Chapter 25

« … » Benedictus felt trapped. While they were walking across his native village, the village he always liked when he was little, he began to think if that was really a good idea. Even if Misao walked next to him, he could still feel this kind of weird sensation…He didn't know what it was precisely…

That was kind of fear….that was an emotion like that he had…Misao glanced at him from the corner of her eye, and could see the bunch of flowers Benedictus carried into his arms seemed to be too heavy for him. After all, he didn't come here since…He preferred not thinking about it. That seemed he was afraid of…Of what, by the way?

He didn't know.

Around them, the sky was grey and cloudy…A common sky in winter's time. And in front of them, Benedictus could understand that being in a village enclosed next to Elbrouz mountains didn't make weather better. But he didn't care…

Misao ended up by saying to him:

"Is there something wrong?"

"…these kinds of places are always…"

Misao wasn't really accustomed as well, so she believed in him. However, even if she felt Benedictus was truly ill at ease, she couldn't just but recall to him:

"…I know that's hard but…you have to and you know it."

Benedictus didn't answer but just nodded. He was agreed with her. No matter what…he must do it…He had to do it.

That's why he moved there after all…

Walking faster, he held the bunch of flowers which buried his face tighter. Benedictus took care of buying favorite flowers of Scholastica. And roses were difficult to find in this time but they managed to find some. With Misao who guided him, they headed for the graveyard.

"…Misao?"

"Yes?" Misao turned toward him. Benedictus felt a bit awkward to ask something like that to her, but he felt forced to ask.

"…What will I say...when I will be in front of her?"

Misao was surprised but she somehow expected this kind of question. Without stopping, she just said:

"…Your deep thought. That only matters."

Benedictus frowned.

"It doesn't help me a lot…"

Misao just shrugged. Actually she didn't know either. As they arrived to graveyard's entrance, Misao told him to be quiet now. Benedictus nodded, looking apparently determined.

However, Misao stopped. Benedictus didn't understand then turned his head toward her, surprised.

"What's wrong? Why did you stop?"

Misao didn't answer. She just stared straight ahead her, open-mouthed. Benedictus didn't really understand and managed to move the bunch of flower in order to see what disturbed her. Then suddenly, he understood what's happening.

"…"

That wasn't rare to see others people in a graveyard and Benedictus knew it very well. However, in front of the graveyard's entrance, they met…a rather strange visitor that they didn't expect to see at all…And Benedictus was so surprised that he nearly let the bunch of flowers drop but he managed to keep into his hands, without hiding his surprised look.

Before them…there was Johanna. There was Johanna herself, the Pope of Index who stood up in front of them. When she saw them, she stayed quiet during some seconds then greeted them.

"Good day…"

Benedictus didn't answer, too shocked for answering. However, Misao put an arm in front of him, as if she wanted to protect him if something wrong happened. However, Johanna didn't react to this, and just smiled to them.

"I don't have any ill intentions. I will not attack you."

She talked with her calm, cold tone which made both of them shivers. As they stayed silent, she kept talking:

"I was waiting for you."

Benedictus didn't react but Misao just asked her with a suspicious look:

"What do you mean? Why are you there..."

Even if she wasn't from Index, she was still disturbed by her look herself. Johanna just closed her eyes, keeping her enigmatic smile she always had. Finally she declared:

"God answered to me…"

Misao wondered if she must take her swords out now but she finally thought better of it. On the other hand, Benedictus was divided between the idea of attacking her even if he knew he didn't have any chance in or running away from her. Finally he just decided to listen what she wanted to mean until the very end.

"…God…allowed her to come back. God answered to me and allowed her to come back during this only time."

"What do you…?" Misao wanted to say but finally she didn't end her sentence, not understanding what she meant. Johanna paused then went on.

"However, she doesn't have a lot of time left before disappearing again…And this time, she would leave for the good…and you wouldn't see her anymore."

"…" Benedictus and Misao glanced at each other, confused by her saying. What did she mean? Was she…testing them, as she always did with everyone?

Johanna then moved, as if she allowed them to pass. She then said:

"She is waiting for you…She is waiting for the two she cares the most about."

Benedictus didn't know if he must obey or not. He glanced at Misao again, waiting for his reaction. Misao stayed unmoved during some seconds then finally moved forward. Benedictus stayed skeptical but he ended up by following her at last, trying to avoid Johanna's glance focused on them.

"…Her words…" Misao repeated, completely confused by them.

Benedictus nodded as they walked toward Scholastica's grave. He tried to give some logic in her mystery but finally he decided to drop it.

"Johanna always had been creepy…it didn't surprise me if…"

Suddenly he stopped when he saw from far a small shape, near the place where there was his sister's grave. He frowned.

"What's the meaning of…"

Misao took a surprised look. Then finally they moved forward the person who didn't notice them. However more they approached, more this shape was familiar to them. When they finally arrived next to the grave, where the name of Scholastica was written in, Benedictus finally called the person:

"…Hey!"

To his voice, the person moved and turned back toward them.

When Benedictus saw her face and her look for the first time, he thought he hallucinated and that was a kind of illusion showed. However, as she didn't disappear and even made a smile to them, Benedictus dropped the bunch of flowers he had in his hands which fell on the floor then stared at her, open-mouthed.

"…No…it can't be…"

Misao next to him was as confused and stunned as he was. She didn't understand either…She didn't know if that was some mystification of Johanna or another thing…but it seemed that was truly real…

In front of them, there was Scholastica standing up. In front of their shocked reactions, she just smiled to them.

"…Scholastica….?" Benedictus repeated, aghast. "Is…that you?"

Scholastica smiled sadly to them. She looked like if she had her old body…She seemed to be like the spirit she always seemed to be before…before she had this new body. However, to her brother's reaction, she unexpectedly began to talk:

"Brother…Misao…I'm so happy to see you…"

Both Benedictus and Misao shivered to this. Scholastica never talked before and never had the ability to do…now she talked with her own voice…not by any gestures or thoughts…Her voice…sounded kind and sweet, as natural as a normal child. Scholastica, as the two stayed silent completely aghast by her reappearance, went on:

"…I…I'm so happy to see you again…"

Benedictus opened her mouth but no sounds came from his mouth…then without any other answer he fell down to his knees. He didn't…He felt some tears covering his eyes…He knew now…There was something in these tears…That was joy…Joy that he admitted now…

His sister…came back.

"Scholastica…" He just repeated feeling his tears rolling on his cheek. Misao contemplated her as well, looking like she was nearly about to break down as well. Scholastica just watched them with all care and sweetness she always had alive:

"I'm sorry. …I'm so sorry for…having left both you behind…"

"…" Misao didn't respond but Scholastica went on:

"I…caused you so much suffering since my passing…I'm so sorry."

"….What…do you…mean…Scholas…" Benedictus stammered. His voice cracked with tears in. Scholastica looked down.

"I caused you…so much pain and sadness…I did exactly the same mistake as I was alive…I always was such a burden for everyone…So…for all of this, I'm sorry."

Misao was about to reply something but Benedictus didn't leave her time enough to answer and leaped in order to run toward his younger sister, nearly stumbling and without any other gesture, he drew her close to him and hugged her tightly. Scholastica was kind of surprised by his attitude but finally smiled and hugged him back. Misao, seeing them, stayed behind and looked them from the sidelines, thinking they apparently wanted to be together for this moment.

"…Brother…"

"I'm sorry!" Benedictus cried out, avoiding tears on his cheeks. "I'm so…I'm so sorry, Scholastica! I…I'm so sorry for everything!"

"…" Scholastica didn't answer but Benedictus just hugged her tighter.

"I…You never…had been the burden to me…Actually…That was me…the burden to you…I'm so sorry! I've been…I've been such a bad brother toward you, Scholastica!"

"Brother…you don't…"

"No! I'm such…an idiot…I always…" He paused, trying to take some breath. "..I always treated you so poorly…I'm so sorry…If…I didn't suggest you…If I didn't suggest you to get this body…nothing would have happened…and you would be still…"

Scholastica stopped him by tenderly caressing his hair and buried her head into his shoulder, avoiding tears which fell on her hair.

"I never blamed you…Brother…You must believe in me…I always understood your pain and everything you came through. So I never held it against you…"

Benedictus felt if he didn't hold Scholastica like that, he would fell down again. However her sentences didn't make him better.

"…How…can you say that?...Tell me…I always treated you so poorly…I always bullied you and after everything I did to you…just for my own selfish pleasure…How do you still have the strength to forgive me?"

He never really expressed it before but now he wanted to express it. He had the wish to express his deep thought…Scholastica caressed his back now.

"…Brother…I know you…you didn't only do some bad things to me…We had good times together too, after all. We're siblings…"

"…Scholastica…" Benedictus just repeated but Scholastica cut him off.

"…that's in nature of siblings to argue and have bad moments at times…You don't have to blame yourself…No matter what, you are still my brother."

"…" Benedictus felt his heart stopping then clenched his teeth under tears. He could do nothing but just hug his sister with all the deep affection he always had…

Scholastica enjoyed this moment and familiar contact she held dear. When she opened her eyes again, she saw Misao as well then began to move away slightly from her brother.

"Misao…"

Misao started with surprise. Benedictus growled, not wanting to let her go away from him but finally obeyed. Scholastica came closer to her and realized Misao's face was covered from tears who ran down on her face, even if she seemed to be calmer than Benedictus. Scholastica then stretched her arms toward her that Misao welcomed with care and hugged her as well.

"…I missed you." Scholastica just said.

"…I missed you too…" Misao then replied, hugging her tenderly back.

For these two, words meant nothing. Gestures meant however everything. Scholastica buried her face in her chest, enjoying her warm contact. She then asked to Misao:

"…Misao…Can you…?"

"Hm?" Misao muttered.

"…Can you please…show me…how to make one again?"

Misao understood now what she meant. She then moved away from Scholastica then nodded as for response. She then took the paper towel she kept from the bar where she was. She didn't know if that was enough to make one origami but Scholastica seemed to be satisfied with. So Misao began to fold it, now inspired to make one now. Misao must have recalled it for so long…Inspiration made everything easier and better…Even if she didn't practice for a long time…She began to gradually find her touch again. And when she finally managed to make this paper towel under the form of a crane, Scholastica smiled with joy.

"That's the best you ever did, Misao." Scholastica said.

"…Do you want me to give it to you?"

Scholastica happily nodded, touched by this care then stretched her hand in order to hold it. She then said to Misao:

"…Thanks, Misao…I will take care of it…"

Misao nodded but managed to smile through her tears. However, Benedictus who watched the scene, goggled when he noticed something.

"…Scholastica…Your body…"

Misao also realized that Scholastica's appearance gradually vanished, and she began to fade away. Benedictus reminisced Johanna's words. "She would leave for good…"

"Scholastica!"

Scholastica took a sad look when she recalled it. She then said:

"…I'm out of time…I'm sorry. I could only come back for these brief moments…"

Misao covered her mouth with her hand, realizing she would see her disappear again.

"No…" Benedictus shook his head. "No! I don't want!"

Seeing Scholastica's appearance which faded away Benedictus knew he would lose her again. And this time for the good. He knew he would never see her again…Until the day where he…

Scholastica however, didn't seem to be disturbed as they were. She even smiled to them with joy:

"But that's alright…I don't have any regret…I could see both of you one very last time in order to enjoy these happy moments with you again…I could tell you what I wanted…"

"What do you mean?" Benedictus took his face into his hands again, ignoring tears coming from more plentiful than before…

"I don't want you to lose into grief as you did these last years…I want the most important people of my life to be happy no matter what. I want them to be happy as I was with them…"

Misao opened her mouth, thinking about these three years which were the most miserable she ever had. Scholastica guessed her thoughts then smiled to her with a comfort look, understanding her pain.

However, Benedictus shook his head again then ran toward her in order to hug her again.

"Brother…"

"You…You ask me to be happy? Without you, that's impossible!"

Scholastica opened her mouth, a bit surprised. But Benedictus ignored her again then hugged her tighter.

"I don't want…I don't want you to leave! Not again, please! …I want you to stay here with me, forever! I don't want to be alone again…Please, Scholastica."

"Brother…" Scholastica wanted to say but he cut her off.

"I want to experience anything! I want to spend the rest of my life with you and nobody else!" Benedictus cried out. "…I want us to laugh together…I want us to cry together…I want us to eat pizza together…I want you to do stupid things and I want me to scold you as before…And I want us to comfort each other and I want me to explain everything to you about your first love…I want anything as long as I'm with you!"

"…Brother…"

Scholastica didn't know what to answer to this. Benedictus cried again.

"…I want everything…My world around me could collapse…I wouldn't care…as long as I'm with you! And if you must leave…I'm going up with you!"

"…Brother, don't say that…" Scholastica began, caressing his face tenderly. "…I don't want you to do something like that…"

"But…" Benedictus sniffed. "…We are two halves of a same being…That's how I always thought."

Scholastica shook her head, and then dried a tear that rolled from his eye.

"We already did everything together…For the best or for the worst, we did everything. Brother…We are two people…I'm sure you'll manage someday to find a goal in your life. I trust you for this…"

"…" Benedictus clenched his teeth, tears rolling again on his cheeks. She then turned back toward Misao.

"…I wouldn't really leave both you after all…I will always watch you from above…As well as in your hearts…In some way…I would be somehow "alive"…as long as you'll never forget me…"

Misao nodded, agreed with her…It seemed she was right…People never really leave as long as they exist in thoughts. She calmly tried to smile without any success. Then Scholastica kissed her brother on his cheek before hugging him back again. Then she headed for Misao who was crying now and didn't try to hide it anymore…Scholastica hugged her tenderly during some minutes.

"…it would be okay…Misao…I would be with you too…Everyone would be with you…okay?"

"…" Misao couldn't answer directly as her tears prevented her to speak. Finally she managed to say:

"…Okay."

Scholastica smiled then kissed her on her cheek as well. Then she moved next to her grave where they found before, holding the origami dear in her hand again. She then turned back toward Benedictus and Misao who watched her fading away gradually. Finally, Scholastica looked tenderly them and confessed what she wanted to say to them a long time ago:

"…Truly and deeply…thanks for being my brother and my best friend, the two who made my life the happiest I could have…I'm so happy for being with you to the last very end."

"…"

Scholastica then said, giving them the most beautiful of her smile:

"I love you…"

"…Scholastica! I lo…!"

Unfortunately, Benedictus couldn't say the end of the sentence…

Scholastica now disappeared from their eyes, plunging the graveyard in the silence it always had before. Next to them, snow began to fall down but Benedictus didn't care of it then fell to his knees, sobbing and crying as he never cried before and calling Scholastica's name the loudest he could.

"…Scholastica…Scholastica!" He repeated, hiding his face into his hands, avoiding the cold around him.

Misao didn't answer. She cried silently and watched the cloud sky where snow fell down. She could see the wind bringing some flakes in its current very away or close to them.

She could then see one flake put down on Scholastica's grave, next to the engraving letters:

"Scholastica beloved daughter, friend and sister."