This is another random moment at home with Lincoln….

The following chapter occurred the day of the masquerade ball and before Lincoln's journey to Canada.

Lincoln carefully pulled the vinyl record from his sleeve. He blew the dust from the enlarged diskette, a sign of its disuse. It was from the Rolling Stones' Exile on Main St. It was a gift from his father when he turned nine years old. Wrapped in polka dot wrapping paper, the vinyl record was a gift that his father received back when he was a teenager. According to his father, it was a rite of passage. Unfortunately, he couldn't share a cold one like he did with his father when he was Lincoln's age, but he shared a soda with him on the front steps of the Loud residence. It was to signify his transition into adolescence. Although Lincoln had yet became a teenager, but he wanted Lincoln to understand that life wasn't going to be easy. Sometimes, a person is forced to do things that may look oblique or didn't make any sense, but understood that within every torn fabric, a silver lining exist. Lincoln nodded as they toasted over their generic grape soda.

He pulled the record player from under his bed. He set it on his desk. He tuned it to the position where the track of his choice would began. "Torn and Frayed" was the serenade of the night inside of Lincoln's bedroom. He slowly pulled on his undergarments. He sprayed his best cologne that he obtained from his father. He looked into the mirror. In front of him was a young gentleman. He was a boy who was transitioning to a man. He saw a few pencil-like hairs curling around his chest. He saw a small freckle of a moustache. Last night as he was talking to Clyde, his voice croaked. Enough signage that the inevitable was approaching. However, he did not feel like a teenager. Young teenagers don't have encounters with older women, he thought to himself. Young teenagers don't have multiple partners. Teenagers his age should feel happy of the endless affections, endless gifts, endless love making, but now him. A surge of sadness waved over his body as he was having cold feet of going to the masquerade ball with Chloe. He stood back and sat on the bed. He was careful not to wrinkle his suit. A suit that was worth over hundreds of dollars. A suit that Chloe purchased for this occasion. A suit that was free and at his expense.

For a moment, Lincoln felt like more of a harlot than in a harem.

He was happy that the following morning, he and Clyde were taking the bus to the outskirts of town to see the mysterious Luka. He wanted advice and was in dire need of empathy. Grateful for Clyde, but Clyde didn't understand the ramifications of the situations. In shear honesty, Clyde only knew a fractions of the women he had slept with.

He questioned the endgame because like in early harem, there has to be a leading contender. Who was the winner in this harem, he questioned. Because he was wondering who was winning the race. Better yet, who does he had feelings for.

He twiddle with the ring that Sam gave him on that night at the carnival. She was the first girl he accepted as his girlfriend. Since then, he and Sam had encounters. With or without Luna. Sam didn't fulfill the end of the bargain. She promised Lincoln that they would share with Luna. lately, she has been making excuses for not seeing Luna to spend time with him. Luna was concerned. But instead of confronting her girlfriend, she used her stress out on Lincoln. In the end, she cradled around him and shed tears. Most of those tears were for Sam.

The Loud residence was no longer a home, but a fortress with woman fighting for his affections. The siblinghood turned into a rivalry of beast who would stop at nothing to get at him. Lincoln was getting aware of the alignment of parties sticking together. He knew Lori, Leni, and Luna formed an alliance; Lucy and his mother, Rita were an alliance; Luan and Lynn formed an alliance, but was loose because of the common goal of defense from the others. He figured it out on how they were together in packs, like wolves. So much so, that these parties were moving into each other's room because neither parties trusted each other. The younger siblings were becoming fearful. Lola and Lana asked their Aunt Ruth to stay with her for awhile. Lisa and Lily began staying with his grandfather. Even his father began spending more time at the office than at home. There were days when he didn't come home at all.

Lincoln rubbed his arm tenderly. He began gripping it tightly as he tried to hold back the tears. Never in his life did he think that this harem was going to separate his family. There was a divide and he felt responsible.

He made it in his mind that he was planning to leave the residence until things calm down. He just didn't know when. He had enough cash for a bus ticket and camping expenses. He had gone to different places on different days. He went to places on different days to not surround suspicion. He hid the merchandise in different parts of the house, places where he knew that the girls weren't going to notice it. When he felt the time was right, he was going to retrieve the items and make his leave. He tucked in his lip because he knew it was option he didn't think he had a choice. It is for the girls. It is for the girls. It is for the girls. He replayed it in his mind until he felt it sounded believable.

He fiddled with his phone as he saw the message that Chloe left him. She was to arrive in about an hour. An hour for him to think of being in a room of the upper class. An hour to think of dance moves because he has two left feet. An hour to ponder on his future. An hour of possibilities. He was thinking too much again, he thought as he put his phone down.

He still pondered on what Nory told him that day at Magnolia's. Which girl is the right one for Lincoln? He stretched out on the bed to ponder on that thought. Firstly, I care about these girls dearly. Each and every one of them. Then yet, is the relationship we share based out of love or based out of lust? I don't know if my feelings are true love for any of them. Is the love I had for Ronnie Anne should be an example? Is it the love I have for Sam and Luna an example? Better yet, is the love I had for Summer a better example?

She went away as mysterious as she came, that fateful evening. I gave her my number if she wanted to reach me. Her cabin was two streets down from mine. From what she had told me, she came with friends. She says she came from Notre Dame. She was studying Philosophy. I asked what she plan to do with it, she told me to have a career in life. That was fascinating, to be honest. The fact that a nineteen year old girl wanted a time of day with a fragile, meek teenager like myself. Her blue eyes, calm as the gentle sea, lying itself beside the shore, calmed me. It relaxed me. It told me not to worry but to trust myself into her. That was exactly what I did.

I was fortunate that evening that Lori was in charge. My mom and dad went to the lakefront to watch the fireworks show. I knew my sister would spend her free time on the phone with Bobby, so I took advantage of sneaking out. Wanting to be the cool, older kid, I wore my best clothes and wore my father's best cologne. Summer was waiting by the stop sign at the end of my street. She was wearing a pink blouse and white shorts. She had her sweater wrapped in her arms. She had a pristine smile on her face. She was happy to see me. I asked her where we were going. She told me that it was a surprise. Overlooking my judgement, I followed the gentle damsel to parts unknown. We walked through the shoreside. I could still smell her from earlier. She smelled of the lake and suntan lotion. It was a sweet scent. A feeling to remind me of that for many years to come. It wasn't everyday to have this kind of experience. This kind of adventure. This kind of discovery. I wonder that if that was how the guys my age felt in those coming of age movies? The nervousness in the pit of your stomach. Your brain alerting you to deter, resist, stop. Your heart going into leaps of excitement. Your body was moving regardless of true feelings. A feeling I had no regrets.

She told me that this was her favorite spot because it gave her a good vantage point of the lakefront. There was a festival going on. She could have gone. We could have gone. But instead, she wanted to be alone with me. She told me that she had never done this with a boy before. I was touched, but felt she was lying. Regardless, I was too happy to care as we was approaching her private spot.

Nestled at the foot of the hills and cradled by the soft, white sand, her secret spot that gave us the best view of Lake Michigan. From the distance, I can even see a lighthouse. It was very picturesque. She smiled as she saw how captivated I was of the scenery.

It was beautiful, I told her. I took off my shoes as she told me that it wasn't the only thing to make it fascinating. She pulled aside a blanket and a some branches from the nearby bush. I watched her light a small fire. We sat on the blanket and watched the festivities. We had a perfect shot of the fireworks show.

She poked the fire with a stick to keep it ablaze. She lied down and watched the sky. The crescent moon shined brightly on that night. It was so close to the lake that it looked it was touching it. I joined Summer as we got close to each other. Using each other as warmth for the summer night was cool; not surprising. With the exception of the crackling fire, it was silence. We lied there and looked at the sky.

Lincoln's thought was interrupted by a knock on the door. He sat up and walked to the door. He was grateful that he knew it was only his father. He didn't know where the girls went, but he didn't care. His father was here and that was all the mattered.

"Come on in, Dad." Lincoln showed his father into his bedroom. He sat on the bed as he stared at Lincoln. In return, he stared at his father. His eyes were red and puffy. His face was pale. It looked as if he had been up for a few days. Lincoln closed the door and grabbed a chair to sit across from his father. He lowered the record player so he could talk to his father.

He held the sleeve of the tuxedo. He let out a smile before talking to his son. "I am excited that my little man is going to his first ball with a girl." He coughed. Lincoln knew he was managing the tears. Something had to be wrong, but he, too, was trying to conceal it. "It feels like yesterday that my son was riding his trike and putting on his father's shoes."

Lincoln wore his plastic smile and laughed along with his father's role of being a father. "It doesn't feel that long ago, Dad. Those days feel so surreal. One day I was in diapers and the next, I am a teenager."

"I can hear it in your voice," said his father. "I am happy to see you in a position of being responsible and well-suited of taking care of a lady." He sighed. "Although I don't condone the fact you are having sex, but you are being a gentleman. Let me ask you this? Do you wear condoms?"

Lincoln shook his head half-heartedly. "I do, Dad. I am well-aware of the risk of pregnancy and diseases out there. I don't want to be a father yet and I don't want to get burned."

"Good, because someone in this family have to show resilience." He looked at his feet. Lincoln knew that his father hasn't been himself. It was the first time he had seen his father in a couple of days. He observed his unshaved face and the clothes he had previously wore a few days back. Lincoln wiped his face with the sleeve of his shirt. He cracked his knuckles and returned his sight on his father. I want to tell the truth. I have to end this. My father doesn't deserve this. It is my fault and at his expense, he is suffering. This is a man who loves his wife and his family. He doesn't deserve the hell I have caused. I am sorry, Dad. Those were words he wanted to say. Bittersweet words to null the pain of his father. Words he knew they would never come out. Because by releasing those words, the dynamic of the family and the relationship of those around him were to crumbled. He let out a smile for his cowardice.

"Dad," said Lincoln before pausing. He trying to capture his thoughts. "Remember the Rolling Stones album you have given me."

"I do," replied his father. "It was a gift from my old man back I was your age."

"That present, that gift. It was meaningful to me. I say that because you show appreciation. You were excited to express that love for your son. It was pure and absolute love."

"Thanks, son. I was very selective on the gift because this album reminds me of you in this time."

"Explain."

"You are at age that changes are going to happen. Good changes, bad changes, changes in general. This album to me shows that life is going to happen. We will face challenges. Joy, pain, sunshine, rain. Life can love you and hate you. It can pat your cheek and slap you with the same hand. I just wanted to show you that no matter how life gets at you, stay strong."

Lincoln got up and move aside his tuxedo. He sat beside his father. It was a welcoming feeling. There was love in the room. Something he haven't felt in awhile. True, unconditional love."

"Seeing you going on dates, hanging out with friends, it is like you are growing up too fast," said his father. "It makes me want to tell you to show down. There is no rush. Let life take its course. Before long, you will be out of the house and finding your own way of living."

"Yes, sir."

"I just hope that I am doing the best I can to be a supporting father. Even though lately the role hasn't been filled very well."

Lincoln put his hand on his father's shoulder. "You are a great father! You have always been a great dad! I just haven't filling the role of being a good son."

"I know, son. It is just things have been out of whack lately. It is like I don't know my own family." He stammered a bit, trying to combat the tears. "Mama Bear doesn't even notice the pet names and jokes anymore. Luan, Lori, Luna, and the others don't even give me a time or day. Work has been stressing me out. I hardly see you. Where did I go wrong for this family to change?"

Lincoln bit his lip as hard as he could. If he wanted to break skin, he would. He had never felt pain like that. And hearing it from his father was making it worse.

"I pray at night, son. It is something I try to do. I asked God to return my family. That is all I want, Lincoln," said his father as he wiped his eye. "My wacky, extraordinary family. I want it back! I miss it."

"I miss it, too, Dad," said Lincoln. "I miss it also."

"I am sorry, Lincoln. Dad got too caught up with himself. I came up here because I wanted to give you something." Lynn pulled the box beside him. Lincoln didn't noticed it earlier. Inside was a corsage. "If you are going to treat a woman right, then you must make sure she is feeling right." He handed it to Lincoln. "Give this to her and let her know how important she is to you. Even if that feeling is for a night." He took another breath. "I don't know if you are seeing her or others, but understand Lincoln, there is one girl out there you must treat special. A girl that understands you. A girl that appreciates the imperfections and your blueprint in general. The same goes for you, Lincoln. I know you are too young to understand love. I don't expect to understand. Just know that one of these days, you will have to choose a girl that you sincerely care for."

Lynn stood up and walked to the front of Lincoln's door. "I love you, Lincoln. I love you guys. I am going to do whatever it takes to repair this family. I refuse to quit. You should as well." He had his hand on the knob. "Understand that there are no mistakes if it is a destiny. Everything happens for a reason. I just hope I am following the right course. Have you a good dance and love you, son."

Lynn closed the door from behind him. Lincoln held the corsage gently. He eyed the color and he blushed at its sight. It was a beautiful, delicate flower, he thought to himself.

He looked at his watch and saw that he had twenty minutes. He hurried as he got his tuxedo ready. At any moment, Chloe was going to be at his doorstep.

Understand that there are no mistakes if it is a destiny. Everything happens for a reason.

Your father displays good wisdom, Lincoln. It is really sad to see him caught in a web of this situation. He isn't lying. I am beginning to suspect that he, too, is aware of the role of being an unwilling participant. It is sad, but we must fill the roles in order to serve a higher purpose. There is something in the paradigm, Lincoln. It is coming closer and closer by the minute. Be prepared for the day is approaching. Don't know when, but is happening. Like day follows night and night follows day.

This concludes another random moment at home with Lincoln. The plot is thickening and amazing that his conscience is joining this particular adventure. Until next time.