"Have compassion for all beings, rich and poor alike; each has their suffering. Some suffer too much, others too little."

- Buddha

Seashells

Shepard disliked the memorial wall. Every name on it reminded her of her mistakes, and in Ashley's case, her selfishness.

It was a dangerous mission. Everyone knew the risks. Shepard, of all people, knew she would have to make a difficult decision at some point. But she had never thought she would have to choose between her close friend and...

She told everyone she rescued Kaidan instead of Ashley because he was the superior officer. But it was a lie. The real reason behind her decision was she couldn't lose him.

Every time she looked at Ashley's nameplate on the memorial wall, she felt guilty.

Stepping back from the wall, she looked at the newest nameplate. Tears threatened to fall but she bit her lip to prevent them.

Garrus patted her shoulder. "He was a good guy."

"I shouldn't have let him go." Shepard hated showing weakness, but he had been her friend.

Seeing the Commander in this state made Garrus feel both sad and uncomfortable. It seemed the war was finally taking its toll on her.

"You should rest, Shepard." He didn't know what to do. "When was the last time you slept, or ate?"

Shepard shook her head. "I can't do either. Every time I tried to sleep, I have nightmares and I vomit everything I eat."

If this continued, Shepard might fall before the war ended.

"I think you should talk to Dr. Chakwas. You have to take care of yourself. We won't win this war without Commander Shepard."

Garrus was always right. Shepard smiled dryly and nodded.

"It isn't easy... I'll try."

The turian was still looking at his friend as she walked toward the med bay. She turned back to look at the nameplate for the last time.

On the plate was the name: Mordin Solus.

The pair of ancient hammers was drumming a battle symphony. Each time they rang, Shepard felt her heart drumming to keep up with the beat.

Far away, two ancient and powerful creatures were fighting. Kalros, the mother of all thresher maws grabbed the Reaper destroyer with her massive mouth. The Reaper fought back by tossing her against the Shroud. Her long body hit the skyscraper, causing an earthquake and explosion.

Wounded, Kalros loosened her grip and went back under Tuchanka's surface.

This wasn't the end. The Reaper looked around for the enormous worm, prepared for another round.

Shepard couldn't move as Kalros reappeared. The great mother hurled toward the Reaper with all her might. Her enemy tried to flee but it was too late. Kalros wrapped her body around the machine like a python. The Commander swore she could hear the sound of broken joints as Kalros tightened her embrace.

It didn't take long before the Reaper stopped moving altogether. The enormous worm dragged her prey underground with her.

Who would have thought? The worm had defeated the powerful machine!

Shepard had another task to finish. As soon as her legs remembered how to move, the Commander ran to the Shroud. Without the Convoy, she had almost lost an hour running her marathon toward her destination.

Mordin was already there, between the explosion and collapsing chaos. His face showed no emotion but his hands were dancing wildly on the console.

"Everything is ready. But the temperature is too high. Need to lower it down," the salarian said before she even asked.

"Okay, but how we do that?"

He smiled as he pointed upward. "The console is in the top floor."

"But the tower is collapsing!" If he went to the top floor, it would be a one-way trip. "There must be something we can do. Don't do this Mordin."

The Shroud had been sabotaged long ago. Their plan to spread the cure wouldn't succeed if they didn't get rid of that sabotage. Shepard understood, but she really didn't want to lose anyone.

"Has to be me," Mordin smiled.

Some time ago, he told her about his life. The doctor was in the last period of his life. He hadn't had much time left. If he survived the war, he wanted to go to the beach.

'Walk on the beach. Collect seashells.'

Tears fell down her cheeks, but Shepard ignored them. "Someone else might have gotten it wrong."

The good doctor nodded. "When Butterfly comes back, tell her... Grandpa's sorry."

"I will tell her. I promise." She saluted him until the elevator carried him away from her sight.

She didn't want to leave, but the collapsing building didn't give her a choice. Shepard ran from the building as fast as she able while the whole place fell.

Shepard jerked awake. Dr. Chakwas gave her a pill and promised a dreamless sleep, but it wasn't true.

She dreamed of Tuchanka. In her mission to cure the genophage, Mordin died. It was odd, though. A person from the race that created the virus sacrificed himself to cure it once and for all.

Eve or Urdnot Bakara said his bravery would be told among her people. Wrex even thought about naming one of his children after the salarian.

Mission accomplished, but there was no celebration. Somehow it didn't feel right.

"The krogans will go to war. It is the time we stop wasting our lives and do the best thing we can do and fight the giant monster," Wrex promised. "When Butterfly returns, bring her here and we will have a party. Urz would like her."

"Animals always are attracted to her. I don't think the varren will be an exception." Thinking about her daughter brought her a small smile.

Kaidan went after her and had lost communication. Shepard began to worry.

However, her train of thought was cut by a call. Via the intercom, Traynor informed her. "The Salarian councilor wants to speak with you, Commander."

That was... odd. Shepard had a bad feeling about the call.

Thank to The Lonely Traveler for beta. o