"Half Blood Harry Potter"
By Loki Palmer
Author's Note: Harry Potter and all related characters belong to J.K. Rowling. Percy Jackson and all related demigods (with the exception of Loki) belong to Rick Riordan.
Ace Trainer Jesse: Glad you are enjoying it, and no, Hel (nor any of the Norse gods) are a part of the universe at this point in time, having all died in the battle of Ragnarok. The Loki in this fanfic is not Loki Laufeyson, but rather a demigod son of Hades.
Venequine1990: Knowing me, would you expect me to keep characters I hate alive for very long? Yes, that was a rhetorical question …
WhiteElfElder: Well, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, does it? As for Artemis's attitude towards Harry, well, he wasn't fuming at Artemis like Loki was … but She is still not a fan of the male gender …
Sean Malloy-1: Refer back to Chapters 13 and 14 of this work. The gods had found Sirius innocent, and do you expect a cowering mortal like Cornelius Fudge is going to contradict Them? So, They don't need Pettigrew anymore …
DZ2: Aw, did you spill your saucer of tea laughing at Barty's punishment? Naw, I'm messing with you a little, old friend; I'm glad you are enjoying this all the same!
Chapter 25
The day had arrived at last for the Hogwarts demigods to make it back to England. Loki declared he would be giving them a lift up there, since he was coming along with them.
"Now for my roll call … Thalia, daughter of the Big Guy?"
"Present, of course, dear Loki." She gave him a heated kiss.
He grinned at her. "You will pay for that, you saucy minx. Lord Harry Potter, son of the Big Guy, and Lady Hermione Potter, daughter of the Wise One?"
"Present."
"Percy Jackson, son of Barnacle Beard?"
"Present."
"Annabeth Chase, daughter of the Wise One?"
"Present."
"Neville Longbottom, son of Merlot Breath?"
"Present."
"Luna Lovegood, daughter of Sunny D?"
"Present."
"Remus Lupin, son of Sunny D?"
"Present, though why are you having me along?"
"As Sirius's friend and demigod brother, perhaps you may like to keep him company. Speaking of Sirius, where is that old mutt? I would think he would enjoy a trip like this."
"He is bringing Sally Jackson by Portkey back to England."
"He is WHAT?!" said Percy, shock on his face. "Whatever happened to Smelly Gabe?"
"Let's just say he encountered Medusa's severed head … a more merciful ending for him than, say, puking out his liver and other assorted guts ..." said Loki.
"How did you … you gave her head to Sirius, didn't you, Loki?"
"Maybe I did, maybe I didn't." The twinkle of madness in Loki's eyes said it all. "I would have preferred stringing him up by his own guts from his apartment's balcony, but this end was less messier for him. Although playing an unending card game where you get shot by a gang of cowpokes with itchy trigger fingers in the Underworld is no fun either, I would imagine. As you can tell, Percy, being my friend has its … advantages … Nobody, least of all an alcoholic mortal with an inferiority complex and a short fuse like Smelly Gabe, messes with my friends and comes away unscathed. Now … Fred and George Weasley, the Twin Terrors of Gryffindor and sons of Quickfeet?"
"Present," they said together.
"Seamus Finnegan, son of the Smith?"
"Aye, present."
"Dean Thomas, son of the Warrior?"
"Present."
"Good, everyone is here and accounted for."
"Hey, wait up!" said Grover. "What about me?"
Harry patted him on the shoulder. "Sorry, Grover, but they have a lot of stairs at Hogwarts, I'm afraid."
"Yeah, Grover; unlike high schools in the United States, Hogwarts has no elevators," said Percy. "The Founders built it back in the Middle Ages, long before elevators. Besides, you have to possess a working magical core to attend. Besides, I will have Harry and Loki around to protect me."
"Don't sell yourself short, Seaweed Brain," said Harry. "You are improving your swordsmanship by leaps and bounds."
Grover hugged his old friend. "Stay safe out there, Percy."
"You too, Grover. I will send a message when I can."
"Keep in touch, Grover," said Loki. "The best time to call us would be during the weekends, because I don't think Iris would appreciate having to leave a message if we are unavailable."
"How are we getting there, O Scary One?" said Fred and George.
"I will be flying us out there by way of Fluffy."
WOOF!
"There you are, boy! Who's a good boy? Who's a good boy?"
WOOF!
"So, everyone, gather on, buckle your safety belts and hang onto your stomachs. Hermione, Annabeth – the both of you can hang onto Harry and Percy for dear life if you need to. Giggity. Keep your hands and feet inside the vehicle at all times, and heigh ho, Fluffy – let's go!"
As Fluffy flew into the air at a trot, Harry said, "Loki, how fast or high can we go?"
"Good question, Harry. Those who want to find out, say aye!"
"Aye!" said a number of them.
"All opposed?"
Hermione and Annabeth raised their hands.
"Sorry, ladies, but the rest of the crew outvoted you."
"Well, come on, Loki!" said Percy. "Let's see what this mutt can do!"
Loki grinned at them. "You have just said the magic words ..."
"LOKI!" said Hermione in a scream as Fluffy flew upward, Loki laughing all the way.
"WE'RE GOING TO DIE! WE'RE GOING TO DIE! FIRST, WE'RE GOING TO PUKE, AND THEN WE'RE GOING TO DIE!" said Annabeth.
"Ladies, ladies, relax – with me behind the wheel, what could go wrong, hmm?"
Much to Loki's horror, a fart sounded from Fluffy. Much to his relief, a gust of wind blew the gas cloud away before it could choke him or his fellow riders.
"Oh, Styx, Fluffy – have you been eating your beans today, you gluttonous mutt?"
Fluffy whined.
"Oh, don't give me that – just focus on flying us there, okay?"
WOOF!
"Crazy three headed mutt ..."
~HALF BLOOD HARRY POTTER~
Fluffy made an excellent landing in spite of the thunderstorm that had overtaken Hogwarts.
"Okay, now that we are here safe and sound, in spite of the fears of Hermione and Annabeth ..."
Both of the aforementioned ladies glared at him.
"... yes, ladies, I know, you think I have lost my mind … how about we get a move on? Which of us has not undergone the Sorting yet?"
"Sorting?" said Percy.
"There are four Houses in Hogwarts, and the Sorting Hat determines where you will be," said Harry. "There is Gryffindor for the Noble and Brave, Hufflepuff for the Hardworking and Loyal, Ravenclaw for the Studious and Intelligent, and, last but not least, Slytherin for the Cunning and Ambitious. The Sorting Hat takes your desire into account – it almost Sorted me into Slytherin, but that jerk Malfoy turned me off to the House, plus Ron's quip about every bad witch or wizard has gone to Slytherin."
Loki's eyes lit up. "Oh, really? I imagine Lord Moldyshorts himself was a Slytherin when he was at Hogwarts?"
Harry nodded. "In my second year, he confirmed that he was the infamous Heir of Slytherin."
"Oh. Well, I doubt Ron will think any more highly of Slytherins with me around."
"Gods have mercy on them, Slytherin House will want to sleep with the light on," said Percy with a shudder. "What about the rest of you?"
"I'm a Gryffindor," said Hermione, "but the Sorting Hat thought for a while about putting me in Ravenclaw. Dean, Seamus, Neville and the Terrible Twins are all in Gryffindor."
"As for me, I'm a Ravenclaw," said Luna.
"Well, it looks like Percy, Annabeth, Thalia and I have not been Sorted … yet … so the rest of you go on ahead, and the rest of us will come in later."
~HALF BLOOD HARRY POTTER~
"Now that we have Sorted our first years into their Houses," said Dumbledore, "we have a few newcomers to Sort. Professor McGonagall, if you please?"
"Aye, Headmaster. Annabeth Chase?"
The Sorting Hat took a brief moment on her head before it said, "RAVENCLAW!"
"Percy Jackson?"
{Hmmm … slightly more difficult … aha, I know …} "HUFFLEPUFF!"
Professor McGonagall's eyes widened as she looked at the last two names on the list. When was the last time in living memory that Hogwarts had sorted a married couple? Also, the look in Loki's eyes sent a shiver up her spine ...
"Lord Loki Palmer and his Lady, Thalia?"
{Well, I can't say it is everyday that I get the chance to Sort a married couple … hmm … a tough call, I would say … while it would be tempting to put you both in Gryffindor, given your bravery, I think you don't want or need a power struggle with Lord Potter … the Big Guy and the Rich One do not get along well, as a matter of fact …}
"Yes, I know," thought Loki to the Sorting Hat, "the last time the Big Three had demigod children, the aforementioned children brought the world with them into World War II."
{Indeed so. Well, a cordial friendship between demigod children of the Big Three is a great sight indeed, so let us thank the gods for small miracles … but where to put …}
The Sorting Hat emitted a small chuckle, while Dumbledore frowned.
"Does something amuse you?"
"Why, yes, Headmaster, I believe I have decided where to Sort these two … but you aren't going to like it ..."
"Whatever. GET ON WITH IT!"
{At least I tried to warn the Headmaster.} "The Hogwarts House in which Loki Palmer and Lady Thalia will reside will be ..."
Professor Snape's face paled as he felt a wave of horror pass over him and he prayed to all the gods, "Please don't say Slytherin, please don't say Slytherin ..."
"SLYTHERIN!"
If Professor Snape's long mental yell of terror was a vocal one, it would have sounded across the entirety of the United Kingdom and Ireland: "D'OHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
The gods of Olympus and the Lord of the Underworld had not answered his prayer; instead, they were roaring with laughter at the outcome of Loki and Thalia's Sorting!
Author's Note: Another fun chapter. Read and review!
Smiles and laughter,
Loki Palmer