Not even the sight of my sister alive could raise my spirits back up, but they sure as hell helped. I hobbled towards Jordyn as quickly as could, throwing my arms around her the second I was close enough. I buried my face in her hair, sobbing ridiculously as she smiled weakly at me.

"Zip it, kid. If anyone's crying, it should be me. Do you see this?" She whispered, pointing to a long gash on her boob. "That's going to scar! I'm not scar material, Kim!"

"It'll make you look badass." I murmured, wiping my face and sniffing.

"Or like someone got really pissed and just had at you with a woofle ball bat." Katie shrugged, plopping down at the end of the bed. Jordyn kicked at her, rolling her eyes.

"Whatever, I'm still hot," she smiled confidently, brushing her hair out of her face. "Not that you two don't look dazzling yourselves. I'd say we made it out pretty well, no?"

"Us, yes. You, not so much." I winked at her, poking her in the forehead. She wrinkled her nose and sniffed herself.

"Someone needs a shower."

"Yeah, no shit Sherlock. You've been out for two days."

"TWO DAYS?" Jordyn panicked, grabbing at her stomach. I snatched her hands away and held them up.

"Before you kill someone, calm down. They took care of the babies."

"They did?"

"Emergency procedure, everything's taken care of."

Katie, Jared, Brady and I exchanged nervous glances as the lie flew across the room, worried that someone would spill. Jordyn laid back on her pillow, shifting in her bed uncomfortably.

"You hungry?" Emily asked, poking her head through the door. Jordyn's face lit up as our friend scurried to her bedside, throwing her arms around her. I watched the two girls embrace, wondering how long it would last. My bet was not very long.

"Em, I'm so glad you're alright!" Jordyn beamed, kissing her temple. "You guys all have to tell me what happened, I don't even remember what happened." She said, throwing her blonde waves into a bun on top of her head.

"Some douchebag on the road was driving." Katie started, fiddling with a red lock of hair.

"It was ridiculous," I jumped in. "The kid had been drinking a ton, two different bottles were empty on the dashboard."

"We tried to get his attention, but he couldn't even hear us. All he did was wave like a kid from the lollipop guild and try to focus on the road again."

"There was way too much traffic for me to move over," Emily explained sadly. "I kept trying, but no one knew what was going on, so no one paid attention.

"Eventually he tipped the back of the car and we were lost after that point."

"Yeah, there was no going back after that," Katie jumped in encouragingly. "Like 20 different cars flew into us, we were off the road in a minute tops, it was crazy."

"All I remember was grabbing Kim's hand. I was so scared, it was like I knew what was happening but I didn't at the same time!" Emily cried, her eyes growing wide in memory of the tale.

"Oh God, that was the worst part," Katie hissed. "It was horrid. I knew we were in the air, and if that was the case, I knew we'd have to hit the ground again at some point. There was glass in my throat, swallowing felt like Hell."

"It was so loud, my ears had popped so badly that it was like watching a silent movie. One second I could see everything, the next I was out."

"Who was the first to wake up?" Jordyn cried, clearly entertained.

"Kim, as always." Emily laughed lightly, rolling her eyes.

"Oh you would snatch the hero position before any of us got a chance." Jordyn scoffed, nudging me with her foot.

"Are you joking? I felt like death, crawling out of that car was the scariest thing I've ever done." I said, earning a laugh from Emily. We both knew it was not the scariest thing I'd ever done. She'd seen me run from leeches in a pitch-black forest, crawling out of a burning car was a walk in the park. "I woke Katie up first, just because she was closest to me, her leg was broken. You were out cold, Jor. It was really bad, we barely got a snide comment out of you-which is how you know it's bad because you have those things on deck 24/7," I teased. "Emily was able to move after a while. We all helped with the CPR, we were just trying to make you breathe, but finally the paramedics got there and….we woke up here. Welcome home?"

"Dear Lord, what a story."

"Did you expect anything less than ridiculous?"

"With you three involved? Absolutely not. We're just lucky nobody was seriously hurt. When can I see the babies?"

The room got very quiet. Someone had to break the ice, and now.

"Jordyn…" I started. She looked at me innocently, a blonde lock falling out of her bun and framing her face gracefully. A loud, happiness-ruining sound erupted from the room next door. Ice split down my spine, my entire body turning numb as I realized who it was that lost a child. It was written on everyone's faces. Katie's, Brady's, even Jared was having a hard time covering his horror, and as Jordyn beamed happily at all of us, I wondered how the hell we were going to be able to tell her that she'd lost a child, that I'd lost a niece or nephew. I buried my face in my hands. I thought we'd have more time than this, thought we'd have a slight chance to explain. Emily sat paralyzed at the edge of the bed, her hand covering her mouth as if it would help quiet the screaming baby girl next door. Damn it all.

"Is that….are they here?" Jordyn demanded, her eyes lighting up with joy. She started glowing as she bounced up and down in her bed, clapping her hands together like a little girl. "Come on, where are the twins?" she cheered, smiling at us all while Sam walked in, handing his daughter to Emily. "Where are the twins?"

I looked to Jared, who seemed just as helpless as I was. Reluctantly, I slid away from the itchy sheets, making my way around the curtain to the small basinets in between the two rooms. The sight of only two made my stomach turn again. The acid was coming back. I tried to keep a steady hand as I lifted the small baby boy out of his slumber, his tiny frame resting neatly against my breast. He was warm. Angel-like. He looked all too healthy for a pre-mature child, but I was beyond grateful. Perhaps this would give Jordyn hope. Perhaps she wouldn't slaughter us all.

Jared did a double-take as I walked in with the baby, something shifting in his expression. I didn't have to ask what he saw, I already knew, because as I caught a glance of my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I saw it too. I wasn't bringing Jordyn's child to her, I was holding Jared Thail's son, I was holding my son, the one I'd always talked about wanting. Jared had promised not to bring it up again, he never said he wouldn't dream.

"Ohhh….baby…" Jordyn cooed quietly as I set the small child in her arms. She was illuminating the room now with her happiness, Lucas climbing over the bed to sit next to her and get a better look. The two of them were balling, sobbing happily over their new child, their new gift. If only they knew.

"That's my son!" Lucas exclaimed happily. "That's my baby boy!"

"It's Evan." Jordyn smiled quietly through tears.

"You're beautiful." I told them all, Jared wrapping an arm around my waist as we watched the couple coo over their child. "You're all beautiful."

It wasn't for them as much as it was for me. I needed to soak all of this in, needed to feel what it was like to be in the presence of a normal, happy family before the ungratefulness and hatred started to seep in. At this point, we were clean people-one's who had forgiven and forgotten, because we'd faced just how scary it was to nearly lose each other. We didn't have much time left, didn't have a whole lot of options to exhaust before the battle started up, and as tears welled up in my eyes I was hit hard with the fact that nothing good lasts forever in a world like this one.

"Jordyn before you get too excited, you have to know…"

"Know what?" she smiled, looking up at me.

"Jordyn, there was…I mean…"

"One of the babies…."Katie tried.

"Jordyn, one of the babies is gone." I blurted, the tears already beginning to well up in my eyes. Emily looked like someone had just tazed her, her jaw hitting the floor as the words poured out of my mouth.

Jordyn's face was expressionless, completely blank, as if the words were unrecognizable.

"What?"

"One of the babies didn't make it, Jor."

"Whose? Whose is it?"

"Jordyn, we should talk about…"

"Emily, is it yours?" Jordyn whirled in the sheets, going from a graceful angel to a frazzled demon in two seconds. Emily was crying already, Jordyn unable to decipher her tears.

"Where's the baby girl? Is she over there?" Jordyn asked, handing the baby to Lucas. There was a knock at the door as a nurse waltzed in happily, the baby girl in her arms.

Jordyn's eyes locked on the child, the room growing dead silent as the woman walked right past her, heading towards Emily instead. The nurse handed Emily a bottle, starting spewing feeding instructions while my sister sat in a daze amongst her sheets. Nobody moved. Not even after the nurse left, not a sound except for Em's daughter sucking away at her bottle. Lucas kissed his son on the forehead, tears pouring out of his eyes as he cried for his lost daughter.

"Jordyn…"my voice cracked as I moved forward. "Jordyn, it…"

"No. No, no, no, no…" she was trailing off, her face twisted in pain.

"Jordyn, it was bad crash, it..." I was trying, I was trying so damn hurt to make things alright that it hurt.

"No, no, no, no!"

"Jordyn, please!" I kneeled down in front of her, praying to God she'd listen to me.

"NO!" She screeched, her hand missing my face by inches. Lucas nearly threw his son to Jared, who was coddling the frightened child quietly, his heat soothing.

Jordyn was swinging at anyone and everyone, her sobs being choked out in the middle of her throat before they could make sensible noise. She collapsed in a heap on the floor as I sat in the corner, my hands covering my mouth as my own sobs roared through the room, Emily trembling in Sam's arms behind the bed.

"NO!" She was screaming. "NO! MY POOR BABY! MY POOR BABY!"

"Shhh," Lucas murmured, his own tears flowing quickly. "Baby shh, please Love, I know, I know, breathe, breathe."

"I SHOULD'VE SAVED HIM!" She sobbed. "I SHOULD'VE TRIED TO SAVE HIM!"

"Jordyn stop! Jordyn please stop!" I screamed, feeling my insides ripping themselves a part. I couldn't watch this. It was killing me.

"I HATE YOU!" She was screaming at Emily, who looked like she was ready to jump out of the window. "I HATE YOU!"

"WATCH IT!" Sam ordered, his Alpha tone exploding through the room. Jordyn wavered underneath the sound of his voice but kept at it, screeching every name in the book she could think of.

"I HATE YOU!"

"THIS WASN'T MY FAULT!" EMILY PLEADED. "NONE OF THIS WAS OUR FAULT!"

"IT ISN'T FAIR!"

"LIFE IS NOT FAIR JORDYN BUT IT ISN'T MY FAULT!"

"I HATE YOU!"

"I'M SORRY!" Emily sobbed, pleading for my sister to understand. "JORDYN I'M SORRY!" she screamed. Brady and Katie had taken the babies to the nursery, knowing full-well things were about to get ugly.

Jordyn lashed out at Lucas, clawing him, hitting him, doing whatever she could to get to Emily. Sam was shaking furiously standing in front of her, he was trembling so violently I was surprised it'd taken him that long to phase.

"Jared!" I screamed. It took him ten minutes to try and tow Sam out of the room, and even then he'd only gotten him to the doorway.

"HE'S NOT MOVING!" Jared called over his shoulder.

"I HATE YOU!"

"I'M SORRY!"

"I HATE YOU!"

"JORDYN I'M SORRY!"

"JARED, MOVE OUT OF THE GODAMN WAY!"

"IF YOU PHASE IN HERE YOU'LL KILL EVERYBODY!"

"MY BABY!"

"MOVE, DAMMIT!"

"STOOOOOOOP!" I screeched, my voice popping at the intensity of the sound. I was clawing at my own ears, laying against the cold floor, sobbing so violently I was sure I'd throw up in a matter of minutes if all of it continued. I sprang to my feet and lurched at Jordyn, grabbing her wrists. She thrashed at me, and I gave her a little give, allowing her to get a punch or two, to scratch me here and there because she deserved it, because if it was what made her feel better, I'd be her punching bag all day long.

I was positive she'd continue, positive she'd knock me the fuck out-Sam being the one who was holding Jared back now, the doorframe shaking, Emily screaming into her pillow on the couch, Lucas doing his best to keep his baby's mother from murdering someone. Jordyn gave out of nowhere, slinking to the floor, clinging to me for dear life, sobbing into my clothes, telling me she loves me, sobbing that she's sorry, that she doesn't hate anyone, that she needs her baby, that she's already a failure.

We laid in that heap for what felt like hours, Mom came and went, Brady came and went, Jordyn and I never left, refused to move, as if we were demanding time to stop for us. We needed it. When I'd finally gotten her back in bed, and she'd stayed quiet long enough that I knew if I left she'd be okay, days had passed. A week. Two.

****I knocked lightly on the door before entering, Lucas cooing to Evan as he laid on his chest, Jordyn staring at the wall across from her like she had for the past two weeks. There was nothing she would do, nothing she would say. At least in the beginning, when she'd spend hours a day screaming at all of us, we knew what was going on in her mind. Four days before, I'd found her in a pool of her own blood sobbing on the bathroom floor, a baby girl's dress and a pair of scissors in hand. She'd been cutting, starving herself, refusing to go outside…she was a vegetable, a shell, nothing more than that.

"Want anything?" I asked quietly. She didn't move. Didn't answer. "Food? Or something to drink?"

"No." she murmured, barely audible.

"Jordyn you can't live like this," I whispered, sitting on the side of her bed. "You haven't eaten in three days."

"Congratulations, you can count."

"You're gonna die like this, Jor. They're gonna start force-feeding you."

"Okay?"

"Jordyn why won't you-"

"Leave," she hissed, not taking her eyes off the wall. "If you or Emily don't shove it quick, don't bother coming here at all."

I flinched at her tone, afraid to ask what was going through her mind. I'd never seen my sister in such a destructive state, never seen so many self-inflicted cuts and bruises littering her body before a few weeks ago. It was ripping me a part. Emily shifted uncomfortably in her corner of the couch, staring at her fingers like she did every time she visited Jordyn. The two were either screaming at each other or sitting two feet away from each other silently, there was no in between with them lately.

"Do you think maybe we should just leave? Just let your Mom and Jordyn sort it out themselves with a counselor?"

"It's so much worse than that, Jared."

"Explain it to me then." He murmured, stroking my cheek as we lay in my hospital bed three nights later.

"She hasn't eaten, she won't speak…the other night Lucas caught her trying to steal extra sleeping pills and a bottle of vodka from the hospital supply. She's gonna die if we leave her here Jared, she's gonna kill herself." I sobbed quietly, Jared stroking away each tear as it fell down my face.

"No, baby. No she won't. No she won't."

"Jared I'm scared."

"I know, Love. She's missing something, something she's built her entire future around. She needs a void filler, a patch job. Nothing can heal a heart that broken."

"Nothing but what's missing." I murmured, finishing the quote from the last English assignment I'd gotten. Jared spent all night staying up and reading the damn thing to me just so I wouldn't fail the multiple choice quiz the next day. "Nothing but what's missing." I whispered again, sitting up slowly. Jared furrowed his brow, noticing the plot hatching in my mind.

"Jared, this entire stay at the hospital, Jordyn hasn't held the baby girl once." I murmured.

"There's a point to that, Kim…it isn't safe for-"

"That's what you all think, but that's what she's missing! She's missing a second child, a second place to store all her emotion, Jared I have an idea, come on, one last option and then I promise we'll get her a counselor." Jared pursed his lips, considering my idea before caving and leading me to Emily's room.

"I need you to come with me." I told my friend of what felt like forever, her daughter nestled cozily in her arms. "And I need you to bring the baby."

"She's not going in the same room with Jordyn." Sam growled.

"Sam, please. I have an idea." I begged.

"Yeah, and look how far all of those have gotten us."

"Watch it." Jared said darkly, his voice deepening. I almost jumped, the voice was nearly unrecognizable and even shook Sam up a little. Sam's eyes flickered between Emily and I, and the more the both of us pressed on him, the further he caved.

"Fine." He grumbled. "But you have five minutes. Emily slid out of bed with her daughter in arms, following Jared and I as we led her to Jordyn's room.

The game was blaring on the t.v. again, Lucas and Evan sound asleep on the couch as usual. Jordyn was staring at her wall again.

"Hi Jordyn." I said awkwardly, unsure of how to start. She didn't answer me.

"Jordyn." Emily murmured softly.

"What do you want?" my sister growled, almost inhumanly. Emily took in a deep breath.

"You need to see the baby." I said softly.

"Shove it in the garbage disposal." Jordyn hissed. Emily flinched, fury blazing in her eyes.

"Now you-"

"Em," I warned, shaking my head. Emily stepped back slightly, regaining her self-control. "Jordyn, you need to see the baby."

"I don't want to see the baby!" Jordyn growled a little louder.

"You have to see the-"

"I DON'T WANT IT."

"YOU HAVE TO SEE THE BABY JORDYN."

"I DON'T WANT TO SEE THE DAMN BABY!" she screamed, clawing at her ears.

"YOU HAVE TO SEE THE BABY!" I repeated over and over, Jordyn screeching her own retorts, shaking Lucas from his sleep so suddenly that he nearly fell off the couch.

"GET THE DAMN THING OUT OF HERE!" Jordyn screamed, her expression wild. Lucas fled with Evan. "GET IT OUT!" We were screaming back and forth, neither letting up on our attack.

"YOU HAVE TO SEE THE BA-"

"SWEAR TO GOD KIM I'LL KILL Y-"

"YOU'RE LOSING YOUR MIND AND YOU HAVE TO SEE THE-"

"I'LL KILL ALL OF YOU I'LL-"

"EMILY, TELL HER WHAT YOU NAMED THE BABY!"

"GET IT O-"

"Arbor." Emily said softly, trying to hold back tears.

Jordyn's eyes flickered, her hands leaving her ears.

"What did you just say?" she asked, more afraid than angry now.

"Her name is Arbor." Emily choked out.

The room was silent as Jordyn's expression changed from demonic to human, and for the first time in weeks I saw my sister. Tears overflowed her hazel eyes, her blonde hair washing over her neck and shoulders. Emily was nearly balling, holding the small peacemaker in her arms. Jared squeezed my hand and kissed me on the temple.

"You're amazing." He murmured as Emily moved slowly towards the bed, Arbor in hands. She sat down, Jordyn craning her neck to get a good look. She picked up a finger and gently tried to move away part of the blanket, Arbor twitching suddenly and grasping her finger.

Jordyn melted in seconds, her old self washing through her as she started bawling, gently pulling her finger away to join the others over her mouth, pain and regret leaving her system with each tear.

"What happened to me?" she whispered sadly as Emily handed me the baby. "What's wrong with me?" she cried as the two huddled on the bed.

"Thank you." I murmured quietly to the sleeping princess in my arms, kissing her forehead gently. Jared wrapped himself around me and the small girl, our reflection in the mirror becoming my new favorite sight by the second. I kissed him goodnight and laid out along the bed with Emily and Jordyn, all of us crying softly as we huddled over the small baby, crying until we couldn't cry anymore. We cried because we were weak, because we could feel ourselves physically exhausted, because we realized we wouldn't be in this position if it weren't for the boys, and because we knew that our boys were the ones we loved most. We cried for Jordyn's lost daughter, for Emily's found miracle, for Evan and his strong father Lucas. We cried until there was nothing left to cry about, and then we cried more, our quiet sobs filling the room until we drifted off to sleep in each other's arms.