Oh my God. It's Christmas Eve. I am literally too excited too type.
7: 03 pm Antceratops Shudder has added 34 pictures to his photo album Too Sexy For My Shirt
Thurid Guild and Luster Violet like this
7: 05 pm Tanith Low: Why are you topless in all of them?
7: 06 pm Antceratops Shudder: Because I'm. Too. Sexy. For. My. Shirt. ;D
7: 10 pm Fletcher Renn: Not as sexy as I look in this tuxedo for China's party! :D
7: 12 pm Erskine Ravel: Anton, I'm deeply worried as to why you're taking your shirt off half an hour before you're meant to be at mine for Christmas Eve Dinner :/
7: 13 pm Antceratops Shudder: Fletcher, I'll gist you. Erskine, this photo album is my way of giving to the less fortunate at the time of year when everyone needs some love.
7: 14 pm Antceratops Shudder: And what better present could they get than pictures of me?
7: 15 pm Erskine Ravel: The 'less fortunate'?
7: 15 pm Antceratops Shudder: I just feel sorry for those that don't have my body.
7: 17 pm Erskine Ravel: It must say something about me that I'm best friends with you.
7: 23 pm Fletcher Renn is walking through the streets of Dublin dressed in a tinsel-edged tuxedo and has gotten not one strange look. I love this season :)
7: 26 pm Skulduggery Pleasant: We've known that since you started singing 'It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas' midway through October.
7: 27 pm Fletcher Renn: Can't talk now, just entering China's party
Fletcher Renn is offline
7: 30 pm Skulduggery Pleasant: Remind me again why we hang around with him?
7: 32 pm Valkyrie Cain: Because he gives you a piggybacks every time you announce your bones have contracted arthiritis and you can't possibly walk.
7: 33 pm Skulduggery Pleasant: Ah, yes :}
7: 38 pm PM message: Antceratops Shudder to Dexter Vex, Grouchly Bespoke, Leo DiCaprio and Skulduggery Pleasant
Subject: Close encounters of the sloth kind
When I left the Hotel to catch a taxi to Erskine's Freddie crawled into my bag and he won't get out...do you think Erskine'll mind?
7: 41 pm PM message: Skulduggery Pleasant to Antceratops Shudder, Dexter Vex, Grouchly Bespoke and Leo DiCaprio
Do you think he'll mind if you drop a bomb onto his house?
7: 42 pm PM message: Dexter Vex to Antceratops Shudder, Grouchly Bespoke, Leo DiCaprio and Skulduggery Pleasant
Can we please just take a moment to apreciate Anton's 'bag'?
7: 44 pm PM message: Antceratops Shudder to Dexter Vex, Grouchly Bespoke, Leo DiCaprio and Skulduggery Pleasant
IT'S A MAN BAG, OK? It's in style! I could use some help here, Ghastly...
7: 46 pm PM message: Skulduggery Pleasant to Antceratops Shudder, Dexter Vex, Grouchly Bespoke and Leo DiCaprio
No point talking to Ghastly or Leo, they're both engrossed in a high-stakes Call of Duty game
7: 47 pm PM message: Antceratops Shudder to Dexter Vex, Grouchly Bespoke, Leo DiCaprio and Skulduggery Pleasant
Who cares about Ghastly and Leo's gay love, I'm worried about whether or not Erskine's going to slice my head off!
7: 49 pm PM message: Skulduggery Pleasant to Antceratops Shudder, Dexter Vex, Grouchly Bespoke and Leo DiCaprio
Oh, he won't slice your head off.
7: 49 pm PM message: Dexter Vex to Antceratops Shudder, Grouchly Bespoke, Leo DiCaprio and Skulduggery Pleasant
He'll probably punch your nose in, then he'll slice your head off and fry it along with the turkey. You know how much he hates Freddie, for reasons still unexplained.
7: 50 pm PM message: Antceratops Shudder to Dexter Vex, Grouchly Bespoke, Leo DiCaprio and Skulduggery Pleasant
Then I'll just tell him that Freddie has to come along and he'll appreciate my honesty, right? Right?
7: 51 pm PM message: Dexter Vex to Antceratops Shudder, Grouchly Bespoke, Leo DiCaprio and Skulduggery Pleasant
Shush a minute, I'm trying to work out what your tombstone's going to say.
7: 53 pm PM message: Skulduggery Pleasant to Antceratops Shudder, Dexter Vex, Grouchly Bespoke and Leo DiCaprio
Still, if one of his many ex-girlfriends kills him I want it to read 'Here Lies Anton, Killed by Greed and Libido.'
7: 54 pm PM message: Dexter Vex to Antceratops Shudder, Grouchly Bespoke, Leo DiCaprio and Skulduggery Pleasant
Yeah, that's probably more likely
7: 55 pm PM message: Antceratops Shudder to Dexter Vex, Grouchly Bespoke, Leo DiCaprio and Skulduggery Pleasant
This is not a time to go over my long and colourful dating history!
7: 55 pm PM message: Dexter Vex to Antceratops Shudder, Grouchly Bespoke, Leo DiCaprio and Skulduggery Pleasant
OK, fine. I'm sure Erskine will be good with Freddie coming to Christmas Eve Dinner if the sloth behaves himself.
7: 56 pm PM message: Antceratops Shudder to Dexter Vex, Grouchly Bespoke, Leo DiCaprio and Skulduggery Pleasant
Freddie will be a veritable angel.
8: 13 pm Erskine Ravel posted on Antceratops Shudder's Wall
HE DID IT AGAIN AFTER I LET HIM INTO MY HOUSE, I SWEAR ANTON IF YOU DON'T MOVE OUT THE WAY I WILL DESTROY BOTH OF YOU WITH ACTIVE PREJUDICE
8: 14 pm Antceratops Shudder: You'll only make yourself angrier if you type it out all out instead of yelling!
8: 16 pm Erskine Ravel: LET ME AT HIM HIS DEATH WILL BE SHORT
8: 16 pm Antceratops Shudder: Freddie didn't mean to do it! He's sorry! I'm sorry!
8: 17 pm Erskine Ravel: OOOOOOOH THE THINGS I WANT TO SAY
8: 17 pm Erskine Ravel: I'LL TURN HIS FUR INTO A COAT AND THEN BURN IT AND I SHALL LAUGH, ANTON. I SHALL LAUGH.
8: 19 pm Evangeline Evergreen: So Freddie did whatever it was he did last year again?
8: 21 pm Antceratops Shudder: I'm sure Erskine would answer you, but he just screamed a high C and I think it damaged his throat, he's choking and staggering around
8: 22 pm Antceratops Shudder: No wait, he's trying to get the knife drawer open
8: 23 pm Erskine Ravel: I'LL BLOODY STAB HIM!
8: 25 pm Tariana Ravelicious Grace: Erskine, calm down. What happened?
8: 27 pm Erskine Ravel: The sloth - he jumped up - and my leg - OH GOD, MY LEG
8: 28 pm Antceratops Shudder: It's a bit of a deja vu moment, to be honest.
8: 28 pm Erskine Ravel: THE DAMN SLOTH SHAGGED MY LEG, OK
8: 29 pm Finbar Wrong: WHUT?
8: 32 pm Tariana Ravelicious Grace: Oh...my...God.
8: 33 pm Amara Calla: Well we all know where he gets it from...*cough* totally not Anton *cough*
8: 36 pm Dexter Vex: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HE RAPED YOUR LEG AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA someone please stop me
8: 34 pm Leo DiCaprio: That's it. I'm pausing Black Ops. This is too good to miss.
8: 34 pm Grouchly Bespoke: Looks like Trudder babies are going to be getting a run for their money with Slothvel ;)
8: 35 pm Thurid Guild: I'M SORRY I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER HOW HARD I'M LAUGHING
8: 35 pm Dexter Vex: Give me two minutes and I can finish editing this photo I have of Erskine with his arm around Tariana, but I've put Freddie's face over Tariana's and captioned it 'SLOTHVEL'
8: 36 pm Reia Kellyn: What is this Mistskine, Dexskine, Shavel, you speak of? SLOTHVEL FTW
8: 37 pm Erskine Ravel: SHUT UP!
8: 37 pm Dexter Vex: Come on Erskine, remember that everyone is Ravelsexual, human or not, don't discriminate
8: 38 pm Tanith Low: SLOTHVEL OTP FOR LIFE THE WAY ERSKINE LOOKS AT SLOTH OMG
8: 39 pm Evangeline Evergreen: Sloth/Ravel is life and everyone else who doesn't believe is wrong
8: 39 pm Valkyrie Cain: They have such chemistry I can't even begin to describe them
8: 40 pm Grouchly Bespoke: Hey Erskine, you never told me you and Freddie were hanging around together! Get it? GET IT?
8: 40 pm Erskine Ravel: I would just like to clarify that the sloth attacked ME. I could sue. That is statutory rape. It is borderline sexual HARASSMENT.
8: 41 pm Antceratops Shudder: It isn't harassment if you liked it ;)
8: 42 pm Erskine Ravel: Be quiet. I still haven't forgiven you.
8: 43 pm Amara Calla: You can claim you are nothing like Anton and his womanizing ways but you sure do get around, don't you, Erskine? ;D
8: 44 pm Erskine Ravel: Tariana, please come over. I need one person that doesn't accuse me of innapropriate relationships with animals :L
8: 44 pm Tariana Ravelicious Grace: Sure. But I don't need to accuse when we all know it's true ;)
Dexter Vex and Skulduggery Pleasant like this
Tariana Ravelicious Grace is offline
8: 45 pm Dexter Vex: ERSKINE HOW COULD YOU DON'T YOU THINK OF FREDDIE'S FEELINGS HOW CAN YOU CHEAT ON HIM
8: 45 pm Grouchly Bespoke: It explains everything! Last Christmas Freddie gave him his heart but the very next day he gave it away...or something like that.
8: 46 pm Tanith Low: I've worked it out! After their brief tryst last Christmas Eve Erskine promised Freddie he would be with him always and then Freddie saw him kissing Tariana on Christmas Day at my party so he was heartbroken and avoided him for the whole year. And then this Christmas when he saw Erskine again he couldn't help it and just HAD TO HAVE ERSKINE RIGHT THERE, RIGHT THEN.
8: 48 pm Erskine Ravel: Anton, get you and that THING out of my house so Tariana can come over. I am now going off SkulBook and I don't want this to be mentioned ever again.
8: 54 pm Dexter Vex: ...You got SHAGGED by a SLOTH! XDDDD
8: 53 pm Valkyrie Cain: Oh God I'm actually crying with laughter
Erskine Ravel is offline
8: 55 pm Antceratops Shudder: So who here would totally go to see a Slothvel film?
8: 56 pm Fletcher Renn Just made out with China's naked Venus statue! Best. Christmas Eve. Ever.
9: 01 pm Tanith Low: Please, all we're talking about is Slothvel
9: 03 pm Fletcher Renn: What's that, a disease?
9: 05 pm Dexter Vex: That's got me thinking, can sloths get herpes? Just wondering.
9: 08 pm Amara Calla: If sloths can get herpes then I'm not sitting next to Erskine tomorrow.
9: 09 pm Antceratops Shudder: Jesus fuck he's my best friend but I don't want to contract any possible STIs he got off Freddie :/ I'll sit opposite him as long as we don't have to share cranberry sauce.
9: 09 pm Skulduggery Pleasant: I'm not entirely sure if I can get diseases, but I think I'll sit at the opposite end of the dinner table, just in case.
9: 09 pm Valkyrie Cain: I'll only be there tomorrow for an hour at most, so I'm safe.
9: 10 pm Tanith Low: I'm sitting at the head of the table so I can get food from the kitchen easily, so I can't sit beside him...
9: 10 pm Reia Kellyn: I'm soo not sitting next to Erskine either.
9: 10 pm Dexter Vex: Yeah, and I better protect my woman from the airborne germs, so neither can I.
9: 11 pm Grouchly Bespoke: I think I'll sit next to Tanith to help her get dishes from the kitchen.
9: 11 pm Leo DiCaprio: I can't afford to get germs, I have a photoshoot next week. I think it's better if I stay away
9: 12 pm Fletcher Renn: Wait...what?
9: 14 pm Tanith Low: Looks like you're sitting beside Erskine, Fletcher.
9: 15 pm Antceratops Shudder: It's fine. He's got Gingerus Dandruffus anyway, I don't think you can get any disease worse than that.
9: 17 pm Erskine Ravel: It was my leg, OK? It was my LEG!
9: 19 pm Leo DiCaprio: Denial gets you nowhere, Erskine :)
9: 19 pm Fletcher Renn: And even I know that's not a river in Egypt.
9: 20 pm Erskine Ravel: The sloth and I are NOT fucking! And you can't treat me like a leper!
9: 23 pm Valkyrie Cain: I am seriously considering swapping the present I bought Erskine for a box of condoms.
9: 25 pm Antceratops Shudder: I think I speak for everyone when I say: Best. Christmas Eve. EVER.
10: 16 pm PM message: Fletcher Renn to Tanith Low
Happy two-hours-until-Christmas! And just wondering, what time are we supposed to be at your apartment tomorrow?
10: 19 pm PM message: Tanith Low to Fletcher Renn
Happy nearly Christmas too :) If you get to mine for about 12 then we can all open presents together
10: 20 pm PM message: Fletcher Renn to Tanith Low
Great, what's the dress code? Casual-formal? Formal? Casual?
10: 25 pm PM message: Tanith Low to Fletcher Renn
Uh, smart casual I guess, just wear something nice that's not too fancy. Why do you want to know?
10: 26 pm PM message: Fletcher Renn to Tanith Low
When I got back to my hotel from China's party, you know that concierge I told you about, the one that's obsessed with me? Well, I think he was a bit drunk because he started kissing my hair and then he ripped off my tuxedo and kind of tore it
10: 30 pm PM message: Fletcher Renn to Tanith Low
Tanith? Taaaaaanith?
10: 37 pm PM message: Tanith Low to Fletcher Renn
Sorry. Ghastly's over and he's kind of distracting me
10: 39 pm PM message: Fletcher Renn to Tanith Low
Oh really? ;D Get in there, girl!
10: 42 pm PM message: Tanith Low to Fletcher Renn
I really appreciate your gay best friend efforts but I'm - ah -distracted right now
10: 44 pm PM message: Fletcher Renn to Tanith Low
If you need anything, let me know!
10: 44 pm PM message: Fletcher Renn to Tanith Low
Snacks?
10: 45 pm PM message: Fletcher Renn to Tanith Low
A condom?
10: 45 pm PM message: Fletcher Renn to Tanith Low
Oh God, love ya!
10: 48 pm Fletcher Renn 'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house, not a creature was stirring apart from Ghanith, who were having the dirtiest sex imaginable.