Disclaimer: I do not own CSI: or Nick Stokes. The whole episode 'Grave Danger' isn't mine either. I only own the idea and Morgan Lynn Rodriguez (She is mine).
EmSyd - Thank.s Here's some more. Sorry for the long delay.
jenn - Thanks. I hope you like this too. Sorry for the long delay.
Facing Grave Danger
Chapter 25
"It's been three weeks and he's still not getting out, Sofia." – Morgan said to the phone, entering the locker room. "He barely talks to me anymore either."
She was getting a little desperate. Nick would refuse to see the Lab's psychologist, which Morgan could understand, but he was, at the same time, closing all his doors to the rest of the world. He had signed for a three week-work leave and had spent almost every day of the three weeks that had already passed since his ordeal at home. When Morgan woke up, he would be there. When she left for work, he would be there. When she got home from work, he would be there. During the night, he would wake up time and time again. He was driving insane.
And he wasn't talking to her. Well, not talking, but they had been arguing pretty badly the last couple of days.
"I'm worried about him."
"You got to give him some space, Rodriguez..."
"I'm giving him all the space in the world. He came out with this idea of going to visit Gordon's daughter last night… I tried to get that crazy thought out of his head, but he's stubborn!"
"But why does he want to see her?"
"Ask him! I haven't figured that out yet either…" – Morgan commented, recalling the fight they had had the previous night.
(Flashback)
Morgan closed the door behind her and threw her bag to the nearest chair along with her keys. She took of her jacket and threw it as well. She headed to the kitchen to prepare herself some hot chocolate, the drink that had always had the gift of calming her. It had become a habit, something she would try to do everyday: drink a mug of hot chocolate before going to bed. It made her nights much easier to bear.
Carrying the mug on her hands, she was going to her room and noticed a weak light on Nick's room. She decided to go there and turned around, walking to his room instead.
She knocked on the door and opened it after his allowance. "Hey." – She greeted, sticking her head on the door. "May I?"
"Sure." – He answered. She entered the room and closed the door behind her, drinking a bit of the soft mixture of hot chocolate and a bit of sugar that she had just prepared to herself. "I thought you'd be asleep. It's late, Nick."
"I can't sleep." – He muttered, turning the page abruptly and not even looking at her. She sighed. "Nick…"
"What?"
"You can't go on like this." – She started, sitting by the bed. "You don't sleep, you barely eat, you're living almost locked inside these four walls. This is going to kill you; you have to get over it…"
He ignored her. She was starting to get used to it but that didn't mean she accept this attitude. She just… tolerated it because what he had lived had been really hard and well, because he was Nick.
"Have you considered going to see the Psychologist of the Department yet?" – She asked.
"No," was his dry answer. She was going to say something when he spoke again, revealing one idea of his that he had had during the past night. "I decided to go see Kelly Gordon in a couple of days."
"You're… what?" – She questioned. Her first instinct had been to shout at him if he was getting crazy but due to the circumstances, she had controlled herself instead.
"I decided to go see Kelly Gordon in a couple of days." – He repeated, his face and voice blank of any expression.
"Do you think that's reasonable?" – She asked. "I mean… why the hell would you want to see her anyway? She didn't know anything about what Walter was planning to do. Do you really think that's wise and it's going to make you any good?"
"Excuse-me Morgan, but the way I decide to live my life, the one that almost got stolen away from me three weeks ago, it's none of your damn business." – He snapped, in a low tone, peacefully continuing to read his book, as if he hadn't just snapped at her.
She just looked at him, shock and surprise all over her face; stress and frenzy all over her body, boiling on her blood. Then, wordlessly, she got up and walked out of his room, like a robot, closing the door harshly behind her.
(End of Flashback)
"So you simply left?"
"No, I stuck around for him to snap at me a little more…" – Morgan answered, ironically. "Of course I left… I wasn't going to stay there and listen to him going stupid like that. I may tolerate him a lot of stuff because of all that happened, but I'm not a masochist…"
"Right, right… sorry. Why did he snap at you that way?"
"I don't know. And I don't care, anyways… We've been arguing like hell lately. He's just closed to the rest of the world. I don't know if it's just with me or if it is with everyone else… I'm losing my patience, Sofia." – She confessed.
"It's got to be something with everyone else. Why would he just pick you to snap and be all-aggressive at? It doesn't make sense… He's just disturbed. You got to give him some time and space…"
"If you were in my place, you'd think twice before saying that, Curtis…" – Morgan said, putting down her bag and opening her locker with her free hand. "Now, I have to go to work… talk to you later."
"Take it easy, Rodriguez…" – Sofia advised.
"I am... but I don't know if I can hang on this 'nice Morgan' role for much longer…"
(The Next Evening)
Nick heard a little noise coming from Morgan's room when he got home from a brief walk he had decided to take. Figuring she should be leaving in some minutes, he thought this would be the best time to try to solve things out. The last couple of days had been awful, since she had barely spoke to him, making him feel even more alone and lost than usual, since that terrifying day.
"Who can blame her anyway?" – He said to himself. Hadn't he been the one to snap at her?
He gained some courage to face her before knocking briefly on the door of her room. She apparently didn't hear him, as he understood that the music could be a little loud. He opened the door and peeped inside. Nick saw her sitting at her bed, her back against the wall, looking at something she had on her hands. She seemed much focused on whatever it was and with the music coming from the sound system on her side, she hadn't noticed him yet. He took a moment to pay attention to the music: the voice seemed so familiar. It was a boy and a girl, singing some song he had never heard before. It had to be an acoustic version, since the sound of all the instruments was not totally aligned.
"May I?" – Nick asked, after a few minutes during which his attention had been caught up by the chemistry that flown between the boy and the girl that were singing. Despite being only hearing the voices, he could understand that they worked greatly together, as a duet, and seemed to be more than just partners, since the passion that they expressed seemed to connect them both very strongly.
She looked up from the picture and he could see some angst on her eyes. However, she tried to disguise it. "Oh. Yeah, sure…" – She answered, distantly, hurrying to turn the picture around and put it down on her bedside table. She turned down the music's volume too and sat back up straight on the bed, as he approached her.
"I… hmm… I have to…" – Nick started, a little fearlessly. He had noticed a big backpack set, resting near the end of the bed.
"Do you want me to go somewhere and leave you here alone for a couple of days?" – She questioned, cutting him off. "Do you want me to move out?"
"What?" – He asked, caught in surprise by her question. "No!"
"I mean… Nick, I understand that you need some space, you're affected, and all that stuff. Nevertheless, what I don't understand and what I won't be able to handle much longer is your refuse to fight and get over what happened. I can't watch someone destroying himself that way… I'm sorry, but I can't do that. So, I already have some stuff packed and I've talked to Sofia… I can stay at her apartment for a while, until you get yourself together again or until I find one of my own… which I've been postponing for a quite a while, more than I should have."
"No… wait, I don't want to you to move out…" – Nick murmured, a little stunned about what she had just said. "I… I need you here, Morgan."
She sighed and got up, walking to the place where he stood, not moving even a cell. "Nick, you've been snapping at me for nothing, you don't let me help you and now you want to go see that psycho… I don't know what to do. I want to help you, I can't stand seeing you this way, but I don't know what to do. And maybe it's better if I leave you alone for some time, for you to decide and handle things on your own."
"Please... don't." – He started. "I can't handle things on my own… I just… can't."
"Why do you want to see Gordon's daughter?" – She asked, looking deep into his eyes.
"I don't know. That's something I'll only find out when I get there." – He answered, sincerely. Nick really didn't know why he wanted to visit Kelly Gordon or what he was going to say to her if she agreed to see him. It was just something he felt he had to do. "There's something inside of me, screaming for me to see her… I have so many questions Morgan; so many questions without an answer."
"Life's like that, Nicky." – She said, walking closer to him and briefly pressing her lips against his forehead. "Sometimes, we spend years asking ourselves old questions, time and time again, for which we'll never get an answer…" – She passed her hand through his hair and then touched his cheek, caressing it for a moment. "I'll drive you there, tomorrow."
He looked at her, confused. "You're coming with me?"
"Be ready when I come back from work… There was no way in Hell I'd let you go there alone. I'm going with you." – She said, firmly, in a confident way that made a little smile appear on his lips. "Now I have to go to the Lab… Call me if you need anything, okay?"
Nick nodded. She turned to reach for her leather jacket and, with a last brief caress on his shoulder, she was gone. Nick noticed that she hadn't remembered to turn off the music, so he walked to her bedside table to unplug the sound system. Then, he saw the picture she was looking at when he had entered the room.
Unable to control his curiosity, he picked up the picture and read what as written on the back. "Jordan, LJ, Tommy, Lynn and Michael" were the names that someone had written, with a black pen. Then, there was a date, the same date that Nick had already seen on the tattoo that crossed Morgan's right arm, below the scar. "July 21st 2001."
"What the hell happened in this date?" – He wondered, as he turned the picture around, to see a group of five teenagers smiling at him. From left to right, he saw three guys, the first one holding a bass guitar and the third one, the one who was right on Morgan's side, holding a pair of drumsticks. On the right side of the picture, next to the person holding the drumsticks, there was Morgan and another guy. He had a messy dark brown hair, that reached his shoulders and his eyes were green. His right arm was confidently around Morgan's waist as her left was around his neck. They seemed close to each other, very close indeed.
Something caught Nick's attention. In the back of the picture, there was a stage prepared for a concert, with all the instruments: two electrical guitars, a drum set, a keyboard and an empty spot, he assumed for the bass guitar the guy on the left was holding.
That moment, Nick realized that it wasn't just a picture of a group of five teenage friends, hanging out in a bar. He noticed how happy she looked in the picture, her smile wide open like he had never seen before. She didn't have any angst in her eyes. There was no sign of hurt or pain or anything. She was different. She looked young and relaxed… and most of all, happy. She was wearing a green spaghetti strapped top and there was no scar at all in her shoulder, neither was there any tattoo.
Then, it hit him. The words that were being sung by those two voices while he was looking at that picture made him realize what it meant. Made him understand whose voice it was, who was singing that song.
I guess I was trying to keep me alive Kiss me, is this a dream?
But once I was dead there was nothing to do beside
Picking me up and lying me down
Waiting for some angel
To wake me and say to me
"Hello. Don't be scared. I want you to know, you're not dead."
Should I believe it?
Please promise to me that I'm not going to get hurt this time.
Am I real? Are you real? Is this real? What's real?
Am I real? Are you real? Is this real?
Tell me, what's real?
"You had a band… and they were like a part of your family." – He said, quietly, to himself. "What the hell happened on this date that made you leave everything behind and come to Vegas?"
A/N: I apologize for the long delay, but since I started working, I've been barely having time to write. I have to balance school and work and writing this has become difficult. But I'll try my best to update it. I promise. Oh! And I have to add something to the 'Disclaimer' note: the words in italic, the lyrics for the song that was playing in this scene, don't belong to me. The song's called 'Angel Song' and belongs to Silence 4, a portuguese band that is already extinct. I used them because I really like them and this song in particular. No profit intended! Anyways, I'll explain the meaning of those lyrics later on. Stay tuned!
A/N2: Merry Christmas to you all:) And a Happy New Year!