Day Seven, 9 a.m. - Tuesday
Wilson didn't sleep well Monday night. He chalked it up to the summer heat and humidity.
After they all got settled in the following morning, the panel chairman resumed the questioning.
"Good morning, Dr. Wilson," said the panel chairman. "I trust you slept well."
"Only so-so," replied Wilson, honestly, wiping perspiration from his forehead. "This heat is miserable." He smiled.
"We heartily agree with that. Let's get to it, shall we? Dr. Wilson, we have heard from some of Dr. House's fellows about the injuries he suffered in a 2008 bus crash and the excessive measures he took to try to save two patients' lives. We have also heard from them that, at the time, he underwent several highly dangerous procedures, including taking physostigmine and undergoing a deep brain stimulation. Would that mesh with your recollections?"
"Yes, it would."
"We understand that he suffered a heart attack from the physostigmine, and that the deep brain stimulation caused seizures and briefly left him in a coma. Is that also correct?"
"Yes it is. He also had a seizure after spending time in a sensory deprivation tank."
"Noted. Could you give us your version of how he came to undergo the deep brain stimulation?"
"When I realized that the patient Greg had been trying to remember was my girlfriend, Amber Volakis, I asked that her body temperature be cooled down to give us more time to find a way to save her life."
"Was this delaying tactic successful?"
"Ultimately, no. When it became apparent that she had systemic failure of her kidneys and heart, and that her brain had been affected, I became desperate to find a way to save her. I asked Greg if he would do the DBS to try to access any buried memories he might have from the bus crash that could help."
"Was the deep brain stimulation your idea?"
"No. Initially, it was Greg's, but Lisa - Dr. Cuddy - refused to approve the procedure, saying that it could be too dangerous for someone who had already had a concussion and a skull fracture, not to mention the heart attack."
"What changed her mind about it?"
"..."
"Dr. Wilson?"
"Actually, we never told her."
"The procedure was done behind Dr. Cuddy's back?"
"Yes, it was." His nemesis rolled her eyes again.
"How did the topic come up again after the first time, when Dr. Cuddy had already expressed her disapproval?"
"When I became desperate enough, I… I asked Greg to do it."
"What was his response to this request?"
"If I remember correctly, he said, 'You want me to risk my life to save hers?' - or words to that effect."
"And you said...?"
"Yes. I said yes." Wilson closed his eyes for a moment, seeing for the first time that traumatic moment from Greg's perspective, as opposed to his own. What would I have said if he'd asked me to risk my life for Stacy or Cuddy? Would I have been willing to do it?
"Were you at all concerned about the dangers to Dr. House that Dr. Cuddy had mentioned earlier?"
"I wish I could say that I was thinking clearly enough for that, but I was really too frantic about trying to save my girlfriend to give it much thought."
He suddenly felt sick. It was one thing for him to voluntarily donate part of his liver to his selfish ex-friend, but quite another to be asked to risk his life, not even for a friend, but for the loved one of a friend. Just how would I have felt if Greg had asked me that same question, if he had made it clear he valued someone else's life over my own? Especially if that someone else was a person Greg had been involved with for only a few months, as opposed to our more than a decade of friendship?
Knowing what he now knew about just how much House was willing to give up for their friendship, that moment all those years ago took on new meaning. Wilson swallowed convulsively for a moment. After a few deep gasps of air, he felt a little better, which was good, because the questioning continued, despite his own inner turmoil.
"Who actually performed the DBS? Was that you?"
With a start, Wilson pulled his attention back to the questioner. "No. It was Dr. Chase, one of Dr. House's fellows."
"But you were present during the procedure."
"Yes, I was."
"What happened during and after the procedure?"
"House remembered seeing Amber - Dr. Volakis - take amantadine - that's flu medicine - on the bus. Because of her other injuries, it could not be filtered by her kidneys, and there was no way to save her."
"Do you recall if Dr. House said anything to you when he remembered what Dr. Volakis had taken and when he realized the significance of it?"
"Wow. I hadn't thought about this in a long time. He actually apologized to me. He said, 'I'm so sorry.'" House had apologized. And what had Wilson done to House, his friend who had risked his life to save Wilson's girlfriend? He'd told him they were no longer friends.
"You sound surprised. Was it unusual for Dr. House to apologize?"
"Unusual… but not unheard of." He had to concentrate, had to focus. He couldn't let these random emotional reactions distract him from the task at hand.
"After that, what happened?"
"Almost immediately after that, Greg had a grand mal seizure. Then he slipped into a coma."
"At what point did Dr. Cuddy become aware of what had happened?"
"I'm not sure. After Amber died, I saw her in House's room. She was holding Greg's hand." After staring into House's room for a moment, he had just walked away.
"Once Dr. House woke up from the coma, were there any after-effects of his injuries or the DBS?"
"I honestly don't know. For the next two months, I was on bereavement leave."
"So you never checked on Dr. House's condition after that?"
"No. I knew he was in the hospital when I left on my leave, and figured any medical issues would be treated by others."
"Did he attempt to contact you during that time?"
Wilson was startled. He hadn't considered it at the time, but House really had given him space. "No, he didn't."
"So, for all you knew, he was gravely injured… or perhaps even dead?"
Wilson took a sharp breath, feeling as if he was about to vomit. He took a few more deep breaths and tried to regain his composure. "I… I-I assume that if that were the case, s-someone would have told me." But while he was on leave, he hadn't even cared enough to find out.
"Were you still his primary care physician at this point?"
"Technically, yes, I was."
"Then how did he get his prescriptions filled? Were you available to him at all?"
"I don't know what was happening with him medically. I wasn't prescribing for him, nor was I available."
"How about your other patients?"
"Dr. Brown in my department took over their treatment while I was on leave."
"Was Dr. House the only patient under your care who had not been consulting with you in your capacity as an oncologist?"
"Correct."
"And he was the only one of your patients whose medical care you did not provide for while on leave?"
"…Yes. That's accurate."
The woman on the left spoke up. Wilson was beginning to dread hearing her questions.
"I recognize that this must have been a difficult time for you, but I need to ask: Did you face any legal or medical consequences for endangering your friend's life by authorizing such a dangerous and unapproved medical procedure?"
"No, I did not."
"Did Dr. Cuddy put you on suspension or discipline you in any other way?"
"No… I think she knew how traumatic losing Amber had been for me."
The woman continued.
"Only a couple more questions, Dr. Wilson, and then we will break for lunch. We have heard from others that one of Dr. House's approaches to medicine was to keep his distance from patients so that he could retain his objectivity. Do you find it at all.. shall we say, ironic… that in your dealings with Dr. House as your patient, your relationship with him seems to have interfered with your ability to treat his medical conditions objectively?"
"I suppose it is ironic. But he chose me as his physician. It was his choice."
"Yes, of course it was. Just as it was your choice to fulfill that role. But back to my point. It also seems ironic that, of the many serious injuries Dr. House has suffered over the past few years, one of the most severe was a direct result of the DBS, which you yourself requested."
Yes, it is ironic, Wilson thought, although it had not really occurred to him before now. This woman's questions made him extremely uncomfortable. "I guess you're right, but he was willing to do it and, at the time, it seemed to be the only possible way to save Amber's life."
"I assume you thanked your friend profusely for his selfless and life-threatening act."
"House, selfless? That's not how I would describe him." Really? thought Wilson, wincing, as he heard the words come out of his mouth. Do I really believe that House wasn't selfless? House, who gave up literally everything in his life - his career, his name, his reputation, his income - to care for me when we believed I was dying… do I really believe that man was selfish?
"Dr. Wilson? Are you there?"
Wilson shook the thoughts away and refocused his attention on the panel.
"What other way but selfless could you describe someone who was willing to risk his life - his brain - for your friendship?"
"I-I don't know." Wow. House really had risked everything to try to save Amber, and only because his best friend asked him to do it. Why hadn't he seen it this clearly then? He had always functioned on the assumption that House was nothing if not selfish… but perhaps he hadn't read the situation objectively. It was so obvious now, in the light of how House behaved during his recent cancer scare, that House really could be selfless. Remarkably selfless. "Yes. Sorry. I guess I need to rephrase that. I would have to say that, at that time, I wouldn't have described him as selfless… I think I wasn't seeing things very clearly."
Wilson thrust the thought away again, remembering just how grief-stricken he had been when Amber was dying. Right this minute, in this overheated room, under the harsh fluorescent glare, he couldn't deal with the idea that he could have been so very wrong. He barely heard the next question.
"But you thanked him, I'm sure. Right, Dr. Wilson?"
Wilson opened his mouth, and at first nothing came out. Finally, he cleared his throat. "I'm sure he knew I appreciated it, but I don't believe I ever uttered those words. In fact, I was pretty upset with him at the time. I felt that his recklessness brought nothing but misery to the people around him, and that it had finally gotten someone killed, someone I cared about a great deal."
"What recklessness?" the woman asked him. "The only recklessness I've heard about so far was the reckless way Dr. House disregarded his own well-being to try to save two lives… and the reckless disregard you had for the life and well-being of a friend and patient."
"Be that as it may, he had been drinking before the accident," Wilson replied, suddenly defensive.
"So you equate his drinking with bringing misery and getting your girlfriend killed?"
"Yes, in a way. At least I did at that moment."
"If he had driven his car drunk and she had been killed as a result of that, I could understand your sentiments. Could you please clarify?"
Getting exasperated, and unwilling to go where his uneasy thoughts were leading him, Wilson explained the situation in short, curt phrases. "He was drinking. He called my house for a ride. Amber got the call, went to pick him up, but he refused to ride with her. He took the bus instead, but he was so drunk he forgot his cane. She got on the bus to return it to him… and then the accident happened."
"I see. So it was a chain of unforeseen circumstances that led to her death, only one of which was his drinking?"
"Yes. When I came back from my bereavement leave, I told him that I didn't blame him. But I did feel that if he wasn't such a reckless and self-destructive person, it might not have happened." Wilson suddenly felt the need to justify himself. "I… I was not in a good place at that time, and I certainly wasn't very objective, either about him or about what had happened."
"Is there anything else you'd like to add?"
"No."
"Okay, then we'll take a quick break and reconvene at 11 a.m., Dr. Wilson."
With relief, Wilson left the room.