I almost made this into two chapters, but figured it was just easier making it into one that flicked between their two perspectives. I'm hoping that after this one, and probably the next Charley/Kalis chapter, you will have a better idea of what's going on.
Chapter 25. Reality check
"Can you confirm, package received?"
"Received, as requested. Destination?"
"Outpost 738. Recipient on label."
"Gotcha. Nice doing business with you General."
"Likewise. See you in a year?"
"Ha. You should be so lucky. Captain Metis over and out."
They guards came, as normal, early in the morning. Plutark's dawn was probably the only redeeming visual quality about this planet, and for some reason this morning the woman had woken in time to appreciate it.
The rising star had not yet breached the horizon, but the polluted atmosphere was awash with an eerie purple glow that faded into a deep crimson as the planet turned, eventually lightening to the soft pastel orange that had become the norm during daylight. Charley almost never saw these hours now, the ones between sunrise and sunset, but she was treated this one single morning to the reverent beauty that was the early celestial glow.
For a few seconds she had stared through the tiny barred window of her cell and bathed in this cool, weak light, enjoying it in silence so as not to wake her slumbering neighbour. She knew he would want to speak to her, desperately, but he looked so peaceful and calm when he slept, so untroubled by their separate, parallel fates that his features softened even through the ugly, rubber mask he wore.
Charley smiled. The Plutarkian on the bunk by the bars between them was sucking his thumb, which whilst odd, verging on cute (if a Plutarkian could ever be thought of as such), was a simple testimony to just how much that grown male needed comfort.
Something she was not able to provide him with right now.
A distant banging of a door alerted her to the hour. They were coming for her yet again, coming to take her to that white-washed basement laboratory with its resident, mute alien and its mysterious experiments.
There was nothing she could do about it, so she waited in silence and let herself be taken without objection. It didn't frighten her anymore, anyway, and besides... she had work to do.
A mission to keep her mind focused on something. Without it she suspected she would have gone insane months ago.
Months... I wonder how many now. It might even be years.
Limburger had been keeping track, not her, and it had been a while since she had asked him. It had been a while since she had been able to ask him.
The journey to the lab was uneventful. The guards took her as far as the cold, metal table, strapping her down for the alien to work on. Then they left, as they always did, though she knew at some point they would return to move her to the other chamber, and onwards into that other mind. The other mind somewhere out there... her only window to the wider world. Her only hope of freedom.
This morning Charley lay down on that table and waited eagerly to be put under, or whatever it was the alien did to her. She still had not figured out what the machine did with all those arms, other than they were probably some sort of stimulating probes. Very sci-fi, she thought, once again wondering if those people claiming to have been abducted by aliens weren't so crazy after all.
The goggle-like attachment was the only part of the whole set-up she could make any sensible guesses about. Aside from acting as a very effective blindfold, in that tiny moment before it closed off her eyes from the bright light of the lab she was able to make out something flickering inside it.
Again, a picture from another sci-fi scenario crossed her mind. And a flashback to an encounter with one of her ex-boyfriends. Jack McCyber. Him and his virtual reality helmet.
Perhaps Kalis isn't actually real and this is all some kind of... simulation... like a test situation they are putting me though.
It was a sobering thought. For all she knew the Plutarkians sitting there behind their view screens, watching her attempts to talk to her alter ego, were finding it highly amusing that the stupid Earth woman really believed this was all real.
Either that or I really am crazy. Or dead. Or in a coma. Dreaming.
The possibilities were endless, and she tried hard not to think about all the other equally likely scenarios to her reality because it only served to make her feel more hopeless. And she really needed hope. There had to be someone, something, anything out there that might provide a way out of this.
She had to believe that or else she might as well just not bother trying, and give up. A tiny voice inside her was the only thing telling her she mustn't.
Because of them.
What, if anything, had happened to her furry friends in her absence was deep down the only thing that really mattered to her. Yes, she cared about what was happening to Limburger, how could she not now she had grown so close to him? Yes, she cared about the wider issues beyond her own discomforts, such as the state of her current host planet and the circumstances surrounding the rebel forces. But these were new concerns, surface cares, and nothing compared to the almost instinctual, maternal bond she had with her alien friends back home.
Are they even out there? Are they even looking?
She knew that if they were, they would not give up on her. Their basal beliefs in honour would not allow them to rest until there was nothing left for them to do.
In the meantime, she herself had something to do. She had to concentrate. She had to find out what they were doing to her, if only to confirm her hopes that this was not a simulation, dream, nor state of insanity. That it was very real, that her alter was real and out there, and in danger from the intrusions into her mind. And that this person could help her.
Asking the mute alien what was going on was pointless. She had tried many times, and the only response was it continuing on as if she hadn't made a sound. Then that thing would be shoved into her mouth, the last preparation before the machine was activated, and her protests and questions were stifled once more.
Today was no different, and she slipped into that altered state of consciousness completely unaware of the progression of the following procedures.
It was with some relief that she 'woke up' inside that mouse general's mind. Her fear was that the Plutarkians would figure out what she was doing and find a way to stop it. Or that perhaps she would just never remember it, and flail helplessly around in her cell between sessions, not knowing whether or not she had done something useful or destructive with her out of body trips to that other place.
Thank goodness she's not asleep this time.
"Kalis, it's me, Charley – i'm back." Her voice was so loud inside the mouse's head this time it made her jump, and the human was aware of her other body's heart beating frantically at the sudden surprise.
"Jeez woman, you nearly gave me a heart attack!"
Mental note, don't scare the living wits out of my host next time. She's no good to me dead. Charley couldn't help chuckling to herself as the mouse recovered her composure.
"Oi! I heard that... honestly..." Kalis wasn't all that impressed at her mind's intruder laughing at her expense, but she quickly softened. "I suppose you've come to ask me to help you again, haven't you?"
"Well it's not like I get a choice about being here... but seeing as I am... uh... yeah."
Kalis sighed. She really did want to help this woman; after everything that had happened, after all the people who she may as well have sentenced to death... helping this unknown person was something she dearly wished she was in a position to do. But she wasn't.
"You know I can't even leave my quarters, or say anything to you that might be used against this base. I really don't know what I can do."
"What about your commander? Err... Frost? Can't you ask him do try something?"
Charley got the impression that the rat who frequented the general's bed would be quite happy to do anything he could to help the mouse. But getting her to ask him in the first place was a pretty big hurdle.
"It would really help if you could find out what's going on your end first you know. Have you not got any more of an idea how they are doing this? I mean... why is obvious... but how? That's what we really want to know"
"I've told you everything I saw" the human woman huffed, feeling just as frustrated as the body she was in did, "but seeing as I don't even know for sure if this is real and not some sort of drug-induced hallucination..."
"Do they drug you? Definitely?"
"Well I guess so... there's a lot of sharp pointy things on that machine and I always feel like crap when I finally wake up..."
And so tired. I always feel so tired.
"Listen you need to figure out what is going on at your end. Can't you get them to tell you somehow, you know, turn on your feminine charms or something and see if they open up?"
The Martian general had tried this a few times herself, and it did have some success. Sometimes.
"Believe me I have thought of that, and tried it, but it never gets me anywhere. Either they don't speak or they talk in Plutarkian or something."
The general frowned. "I'm guessing you don't know the lingo there huh? Can you remember any of the words? I know a little myself... I should do, been doing this job a long time now."
"I'm sorry, i've no idea." It was really exasperating. Charley dearly wished she had paid much more attention that day she had seen those two Plutarkians in that viewing room.
In her mind Kalis could sense the despair in the other woman's heart. In fact she could practically feel it herself, on top of her own feelings of uselessness and guilt. "Charley... don't give up. I promise if there is anything I can do I will try. I..." Do I tell her..? It might only get her hopes up...
"Please... i'm begging you. It's not just for me... It's... i'm not here on my own."
This was news to the Martian mouse. "You're not? Who else?" Hope she's not expecting some kind of mass jail break, there's no way I could organise that, not even if I was free to go there in person.
A little reluctantly Charley gave her host a brief explanation about Limburger. She was expecting the general to be appalled, disgusted even that she had gotten so close to someone so vile and unfeeling. But it must have been the way that she spoke, the words that she used to describe the plight of her Plutarkian neighbour, because Kalis did not react negatively at all.
"Hmm. Well you know not all fish are bad. Even the bad ones can be good sometimes. You've seen the ones that work here, right?"
"Yeah. I have. Though I admit I was a little surprised." It was true. Charley had at first assumed the base was under Plutarkian control. "So you'll help him too? Limburger I mean. I couldn't just leave him here, not after everything we've been through, that he's been through."
"Like I said before Charley, if there is anything I can do. If." Kalis decided against letting on to the Earth woman that she had already done everything she was capable of. There was no way of her knowing if it would help, and even if it did it could be months before anything happened. No, there was no point in getting her hopes up just yet. "Just do what you can on your end, you never know you might get an opportunity of your own long before I do."
Charley sighed. The mouse was right. Kalis was already in a difficult position without adding this to her burdens. "I'll try. Thanks, anyway."
There was little else she could say or do to change the general's mind, and right now she really wanted to be alone, back in her cell, and getting some sleep. She could feel her eyes itching, and rubbed them, yawning loudly.
"Uh... Charley? You ok?" Kalis could sense the weariness in the other woman.
"Huh... yeah sorry, despite spending most of my life asleep nowadays I don't feel like i'm getting any rest."
I know how that feels. Kalis continued rubbing her eyes, sympathising with the strong urge to want to get some serious shut-eye. She circled her room for a while, before heading towards the little doorway at the back that led into a small bathroom.
It was only when she had unbuttoned her trousers that it struck her. Wait a minute... I don't need to go, I only just went...
"Charley... by any chance did you... um... or not..?"
Kalis shook her head and pulled her clothing together again. The woman in her mind had gone very quiet all of a sudden, but it was incredibly unnerving that for a moment, just for a moment... she had lost control of her own body.
"Charley..? You there?"
But the human voice was absent, and Kalis sensed she was alone once more.
I knew I should have gone before they took me.
That urgent ache in her belly was all-consuming, and for a moment she could think of little else – other than the desire to sleep, that is. She had seen the small bathroom briefly once before, and whilst wondering if relieving her host's body would take the pressure off her own, she suddenly realised Kalis was already heading towards the door.
Oh my. Did I just do that?
A tiny part of her had noticed the almost synchronised yawn and eye rub she and the general had performed, but dismissed it as merely coincidence. But seeing those grey-furred hands working at the belt and buttons rammed it home.
I'm in control. Uh oh.
At that same second, the same point at which the realisation dawned in her that she had finally, somehow, moved her host by the will of her own mind, at that same time the connection was severed and she felt herself falling.
Falling to her knees inside the strange, transporter-shaped chamber, her body slumping in exhaustion, her head reeling and spinning from being pulled back to reality.
She felt sick, and weak, and her skin tingled intensely. The sensation was almost like an electric charge running through her surface layers, the tiny hairs on her body stood erect, and her heart and breaths quickened with the current.
And then it was gone, that feeling, and she was left as a shell lacking in any energy.
What the heck?
Suddenly there was an eruption of noise. Shouts, footsteps, doors, alarms, everything. The glass door of the chamber opened with a hissing swoosh, the equilibrium between the air inside and out returning, and green-scaled hands were reaching in and dragging her to her feet.
There was a lot of urgent chatter between the guards, much of which sounded like accusations and commands, and excuses. From their reaction is was apparent that the woman was not meant to have awoken. Not here, not now.
Charley tried her very best to make sense of it, of why they were so panicked, and of why she was conscious when she normally wouldn't be. She tried to catch at least one word she could hold onto and relay back to her alter body. Something to indicate to them both just what the hell was going on. It wasn't easy. Her mind was foggy, her body still drugged, and everything around her was happening so fast. She hadn't even realised the guards were frantically ripping off that military uniform and pulling her into her normal clothes.
They carried her out of the chamber and through that adjoining room with the screens. The one holding her paused to talk hurriedly to another guard, and for a few seconds her eyes fell on the monitors on the wall.
As far as she could tell, from what was on screen, they had not seen the mouse going into the bunk-room's en-suite. In fact, the video looked like it was on pause, and had frozen on a picture of the control room that Charley had seen many times before. But not today. Not for a while.
Is that a recording of an earlier visit? Where's the one of today?
The guard started walking, and something inside her ignited. All the drugs in the world would not stop her now.
Charley launched herself from the arms she was cradled in, and dived towards the panels below the view screens. Everything she knew about electronics, mechanics, alien technology – all of it in its entirety came flooding back to her for those few seconds that she had, and she frantically pressed buttons on the computer before they could pull her away again.
Kicking and screaming she was yanked backwards, but she fought them so ferociously it bought her enough time to take a mental photograph of what she was seeing.
She had managed to press the equivalent of the play button, but not just for the tape that had just been paused, but for a number of other recordings of her forays into the general's mind.
Charley wasn't stupid. She may not have been able to speak or read Plutarkian, but it didn't take a genius to recognise the recordings were in date order. She had just opened the files on the three most recent entries to the database, and not a single one indicated that Charley was communicating with the mouse. In fact, from what she could remember of her visits, at moments that would have given it all away there was just static, the picture resuming only when Charley had felt the connection weaken.
They haven't been able to get anything for weeks now.
Eventually the guards got control of her, and she was hauled back to her cell. She too hoped they would leave her alone with Limburger so that she could tell him what had happened, but when she saw them cuffing the fear-filled fish and leading him away, she knew that her efforts had been in vain.
Help would not come in time to save him from suffering a second round of brooding.
Charley paced her own cell for the next few hours, apparently either having shaken off the sedatives or else had filled with enough adrenalin to cancel out their effects. She couldn't help the guilt building inside her heart, but equally there was excitement lurking in there too.
I got control. Maybe I can force Kalis to help me.
Desperation was driving her to want to do the unthinkable. To sacrifice the safety of the rebel base for her own gains. It was very wrong, she knew, but she was a smart woman and felt confident that she could do it with minimal damage to her host.
In fact she was more confident now than ever. The longer she thought about what she had seen on those screens, the more she wanted to try it. For if she had guessed correctly, the greater the control she had over the connection between the general and her own body, the less the Plutarkians had over what information was getting through. The clearer it was for her... the opposite was true for them.
Or so she hoped. Because if she was wrong, then the next time she entered that mouse general's mind could be her last.
Well that was weird. And scary.
Her military instincts were poking at her hard, and the only thing Kalis could think of to do right now was confide in the only person who might vaguely understand.
"Frost, can I see you in my quarters?"
The soft, masculine voice of the rat replied to her through her hand-held radio, and a minute later he appeared in her doorway.
"You alright Kalis?" He didn't need to ask to know something had happened, but it was a courtesy he usually extended rather than just open his arms and drag her straight into an embrace. With the way her moods were sometimes, that would be an almost suicidal way to greet the general, girlfriend or not.
"I... I don't know. Something happened... something weird..."
She was giving him an odd look, one that said she was torn between opening up to him, and closing herself down so completely that no one would see just how frightened she was.
He could read the distress and the indecision on her face, and stepped further into the room, closing the door behind him. "It's alright, you can tell me - whatever it is."
Next second she was in his arms, grasping onto him tightly, her face buried into his chest and into the fur showing between the edges of his jacket. "I just feel so helpless..." She began, before dissolving into tears.
"Shhh... Shhh now I know it's hard. Tell me what's going on, has it got something to do with your dreams... with that woman?"
Frost cuddled the crying mouse and waited patiently for her to speak. Eventually she did, and between choking breaths she described everything that had just happened whilst the human woman had been in her mind.
The rat frowned, and sat himself and the mouse down on the edge of the bed. Having the human seeing what Kalis could was dangerous enough, especially if there were Plutarkians observing their interactions, but her actually having control over her host... conscious control quite possibly...
Then again, he thought, since the human had opened up a dialogue their operations had been running much smoother. It might have just been because Kalis was spending nearly all her time in her quarters, but if there was technology out there sophisticated enough to get one mind inside another, minds of two people who have never met and who were probably miles and miles away from each other... then what's to stop them just delving into Kalis's memories and using that as all the intel they would ever need?
"Kalis... I know you feel helpless right now, and I know you hate being stuck here in your room all day but..." He took a deep breath, not wanting to upset the woman any more than she was. "But you need to try and stop that human getting into your mind. It's dangerous. She could be trying to gain your confidence and lure you into saying something you shouldn't. You have to put a stop to this, and fast."
Frost pushed her away from his chest but held her firmly and at arm's length. He stared into her emerald eyes, sternly, hoping to get across the severity of the situation.
"You're a Martian mouse. You're trained to stop intrusions in your mind. For some reason they got by your natural defences, but now you know you have to do it again. Build another barrier. Keep those rotten spies from getting too far in... before it's too late."
Kalis lowered her eyes. "It may already be too late."
"Then you need to do it before any more damage is done. You understand, don't you? It's your duty to protect the people under your command. You have to do this."
The mouse swallowed, clearly miserable. She could understand, agree even, with what the rat was saying to her, but the desperation and fear and hopelessness she had sensed when she had spoken to Charley – she knew those emotions were not her own. And that they were genuine. Or at least that's how they felt.
"What if she's not working for them, not of her own free will? If I cut her off she might never find a way out of that stink-fish hell hole."
"Look, blocking her from your mind now will do more good than harm. Trust me. And if she really is in trouble, when things settle down we can send out some scouts next time we have a mission scheduled on the surface."
Kalis knew the rat was just trying to convince her, and console her, but it didn't make it any easier. "By then it might be too late... "
Frost hugged her again, knowing that this whole situation was less than ideal. "I know. But what else can we do? We're at war, and until that's over life's not going to get any easier. The choices we have to make aren't going to get any easier."
The general nodded, wishing there as another way. "You're right. I'm sorry, i'm so sorry."
"Hey, it's ok, I understand. But the sooner you do this, the sooner you can get back to active duty, and doing some real work for a change. And maybe, just maybe, we can figure out how to save that human woman."
She allowed herself a small smile. He always knew what to do. That's why she loved him. That's why he was her second in command.
Kalis decided she would spend the next few hours re-learning the ancient skill of closing her mind, something she had not had to do for a long, long time. Usually once the barriers were in place, controlling what information passed between antennal connections was second nature, and needed no further conscious effort. As the breach to her mind must have been fairly skilfully done, and powerful, it was going to take a huge amount of concentration to close it again.
"I'm going to need some time alone, Frost. No disturbances. See to that, would you?"
"Yes Sir." He grinned, kissing her on the nose. "I'll be back to check on you... in the morning?"
"That's great. I should be all done by then." Kalis winked. "And then you better be on your best behaviour, because the General's going to be back on duty for real."
A flutter of excitement went through her. Having her life go back to normal was what she wanted more than anything right now, and making the decision to block out the intrusions into her mind suddenly felt like the right thing to do.
For everyone's sakes, she hoped it was.