Notes:

IFF - Identification of Friend or Foe

Sim're: "Sister of my sister, not intended for relations, refers to a dear friend's loved one

Siame - "one who is all", a loved one cherished above all others (Thessian)

STG - Salarian Special Tactics Group

Moments of Reflection

Miranda walked away from Dr T'Soni and focused on Jacob. Her thoughts, however, were far from the mission and she wanted to bounce some things off her fellow Cerberus operative while outside of the Normandy. As she approached, Garrus grumbled and stalked off. "This is a waste of our time. There's nothing new here."

Miranda raised an eyebrow in question as she looked to Jacob. "What's wrong with Garrus? He seems a bit on edge."

Jacob shrugged. "Not exactly sure, but I have a feeling it has something to do with Tali'Zorah. He seemed excited before going down to Haestrom, not so much since they've been back. I think on the original Normandy they were an item... before she went back to the Fleet and he became Archangel. Life didn't work out the way he planned, I guess.

Miranda sighed. "I can relate."

Jacob nodded in agreement, "Yeah. I know what you mean." He gave Miranda a meaningful glance as thoughts of their prior short affair ran through his mind.

Miranda actually looked repentant. "Yes. Well. I could have handled that better. And as I look back I realize I could have handled a lot of things better." She paused and looked at her teammate. "Jacob. What are your plans after the Omega-4 Relay?"

Jacob looked at her suspiciously, wondering if she was wanting to give a second go at their relationship. He had no interest in treading that path again. "After? You honestly think there'll be an after?"

Miranda decided to jump in with both feet and didn't hold anything back. Not like I have much to lose at this point. "Jacob. God help me, but I honestly think Shepard's going to get us through this. It might be completely crazy, but I believe in her." She shook her head. "I've not played my cards very well and I've been rather narrow-minded and irresponsible. I've realized rather late in the game that I inadvertently narrowed my future to a single career path... and I no longer like the road I'm on." She looked him straight in the eye. "I'm not going back to the Illusive Man when this is over."

Jacob's head came up in surprise. "Really? Huh. You would have been the last person I would have anticipated defecting. But don't worry. I won't rat you out." He laughed softly and continued. "Damn, Miranda. I really am surprised, and I didn't think you'd ever surprise me. You've always been so predictable. So...dedicated to the cause."

Miranda rolled her eyes. "Yes. But that was when the cause was well defined. I just feel somewhere along the way it went from the betterment of humanity to the betterment of Cerberus. I no longer trust in the organizational goals."

Jacob snorted. "You mean you no longer trust the Illusive Man."

Miranda's eyes got sharp and her tone biting. "Exactly. Especially after this last little fiasco."

"Yeah, well. Not sure what I'm doing after, but I'm not going back either. Shepard's my boss now. The Illusive Man doesn't get to hang me out to dry more than once, but I told him that from the start. Not gonna give him a chance for a repeat performance." Jacob shrugged his shoulders. "Depending on how it all works out, I might even go back to the Alliance. I'm sure they'll take me if Shepard puts in a good word."

After letting out a heavy sigh, Miranda suddenly exclaimed, "God. I need a drink."

Jacob let out a hardy laugh. "There's a bar in the living area. I've already been there." He smiled as he continued, pointing in the general direction. "Passageway on the left, past the kitchen, first hall to the right. About mid ship. Can't miss it. I'm sure you'll have company. The commandos hang out there when they take their breaks." Jacob was relieved when Miranda did not ask him to accompany her.

Miranda wandered away and found the bar easy enough. Jacob was right; couldn't miss it. The commandos were having a good time and all Miranda had to do was follow the noise. There were a number of games scattered around the edges of the rooms, seeming to cater to everyone. Made sense, since the past Broker recruited from practically every race in the galaxy. It gave each member of the team a taste of home. They even had a dart board and a pool table. It was a shame it was all going to crash and burn into Hagalaz to keep it out of the hands of the Illusive Man. Miranda couldn't argue with the logic, but perhaps before that happened they could steal the card table and install it in the lounge on the Normandy. She headed straight to the bar and ordered a drink, asking how much. The Asari tending bar laughed. "You can tip me with a kiss if your drink comes out ok, because I'm not a professional barkeep, but other than that, the drinks are on the house. You only pay if you get drunk and do something stupid. Broker benefits for being locked on a ship in the middle of nowhere."

Miranda chuckled. "In that case, I'll make it easy. Whiskey, on the rocks."

The Asari made a face and poured a tumbler. "Goddess. I don't know how Humans drink that stuff. Just the smell almost makes me gag." She shoved the glass to Miranda with a look of distaste.

Miranda picked up the glass and smiled. "You don't drink it, you sip it. And you don't like it because it doesn't have either eezo or sugar. It's just different than what you're used to." She took her whiskey and found a small table in the corner of the room and sat down, swirling the glass just to hear the click of the ice against the side. She stared through the amber brown liquid, occasionally taking a sip, and just thought about what she'd do if Liara decided she didn't fit into the Shadow Broker's plans. Just as she was deciding that she didn't really have many options where the Illusive Man couldn't easily hunt her down and have her assassinated, a pair of distinctive white and gray commando leathers moved into her peripheral vision and a familiar voice asked, "May I join you?"

"Certainly. I don't mind sharing a table. I didn't realize the place was getting full." Miranda glanced up and realized there were many empty tables yet available. "Oh... I guess that's not the case."

Judea smiled. "No, it's not. Is it wrong to want to sit with a beautiful woman who seems to have a lot on her mind? And who might need a friend to act as a sounding board?"

As he stalked off, Garrus contemplated where he might go. Tali was on the Broker ship working with Feron, and Garrus didn't want to risk running into her in the more relaxed, casual setting between missions. He wasn't sure yet exactly what to think about her relationship with Kal'Reegar. He and Tali had talked, but they hadn't talked about THAT. His mind slipped back in time to the original Normandy. Being the only two dextro-based life forms on board, he and Tali had spent a lot of time together at meal time, cooking and sharing their special meals, and had become quite close. Garrus felt they had come to an unspoken arrangement, though neither was ever so forward as to actually refer to the other as a boyfriend or girlfriend. He remembered the time on Feros like it was yesterday, when Tali had been taken down by a Geth Prime and suffered a severe suit breach along with a gunshot wound. Every step seemed to take forever as he rushed back to the Normandy, carrying her unconscious form in his arms while Ashley Williams provided cover fire. He had thought he was going to lose her that day, yet he still didn't have the courage to tell her how he felt.

He looked around and realized he had wandered all the way back to the docking bay without even realizing it. He knew Tali and Feron were here somewhere working to adapt the barrier technology for the future Broker platforms, so promptly turned around and worked his way back to the Operations Center; he still had work to do. While walking the length of the ship for a second time, his mind wandered some more. First, his thoughts touched on Virmire and how guilty he felt when he was relieved that Kaidan was selected to prep the nuke, and not Tali. It wasn't that he was glad Kaidan had died, but he couldn't be sorry that Tali had lived. With her technical knowledge, it might very well have been Tali that died in the explosion instead of Alenko. Even though Garrus and Tali both made it safely back on the ship that day, they had lost a friend and as they held one another for comfort that night, it seemed an inappropriate time for either one of them to share the potentially deeper feelings in their hearts. It never occurred to Garrus that it was possibly just the social nature of the Quarian people and that Tali felt nothing more than a close friendship with the Turian.

When the war was over, Garrus thought things might actually take a turn in the right direction. Then, the original Normandy was destroyed and Tali had opted to return to the Migrant Fleet and close out her pilgrimage; staying around the Normandy crew had been too painful a reminder for Tali to bear. Again, Garrus had said nothing and Tali simply walked out of his life. The next two years had been a whirlwind as he buried himself in his work with Liara and the House T'Soni commandos in their hunt for Shepard... until the fateful day on Omega when Liara decided to hand Shepard's body over to Cerberus. Then Garrus turned his frustrations against the riff-raff of Omega and built a crime-fighting team, only to have it destroyed by a traitor he had yet to find; a fellow Turian by the name of Lantar Sidonis. He thought of Tali frequently during those days, but he never reached out to her. He didn't reach out to anyone, because he was too embarrassed by what had transpired... both for abandoning Liara and Shepard, and then not seeing Sidonis for what the bastard was and getting Garrus' whole team wiped out. He shook his head when he realized what a fool he had been. Now, he stood once more in the Operations Center and realized he could never interfere with Tali's happiness. And if she has found that with Kal'Reegar, then so be it. One thing I can fix, though, is to find Lantar Sidonis and erase the stain he left on the quality of Turian character.

Much more focused than he was before his walk, Garrus got to work searching the Shadow Broker databases. He knew Shepard was getting close to leading the Normandy through the Omega-4 Relay, and while he may not be able to find a direction for his personal life before then, Garrus was committed to at least cleaning up the last of his screwed up business dealings. With a final shake of his head and a bit of new-found determination, he headed to the terminal containing the entire collection of Shadow Broker dossiers and started digging.

Liara practically dragged Shepard into her private quarters, then spun and kissed her with great enthusiasm before the door was even completely closed. "I am very happy to see you uninjured, Siame. You must tell me how it all went."

The commander filled her in on the Collector vessel and that it actually had been a trap and that TIM had known all along. She shook her head and sighed. "I think I'm starting to get tired, Li. My patience is definitely lacking. First, hanging up on the Council, and now ripping into TIM. If I'm not careful, we won't have any allies left."

She rotated her shoulders in an attempt to loosen tense muscles and let out a deep sigh before plopping down into a chair and finishing her account of the conversation with TIM. "So, Tali is passing on the schematics for the new barrier system, then going to have Feron help her data mine for anything they can find on the derelict Reaper and this IFF. Miranda may help them, because she's starting to run into roadblocks in Cerberus channels. We think TIM is slowly removing her access to the more sensitive projects. I think he's realized she's supporting us now, so she's no longer his golden child. And Garrus is hitting up the personnel dossiers, trying to get a trace on both Sidonis and Thane's son. There's so much yet to do and I feel like we're running out of time."

The commander leaned forward and placed her elbows on her knees and rubbed her head briefly, before just sitting still with her forehead resting on her hands. Liara looked at her with concern, her initial reasons for wanting Samantha somewhere private falling to the wayside. "Shepard? Have you eaten or slept since you woke up in the med bay on the Normandy?"

"What?" The commander didn't move, but sounded honestly confused by the sudden change of topic from business to personal matters.

Liara huffed. "You haven't, have you?" She moved over behind Samantha's chair, typing a quick message on her omnitool as she walked, and then pulled Shepard upright in the chair and started to massage her shoulders, neck and chest. "First things first, then. Food. Rest. Then discussion. You're exhausted." Shepard sat there, eyes closed, leaned her head back against Liara's stomach and offered no protest. It wasn't long before the door chimed and Liara grabbed Shepard's hand and made her get up to move to a small corner table. She then went to the door and let Arlyna in. She had brought three package meals and they all sat down together and ate.

Shepard asked Arlyna how she was settling in and if she could see doing it for the duration of the Reaper war. Arlyna was serious when she answered. "I have found a place here easily enough but I don't know, Sim're. It will depend on the war. From what we have found in the databanks thus far, the Protheans took centuries to be defeated. I honestly do not know if I have the fortitude for a three-hundred year war. Not that any of us will really have any choice in the matter."

Shepard offered up a tired smile. "Then we need to find a way to win it quicker than that, don't we? We can't have you quitting on us because you get bored."

Arlyna looked surprised and Liara laughed as she followed up. "Welcome to the world of the eternal optimist."

As they finished up their meals, Arlyna gave a knowing nod to Liara and tipped her head toward Shepard. With a full stomach and no sleep for two days, the commander was fighting a losing battle to stay awake. Arlyna slipped out quietly with an assurance from Liara that she could handle the commander. Liara leaned down and gently tucked some loose hair up behind Samantha's ear before kissing her softly on the forehead. "Samantha." Liara whispered. "Come to bed, love."

"Hmm?" The commander's eyes cracked open and she got a bashful smile on her face. "Probably a good idea, before I fall asleep sitting right here, huh?" She blinked a few times and stood, still half asleep and somewhat unsteady on her feet. Liara took a hold of her arm to steady her and led her to the bedroom, helped her get undressed and into bed. Shepard mumbled, "Guess I was more tired than I thought..."

Liara slipped in next to her and shook her head. "It's no wonder. You never let yourself rest, and you never let your body heal completely before jumping into the next fight. Just look at you." Propped up on an elbow, a finger tip on Liara's free hand traced Samantha's marred skin. "When you came back to me, all your previous scars were gone. Now, you have a new battle map on your body." Her finger traced down a jagged slash on Samantha's right side and hip. "I know you got this on Omega, from charging that Krogan on your way to dispense the cure for the plague." Her hand moved to the opposite shoulder. "And you always lead with your left... so all these impacts..." Her finger teased over multiple small scars from various calibers, scattered across her left shoulder and side. "... are from when you are approaching the enemy. You always wait too long to duck when your shields start to fail." Liara frowned and shook her head. "Already so many, Samantha, and the war has barely begun."

Shepard's eyes were closed, but she smiled as she whispered, "You've seen me fight, Blue. You know those small caliber weapons are more an annoyance than anything. And those are all from getting Garrus off Omega and Jack out of Purgatory. Nothing like having an entire station trying to kill you. Twice. Great practice for the Collector ship and totally worth it."

Liara lifted Shepard's right arm and pressed her lips to a long gash. "And what of this on your forearm?"

Shepard chuckled quietly. "That one made me think of you. I charged in to a group of Hock's security, and there were more of them around the corner that I didn't see until too late. Ended up in a serious melee. Made me think of the time you smacked me on the back of my helmet for not paying attention."

Liara tried unsuccessfully to appear angry. "That is because you are often reckless, Commander. You need to set the example, but preferably a good one." Liara shook her head and sat up. "Now. Roll over onto your stomach and I will give you a massage."

Shepard smiled and grunted as she flopped over. "Not gonna turn down an offer like that."

Liara ran her hands lightly across Shepard's shoulders, letting her biotics flare gently to provide warmth and vibration without putting any heavy physical pressure on the commander's back. Her fingers glanced over Shepard's biotic implant at the base of her skull. "Does this hurt you at all?" Liara frowned as her fingers trailed down the remnants of a pseudo-electrical burn that ran from the implant halfway down Shepard's spine from the overload caused by Object Rho.

Shepard didn't answer the question, but tensed at the reminder of the mental invasion. "Liara." The Asari could feel the turmoil in Shepard's mind as easily as the sudden resurgence of tension in the commander's muscles as she continued. "If anything ever gets into my head... you can't hesitate. Promise me."

The implication of what Shepard was saying made Liara's chest ache and she found it hard to draw breath as memories of her mother's death suddenly flashed through her mind. "No. I won't." Angry tears slipped down her face as she shook her head. "You cannot ask me to promise such a thing, Siame." Shepard went to turn over, but Liara held her in place as she continued speaking. "No. You are asking me to commit suicide, because I would not survive without you, especially knowing I was the one to pull the trigger. I will do anything for you but that... and I will not give you a false promise I would have no intention of keeping. Could you promise such a thing to me?"

Shepard sighed and tried in vain to relax again, the fear still clawing at her conscience. "No. I couldn't. It just... scares me, Li. To think of the damage I could do if they manage it."

Liara suddenly smiled, struck by a flash of insight. "Shepard. They will not be fighting just you. We have always said that together we can accomplish anything. I will not break faith with that now, or ever. When the time comes, I will be with you. I will turn the Aletheia over to someone and join you on the Normandy. We will guard each other's thoughts through the link and they will not conquer our combined minds."

Liara felt Samantha relax slightly under her touch and she resumed her massage as the commander spoke, an answering smile in her voice. "I like the sound of that, Dr T'Soni. Speaking of which, who are you thinking of, besides Feron?"

"Riana acted as my assistant on Illium, after Nyxeris, but I doubt I could get her to forego her position as First. So, when I join the Normandy, you get her as well." Liara started just thinking out loud. "Arlyna is very quick, and has proven exceptionally adept at filtering data and finding critical information. I was already thinking of placing her and Niria on the Chiroquol. We also need someone much better at financials. I was thinking of elevating one of the agents..."

Shepard laughed. "Barla Von."

Liara smirked. "Exactly! But I don't think I want him as a primary, so I'll put him with Arlyna and of course, Niria. I know you trust them completely, so I'll trust them to keep him under control. For the same reason, I'll put Livos Tanni with Feron. And, I'll talk with Livos to see how she recommends splitting the team across the three ships. As soon as she gives me an answer, we can launch the Rakhana and see if this is even going to work."

"Don't you need Feron to outfit the other two ships?" Shepard's voice was getting drowsy again and Liara smiled as she answered.

"Yes, but I want to make sure the prototype works like it's supposed to, first, so we don't repeat some error twice more and have to fix them all." Liara's smile faded. "Plus, if we have at least one functional platform out there operating, we can depart at any time if Cerberus acts faster than we expect."

"Hmmm." Shepard was almost asleep. "Good point. But that still doesn't answer who you will trust the Aletheia too."

"Well, obviously, Judea will stay on board, along with whichever two commandos Livos wants with her. So, we just need the info broker." Liara paused as she turned the recent addition to the prospect list over in her head. "What do you think about Miranda Lawson?"

Before Liara could react, Shepard snapped awake and flipped to her back, staring up at the Asari as if she'd gone mad; all thoughts of the massage or sleep gone. "What? I thought you hated her?"

"That's what she wanted to talk to me about earlier. She voiced her objections about continuing to work with Cerberus and the Illusive Man when the Collector war is finished. She asked me for a job within the network." Liara shrugged her shoulders as she took in Shepard's shock. "I know. Hate is a strong word... and that certainly used to be the case. So I surprise myself by even thinking about it, but you trust her. With your life. Goddess knows why, but because of that, I'm willing to give her a chance."

Miranda blushed lightly at Judea's appraisal. "That obvious?"

Judea's laugh was more of just a short 'huh' that made it seem like she didn't laugh much, but it was more because she was very focused on the woman in front of her. "The fact that you're beautiful? Yes. Very. But you're also looking at that glass very seriously, and every once in a while you've looked like you wanted to throw it across the room." Judea canted her head to the side and narrowed her eyes in thought. The warrior Miranda was a woman to be reckoned with; a strong biotic propelled by an even stronger personality, but the contemplative Miranda? That Miranda had a vulnerable aspect that softened her features and made her... very alluring. "The times we've worked together, I've never seen you like this... Disturbed. Pensive. Even when Oriana was in trouble. I have to wonder what could bother you enough to make you so lost in thought."

Miranda was tired. She didn't know if it was just the long mission, the nature of the mission or the whiskey. Most likely some combination of all three, but she respected Judea's abilities and found herself talking to the Asari like a long lost friend. "With Oriana, I knew what I had to do. Now, not so much." Miranda looked up at Judea, "I mean no offense... this is just a hypothetical question, but what would you have done if they had found Matriarch Benezia hadn't been indoctrinated? That she had switched sides and decided to work with Saren voluntarily?"

Judea looked scandalized. "Goddess. What a horrid thought. I... I guess I would ... I don't know. I would have to call into question all my years of service to House T'Soni, wondering how I could have possibly been so blind as to not see she would take the wrong path. Had I known, I would have no honor left to me when she died if I had made no attempt to correct her error...or my lack of judgment. Why would you ask such a thing?"

Miranda closed her eyes as she answered. "Because that is where I find myself. The Illusive Man is not who I thought he was, and before him was my father, who is also concerned only with his own legacy of influence and power. Seems I've made a habit of following the wrong people." She jumped when she felt a warm hand contact hers against her glass.

"You have no choice as to who your father is and as soon as you were old enough, you left him. I know not who this Illusive Man was when you started working for him, but it seems to me that once someone pointed out the error of his current path, you are contemplating a way to fix it. And I doubt very much anyone would say the person you are currently following is a wrong choice. What about that has you so pensive?"

Miranda stared at the warm, almost-violet hand laid on top of hers as she spoke. "I am thinking of the Illusive Man, not Shepard, but I am not contemplating fixing his path, I am contemplating changing mine." Her eyes came up to Judea's, and it suddenly struck Miranda she had never looked into the commando's eyes. They were a striking gold, inlaid on a light morning blue face hinting toward violet. Her face paint was white, in somewhat stark contrast to the blue, but accented by her mostly white commando leathers. All together, it was a captivating combination. Miranda shook her head. Captivating? That has to be the whiskey talking.

Judea spoke conspiratorially, leaning in close to Miranda and lowering her voice to a near whisper. "Change is good, especially when it corrects an error in direction. If you are contemplating shifting loyalty from this Illusive Man to Commander Shepard, I would highly encourage such a transition." She also gently rubbed Miranda's hand with soft and soothing strokes.

Miranda actually laughed. "Oh. That happened a while back, whether I was ready to do so or not. No. Now I'm looking to my future, for when we are done with this mission. Shepard will return to the Alliance, and I cannot follow her there. I have asked Dr T'Soni if I could work for her... in some capacity in her role as Shadow Broker."

Judea's eyes went wide at the prospect of Miranda Lawson joining their team. "Only a select group knows that Liara is actually the Broker." She paused for a moment thinking how she wanted to proceed. "But I feel it may already be too large. There are eleven of us and then the entire Normandy crew. The Cerberus crew." Judea studied Miranda's face for the reaction to her last statement.

Miranda adamantly shook her head. "No, not the entire Normandy crew. Well, let me restate that. Yes, the whole crew knows, but only about the Broker ship. Only the trusted members of the ground team know the future plans for the triad. We are keeping that tight lipped so the Illusive Man won't find out."

Judea sat back and closed her eyes, breathing a sigh of relief. "So, less than two dozen. That is not so bad, when at least twelve will remain a part of the network once the shift is made to the triad and all the others are within Shepard's trusted."

Miranda grimaced, not only at Judea's statement, but at the realization that she missed Judea's warm touch on her hand. "So you have a dozen trusted agents within the commandos, and only need a dozen to crew the ships. That doesn't bode well for my placement within the new organization, does it?"

Judea shrugged. "The Aletheia is a large ship and needs three crew to operate at peak efficiency. I would think it would have maybe six or seven on the main node, instead of only four, with me as pilot and Riana as Liara's First. That creates two slots to fill. Full up it can handle thirteen, but the equipment will take room, though I think they are converting part of the cargo hold for that. Still. I do not believe Liara would want a crew that large. It would take additional supplies at a time when such resources will most likely be scarce. Besides, we are commandos, not information analysts. I would think she could use someone of your intellect."

Miranda smiled. "Good. That sounds a bit more promising then. So, are you definitely piloting the Aletheia?"

"I would think so, but I will go wherever the Lady T'Soni needs me. I am hers to command." At first, Judea seemed willing to accept whatever Liara assigned her, but then she suddenly added a qualifier. "Though, I will admit, if you join the team I would like the opportunity to serve on the same ship..." Judea's face turned a bit more violet than blue in color and she looked down at the table. "...as you."

Miranda suddenly sat forward and stared at the commando. "Wait. What? Why?"

Judea smiled softly. "Perhaps, Ms Lawson, we should continue this discussion in private."

Miranda looked at the commando in a new light, with the realization that the commando was offering more than just comfort to a friend. Her internal debate didn't take long. I did talk about changing paths, and it wouldn't be the first time I've ever been with a woman... though technically she's not a woman. Miranda almost laughed at the oddity of that statement. She's not a woman. She shook her head slightly and smiled as she answered. "Yes, I think perhaps maybe we should."

When Shepard recovered from her astonishment, she smirked. "Well, Miranda certainly has the intellect for the job and I do trust her. She's definitely not TIM's lackey anymore. You could certainly do worse."

Liara reclined next to Shepard and snuggled into the commander's shoulder. "Good. Then it's settled. When you return through the relay, Feron, Arlyna and Miranda will take over the network. We can convert Miranda's office to a fourth node that Riana and I can operate from, to stay connected to the information flow. I'll speak to Feron about getting the additional set of equipment."

Shepard frowned. "It's not settled yet. We still have other considerations... like me having to turn myself, and the Normandy, in to the Alliance."

Liara thumped her lover gently on the stomach. "That is not a given, Commander. We'll talk about that when you get back. Because the new Normandy is not their ship, nor is it staffed by Alliance crew, other than Karin."

"And Gabby and Ken and Joker..." Shepard raised her eyebrows at Liara's forcefulness.

"Who have all left the Alliance. If anything, they are probably considered traitors, much like you would be if not for your Spectre status." Liara wasn't giving an inch and, unfortunately, her arguments had a lot of merit.

Shepard sighed tiredly, her heart not really into debating the Asari intellect. Shepard knew she would lose, eventually. "It will be a Council ship if I confiscate it under my Spectre status... and I'll use my Spectre status to grant them immunity."

She was surprised when Liara kissed her gently on the cheek. "That might actually work. As long as they don't charge you with terrorism for Bahak and revoke your status."

"Huh. Yeah. There is that. And now I suppose you expect me to sleep with that hanging over my head?" Shepard chuckled, though there wasn't really a lot of humor in the sound. Liara could tell it was forced.

"Just focus on the Collectors, Shepard. Come back from that safe and we'll figure the rest out later. But know that one way or another, I will be with you. If I have to get an apartment in London and all we do is talk through our link, you will not be without me." Liara kissed her again, but this time a blue hand pulled the commander's chin over to place the kiss on welcoming lips. That same hand caressed Samantha's cheek as the Asari whispered soothingly, "Sleep, Love. We'll talk again when you wake."

Once the commander was in a deep sleep, which actually didn't take very long once they quit talking, Liara got up and slipped out to speak with Feron, Livos and Miranda. Feron and Livos were easy to find and plans were soon in motion. Miranda, however, was nowhere to be found. So, before returning to her room, Liara sent her a message that she would like to speak with her again, at the operative's convenience, sometime before the Normandy departed Hagalaz.

When they stepped into Judea's room, Miranda was pleasantly surprised. She expected there to be either two or four commandos to a room, but Judea had private quarters. Judea explained since she was Liara's personal pilot, she had her own quarters, as did Riana, because they had to be available at any hour, day or night, on a moment's notice and did not want to disturb any other commando's rest cycle in the event of an off-hour call. The commando offered her a seat on the couch before getting two bottles of water, handing one to Miranda. "I assume we want to stay sober for this conversation?"

Miranda laughed and nodded. "Yes, I think that's probably best."

"So, Ms Lawson. I would think with your acceptance to speak in private, I can safely assume you did not take offense at my forwardness." Judea sat quietly and took a sip of her water. "Either that or you are extremely courteous and chose not to embarrass me in public with an open refusal."

Miranda placed her water on a side table and folded her hands nervously in her lap. "No offense, certainly. Though I am somewhat surprised." At the look on Judea's face, she felt the need to elaborate. "Not at your interest, but at my own. Please don't take that the wrong way, but given my background and who I have worked with for the majority of my life, I am surprised that I can even entertain the thought of a non-human being attractive to me, in that way." Miranda flinched at her own words. "God, that sounds dreadful."

Judea actually laughed. "On the contrary, Ms Lawson. To me, it indicates two things. First, I believe you are confessing that you actually do find me attractive, which is a good start. Second, it is just more evidence that you do not belong in an organization such as Cerberus."

"Well, yes, I suppose it does. But I don't believe 'attractive' is the right word." Miranda smiled at the expression on Judea's face. "I believe the word that flitted through my brain was captivating."

As Judea's face turned a dark purple, Miranda laughed. "For being such a competent commando, you seem to blush easily... and you seem young, but I can't judge Asari ages worth a damn. I hope I haven't just offended you. But, I'll go first, so you don't feel so bad. First off, please call me Miranda. Ms Lawson makes me feel old, and I'm only thirty-six. Or at least I will be, in a few months, in May, on the Earth calendar... and I suppose all those details are completely irrelevant. Sorry. I have a tendency to do that. Be much too specific, that is. I do it to poor Shepard all the time."

Judea shook her head in bewilderment. "The differences in our cultures are so vast. At thirty-six, I was still in primary school. We don't even normally go to University until fifty-five or sixty and I didn't become a commando until I was eighty-seven. Now, I'm two hundred ninety three and still a maiden. If I had stayed as an active commando instead of going to pilot training, I'd be a squad leader, eligible for captain in another fifty years or so. But I didn't, so I'm not. And I absolutely love flying, so I have no regrets."

Miranda frowned. "I wish I could say the same, about no regrets." She looked up and caught Judea's eyes again and her frown disappeared. "But I'm going to change all that and not add any more to the list." She reached out tentatively and took Judea's hand. "And I'd like to start by saying yes to you."

"I am glad... Miranda." Judea blushed again, but only lightly this time. "Would you be willing to... meld... with me?"

Miranda's eyes flew wide. "Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't think... Ahh." She shook her head. "I'd like to do this right, and kind of take things... slower?" She squirmed a bit on the couch and stared down at their joined hands, hoping she didn't just insult the Asari... again.

Judea rolled her eyes. "I didn't mean THAT kind of meld. I mean like a simple knowledge meld, as in a 'between friends' kind of meld. Just to share feelings and maybe some history." Judea laughed at Miranda's embarrassment. "What is it about Humans that makes you think all we want to do is jump into bed with you?"

"Oh God. I'm sorry. I didn't think. Of course I know there are different kinds of melds! Otherwise, Shepard and Dr... " Miranda turned a rather deep shade of pink and just stopped talking. She tried to pull back her hand, but Judea wouldn't let go of it.

Now Judea really laughed. "Well, they do have a lot of sex, but I think I would too if I saw my promised that infrequently... and had two years to make up for. But that's beside the point." It was Judea's turn to shake her head. "And for being so forceful and adventuresome, you Human's are amazingly uptight about your sexuality and what you consider appropriate."

Miranda smiled and relaxed, "Just with people we don't know well. So... I guess we need to get to know one another." Miranda took a deep breath and blew it out quickly. "Obviously, I've never melded before, so... just... talk me through."

After a few false starts and roadblocks, Judea was finally able to establish a connection and showed Miranda the coastal city of Dassus, where she grew up. It was an early maritime trade center that progressed from building sailboats to building the first Asari interstellar vessel, the Maiden Voyage. As such, space travel was a huge industry and a large number of the residents in more recent times either built ships or flew them; many did both. Judea had known since the age of twenty that she was going to be a pilot. Miranda had more difficulty opening up, but finally managed to show Judea the Lawson private estate outside of Canberra, Australia, on the shores of Lake Bathurst. Judea was amazed at the torrent of emotions that flowed with the images Miranda showed her. The resentment, pain and loneliness were a sharp contrast to the beauty and serenity of the setting. There were tears in the Asari's eyes when she dropped the meld. Miranda scowled. "I'll not have your pity, Judea."

"I do not pity you, Miranda. I am amazed by you. That you developed the strength and tenacity to overcome such odds to mature into who you have become. But it still makes me sad that anyone would be subjected to such a childhood. No child should have to endure the pain of being told by a parent they are a disappointment. It is just cruel. The Asari are no different. We are not exempt from, nor immune to, such negative emotions." The pilot shook her head. "But, it made you who you are and put you here with me today, so I will not pity you nor wish it had been any different for you, or we may not have met. And for that, I am glad."

"Sorry. I also have a tendency to be a bit defensive. I have a hard time... trusting. But working with Shepard, I'm beginning to realize there are some people out there who are worthy of it." Miranda smiled. "Thank you, for that. The experience was both amazing and enlightening. I am beginning to understand why Shepard and Liara work so well together. It's almost as if you are the other person for a while. I imagine you do that often enough, you get a pretty good idea how your partner will react to just about anything."

Judea agreed. "Yes. Asari partners certainly develop closer relationships than most other species are capable of, but the relationship between Liara and the commander is unusually strong." Judea squeezed Miranda's hand. "Full partners rarely have any secrets from one another, especially once they have experienced a full union. I am glad to already know your history. I would think it is the hardest thing for you to share. Thank you."

Miranda smiled. "Generally, yes, but you knew some of it already, because of Oriana, so it wasn't actually as difficult as I thought it would be. Because of that mission, I respect your abilities and your discretion. It goes a long way towards my ability to trust you."

Miranda's omnitool blinked with the incoming message from Liara. "Well. It's Dr T'Soni. She wants to see me before the Normandy departs. She doesn't waste any time, does she?"

"No. She is generally very decisive. I guess you should go, then." Judea grinned. "After you depart Hagalaz, talk to the commander on how best to get in touch with me."

As Miranda typed a quick message back to Liara that she would meet her in Central Operations, she tipped her head in question to Judea. "Shepard? It makes me very curious as to why you would say that. Why should I speak to her?"

Judea's eyes lit up. "Well, I'm sure you're not ready for the Illusive Man to know you're dating one of Dr T'Soni's commandos... and I'd lay odds that the commander has a direct secure line to the Broker." Judea said nothing about the STG burst transmitter. She would leave that to Shepard to reveal, if she decided to.

"Ah. Good point." They stood together and Judea walked her to the door. "Thank you, Judea. My ruminations over what my future may hold turned out better than I ever imagined." Miranda cast an open smile at the Asari before her.

"Believe me, Miranda. The pleasure was mine. I have been admiring you at a distance since we met, after working with you the first time when we recruited Justicar Samara. I never thought this opportunity would arise, so I tried to ignore my desire. When you mentioned asking Lady T'Soni for a job... well. Let's just say I didn't see the point of forcing myself to stay away anymore."

"I'm glad." As Miranda turned to leave, she stopped and grabbed Judea's hand. "Come with me to Central Operations, so you can hear the news as well. You might as well know up front how difficult this may be."

Judea smiled. "I'd hope to find out how easy it's going to be."

Miranda entered Central Operations and immediately went to Dr T'Soni's desk. While Liara appreciated the cool professionalism with which the operative received the news, she still saw the excitement and relief dancing in Lawson's eyes. As before, Liara watched the operative walk away but was curious when instead of leaving, Miranda went directly to Judea Voni. That, in and of itself, was nothing terribly irregular, but the quick clasp of Judea's hands onto Lawson's upper arms followed by a quick kiss to the cheek certainly got Liara's attention. She entertained a light smile as she turned away to return to her room and to Shepard. Well, Miranda Lawson. There may be hope for you yet.

Shepard seemed sound asleep when Liara returned, so the Asari quickly disrobed and slid in next to her lover. Ever vigilant, Shepard clamped down on the wrist of the arm that was encircling her and spun on her attacker, only to see a pair of shocked blue eyes staring at her, accompanied by a startled exclamation. "Samantha! It's just me!"

Shepard frowned and narrowed her eyes, breathing rapidly with a rush of adrenalin coursing through her. Recognizing the voice, she stopped and blinked a couple of times, fully waking before she spoke. "Gods, Liara... I'm sorry!" She changed her grip on Liara's arm and pulled it toward her, looking to see if she had left any marks on her wrist. Seeing nothing, she gently kissed the inside of the Asari's wrist in apology. "Damn it. I hope that doesn't bruise later. Sorry, Blue. I was...dreaming."

Liara's brow furrowed in concern. "Nightmares, Shepard?"

Shepard flopped flat and closed her eyes as she swallowed. "Yeah. Aratoht."

Liara sighed sadly. "With you, I guess that's to be expected. First it's the beacon, then getting spaced, and now this." She cuddled into Shepard's shoulder. "I wish there was something I could do to help."

Shepard pressed an affectionate kiss on the top of Liara's crest. "I don't typically have them when we're together. It's unusual."

Liara groaned, "My fault. I snuck out to talk to Feron, Livos and Miranda. I was just coming back to bed."

Shepard gave her a squeeze and laughed lightly. "Me having nightmares is not your fault. Don't be silly. You just might want to peek in through the link first next time, to make sure it's safe."

Liara was aghast. "Shepard! Never would I do so without your permission first! That is a grave taboo in our society, to meld without explicit consent..."

Shepard cut her off with a soft chuckle. "Blue, you're in my head every minute we're in the same system because of the link anyway, but if you need explicit consent, I give it to you. Here and now. You never need to ask. I have no secrets from you."

Liara was dead silent for a few moments as she sat up and stared at Shepard in shocked astonishment. "Just because the link exists does not mean I am actively looking and perusing your every thought. Do you truly have any idea what you are offering me, Shepard? How precious a gift that is in Asari society?"

Samantha smiled up at her. "Liara. Siame. We are one. We share Inanna. You are my heart and soul. I know you would never abuse the privilege, so I trust you." Her smile faded. "Especially if it involves your safety. I would never forgive myself if I hurt you; having a nightmare is no excuse. If you consider it a gift, then accept this gift from me. Please."

Tears streamed from Liara's eyes as she mumbled, "Oh, Shepard!" and leaned forward and kissed Samantha lovingly on the lips. She sniffed and snuggled back in tightly to her favorite little shoulder nook, hugging Sam close to her. "I love you, Siame. Unto Eternity."