas slept alone, knees held against his chest for warmth.

He woke in a very strange place. He was in a soft bed, with gentle rays of sunlight entering through the window. His body moved without his consent, studying the room, vision disappearing for a millisecond as the eyes blinked. Although Vanitas couldn't move, it didn't bother him as much as it should, and he hung about, curious.

He wasn't wearing his bodysuit. No, that was skin he saw, pale hands pushing back the covers. The eyes blinked again, focusing on the soft green walls and the scene outside. It was not a desert that he saw, but a sea of grass under a bright blue sky. He wanted desperately to run over and get a closer look, but he was not in charge of this body, and there was no way to communicate his desires to the host.

"You're awake!"

The head turned, revealing a blue-haired girl standing in the doorway. Was she smiling at him? She couldn't be; no one smiled that way at him anymore, not since he had separated from Ventus.

But it was this body that she smiled at, and his eyes that she stared into. The gaze was so intense, so warm, that for a moment, Vanitas forgot he was only an observer. He only remembered that when the arm failed to reach out for her.

"I was scared you would never wake up," the girl said. His mind thrummed with excitement when she touched his shoulder, and he could feel it. When she pulled away, he nearly cried, yearning to feel that touch again and know that this was occurring somewhere outside his head.

"Terra, Master, he's awake!"

Xehanort? He retreated into himself with fear; Xehanort would be furious if he realized that Vanitas no longer had control over his own body. But Xehanort was not with the two people that entered, and he looked closely when it became apparent Xehanort wasn't here.

The one who spoke first was the oldest, with black hair and a scar down his left cheek. Vanitas could see the respect the other two held for him, and wished that this body would straighten up a little.

"Ventus," the man asked, "how are you feeling?"

Ventus? Why were they still calling him by that name? He was Vanitas now. He tried to open his mouth to say that, and then after that failed, finally understood what was going on. This was Ventus' body he was in. Then this meant that somewhere, Ventus was experiencing this. He felt lonely, but then shook that off when a brown-haired boy spoke.

"Master, are you sure he's awake?"

Going off the girl's previous words, this must have been Terra who had spoken. The older man must have been the Master she was referring to, but what was her name?

"Ventus, can you hear me?"

Say something, idiot! Vanitas snarled in his head. As if Ventus had heard him, he nodded his head.

"See?" The girl cried. "He's alive!"

Terra said, "It's not like I said he was dead, Aqua."

Aqua, so that was her name. Aqua, Terra and the Master, he mulled over this new information as the two kids argued playfully. The Master continued to study Ventus, likely puzzled by the lack of life in the boy. Yes, that was something Vanitas found puzzling as well. If he were in control, he would be off exploring or getting to know these people.

"Well, Ventus," the Master said, "welcome to our home."

Home. Though Vanitas had no body, he could feel warmth where his heart should be. It amazed him that one simple word could do so much; up to now, his heart had felt icy cold. He thought that since his heart was only made of darkness, it could only feel that way. Now he knew better, and he wasn't ever going to forget.

Terra ran up to him, peering into his face as if he was a brand-new puppy. "So, what was it like training under Master Xehanort? Is he as creepy as he looks?"

The Master quirked a brow ("Aqua thinks so, too!" Terra protested), but it was Aqua who interceded. She pulled Terra away, shushing him and saying, "He's probably confused."

In a manner of speaking he was - he had no idea how he was currently in Ventus' head or why – but it was a confusion he would gladly deal with. He only wished that Ventus would do a bit more than sit there. At least his other half could do him the favour of looking around!

"Are you hungry, Ventus? There's food in the kitchen . . ."

The rest of Aqua's words were lost as the world began to blur. With his nonexistent hands, Vanitas tried to grab something, tried to anchor himself to this reality. But his efforts were in vain and little by little, the world faded to black.

Then, there was nothing.

He awoke on a desert floor, sand whipping across his helmet and tumbleweeds rolling in the distance. He opened and closed his hands, checking that this body was his, and sighed, not sure which scenario he liked best.

When he saw Xehanort waking up though, he knew.

From thereon out, his dreams were his life. He got to know them all: the girl that made sure he ate and gently brushed his hair, the boy who pulled him outside and introduced him to new and exciting games, the Master that welcomed him and gave him all the time he needed to get better. They were his family, and he cherished every moment.

But he had to wake up.

He lived for sleeping, to wake back in that world where he was loved. So, he threw himself into his training, working himself until he was exhausted. He wanted it to be that way, wanted to be able to sleep the second his head hit the ground. Xehanort never suspected that it was anything other than fear and obedience that drove him, and so, Vanitas was able to switch back and forth between heaven and hell.

But then the other him got better, and it was harder to pretend.

Before, Ventus had just been an emotionless corpse, as much an observer as Vanitas was. Then he got better, and Aqua and Terra began to change. They spoke of how adorable and happy he was, how much light was in his heart, used his other half's nickname. And Vanitas wanted to rave and scream at them to stop calling him that, that his name was Vanitas, not Ventus or Ven. But they didn't hear him, and every day, the proverbial distance between them grew.

Every day, he hated Ventus a little more for taking what had been his, even if they had never actually belonged to him.

As the distance between them grew, he craved Aqua and Terra's friendship even more. It was like an addiction he couldn't shake, and they featured in all of his waking dreams. Eventually, his will spilled over into Ventus, overpowered Ventus, and he was in control. It only worked at night, when his lighter half's mind was asleep, and then Vanitas could direct his movements. He still wasn't in control of the body, per say, but he could nudge it into action with his thoughts.

"Ven?"

His mind froze up. He had been exploring the different rooms of the castle – he hadn't meant to walk into Aqua's room.

"Did you have another nightmare?" Aqua asked.

Figuring it was too late to simply walk away and pretend this never happened, he urged the body towards her. Aqua said nothing and gathered him into her arms, stroking his hair.

"It's okay," she whispered, "you're safe."

Vanitas didn't know how to react at first, but he quickly decided it was best to do nothing and let her continue. She rocked him back and forth like a child, holding him close. Responding to Vanitas' contentment, Ven's body snuggled closer to her, and buried his head in her shoulder. Vanitas did nothing else as Aqua stroked his hair, and he lost himself completely in her love. This, truly, was paradise.

And it was with those thoughts that the seeds of obsession were planted.

Ventus must have been doing this on purpose.

Lately, Ventus had taken to following Terra around everywhere he went. It was always 'Terra said this' and 'Terra did that'. It was enough to drive anyone nuts.

While Vanitas did like Terra and enjoyed his friendship, he was still irritated that Ventus always had to be around him. Why couldn't he go hang out with Aqua for once? It was nothing personal, he simply preferred her. There was no doubt that she and Terra both loved Ventus (and by extension, Vanitas), but they went about showing it in different ways. Terra treated Ventus like a brother, with punches and games and actions that could be just as easily applied to a simple friendship. With Aqua though, there was no doubt that you were loved, and after a long day with Xehanort, that's what Vanitas needed most.

It seemed though, that Ventus was determined to deprive him of that. Even in those cases where Aqua did get to express her motherly side, Ventus acted embarrassed and discouraged her. Vanitas didn't understand; what was so awful about knowing you were loved? If it were him, he'd wring every drop out of those moments.

(Sometimes, he thought he would make a better friend to them than Ventus did)

But whatever Ventus' reasoning may be, Vanitas couldn't ignore that it was having an effect. Aqua was treating Ventus more like a little brother or a friend now, and Vanitas hated it. She shouldn't be changing for Ventus, especially since there was someone out there who liked her just the way she was.

But she kept changing, and although Vanitas threw a fit, there was nothing he could do to stop it. And as she kept changing, as she turned away from the Aqua he wanted, it only hurt more.

His heart screamed. He never expected that something would hear it.

"Don't wander off," Xehanort grunted. "This is a strange place."

Vanitas looked around the foggy town with boredom. It didn't seem all that impressive to him. Rather, the town appeared to be abandoned, with windows boarded up and deep cracks in the road. It was no surprise; with a name like Silent Hill, the place practically declared itself a ghost town.

The fog was thick around them, and he could only see shadows as his Master smashed through a door with his keyblade and stepped inside. Vanitas followed, his yellow eyes narrowing into slits as he adjusted to the light. He watched as Xehanort tore open the drawers of a desk and rummaged inside. When his search revealed nothing, Xehanort snarled and ripped the drawers out completely.

"The letter said it was here!" he growled.

Asking only for the sake of asking, Vanitas said, "Said what is here?"

"A journal," Xehanort explained, "from one of the few survivors of the Keyblade War. It may hold a secret to unlocking Kingdom Hearts."

Vanitas shrugged. He kicked at the ground, the action stirring up a cloud of dust. "Why does it matter? You have me, don't you?"

"It never hurts to have an alternative."

Vanitas scowled at the idea that he may be expendable. Without stopping to ask for permission, he walked outside, holding his hand out to catch the snowflakes. They melted quickly on his palm, becoming nothing more than a dark speck on his suit.

"It appears," he said conversationally, "that I am nothing more than a pawn, after all."

A light wind sent a swirl of snow floating past him.

A voice spoke.

But a pawn who may become a king.

The voice resonated through his very being, vibrating through the bonds of his molecules. It was here and everywhere, spoken by a million voices. There was no gender he could pick out, but the strangeness of that didn't matter. Less than ten words and already, he was enthralled.

"Who are you?" he asked.

You know who I am.

His heart reacted, the darkness inside reaching out to the voice. Helpless to resist, unwilling to resist, he walked away from his Master, following the pull of his heart. The voice, the darkness urged him onwards, guiding him gently.

The doors to the church opened for him. It smelt of dust and mould and there were cobwebs in the corners. Yet there was something pristine about this place, untouched. He had a feeling that if it wanted to, the church could have been perfectly clean.

But it kind of was, he then noticed. Dust lined the floor, save for the aisle in which he stood. A clear path had been laid out for him, leading to the moonlit altar in the center of the room. As he walked towards it, the ground seemed to swallow the sound of his footsteps, so that all there was the steadily building buzz of anticipation.

On the altar was a single stand, and on that, a thick book. Gingerly, he reached out for it. He chickened out halfway and instead of opening the book, he stroked its spine and let his hand fall back to his side. Opening that book, it would be opening a door he couldn't close again. How he knew that, he didn't know. He just did.

The silence was deafening. Like a child looking to steal treats from the cookie jar, Vanitas slyly glanced around. His hand twitched at his side, and he curled it into a fist to stop the movement.

He knew he shouldn't, but he wanted to open that book.

And everyone knew that when he had the opportunity, Vanitas did whatever he wanted.

Blank pages met him as he flung the cover open. A cloud of dust settled upon his helmet, clinging to his hand when he brushed it off.

"Empty," he scoffed, feeling suddenly foolish for being so intrigued in the first place.

He slammed the cover in disappointment, and turned his eyes back to the doors. He had to get back before Xehanort noticed. The pain of Xehanort discovering Vanitas had disobeyed him wasn't worth an empty book.

Not empty. Waiting.

"Waiting . . ." he echoed. "For what?"

For you to fill it.

The pages flew open and turned one after another, stopping in the middle of the book. These pages, unlike the rest, were filled. The paper was filled with dark, crowded faces wreathed by flames, all clambering to climb over and above each other, save for one figure. In the center of the two pages was the very same altar that he stood upon now. Only one person stood there. Him, glorious and free, the mightiest of them all.

You can create beings from the hearts of others. I can see into the depths of their souls. Together, we would be God.

Darkness swirled around him, caressing him.

Say the word, and become the god you were meant to be. Become one with the darkness.

"Xehanort . . ."

Say the word, and you will be free of him forever.

Vanitas closed his eyes. "I'll do it."

With his permission, the darkness poured into his soul. He could feel it everywhere, sense it everywhere he looked. It was no longer the insentient force that everyone else wielded, but alive. It spoke to him, told him everything that went on in the town.

No, not the town. His town. Vanitas had never been here before, but he suddenly knew every street, could suddenly tell apart the illusions from reality. He could feel every heart within the town's borders.

And he could feel the monsters. With a thought, he delved into their memories, seeing who they used to be and how they had met their fate. The sheer amount of information almost overwhelmed him. Almost. Certainly, a normal person wouldn't have been able to deal with it, but he had never been normal.

His body prickled, like someone had sunk a hook into his back and was trying to reel him in. He scowled. Xehanort must have discovered his absence, and was trying to summon him like he would the heartless. But Vanitas was no longer some mindless being with no goals of his own. He was the true master of the darkness.

He calls you like a common dog. Let us be rid of him.

"Yes," he hissed. With encouragement from the darkness, he dove into Xehanort's mind, found that part of him that reached for the light; the part of Xehanort that knew how horrible his plans were, and felt guilty for it.

The sirens howled.

Xehanort looked up as he heard the sound of metal scraping against rock.

"Aqua . . ." he whispered as he slowly awoken. Another dreamless night. It seemed that as time passed, Ventus allowed Vanitas into his mind less and less. Though he hated to admit it, it terrified him. Would Aqua and Terra forget him? Surely, they must have noticed that sometimes, there was someone other than Ventus there.

He loathed his other half. Ventus was the weak one, the reason Xehanort had decided to separate them in the first place. And yet despite the fact that Vanitas was the one constantly struggling, that he was the one who had fought and sheltered Ventus' lifeless being from the worst of Xehanort's rage, Ventus got all the awards. As great as it was, Vanitas had never asked for all this power over darkness. All he had ever asked for were his friends, and Ventus had gone and stolen them from underneath his nose.

He growled. Ventus was the epitome of selfishness. Aqua and Terra deserved better.

With the town's expansive memory and the darkness aiding him, Vanitas quickly adapted to his role as the master of Silent Hill. It wasn't that hard; Silent Hill called those it wanted. All he had to do with every visitor was search their heart, mould their darkest secrets into something physical and judge. Sometimes, he let them escape; sometimes, he let them live, but trapped them; and sometimes, he let the darkness consume them entirely. He grew accustomed to his role, to being the judge and executioner, to being all knowing and infallible.

To being a god.

So when Harry Mason and his daughter escaped without his permit, it was a horrible shock.

It's because you are incomplete, the darkness said. You need Ventus.

Like it or not, Vanitas knew that was true. However, he was very reluctant to act. Ventus was his window into Aqua and Terra's lives. Without him, Vanitas would never see them again.

That doesn't have to be true. You are a god. Take them. Bind them to you forever.

He shook his head. "I can't do that to them. They're my friends."

The darkness argued, but he was deaf to it.

He jolted awake, his heart feeling . . . warm.

"What is this?" he asked in awe. His rubbed his chest, feeling warmth soak through his bodysuit and into his hand.

Do you feel it? the darkness asked. Look into your heart.

He did, and felt it: an elastic chord, binding him to another. No matter how far he was or how much he twisted it, that chord would always be there. He would always be connected to those on the other side.

But who were they?

Close your eyes and see.

He obeyed and at once, the memory flashed in his mind.

(Three star-shaped charms: blue, orange and green.

"One for each of us," Aqua said.

The three of them stood in a circle, holding their charms out for the others to see.

"Somewhere out there," she said, "there's this tree with star-shaped fruit . . .")

"An unbreakable connection," Vanitas muttered as the memory ended. He smiled to himself, and reached up for his Wayfinder . . .

Nothing.

The smiled dropped away. Vanitas felt strangely empty, as if someone had reached inside him and torn something precious out. They were connected to him, but Ventus had taken his Wayfinder. Had stolen that as well.

Then take it back, the darkness hissed. Take your friends back.

Vanitas shook his head, and fell back to old arguments. "I can't."

You don't have to do anything to them, the darkness said, and he could feel it pressing around him. Because she already did it for you.

Darkness swirled in his palm, forming a shadow of one of the Wayfinders. She has already begun the processing of binding Terra and herself to you. You will just finish it.

He blinked. The darkness was right. All he would be doing was saving Aqua the energy of finishing the spell herself. She had already bound herself to him. That must have meant that she and Terra remembered him, that they wanted to be with him.

Who was he to deny them, especially since that had been all he ever wanted?

They were here, on his world, and he was so close to gaining everything. He wouldn't chicken out now.

He forced the sleeping Ventus up, and directed him towards the town.

Vanitas loomed above Ventus as the latter struggled against the darkness that held him prisoner. With quick, deft fingers, he snatched the green Wayfinder off the blonde boy's neck and held it up to the light to admire it. He would have preferred a colour like red or black, but whatever. It was the thought that counted.

"Give that back!" Ventus cried.

"Why?" Vanitas said, tilting his head. "It's mine. It always has been."

"No, Aqua gave that to me -"

"She gave it to me!" he roared. "And you stole it!"

"Huh?" Ventus glanced from Vanitas to Aqua, eyes wide with confusion. "What are you talking about – none of us have ever seen you before!"

Vanitas laughed wildly. "You would think that, wouldn't you?" Ventus had done a great job at replacing Vanitas in their thoughts. When Aqua and Terra had entered the town, all Vanitas had been able to pick up was concern about Ventus. They hadn't thought once about him.

It infuriated him, and despite himself, he punished them.

Sure, some of that would have had to happen anyways. He didn't like how Terra kept blaming himself for Officer Fair's death, and Aqua's light had prevented his spells from working. But there had been moments where he'd simply lost his temper and the town had acted upon it. That was in the past, though; he'd make it up to them.

He placed the green Wayfinder around his neck, so that it rested atop his heart. "It doesn't matter," he told Ventus. "Now, we'll be one again."

"Be one?"

Vanitas laughed. "Don't tell me you don't remember! We're two halves of the same heart, idiot. That genius Xehanort thought it would be funny to split us apart."

"Y-you're me?" Ventus sounded disgusted at that, and Vanitas snarled.

"No," he grabbed Ventus by the throat, "you're me."

Darkness erupted from the space around them and swept over the glass. It etched a circle around him and Ventus, encasing them in impossibly high flames. There was no heat from this inferno, but his mask cracked anyways, falling away bit by bit to reveal his face.

His golden eyes gleamed as he brought his face close to Ventus. "Now," he said gleefully, "you're going to go back to where you belong. . ."

Aqua started fighting again, but he ignored her. Even if she somehow broke free, there was nothing she could do.

Void Gear came to him, crackling with manic energy.

"To oblivion!"

With that, he plunged his keyblade into Ventus' heart.

This is something I wondered about in the game. If Aqua and Terra are connected to Ventus' heart through the Wayfinders and Vanitas is part of Ventus, doesn't that mean that they are in someway connected to Vanitas too? Bet they won't be happy to know that.

Until next time!