Wrote this in a hurry but if there's to many mistakes I might go back and fix this. Anyway this update is largely thanks to the reviewers you guys encourage me a lot;p Well in between my last year of HS, gaming, reading other peoples fanfics and real life guess I'm impressed I updated so soon. Well enjoy;p
CH25
I don't like it here I really don't. It's always cold no matter how much I pull the covers up. And I don't want to ask for another blanket really, because my master doesn't scare me. She's just so calm all the time sometimes I wonder if she's alive or one of those holo portraits they have in the archive rooms.
An whenever I do something wrong she just stares me down all deathly still until I apologize an I'm trying to be good but can't you see I just can't meditate properly! And it's not my fault I hit Padawan Hett he shouldn't have been making fun of me! And he's weird an all cause he sais he's a Tusken but he's human I saw his eyes. Master Nas sais I'll get used to it but I don't get why Jedi meditate so much I really don't I mean is it really that hard to see who needs help? We went on a field trip today and we finally got to leave the temple to visit a exh-ib-ition or whatever they call it and on the way I saw a poor woman an she had a baby an she reminded me of mom and me and I wanted to help her but Master Kaya sort of just walked past her like she didn't see her and all but I know she did! I thought Jedi were supposed to be protectors of the galaxy how can they save anyone if they can't take care of even one planet?
And I miss Obi Wan he's the only one who gets me. He's always there for me and when I need to talk he'll listen. An he's a lot like Qui Gon except according to him Qui Gon takes on a lot of pathetic life form projects but never finishes them I hope he didn't mean I was one but I haven't seen him around much maybe he's on a mission but he didn't tell me anything so how would I know? An Obi Wan tells me all kinds of awesome things us "kids" aren't supposed to know and he's got the most wizard torture stories their all nice and gory an he said that I'm free and the Jedi can say what they want but I'm a free person now. So I can technically go where I want. He even asked me to make a holo for him all special an all so I did he liked it allot I could tell. I wish the other masters appreciated me more I'm really trying so hard for them to like me but I don't think they do I guess it's okay though cause one day I'm going to go free my mom and nothing's going to stop me.
Wait I, I don't feel that good. Wow that doesn't feel good at all. An I'm sick all over the floor and I keep saying I'm sorry but Master Nas just starts cleaning and tells me to use the fresher an I don't know what happened back there I was meditating an all like I was supposed to and then suddenly I felt something very wrong and unhealthy like that time I saw a half dead flea ridden Ack next to Watto's shop and I knew to stay away from it cause it gave me this twisted feeling in my gut.
I scrub my face with water, they have a ton of it here in the temple, but suddenly I don't feel so good again and Master holds me so I can puke and I keep puking into the sink. An I don't get what's wrong with me I was fine before meditating just a little angry at Hett for calling me a bantha turd an now I've meditated an I'm sick. So wouldn't it have been better if I skipped the meditating part and just stood in a corner like mom made me stand when I used those huttese words she says I'm not supposed to know? And I really really miss her. Master is wiping my face and telling me to calm down but I can't because the twisty feeling is back but I've just emptied out like all of dinner an maybe some lunch to so my stomach is empty so I just sorta make a hideous retching noise. Ans I guess I should be thankful that its empty cause masters dragging me somewhere by the hand. I hear the word healers but I'm not sick I just need a moment. Ans I don't want to be dragged around the academy like a baby cause then Hett can make fun of that too.
The room is big but I'm too busy being sick to be awed at how clean an nice it is and Master Che is saying something an she puts her hand on my forehead an I feel a lot better. She wanted to know if I want to stay overnight for observation or something but I just wana go back to my room so Master Nas takes me back and I go to my room. They're talking in now in what they think is hushy noises but I can hear them cause I'm not sleeping. They say something about force vision or overreaction or stress or something, I guess they're not sure themselves but I'm not stressed out really I just really want my mom right now. She would tuck me in and tell me a funny story which usually made no sense because mom would keep forgetting all the names all the time or she would sing a song for me many were in a language she didn't know cause she learned them from her mom who learned it from hers an stuff. She said they were songs about happy things but they sounded sad an reminded me of desert nights a lot slow empty an howling sadly but always there sort of like Obi wan except he's not here now. An mom would make me warm milk sometimes when she wasn't tired cause she had to take care of the slaves all day and she would rub my back and say I'd get better and she hope I'd be free one day but I knew she didn't believe it cause she would cry sometimes. She thought I was asleep but I wasn't an I heard her an that's when I knew that I had to have hope for the both of us an now I'm here an she's not. I don't feel sick that much but I don't feel that much better either I hope Obi Wan will come back soon an I hope that one day I can free mom I suddenly feel very tired so I start falling asleep. I guess that means a lot of waiting to free mom but I guess it's okay because after I free her I'm going to free everyone else and show the Jedi what they should have been doing instead of meditating.