(*J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!
*Thanks everyone for reading, and I'm really glad you enjoyed last chapter!)
Teddy invited me over today, which is good, because I need some time to talk to someone outside of my family. There really wasn't anything else for me to do today anyway. Dad's at work, Hugo and Rose are spending the weekend with Ron before he leaves for Romania, and Mum took Scorpius to the Museum of Quidditch so he wouldn't be bored all day. He almost burst with excitement when she offered.
I open the door to Teddy's bedroom and my mouth drops open. Holden is sitting on his bed. It isn't until now that I realize that this was probably a set-up to make us speak to each other. It's in Teddy's nature to do something like that. It isn't that I don't want to speak to Holden, but I'm sure it's the other way around.
"Isobelle, hi," Teddy says casually. Holden immediately turns around. We lock eyes for a moment, but he turns away first. I can't even explain the bad feeling in my stomach when he does this.
"Teddy..." I mutter in return, for lack of anything else to say. He gives me a weird look.
"So, I take it you two aren't on speaking terms?" He guesses. Holden gives him a scathing glance.
"Sod off, Teddy. Look, I have to go," he lies. Holden can't really be that mad at me, can he? I mean, all those times he told me he liked me, and he said he still does, but he doesn't even want to be around me? I don't understand.
"No, you don't. This is stupid, you two need to resolve this. I mean, you obviously like each other, and you're letting one argument get in the way?" Teddy questions. I'm thinking the same thing.
"You don't know anything about it," Holden mumbles, still avoiding my gaze. Teddy shrugs.
"You're right, and I don't want to. That's why you two are going to work it our yourselves."Teddy stands up and opens the door. "See you, later." I hear him mutter something which I can only guess is a locking charm, because I hear all the locks in the door click as Teddy walks off. Great, I'm locked in a room with Holden, and he doesn't even want to speak to me. This is great, just great. Cautiously, I sit down beside Holden on Teddy's bed. He doesn't turn away or anything, but he doesn't look at me either.
"I'm sorry," I apologize quietly. It seems like I've been apologizing a lot lately. I have the urge to reach out and touch Holden, but I don't want him to shrug me off. It's a long while before he even looks at me.
"Okay," he mutters. I don't know what he means by 'okay' because it isn't really an acception, but it isn't an apology either.
"Really, I am. I shouldn't have ever said what I said about Mum, and I shouldn't have spoken to you the way I did. I really am sorry, and I don't want you to hate me-"
"I don't," Holden tells me. Well, he sure isn't acting like he likes me right about now, either.
"You don't?" I ask in disbelief. Holden shakes his head.
"No."
"Then why won't you speak to me?"
"I am." I sigh. That isn't what I meant, this isn't a conversation.
"You're giving me one-word answers. We aren't really talking," I point out.
"What should I say, then?" He asks. I hope I'm not always as stubborn as he's being. That could really get annoying.
"You could accept my apology, for one," I tell Holden.
"I do." I decide not to let his reluctance to speak stop what I have to say.
"It really upset me when you said what you said to me. You know how I feel about my family. That wasn't right of you to compare me to them," I tell Holden gently, so as not to upset him.
"I'm sorry," Holden apologizes. For a long while, we just look at each other. I don't know what he's thinking.
"To be honest with you, there are a lot of things that I'm trying to sort out right now. I can't promise that I'll always be the most agreeable person, but I'll try. That's all I can do," I say seriously. I hope this is good enough for Holden, because I don't want to lose him, but I don't want to put him in the position where he feels like being with me is more trouble than it's worth.
"That sounds fair," Holden replies. He seems to be warming up a bit, but he isn't completely acting like the Holden I know.
"If you have a problem with it, just tell me. I know I'm not anything ideal, but-"
"That's not true," Holden says.
"What isn't?"
"What you said. I shouldn't have said what I said to you," Holden tells me. That's the most detailed sentence I've gotten out of him so far.
"It's okay. We both said some things that we'd like to take back. And I know it doesn't seem like it, but I really do care about my mum. I care about everyone in my family. And I care about you," I add hesitantly, unable to bring myself to look at Holden. I feel him take my hand, lacing his fingers through mine. I didn't exect him to do that.
"I care about you, too," he replies. I keep wondering if Holden does actually like me, or if he just feels sorry for me. I know that I still shouldn't be worrying over that by now, but I do. I just don't feel good enough for Holden sometimes.
"Are you alright?" Holden asks.
"Yeah," I lie. He looks into my eyes.
"No, you aren't. What's wrong?" I sigh.
"I don't know. It's just... where do we go from here?" Holden knits his eyebrows.
"What do you mean?" The thing is, I don't really know myself. Of course, I'm not expecting any type of serious commitment from Holden, but at the same time, I want to know that Holden doesn't just see me as someone to have fun with over the summer. I just can't take any more abandonment in my life. I also don't want him to waste my time.
"I mean, what do you want? Do you just want to be with me, or do you actually want to be with me? I don't want to get hurt," I explain.
"Do you honestly think that I would do anything to hurt you?" Holden asks. I don't think he's offended by the question, but he really wants to know what I think.
"I don't know. There are a lot of people who I assumed should have been there for me but never were. I just don't want you to be one of them. And I know it's a lot to ask, so if it's too much, I understand." Holden gives me a serious look.
"Look, I wouldn't ever lead you on. All those things I said about how I feel about you are the truth. You're special to me, Belle." Holden squeezes my hand.
"Really?" He nods.
"I'm sorry for being such a git to you," he apologizes.
"You mean an incredibly fit git?" I correct him, smirking. Things feel right between Holden and I now. Tension between us doesn't feel normal at all.
"Yeah, that's what I meant." Holden smiles and leans in to kiss me, running his fingers through my hair. I suppose we're okay now. I'm glad to know that I really do mean something to him, and I'll just have to accept that we're going to have our differences like normal people do. That doesn't mean we don't still like each other. Or maybe I more than like Holden. Holden pulls away and rests his forehead against mine.
"I'm serious," he whispers, grinning at me.
"Serious about what?"
"You," Holden answers. Oh, I really don't know what to say back to that, but I'm glad to hear it. Holden's lips find mine again. Seconds later, he and I turn to look at the door as it opens. Teddy is rolling his eyes with an annoyed look on his face. I don't know what he has to be so mad about. He wanted Holden and I to speak again, and now we are.
"I know you guys are all made up and stuff now, but can we please keep the snogging to a minimum?" He requests, flopping down in his beanbag chair. "I don't want to lose my lunch."
"Shut it. It was your idea in the first place," I remind Teddy.
"How stupid of me..." He mutters.
"Besides, I can snog Belle if I want to. No one says anything when you're always snogging Victoire," Holden points out.
"That's different," Teddy protests. Holden shakes his head.
"Nope. Not really, mate."
"What's different about it?" I ask. Teddy crosses his arms.
"You two are teaming up on me," he complains.
"That's because you don't have an argument."
"We can't all be Ravenclaws," Teddy points out. I never knew until now what House Holden was in. I'd always assumed he was in the same one as Teddy, considering they're best friends.
"Yeah, but still. You should be happy for us mate." Teddy shrugs.
"Didn't say I wasn't. So, Isobelle, I heard about Aunt Hermione and your dad," Teddy starts, giving me a look. Well, this conversation took a one-eighty.
"You have?" I ask, raising my eyebrows with interest. "Who from?"
"Uncle Harry," he answers. I should have known. Who else would have told him?
"I told you, Belle," Holden mutters. Yes, I suppose he was right about my parents. Holden predicted right, but I was completely blind-sided by it. I guess he's smarter than I give him credit for.
"So, they get along well, then?" Teddy asks. I nod.
"Well, they do now. Maybe when the newness of it all wears off, they'll have some arguments here and there. But, I can already sort of see Dad's ideals and things starting to change. And Scorpius loves Mum to death," I add. Teddy shakes his head playfully at the thought of my little brother.
"He loves everyone, doesn't he?" Teddy asks. It seems like it.
"Yeah, the kid's the friendliest thing ever," Holden adds.
"Yes, well Mum really enjoys him, too. She's brilliant with him, actually."
"Well, what about you and Aunt Hermione?" Teddy asks. Without meaning to, my shoulders tense up. Holden gives me a comforting pat on the back.
"We get on well. I mean, we've had disagreements here and there, but nothing major," I answer. I know Holden and Teddy see Mum completely differently than I ever will. They've known here since they were young, since he was a baby in Teddy's case, yet they still only see her as someone who's nice and level-headed at all times. She's my mother though, and I've seen her in situations that they can't even dream of.
I've also decided not to mention anything of Mum being pregnant to anyone, because it isn't my business to tell. Along with that, I don't really know what her plan is either, so I don't want to ruin it by informing more people than she wants to know.
"That's good," Teddy says. I nod.
"It is, and we've all been spending even more time together since..." Since Astoria got arrested. That reminds me of that terrible nightmare I had. "...nevermind."
"Since what?" Holden asks curiously. I shake my head.
"It's nothing." Teddy gives me that 'see-through-your-soul' look of his.
"No, it's not." Am I really that easy to read?
"It isn't something I should talk about," I say seriously.
"Uncle Harry told me anyway," Teddy responds nonchalantly. It takes me only a second to realize that he probably knows just about everything I do, because he hears things through Uncle Harry. That kind of annoys me. Apparently, privacy is a lost art.
"Should've known," I mutter dejectedly. Holden looks at me understandingly, giving me a weak smile.
"So, what were the two of you arguing about anyway?" Teddy questions.
"Thought you didn't want to know?" Holden retorts, giving him a smug look. Teddy shakes his head.
"I changed my mind," he says simply.
"Did you know that Death Eaters were responsible for the death of Holden's aunt?" I inform Teddy bitterly. I see Holden staring at me out of the corner of my eye.
"Way to be blunt," he says sarcastically. Teddy gives Holden a look. It's obvious he didn't know.
"Really?" Holden nods.
"Yeah, my dad's sister," he answers. "I never met her, though."
"Why didn't you tell me?" Teddy questions. Holden shrugs.
"Because it never really came up in conversation. Besides, I know your family hasn't exactly had the best history with Death Eaters either," he explains knowingly. Hearing Holden and Teddy talk about how their families have been ruined by Death Eaters makes me feel like a terrible person. It's because I know that my family was a large part of that, directly on Teddy's behalf. It's even more odd to think that even though Teddy and I come from the same family, my dad fought on a different side of the war than his parents did.
"Isn't that the truth," Teddy mumbles, a dark look crossing his face.
"But, you guys have it worse off than I do," Holden reasons.
"That isn't true." How can he think that? A member of his family is dead because of Death Eaters. Whether or not that has anything to do particularly with my family, I don't know. But still. Really, I'm only ever judged because of my Death Eater family line. I have to admit that I hate it, but when put in the perspective of death, it really isn't that bad.
"Yeah, it's like everyone makes these decisions about us without not even knowing who we are," Teddy adds, looking thoroughly annoyed. Having such close ties with Harry Potter has definitely landed Teddy a lot of recognition. There's nothing more irritating than having a slanderous article published about your family in the Daily Prophet. I know that because the Malfoys have been on the receiving end of them quite a few times, especially when there were so many speculations as to who my mother was, and now partly because of Dad's annulment from Astoria. It seems like Dad can't escape the public eye, which is far less glamorous than one might think.
I lay my head on Holden's shoulder, finding his presence quite comforting. I can't imagine how I would have felt had we never reconciled. "It's annoying, but I suppose it only matters if you decide to think it's true," I suggest, saying that for both Teddy's comfort and mine.
"Guess you're right," Teddy says. "Well, that's enough that depressing shite for the day. What should we do now?" Holden shrugs.
"Ow!" How many times is he going to do that?
"Sorry." Holden mutters an apology and kisses my forehead. "I can't believe school starts in a few weeks," he complains. I've been so consumed in everything that's happened this summer that I haven't really thought about school. It seems so petty considering what I've been through.
"Hogwarts is a boarding school, though. After you leave, I won't see the two of you again until Christmas Holiday," I say sadly, the thought of it just dawning on me. I think I'll go crazy without Holden and Teddy for four entire months.
"There's always Hogsmeade trips," Teddy tells me.
"Hogsmeade trips?" I ask in question.
"We're allowed out to Hogsmeade a couple weekends of the year. Well, every weekend if you're in Sixth Year like we are," Holden informs me.
"Oh. I didn't know you were allowed outside of the castle."
"It's school, not prison," Teddy smirks.
"So, you're going to have to come to Hogsmeade and visit us," Holden adds, giving me a playful smile.
"Yeah, definitely," I assure them both. Like I said, I'm going to go crazy without them.
When I come home, my family is in the living room, Mum included. She's sitting on the sofa with Scorpius in her lap, and they're reading a book together. I think it's the most touching thing ever. Dad is reading something of his own, but I see him glancing at Mum and Scorpius every few seconds. Maybe I'm crazy, but I think I saw him smile once.
"Hi, Ithbelle!" Scorpius greets casually, looking up at me and smiling as I sit down in the chair by the fireplace.
"Hey, Scor. Did you have fun today?" Scorpius nods excitedly.
"Yeah! We saw all the quidditch stuff, and I even got to touch some of the brooms!" He exclaims, grinning widely. "Miss Haminey and I had a lot of fun today, right Miss Haminey?" Mum smiles and nods back at Scorpius.
"We absolutely did, Scorpius. Isobelle, did you tell Harry and Ginny I said hello?" She questions. I nod.
"Course I did."
"Did you have a good time at Harry's?"
"Yes. I spoke to Teddy and Holden for a bit," I answer.
"Did the two of you resolve your argument, then?" Mum questions. I nod and I can feel the dumb smile forming on my face.
"Argument?" Dad asks, looking up at me for the first time. I almost forgot he was in the room, and I don't like to speak to him about Holden as freely as I do with Mum.
"Yeah, it was stupid, really," I admit. Dad looks like he doesn't believe me.
"Would this have anything to do with what you asked me the other night?" he questions, referring back to when I asked him about Holden's aunt. I shake my head. I really don't want to start this conversation right now.
"Not really."
"Then what else would you have to argue about?" He questions accusingly, giving me a stern look.
"Nothing. People argue, Dad. That doesn't mean that Holden's a bad person," I tell him.
"Yeah, Holden's nice," Scorpius agrees, giving me the thumbs up. "He likes the Falcons like me, Daddy."
"Does he, Scorpius?" Dad asks conversationally. Scorpius nods.
"Yep."
"Well, then it's a pity that we can't choose our romantic partners based on their quidditch preferences, isn't it?" Dad questions, looking dead at me. Scorpius looks confused at Dad's question, not aware that it wasn't directed at him.
"Draco," Mum says quietly. "He's a very nice young man."
"You met him at the charity ball," I remind Dad. Granted, that didn't go as planned, but it didn't go terribly either. Holden was very polite.
"I did, but might I remind you that I don't really know anything about him beyond his name," Dad points out. That isn't my fault.
"Which is reason enough for you not to dislike him already," I counter.
"I'll continue to dislike Holden until he gives me a reason not to," Dad tells me. "It's my job." I groan. Is he serious?
"I thought your job was at the Ministry of Magic?" Scorpius questions. Mum smiles at his cuteness.
"It is, but this is a symbolic type of job, Scorpius," Dad explains.
"Oh. I'm not never going to get a job, unless it's quidditch," Scorpius decides.
"You'll have to get a job eventually, Scorpius," Dad informs him. Scorpius shakes his head.
"Nuh-uh, because we have lots of money," Scorpius points out. Dad shakes his head.
"That's where you're incorrect, mate. I have money. I'm afraid you're flat broke," Dad informs him. Scorpius pouts.
"Why do you work anyway, Draco? I've always wondered why anyone in your family ever had a job," Mum questions. Honestly, I've wondered the same thing.
"What example would I be setting if I sat on my arse all day doing nothing? I want my children to know the value of hard work and what comes with it," Dad answers. That's rich coming from a man who could buy up half of Wizarding England if he wanted to.
"So, when we inherit our money, we're free to sit on our arses doing nothing?" I ask smartly. The day I turn seventeen, I'm set up to inherit over fifty million galleons. I can't wait.
"You can do whatever you want," Dad assures me. "But keep in mind that you won't get a knut from me if you blow it all."
"Until you die," I point out. "Not that that's wishful thinking or anything." Dad rolls his eyes.
"I don't see why money's so important to either of you. Wouldn't you rather know the feeling of accomplishment when you earn your own money?" Mum asks, looking at Scorpius and I. We shake our heads.
"No." Mum sighs.
"That's terrible. Draco's really doing a good thing for both of you, and you're not even trying to take it in. You know, there are a lot of less-fortunate children who would love to have a fraction of what you do," She tells us both. Of course, I'm aware that less fortunate families exist, such as the Weasleys, but it doesn't cross my mind often. My family very rarely interacts with others that are of less status than we are. I don't mean that in a bad way, but in the Wizarding World, social circles very rarely overlap.
"We know that, Mum. We're very thankful for what we have," I assure her. Scorpius nods and looks up at Mum.
"Yeah, we're thankful," he adds. Mum just doesn't understand how things work for pureblooded families, with the exception of me. It would practically be considered a scandal if Scorpius and I weren't handed the best of everything without a second thought.
"No, actually you aren't," Dad realizes. "Scorpius, where is that new Firebolt I bought you just a few days ago?" Scorpius purses his lips in thought.
"Um...I think it's somewhere, Daddy," he answers, proving Dad's point.
"Exactly. And Isobelle, it seems that you get new sets of robes every other day," Dad tells me.
"That's different, Dad," I protest. "I can't go walking around naked, can I?"
Dad shakes his head, "No, but that certainly doesn't mean that you need as many clothes as you have. Some things are going to begin to change around here." That isn't fair. Mum's bought me a lot of my clothes, too.
"Dad, you've got a lot of stuff as well," I point out.
"Yeah, you do." Scorpius nods his head in agreement.
"Well, when the pair of you have a job that pays like mine, then you can criticize the way I spend my money as much as you would like. I believe that's fair, what do you think, Hermione?" Is Dad honestly asking Mum to agree with him on the matter?
"I think that's perfectly fair, Draco." Something gives me the impression that even if Mum didn't fancy Dad, she'd still be agreeing with him on this.
"Don't you like us, Miss Haminey?" Scorpius questions. Mum nods her head vehemently.
"Of course, I like you, Scorpius, which is why I agree with your father," Mum tells him. Scorpius doesn't look convinced.
"When Mummy agrees with Daddy like that, I'm in trouble," he says sadly. Mum gives him a sympathetic look.
"You aren't in any sort of trouble, Scorpius," she promises him. "I'm only agreeing with Draco because I love you, and I want to make sure that you turn out to be a very good boy and behave well."
"I behave all the time except sometimes when I'm mean to Ithbelle, but I don't try to be mean because Daddy says we should always behave our very best. I don't behave bad on purpose, but Mummy said that's why she doesn't love me because I behave bad and I don't want you to be like her," Scorpius tells her in one frantic breath. I wish I could tell Scorpius that his psychotic bitch of a mother's finally in Azkaban where she belongs, but Dad said that it's best he doesn't know that. Mum gives Scorpius a serious look, as if she's looking at Rose or Hugo.
"Scorpius, I wouldn't ever say something so cruel to you. And your father is right, you should always try to be on your best behavior, but even if you aren't, that won't cause any of us to stop loving you," she assures him. Scorpius appears to be immensely relieved to hear this, and I can see hope shining behind his slate grey eyes. It's so depressing to think that at only five, Scorpius feels as rejected as he does. However, it's pleasing at the same time to see Mum step up and be the mother to Scorpius that he never really had.
"I love you too, Miss Haminey. But how come if you're Ithbelle's mummy, you weren't with her when she was little?" Scorpius asks. For some reason, I've been waiting for this question to come up. As curious as Scorpius is, it was bound to happen.
"Now, Scorpius, that isn't a polite question to ask," Dad chastises gently, trying to save Mum from having to sate his wonder.
"Why not?" The expression on Scorpius' face is purely innocent, and it makes me feel kind of bad that he doesn't understand.
"It's fine, Draco. Erm, Scorpius, things were very complicated between your father and I-"
"Daddy says that word a lot of times and I know it means that you can't tell me the real answer. It's okay though, because you're never gonna leave again, right?" Scorpius questions apprehensively. Scorpius just went from one uncomfortable question to another. It must be some kind of talent of his. Mum and Dad look at each other, trying to silently communicate what her answer should be. Technically, Mum will always be here. She's my mother. But I think Scorpius is asking whether or not she and Dad will always be together, which comes down to how serious Mum and Dad are.
"No, Scorpius. I'm never going to leave," Mum answers solidly. Scorpius grins and gives her a hug.
"Kay. Then you should sleep in the room next to mine, because then when I get scared at night, I don't have to walk all the way to Daddy's room. It's a long way," Scorpius explains. I can see Mum and Dad inwardly kicking themselves. "Or you and Daddy can share a room, I forgot you're supposda do that if you're grownups."
"Scorpius, that wasn't what Miss Hermione meant," Dad tells him, avoiding looking at Mum. I'm sure he's a bit embarrassed. Scorpius looks crestfallen.
"But, Miss Haminey slept over last night. Miss Haminey, you're not staying over again tonight?" He asks disappointedly. Mum shakes her head.
"I'm sorry, Scorpius, but I've got to return to my own home," She apologizes softly.
"But, I want you to stay here," Scorpius pleads. "I like you as a Mummy, and you're Ithbelle's Mummy, and Daddy says he likes you like boyfriend and girlfriend like each other, and that's a very special like." Mum's face flushes a bit when Scorpius tells her this.
"Yes, I agree that it is very special. Can you do tricks on your broom?" She asks randomly. I'm not sure what this has to do with anything, but Scorpius nods anyway.
"Yeah, I can do lots of really cool tricks, and I can even fly upside-down!" He responds excitedly.
"I thought so. But, you wouldn't have ever learned to do any of that if you never learned how to fly your broom in the first place, right?" Mum points out. "It's the same with your father and I. We can't rush into anything before we even know how to get on with each other. Does that make sense?" Scorpius nods.
"Yeah, I think so. So, if I teach you how to fly upside-down on my broom, you can come live with me and Ithbelle and Daddy?" He questions hopefully. Mum puts her palm to her forehead and smiles tiredly.
"Sort of, Scorpius. It is a bit difficult to understand, I agree," Mum tells him.
"Yeah, kinda. Ithbelle, do you understand?" I nod.
"Yes, I understand it Scorpius. It's like making new friends. You don't invite them to your house before you know if they're nice or not, do you?" Scorpius shakes his head.
"No, but I already know that Miss Haminey is very nice! And Daddy already invited her over lots of times," Scorpius reminds me. Merlin, this kid is too brilliant for analogies. Or maybe ours just aren't very good.
"Look, Scorpius, you can like someone and that doesn't mean that they have to live with you," Dad attempts to explain. Scorpius seems to comprehend this best.
"Like how Ithbelle and Holden like each other, but they don't live together?" He asks. Oh, this should be interesting.
"Yes... like that..." Dad mutters, and irritated expression crossing his face. Scorpius' face lights up like he's thought of a brilliant idea.
"Well, then maybe Holden should live here, because he can already fly a broom," Scorpius suggests. Merlin, kill me now.
"No!" Both Mum and Dad say quickly. Scorpius seems perplexed beyond words.
"But Ithbelle and Holden are boyfriend and girlfriend..." As stupid as it sounds, I haven't really ever thought of Holden as my boyfriend. Not that I don't feel that way about him, I just never thought to give it a title.
"Yes, but they're also still children, which makes that highly inappropriate," Mum informs him.
"So it's not inappropriate for you to live with Daddy?" He questions. I sigh. This is going in circles.
"Technically speaking, no. But, Scorpius, we've gone over this already. You're going to see me tomorrow for dinner, anyway," Mum reminds him. What? When did this come about?
"Tomorrow?" I ask. Dad nods.
"Yes. Isobelle, since Rose and Hugo will be spending the weekend with their father, I thought Hermione might like to join us for dinner tomorrow evening," Dad informs me.
"Oh." Now, it isn't that I don't want Mum over, it's just that something tells me that this isn't going to go too well. It would just be too good to be true.
*(So, I think I'm a day behind on the update, but I've been really busy since Monday, so I apologize for that. Also, I'm aware that the past two chapters have been short, but that's pretty much in preparation for next chapter. So, yeah, Isobelle and Holden made up, and Hermione is changing the family (for the better, I might add), and Scorpius is the biggest Dramione shipper in the world. So, yes, I'm very excited for next chapter, I think it'll be fun! Thanks for reading and leave a review!)