Critical Screening

Chapter 25

"Just forget about you and me for a second. What about Meredith? What about Alex and Christina? Who's gonna hold us together if you're not here? You're the glue. You George." Izzie insisted for not only herself but her friends and co workers around her. "I can't stay here." George replied modestly, slightly ignoring her glances.

"No one's making you go." Izzie replied. "I can't stay here and see you everyday, and I... I can't keep kissing you in elevators." "I know, I know that." But did she really know? Did Izzie Stevens really know or understand that George couldn't keep kissing his best friend in elevators during the day then go home to his wife at night?

And was it because he was married or because they were best friends? And maybe Izzie was pleading more for herself for George to stay rather then everyone else, but still, it mattered. She loved him and in the end you know he loves her to. Sound familiar?

The constant struggle of finding the truth, or admitting it, maybe even believing it? It wasn't always easy, or notable. Maybe you can't find it on the top layer, but its deep down, otherwise everything would be made of lies, which doesn't make much of love, compassion or friendship would it?

"Go ahead believing what ever you want to believe Ian." Charlie spat in a daze. She looked out in every direction that Ian didn't inhabitant. "So is there a reason you're here?" She questioned finally. She flipped her head around her soft hair swinging through the breeze as Ian's hand brushed across her thigh and sat there quietly.

And just as quickly as his hand brushed against her thigh, that same hand grabbed her face filled with lust as he pressed his lips against hers. There lips only parted for a quick second before they were back together their tongues dancing, to the music that didn't exist. And as the feeling of the world drifting away returned to Charlie Radin's body she pulled back because for those few moments absolutely nothing made sense, which is the exact opposite of what a kiss should do, what its suppose to do.

For moments she could feel herself trying to pull away but for some reason couldn't. But suddenly her eyes busted opened and pried her lips apart from his breaking the magnetic force. Before she could take a breath she stood up in a daze tripping over the street curb and began to walk away. "Don't you love me anymore?" Ian called to her. Charlie Radin turned around, popped her right hip and stared at him.

His voice was sarcastic and sly but his face was so venerable and she couldn't decide what he meant by it. "your insane Ian." Charlie said with her arms raised, sounder meaner then intended. She waited a moment and continued walking towards her house. Without turning around she knew he was still there just looking at her ass as she walked. "Go home." She cried before locking her front door shut behind her.

The next day loomed over Charlie as the morning sun woke her earlier then usual. She wasn't sure if she should be thankful it was over, sad because it was ending or just relived. But Charlie Radin found her self looking less and less forward to the hours ahead of her. While most seniors looked forward to the last day of high school, Charlie didn't.

She parked in the student parking lot and walking along the entrance way, that was virtually empty. The naïve freshman and egotistically sophomores were absent; several mindless juniors walked the halls but by most Scrathmore Academy were filled with seniors, talking and smiling, some taking pictures and signing year books but all with a subtle mood about them.

The seemed to ring too fast as Charlie's heart seemed to skip a beat it didn't seem right the way things were going because for the next three months she would go to party after party, hanging out with those people who had only recently let her in, she would say goodbye to the people who never meant anything to her, and not say anything to those who do, then she would leave to another place, another city, another year where no one knew her name or would stare as she walked by, hear whispers at her slight glance or hoping to hook up because of what they heard and things would be different, but Charlie wasn't really sure if she wanted that.

It all seemed too depressing for a teenager to go through, yet she knew the tears that come from someone, just not herself. Just as the bell rang for a second time signally that Charlie was now late a second blonde was dashing by her. "Emma! Em." Charlie called instinctively. "Oh Hey Charlie." Emma said slowly turning around just outside the homeroom doorway. "I was just um… wondering have you talked to Ian Rowland lately." "Hmm, just for a little while last night, he said he had some stuff to do." Charlie nodded carefully. "Why?" Emma continued.

"Well it's just… I know Ian comes off as a real good guy and stuff but he can be a real jackass, a lot of the time." Emma grunted under her breath and rolled her eyes. "Look, I know that you and Ian have your stuff, and history but I'm different, besides that last year." Charlie bit her tongue. "Em." There was silence between and slight grin crossed her face.

"You want him back don't you? Since you and Kale called it quits your regretting telling me no?" Charlie's eyes widened ten times its normal size. Kale walked by his eyes glistening with the words but his head stayed forward as he walked into the classroom. "No Emma, I'm just…" "Looking out for a friend?" She grunted.

"Yeah Sure." She smiled. "Bye Charlie." Suddenly Emma's quirkiness and slight dumbness faded away and she mimicked those terms of Amanda Hilfiger. As Charlie walked into homeroom she felt all eyes on her, how had this day of so called celebration turned into another day all about her?

"So you did decide to grace us with your presence Miss. Radin." Mr. Peters said checking her name off of the attendance sheet. "Lucky you." She grunted under her breath.

She looked at Kale, his cold eyes staring back into hers but for a split second that chill that he held softened and you could almost see a smile among his face.

She sat down slumping down in her seat. Amanda Hilfiger didn't bother spitting any sarcastic comments are her this morning, after the conversation days before. Did she do something wrong and hadn't known it? The chill in the air wasn't coming from Kale anymore it was like the hallways of the actually building was freezing her out, just waiting for her to leave.

"I just want to say one thing." Mr. Peters began. "Good Luck, it's a tough world out there, much tougher then inside these sheltered walls." He glanced at Charlie, slightly only slight enough for the quickest eyes to see. "at least for some of you." The bell rang and the classroom erupted not like on other days as quick as possible but slowly, like every step was your last savoring it for what it was worth, which in the long run was nothing,

"Hey Charlie." A familiar voice said grabbing her hand. She turned around and let her eyes meet his. "Can I talk to you?" She nearly busted into a smile of suprsiment and nodded following Kevin Radin out into the hallway.

She hadn't talked to her brother in weeks, months and maybe it started even before that. You could cut it down to about two years that the twin had really talked, the way they use to at least. The joy on her face was unassuming.

The lines disappeared and the weapons were placed away for the time beings until it was heard of what he was going to say. The fuzzy musk of lies drew across the air, it was hard to tell the lie from the truth wasn't it? Confusing and masking because you always want to believe the ones you love, even if they are truly evil.