Title: Pretty
Author: Bernarde
Rating: NC-17... my favorite.
Summary: In an underground society where sex does indeed sell, Mark Calaway stumbles across a tortured young man named Evan. A wicked past has left Evan with no memory and the mind of a child, but something about him captures Mark's attention...
-_Ω_-
I can't stop staring at them. Evan pushed against the wall, crying with fear as his lips and neck are devoured with hungry kisses.
"My beloved Evan..." the man purrs, stroking my baby's chest as he nips at that soft neck.
"Please," he whimpers, "Sire!" His back arches and I can see why - teeth sinking into him, blood welling up, and the man sucking hungrily.
I want to stop them, but I can't. I can't move. It feels like my feet are encased in concrete. I try to scream, but nothing comes out. It's like I don't even exist.
Gangrel's hands roam up and down Evan's body, grabbing and groping and Evan is moaning pitifully. He pulls away from Evan's neck, his face a mess of blood, the red liquid trickling down his chin and down Evan's chest.
He lifts Evan's arms and he fights desperately until Gangrel bites him again. Ev goes limp, allowing his arms to be secured to the chains on the wall. When Gangrel releases him, he pulls at them weakly.
"Sire..." he whispers, and Gangrel takes his chin in his hand.
"If only you would not fight me, little one," he says softly, kissing Evan again, "Evan..." He trails his fingers down Evan's bare chest, licking at his collarbone and neck.
Suddenly he rakes his nails against Evan's body, blood blossoming in his wake. Evan moans in pain, twitching, and Gangrel kneels to lap at the wounds.
"Beautiful," he whispers, looking up at the little one, "Such a beautiful boy." He stands, loosening Evan's pants and pulling them down slender hips. He grabs Ev's flaccid manhood, stroking him roughly, trying to get him hard.
"You're going to fight me..." he murmurs as Evan remains soft, "So be it then, child." He slaps Evan across the face hard, and then wraps a hand around his neck, cutting off his air.
Evan starts to writhe, choking desperately and trying to pull away from the monster. Gangrel suddenly reaches up, gives slack to the chains, and turns Evan around, bending him over -
He's going to rape him. I can't watch this. Oh God.
"Sire!" Evan suddenly sobs as he is entered brutally. His whole body goes limp, but Gangrel has a strong hold on his hips, holding Evan tightly as he starts to thrust.
"God in Heaven..." Gangrel pants, sheathing himself entirely in Evan's resisting body, "Like a virgin, Evan... always like the first time..."
"Please!"
"Please what, child? You know you belong to me, now shut up and take what I graciously give you!" Gangrel ends his angered retort with a brutal thrust -
I wake in a frigid sweat.
"Mark," Evan whimpers, pawing at my chest, "Mark." I cuddle him to me without even thinking about it, trying to comfort both him and myself. What the fuck was that? "He hurt me so much, Mark."
"Who did, Evan?" He says nothing in reply, clutching at my hands with his own. I don't make him speak, I just let him quietly whimper while my mind roils. Obviously, he had a nightmare as well... was his similar? 'He hurt me so much'...
"Mark?"
"Yes, baby?" His voice is serious, and he looks up at me with solemn eyes.
"Make him go away. Forever. Please... Make him die." His severity is shocking, demanding, and I feel it in my very bones.
"Make who go away, Evan? Make who die?" I can't help but ask.
"You know exactly who, Mark..."
"No. No, I don't. Was it Raven? Or was it Gangrel?" I feel like I shouldn't be asking this, but I swear that there is a different side to Evan that is starting to show. The things he has said lately, the way he has been acting... Something else in him is awakening. Evan looks up, making eye contact with me, his eyes tearing into my very being.
"Evan will never admit it, Mark. And you know that," he says. He's talking in the third person? Maybe this is that thing which is awakening...?
"But you must tell me," I urge, "I don't know who is the bad guy."
"Yes you do. The minute you laid eyes on Christian, you knew." With that, Evan suddenly goes almost... limp... in my grasp.
"Evan?" I shake him gently, but he doesn't move. What the fuck is going on? "Evan?"
"Wha?" he asks groggily, looking up at me with tired eyes. He... has no memory of what just happened. I can see it.
"... Never mind, baby. Go back to sleep."
"Okay..."
What the fuck? What does Christian have to do with this?
I want to stand up, but suddenly there's a dull throbbing in my leg that reminds me where I am - the hospital. Because Raven shot me.
But... why does Christian matter? The minute I laid eyes on Christian?
He's lovely, with long silky blond hair, dressed nicely in a white shirt and black slacks. He's barefoot. He bows deeply to his master and stays at the door, waiting. "You may come to me," Gangrel says and he walks slowly, humbly, to him. He kneels at Gangrel's feet. "What do you need, child?"
He was so... subservient. Gangrel completely owns him.
Was Evan... or darker Evan... whatever... trying to tell me it was Gangrel? It had to have been.
I fidget, knowing that there is no way in hell I'm getting back to sleep any time soon. Goddamnit. It had to have been Gangrel - everyone is afraid of him. Even Jeff has his inherent fear... that comes and goes.
'Make him die'... Make him die, indeed. Then I will, my beautiful Evan. I would do anything you asked of me. You know it, even if it is only deep down.
Then I will. I will kill Gangrel, for you, my Evan.
-_Ω_-
"I'm not trying to be an ass, Mark, but I'm done with this shit," Glenn shrugs awkwardly.
"I know. I understand," I reply, "Go. Take Shannon and make a new life with him." The big man smiles faintly.
"Will you come back to the company?"
"Maybe some day, I don't know. When I heal up and all this is fucking dealt with."
"Good luck."
"Same to you. Keep in touch?"
"As always. I'll see you around."
"Yeah. See you."
With little ceremony, Glenn is gone, taking Shannon with him. I don't think he told anyone - understandable, considering what happened last time... Will this shit never end?
Evan suddenly ducks in to the room, his shoulders hunched, and he quickly crawls into bed with me.
"What's wrong?" I ask him, but then - the door bursts open again and Jeff enters as well, his face a mess of tears.
"Fuck him, then!" he whimpers, sitting in on of the chairs along the wall and crossing his arms. I raise an eyebrow.
"Jeff?"
"Jeff." The door opens again and there's Matt, holding his hands out.
"Fuck off! Just leave me the goddamn hell alone, Matt!" Jeff's on his feet in a moment, spitting at his brother.
"Jeff, I'm not... please, just listen to me," Matt pleads, "I just..."
"Get. Out. Matt." Jeff's voice is pure poison, his eyes afire. Matt steps back, looks at the floor, sighs and leaves. Within an instant, Jeff goes to the bathroom and shuts the door.
"... What just happened?" I ask Ev, who presses himself to me.
"They're fighting," he replies quietly.
"Why?"
"Because Jeff loves Matt and Matt loves Jeff but Matt thinks that what they're doing is sinful and they're both gonna go to Hell for it and that's bad."
... Ah.
"Where is Raven?"
"Don't know."
"Well, then."
A light knock, and - speak of the devil - Raven peeks his head in. "Hey... they said you could check out any time you want at this point... you're all right."
"Yeah, I know," I grunt, "Guess we'll get that put together then, yeah?"
"Yeah."
-_Ω_-
Evan regards Raven with a wary caution, and he's been at my side ever since I got out of the hospital two weeks ago. We've been lying low, and I'm now on disability, so at least there's some money coming in. Raven is... weird. He's been creeping around, popping up at random and just being unnerving. But he seems nice enough - he's always cooking or doing something around the house. He tries to play with Evan, he really does, but Evan is half-hearted with him at best.
And Matt and Jeff have... not been good. Jeff's been sleeping with me and Evan again, and I guess Matt is sleeping in their old room. I think Raven sleeps where Glenn and Shannon slept, but fuck if I know. He could be sleeping out in a fucking tree or in a hole somewhere - it wouldn't surprise me if he did. He's one weird bird.
"Matthew, please listen to me," I hear Jeff from the other room. Damn it, not again. They've been fighting really badly the last few days in particular. Evan takes the remote from my hand and raises the volume on the television. He really likes this show, but I know he's doing it to drown out Jeff and Matt.
"Mark?" he says.
"What, baby?"
"Will they ever stop fighting?"
"I don't know. Maybe."
He goes still, and quiet. Then he gets up, his movements determined. He's been thinking about this for awhile, I can see it.
"I'll be right back..." he says, kisses me on the cheek, and leaves. I turn the volume on the TV down - I'm not trying to eavesdrop... well, yeah, I guess I am, but... who could blame me?
"Hey," Evan's voice is quiet, almost to the point that I can hear him, "Matt, Rosie... please, both of you..." His voice fades out for a moment.
"I can't deny what we did," Matt's voice, "I can't deny what Jeff and I did... but I can repent. A man shall not lie with another man like he lies with a woman... not to mention his own brother."
"How can you believe in God, with the lives we've lived?" Jeff talking now, "How can you believe in God when you had no choice but to enslave yourself?"
"That was different and you know it," Matthew snarls, "I was homeless, Jeff. Fourteen with nothing, nowhere to go. A few clothes I found in the damn gutter. Don't give me that shit - God was the only thing I had."
"If God is all loving, why would He have done that to you?"
"He was testing me and my devotion to Him."
"So why did you let me love you?"
"I was confused! You were the first person to... to unconditionally love me, Jeff. I saw it in your eyes and..." I hear him choke up, "We've gone over this a thousand times, just please leave me alone... stop torturing me with this..."
I can't help it, I'm getting up and peeking in - they don't see me. Jeff is so close to Matt they're almost touching, Matt has his face turned away and tears streaming down his face. Evan is standing a few feet away, his face a contortion of concern.
Jeff reaches up to brush away Matt's tears, and he pulls away violently, "Jeff... stop. Please stop."
"I can't, Matt, and you know it. I love you and you love me back."
Evan suddenly steps up and touches Matt gently; Jeff steps back as Evan slides his hands under Matt's shirt. Matt stiffens, looking at the smaller man, almost frightened.
"Do you feel your heart beating?" Evan whispers, stilling his hands on Matt's chest.
"Y-yes..."
"You know why your heart is beating?" Evan doesn't wait for an answer, "Because you are alive. And you are human. Do you know what humans do, Matty? They love. Love is never a sin, Matty... never." He leans in and Matt tries to pull away, but Evan cups his face in his small hands and touches their lips together gently. Matt really does attempt to push Evan off, but Evan holds him tighter.
He releases Matt then, who just stares at him with shocked brown eyes.
"I know you felt it," Evan whispers, "Tell me you didn't. I dare you."
Matt's lip trembles and he says nothing. Evan smiles, then gestures to Jeff.
"Look at him and tell me, tell me right now, that you don't love him. That you don't want to be with him for the rest of your lives. That this truly is wrong in your soul." Matt looks at the floor for a moment, then at Jeff, his eyes so thoroughly sad that I just want... to do something. Anything.
"... I can't," Matt says in a broken voice, "I can't."
"I know you can't, Matty... I can see it in you. Why are you fighting this so much?"
"Because of God," he whispers. Evan comes close to Matt again, hovering before him, and leans in and kisses him on the cheek.
"No, not God. You are speaking of humans, Matty... of the Bible. The Bible was not written of God's word. The Bible we have today was written by power hungry men who had eyes only for their greed. God wants you to love whomever you choose - so long as that love is pure, it is good."
These words spilling from Evan's lips no doubt shock all of us. What happened to the innocent Evan, to be replaced now by this spiritual creature? I'm not upset, just... surprised...
"Hell does not await you for loving your brother, Matt," Evan finishes, and he looks at Jeff, "It doesn't await any of us for the love we share..."
Matt looks at Evan incredulously, then at his brother, and then rushes to Jeff. He scoops the Rose in his arms, kissing him chastely and hugging him so tightly. Jeff laughs, the most angelic and happy of sounds, and kisses Matt back.
Evan is suddenly before me, a small smile on his face. He takes my hand and pushes me back through the door.
"Quit peeking on them, silly!"
And he's back to his cherubic self. Strange. But... I hear Matt and Jeff laughing together and whatever unease I may have had vanishes. It must have been the... other Evan. The Evan that is, slowly but surely, coming back. Recovering and coming back from the ashes that Gangrel left him in. Like a phoenix.
That's actually a pretty perfect comparison. Evan as a phoenix... Born again from the ashes to rise stronger than ever before.
"Mark?"
"Yeah, baby?" I sit back down on the couch.
"I love you!"
"I love you too, my little phoenix."
"What?"
"You're my little phoenix," I ruffle his hair as he climbs onto my lap and hugs me, "Because you always come back, no matter what."
-_Ω_- Reviews are greatly appreciated -_Ω_-