Chapter Twenty-Four

Sokka stared at the storefront, his hands fingering the knife tucked into the small of his back. The store was dark, and so were the windows of the second floor apartment. He steeled himself, pushing back the bile that surged in his throat.

He had to do this. For Azula.

The street was empty, the town as desolate as a desert as he climbed up the fire escape on the side of the building. He hesitated at the window, realizing that it was wide open, a cold breeze billowing the curtains.

Something about that open window made his veins run cold. He ducked into the window, dropping soundlessly onto the floor in a crouch. The inside of the room was as still as a tomb. He could make out the shape of a bed. And a body lying beneath the covers.

He listened, crouched there by the window, for the sound of breathing, but all he could hear was the flutter of the curtains, the distant sound of a cat in a trash can, his own breathing, and the blood thundering in his ears.

There was something else, as well. There was a coppery smell on the air. The smell of blood. The stench of death.

Cold sweat ran down his back as he slowly, cautiously, crept over to the bed.

Moonlight fell across Kato Sanyi's surprised face, his eyes just beginning to cloud. Blood speckled his cheeks in dark splashes. His throat was a ruin of tissue. Blood drenched the sheets, the walls, the floor, the ceiling.

Kato Sanyi was dead. Sokka's mind reeled as he pulled off one of his gloves. He touched the blood-drenched sheets. The blood was still warm to the touch. He hadn't been dead long.

"Fuck," Sokka ground out, slipping backward, breathing hard as adrenaline pumped through him. He slipped back out of the window and threw himself down the fire escape. He hit the ground running, turning back in the direction of the hotel.

He had to get to Azula.

Before the Smoke Demons got to her first.

Azula paced the room, her hands clenched together, palms sweaty. She glanced at the door to the hotel room every few paces, but the blank wood mocked her and it remained closed. Her stomach turned over again, fear sliding up her spine and nesting in a knot of tension on the back of her neck. Rolling her shoulders, she tried to justify Sokka's absence.

Maybe he was getting something to eat. Maybe he was getting more towels. Maybe he had left, gone back to Republic City, his life, his family and friends, his girlfriend. Maybe he had been kidnapped by Rian and was being tortured to death.

Each one brought her more and more anxiety as she paced the room. She could feel a tremble in her limbs, quaking up from her toes. Whispers started in her ears and she clapped her hands over them to tune it out.

"Stop...stop...stop..." she ground out, squeezing her eyes shut tightly against the discordant voices. She needed something to focus on. Pain.

Pain. She needed pain, something she could control...

But she had promised Sokka that she would stop harming herself, that she would find another way. Except there was no other way, not with Sokka so inexplicably gone. A void was opening in her, deep and bottomless. She wanted to tumble into it, to lose herself as she had back at the masquerade, but she couldn't.

Because she knew. For all her scenarios, she knew exactly what Sokka was doing, why he had gone. A sob left her and she dug her fingernails into her cheeks, pain piercing her, flooding her with relief just as the door opened, spilling Sokka into the room.

Azula launched herself across the space between them and he gathered her up in his arms, tucking his face against her neck and squeezing her so tightly in his arms that her still healing ribs ached. She held on just as tightly, however, her arms wrapping around his neck as he picked her up off of her feet.

"You're okay," he said roughly, the relief in his voice shooting warnings through her insides.

"Of course I'm okay, what about you? Where were you?" she said as Sokka's arms tightened even more. When he released her, he pulled back, his hands on her shoulders. The look in his eyes was grave and she noticed the pinch at the corners of his mouth.

"I went to kill Kato Sanyi," he said roughly and then shook his head, loosening his hair into his eyes.

"I didn't want that for you, Sokka," she said as he gripped her shoulders. "I tried to stop you, dammit and you still-"

"It doesn't matter, Azula."

"You had to kill-"

"But I didn't. He was already dead when I got there," he said roughly and let go of her. He looked exhausted as he ran his hand down his face. She stared at him in disbelief.

"He was already dead?"

"Yeah. Pretty freshly dead, actually," he said with a tightness in his voice that set off more alarms in her mind. "The assassin used a knife to slit his throat."

"Rian?"

"I don't know," he said, shaking his head again. "I was afraid that when I got back here you'd be... That the Smoke Demons would have attacked you or something. I don't know what I would have done if..." He let out a tremulous breath and looked into her eyes.

She felt her heart squeeze in her chest as Sokka reached for her.

"I'm okay," she said as she tucked her face against his hard chest again. His big arms wrapped around her once more and she felt the heat of his breath on her neck. He was shaking all over and she realized how terrified he was. That he really had thought he might come back to find her dead. That he cared.

"I'm afraid of what this could mean. I think they were sending us a message."

"What kind of message?"

"We failed to kill Kato Sanyi the way they wanted, at Shura's party. Who knows why they wanted him killed there, but they did. We failed, so they killed him to let us know that they know we failed," he said grimly. "They were watching us at the party, I think. They were waiting for this to happen."

Her brow lifted at that and she pulled away a little, catching the look of banked rage in his turbulent blue eyes.

"The Fire Bug... Do you think him showing up was intentional?"

"Who knows? Does it matter? We still failed, and they'll hurt you if they can because of that," he said, cupping her face. "I won't let them harm you, Azula."

She put her hand over his and leaned into his touch, a sad little half-smile on her lips. "It's not me I'm worried about, Sokka. It's you they've been threatening this whole time."

"What-" he started, but she stopped him with a look.

"Every death threat Rian has made has been directed at you, I think you were just so concerned with protecting me that you couldn't see it."

"That's not true."

Azula let out a shaking breath. "Don't you see, Sokka? They still need me. They think I want the throne, so they're promising that to me to get me to do whatever they want, which is kill Zuko. I can't do that if I'm dead."

"But they're not going to put you on the throne, Azula. You know that."

"They think I think that they will. I'm still Zuko's heir, so the throne would legally go to me if he died or abdicated, but the people of the Fire Nation wouldn't allow me to become the Fire Lord if they knew I was responsible for his death. For the same reason that my father had my mother poison Grandfather Azulon, instead of doing it himself. It would invalidate his claim to the throne if anyone suspected his hand in it."

"So they'll kill you after you kill Zuko for them," he said grimly.

"They might not even need to kill me if they can prove I killed Zuko. I'd be disinherited and imprisoned for life, probably in a cell right next to my father. I still serve a purpose to these people."

"Yeah, but that's what I'm worried about. We don't think they intend to keep you on the throne, but what would killing you accomplish? Who would get the throne after you were killed or imprisoned?"

"Uncle Iroh," she said softly. "He's the only other member of the immediate Royal family. After that, the laws of succession are complicated. We have some distantly related cousins that could possibly inherit it, but it might be easy to declare their claim illegitimate. The Fire Nation has some strict laws about succession and actual usurpers to the throne have no real chance of keeping power, unless they take over the military as well."

She paled a little as Sokka stiffened.

"Which is what the Smoke Demons have been trying to do. You know Mai suspects that they have operatives in the military."

"So they have me kill Zuko, declare my claim illegitimate and kill me or imprison me for my crimes to get me out of the way. Then Iroh inherits. He's old. They either kill him too, or they see his age as a weakness they can exploit and take over with a military coup. The Smoke Demons then have no one stop them from taking control of the throne and the Fire Nation."

"That's assuming they plan to kill you. They could always marry you off to whomever they wanted. Once you have an heir, they can knock you off after that. Your child will be raised by the Smoke Demons. A puppet Fire Lord."

She felt her stomach sink to her toes and she licked her lips. "Well, they'll be pretty disappointed if that's their plan."

"Why?" Sokka said, searching her face, brow furrowed. She turned away and tucked a stray strand of her hair behind her ear.

"I can't have children, Sokka," she said, and was surprised by the fact that her voice didn't waver. She felt nothing. She never really had. There was only a strange sense of relief.

"How do you know that?" he asked after a long silence, in which she could hear her own heartbeat. She shrugged and turned back around to face him.

"A few years ago, I had...umm... I got pregnant and I had it..." she swallowed and glanced at him. This was too close. Too close to thing she never wanted to say out loud, because that made it real. "I had it taken care of. It went wrong, though. I got very sick afterwards. A doctor in Ba Sing Se told me that I probably wouldn't be able to have children because of the infection."

Sokka's eyes widened. He swallowed, the apple of his throat bobbing. "I... I didn't know. I'm so sorry."

"I'm not," she said shortly and found that she meant it. "It's the only piece of mercy the universe has ever given me. I never wanted children, Sokka. Do you honestly think I'd make a good mother?"

Sokka reached out and touched her face, his thumb sliding along the half-moons her nails had made in her cheeks. "I don't know. For what's it's worth, I'm still sorry. For all of it. The father-"

She whipped away from him, feeling cold tremors sink through her chest. She could hear her pulse in her ears. "I don't want to talk about that and I think you know why."

Sokka ran a hand down his face.

"Yeah. Yeah, I do. Maybe you need to talk about it?"

"There's nothing to talk about, Sokka. That's over and done with. I've moved on."

"Is that why you still have nightmares every night?" he said quietly.

"Drop it, Sokka. Please."

"Okay," he said after a moment and then went and sat on the end of the bed. "Now's definitely not the time for that conversation anyway. We have a huge problem on our hands. The Smoke Demons are probably out to kill us."

"You mean you. To them you're expendable. Whether you believe it or not, it's what Rian has been threatening this whole time. To kill you if we fail."

"That's not all he's been threatening, Azula," Sokka said darkly. "I don't like the way Rian looks at you."

"Jealousy does not become you, Sokka."

"It's not jealousy," he said softly. "Even if I had a right to feel that way, which I don't, I'm pretty sure Rian the Terrorist wouldn't be much competition."

She bit down on her lower lip. "I don't think you have much competition anywhere, Sokka."

"Tell that to Suki," Sokka said and immediately winced.

She made a noise in the back of her throat, feeling as if someone had splashed her with cold water, right in the face. "Somehow bringing up your girlfriend feels more awkward than discussing abortion, Rian's creepy obsession with me, and assassination attempts. Lovely."

"It's an awkward situation."

"Because you kissed me," she said carefully, gauging his reaction. He didn't seem ashamed, just sad.

"Yeah."

She pushed her hair behind her ears again. "Are you going to do it again?"

"I shouldn't."

She crossed the room and sank down onto her knees before him. "But you want to."

He reached out and grasped her shaky hand. "I'm not sure what I want, Azula. I shouldn't, because of Suki. Because I don't want to be That Guy who cheats on his girlfriend. I hate That Guy, I always have. And I hate how easily I could justify kissing you right now. But it's not just that, it's... It's you, Azula."

"Because of... Of what I did?" she said, her voice raw again, but he shook his head.

"NO. No, it's not that. I told you, I don't care about that. Any of it. That's not why. It's more about... I don't know how to explain this. I'm not good at this shit."

"If it helps, I like it when you kiss me, Sokka."

"Yeah, I picked up on that a little," he joked, but it fell flat. He cleared his throat, feeling heat climbing his face. "Look, we're clearly attracted to one another and that's... That's a problem, because the last thing you need is some horny asshole messing around with your head, jerking you left and right because he has no right to be kissing you. You deserve better than that."

"Is this because of-?" She touched her temple with trembling fingers.

Sokka took a breath and looked away. "No. Yes. It's hard to explain."

"You think because I'm sick, because of whatever's wrong with me, that I can't make decisions about who I want to kiss?"

His face went crimson as he clocked the sharp, insulted tone in her voice. "I... Well... No, that's not what I meant."

"Then what did you mean?"

"I only meant that I don't want to take advantage of you. And kissing you like that, that's Taking Advantage of You, because I have no right to do that. None. You deserve better than that. You deserve someone who can love you, Azula. Without reservation."

"And you can't love me?" she asked breathlessly.

They stared at one another for a long moment, the tension in the room palpable. Finally, he found his voice, his hand drawing her hand flat against his heart and pressing it there. Azula's eyes bloomed with emotion.

"It's not that I can't, it's that I shouldn't...not in that way..." Sokka whispered and then looked stricken, as if he'd said far too much. There was a gigantic 'BUT' hovering in the air between them. She knew how he felt. Her whole body was on fire, something in her breaking open. "I have no right to say that to you, because-"

"Because of her."

"I love her, Azula, I really do, but I keep forgetting that and that scares the shit out of me. The way I feel scares the shit out of me. You scare the shit out of me."

"You scare me too. I've never felt..." she started and then stopped, biting her inner cheek. She ran her hand down the back of her neck, her heart pounding hard in her chest. She bit down on her tongue, feeling a wellspring of emotions that wanted to come bubbling up out of her. Their passionate embrace at Shura's masquerade party seemed to sit between them like a burning ember.

Despite everything that had happened, she hadn't been able to get it off of her mind. She could still feel the heat of his lips against hers, the touch his hands as they smoothed down her back, and threaded into her hair. He had wanted her. If she hadn't stopped them...

But she had. For a good reason.

"This isn't the place for this conversation, Sokka," she said, to give herself some time to think. He nodded.

"No, you're right. We need to leave. Find some place to hole up where they can't find us."

"But where? They're probably watching us right now. If we try to leave, they'll probably attack us."

"I won't let them hurt you," Sokka said, a growl in his voice as he looked up and met her gaze. His eyes blazed, fierce and protective. "I'd die before I let Rian put his hands on you."

She smiled sadly at him. "I believe you'd try."

"And I believe you'd knock me out to stop me," he said with a small smile that faded quickly. He reached out and cupped her face again. "I think a fight between me and Rian is pretty inevitable, though. That was a pretty clear message."

"He does seem to hate you a lot. I think Rian thinks you're beneath me."

"I'm pretty sure Rian's biggest problem is that he wants to be beneath you."

Azula rolled her eyes and made an exasperated sound. "Would you stop? Now is not the time for jokes and double entendres."

"It's my defense mechanism. The more shit-my-pants-terrified I am, the more inappropriate my humor becomes," he said, shrugging. "And I'm pretty fucking terrified right now. What are we going to do?"

"I don't know," she said as she put her hands on his thighs. "We'll just have to make them understand that we didn't fail them on purpose. That we tried to kill Sanyi."

"Did we really try all that hard, Azula? I should have done it. I should have-" he choked off, and she sat up on her knees, her arms sliding around his shoulders. She pulled him close, words of comfort crowding on her tongue.

"I'm glad you didn't," said a voice from the window, making them start, pulling apart immediately. Sokka cursed and reached for a knife on his belt. Rian pulled his wide mouth into a grin, flipping a knife in his hand as he lounged on the windowsill. His dark eyes flashed. "What's wrong? You two look like you've seen a ghost."

"Rian..." she started, but he lifted the knife to his lips in a shushing motion.

"Shhh, Princess..." Rian said with amusement lifting the corners of his lips. "This is between me and Tazeo."

And he threw the knife in their direction.