After a second I felt so weak that I closed my eyes and passed out.
DPOV
She put her hand on my cheek and looked like she was trying very hard to focus on me but couldn't and slowly she closed her eyes. At first I thought it was another contraction but she went limp in my arms and I panicked, what was wrong?
"Roza, Roza open your eyes and look at me, don't fall asleep!" she didn't move.
"What's wrong?" Viktoria asked, worried filled her voice and it took me a moment to realize that she spoke Russian so Adrian didn't understand but turned around anyways.
"She fainted and this is definitely not good" I said shaking her gently.
Her breathing was uneven as if she couldn't breathe properly and that's when I smelled it. The coppery smell of blood was hanging in the air and I think that that was why Adrian turned around. His eyes were fixed on her but I could see the hunger in his eyes. When had it been the last time he fed?
I touched the part of her dress that looked wet and saw the blood on my hand.
"Drive faster damn it, she's bleeding!" I yelled at the driver.
I couldn't believe this was happening. She was fine just a couple of hours ago, what went wrong? I bet she had been stressing about something, but what? I knew that something was wrong with her since we came back from Russia. I knew she'd been keeping something from me and I didn't know what that was. I didn't want to go ahead and try to find out because I knew it would upset her, the fact that I was intruding in something she wasn't ready to share with me.
When she stopped breathing my heart nearly stopped. I couldn't believe it, she was fine a minute ago, and everything was fine. Why was this happening? I tried to keep my self calm, I couldn't panic and mess things up because this was the moment she needed me the most. I wasn't going to panic, I couldn't.
I shook her gently, placing my hand on her belly to let our baby know I was here and would do anything for her, she didn't respond nor did she took a breath and I just panicked. My heart started to beat faster than it already was and for a moment I couldn't breathe either because realization hit me and it almost drown me with sorrow. She was not breathing; nothing, nada, and that meant… the baby!
"She's not breathing! We need to get there, now!" I yelled at the driver who was speeding.
"Roza, wake up!" Viktoria said alarmed and took her hand but Roza didn't squeeze her hand back.
"Her blood smells so sweet…" Adrian murmured in a daze, his eyes focused on her neck and he leaned closer from the front seat. But a slap from Viktoria brought him back to reality. He touched his cheek with his hand as if not sure what just happened.
"We're here!" the driver said as he parked right in front of the ER and I was a little relived but at the same time worried. Adrian opened the door for me and a second later I climbed out of the car with Roza on my arms and ran inside.
"I need a doctor, now!" I was used to the fact that I yelled and everyone would come as fast as they could so they wouldn't have to face my wrath but the moment I yelled they just stood there looking at me like I was crazy. IT took them a moment to I put her there and they took her away.
"What happened?" Was she really asking me that?
"Her water broke, we got into the car and then she just passed out, she was bleeding and stopped breathing. Do something!" I practically yelled as I walked along her and the other doctors that were hovering around her. One was bumping oxygen to her lungs with a mask while the other doctor or whatever kept checking her pulse.
"We can't do much if she's gone into labor, we either save the baby or her, make a choice." Her words felt more like a damn slap on the face. She had to be kidding.
"What?"I asked stupidly. "I can't do that. I can't, just save both of them." We got to the zone where I couldn't go and she let Roza go with the other doctors.
"I'll do my best but I need to know who you want me to save." Her piercing glare felt like nothing I've ever felt before. It was a feeling, like something was gnawing my inside, eating me slowly.
"Save… Roza" I said, but it hurt me, it was like cutting part of me. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't move, I couldn't do anything. Just stood there and watched the doctor walk away with an answer I might regret for the rest of my life.
"What happened, how is she?" Viktoria said from behind me, her hand on my shoulder and I turned around to see Adrian beside her.
"She might die and they gave me a choice, her or the baby. I said her." Viktoria seemed shocked, her face contorted for a moment with anger and then she slapped me, hard that it made my head snap side ways. Beside her Adrian was so shocked that he only backed away and sat down on one of the benches on the waiting room. But I didn't care about anything, I couldn't feel anything, my heart was an empty room that could only be filled with Roza's love, smile and laugh.
Also with my baby's life which was probably being ended right now because of me, because I couldn't bear the thought of losing her Mother. Now I was going to live with that the rest of my life, have to face my Roza with the guilt of having killed our baby for my selfish reasons of not wanting to lose Roza. How was I supposed to live with that, and if I had chosen the baby instead of Roza would I have had the courage to face my own child without her Mother?
I sat down too, Viktoria just stood there, looking at the doors where Roza went through and probably our baby probably wouldn't come out alive. Her form stood there, tense, not moving at all but only staring. Her shoulders shook slightly and it took me some time to realize what was happening, she was crying. I wanted to stand up and go to her, console her because I knew she needed me but I just couldn't. Because I also needed someone but the only person who could do that would probably hate me the moment she realized I killed our baby.
So when Adrian stood up and went to her, hugged her and turned her around to face him and she buried her face on his chest I felt relieved but something in my chest tightened and snapped. Something just snapped together, it clicked inside me and all the pieces of the puzzle just snapped together.
The trip to Russia, Adrian going, Adrian spending time with us and getting too close to Viktoria. Adrian suddenly deciding to go back to St. Vladimir and now consoling my sister as if she was his… lover. Roza knew, she knew all along and didn't tell me, that's exactly what caused all the stress in her. How could I not have seen this coming? It was so obvious, all the signs were there and I was blind.
I stood up, walked over to them but stopped the moment my eyes met with Viktoria's. She looked at me with… something in her eyes. It wasn't anger but something else. She looked apologetically at me and begged me with her eyes to understand. She wanted me to understand, but I couldn't, I didn't know what to do because I felt so confused.
I needed to distract my self with something, anything.
"I'm going to call Abe," I said and walked to the end of the hall to have some privacy.
I dialed the number and waited a few seconds, gathering my courage to say that Roza was in the hospital.
"Where the hell is my daughter Belikov?" I completely forgot about the fact that he already knew my phone number.
"She's-we're at the hospital. She went into labor but…" He hung up and I was sure he was on his way over here without listening to the rest of what I had to say.
"Dimitri!" I heard Viktoria yell and turned around. The doctor was standing beside her and I ran toward them expecting the worst.
"How's the baby?" I asked, kind of already knowing the answer but waiting to hear it but the devastating news never came, instead she smiled.
"Fine, we saved them both and they're fine, she's awake now and wants to see you." I let out a breath I didn't know I'd been holding and nodded with a big grin on my face. Everything was going to be alright, I kept repeating to my self as I walked with her to the nurse's room and put on scrubbed into the room where Roza was.
But something was off because from outside I could hear her screaming so I ran into the room and the moment she saw me she managed a small smile for a moment before screaming again and trashing because of the pain.
I sat down next to her and took her hand. I didn't know what else to do. She gripped my hand so tight, but I didn't mind at all because I was happy for us. She only had a moment to breathe between contractions and there was sweat on her face, her hair completely soaked on it. My heart broke every time I heard her scream and I was getting very nervous.
"Talk to her, try to keep her mind off the pain because its going to be hours till she's fully dilated." Ok, I kinda knew what she meant.
"Roza, Roza look at me." As another contraction passed she managed to look at me and I saw tears rolling down her cheeks.
"It hurts Dimitri, it hurts so much" She started crying again and I wanted to do something to take the pain away but couldn't, I wasn't a doctor or anything. I was merely an idiotic male who had no idea what she was going through.
Roza was panting and barely had time to breathe before she had another contraction. I wiped the sweat from her forehead with a damp cloth the doctor gave me.
"Hang in there sweetie, it'll be over soon and you'll be so happy to have your baby that you'll forget about this." The nurse said with a sweet voice but somehow Roza didn't get that as something nice because the glare she gave her made her flinch a little.
Roza was panting again, and then suddenly she stopped and then a soft moan gave away to a short startling scream, a bloodcurdling one that made me jump a little bit when, in surprise, she started to trash around again, moving her head from side to side.
"Dimitri… I can't do this… I can't do it anymore…it… hurts… so much!" It took her too long to say the words and then another wave of pain hit her, she screamed and her grip on my hand tightened. "Son of a bitch!" She screamed again and I almost smiled.
The screams kept on going and going till I couldn't stand them anymore and made me feel horrible. The cursing didn't stop either but I could live with that.
"Roza, you can do this, I know you can." I said, tucking her hair behind her ears. She screamed again, louder this time. She wasn't prepared for this, she was too young, we were too young and neither of us could handle this. Frantically I rang the bell for the nurse and heard my Roza cry in pain.
A moment later a nurse poke her head in and came inside with a bright smile on her smile when she saw Roza screaming.
"How's it going?" She asked and I just stared at her.
"How the hell does it look like its going?" I asked outraged and raising my voice a little but she dismissed it with a wave of her hand. Roza was in agony and she was just standing there, looking at the monitors and nodding approvingly.
"It looks ok to me," I was about to start yelling but she turned to face me and sighed. "Look, Mr.…"
"Belikov" I finished for her through gritted teeth.
"… Belikov, this is completely normal and is also the reason why little girls like her, how old is she, seventeen, eighteen?, shouldn't get pregnant at such an early age." I gaped at her because I had no idea what to say. She was right of course but…
"She'll be fine after the baby's born. Don't worry." She finished and then turned to Roza with a small smile. "You're almost there, Roza. This is the hard part. You're in transition now. After this it gets lots easier and pretty soon you can start to push" Neither Roza or I looked too happy for her.
"I can't… I…" She screamed again as another contraction hit her.
Don't even ask how I knew how to write all the stuff about the birth because its rather funny. See, I've never been with nobody having a baby, thank God, but I watch the health channel and read a book that had a part where the girl had a baby so I kinda got some ideas from there and yes I am fourteen. What the hell is wrong with knowing what to write and all that? I might be young but not naïve about how much it hurts to have babies! Which is why I've decided to never, ever, have children. I mean, they are just little persons who cry and vomit on you all the time, not to mention the smell of the poop! Ugh *chills*
For a moment I scared you there right, with Dimitri having to choose? I also thought the baby was going to die but then... well, I had a change of heart. I'm a sucker for happy endings so sue me!
But I hope that you really like the story, please review every chapter not just the last one because that's not enough for me.