Five Years Later
Chapter 25
The week went by so fast. Mike would take the kids to school, Grace would spend the day with Ryan at Maggie's restaurant and Mike would either go back to the farm or to the sheriff's office to help Alec with the investigation. It had turned into a massive undertaking because as they worked their way backwards, they were discovering dozens of cases that could be tracked back to Sarah and Daniel. Alec had experience investigating homicides but not as much as Mike and the sheer amount of information that needed to be sorted through was shocking. And with the pandemic; they hadn't gotten all the records either.
On Friday, Mike took Grace for her follow up appointments with the brain surgeon and general surgeon. He offered to take Ryan along but Ryan was wearing out almost as easily as Grace and so he decided to stay with his mom. If the appointment ran late, she would pick up Hannah and Matty for Mike. They still planned on having Max out to stay Friday night. Matty's birthday was Saturday and so they switched the dinner with Polly to Saturday night because Matty wanted Pastor Polly there for his party. Maggie, Alec and Ryan would also be there along with Polly's baby girl, Gabby.
Grace's appointments went as well as Mike expected they would. All the stitches were removed and the doctors were happy with how Grace was healing. They confirmed that the exhaustion was normal and suggested she not go back to work immediately or work half days. The headaches were normal and might be a lifelong issue; which made Mike's heart hurt. She also had an appointment with a gynecologist which Mike obviously didn't sit through. It was the one that had made him the most nervous because they would be testing for STD's and pregnancy and it was the one that he couldn't offer her any help with. Just support.
He waited in the waiting room and outside lobby; pacing back and forth. Maggie had offered to go with Grace for that particular appointment if it was made on a different day but Grace wanted to get it over with. She would have to be retested to make sure she hadn't caught anything nasty in three months but they were all more nervous about the pregnancy issue. Grace hadn't talked much about what she would do if she had gotten pregnant due to the rape. It would be an excruciating decision for her. Mike would support whatever Grace decided to do if she was pregnant and he knew that Ryan had told her the same thing. The thought just terrified him.
Mike had gone out to the outer lobby and texted Grace what his location was. While he was waiting on her; he decided to call Tom. It was in the middle of a workday but he felt the need to talk to someone.
"Hey, I'm on my lunch hour. What's up?"
"Just waiting on Grace. She is at the ob-gyn's. She's been cleared medically where the surgeries are concerned. May always have headaches but otherwise will be okay. They're checking her to see if she is recovering from the trauma of the rape, if she has any STD's or is pregnant."
"Oh geez. Poor girl. Poor dad."
"Yeah. It's rough. I can't help her with this one. Other appointments I stayed with her but not this one. I hate that if they tell her that she is pregnant or has some sort of disease, she's in there alone. The nurse told me that they would come get me, but it's Grace. She will probably try and handle it on her own."
"Has she got a plan in place if she's pregnant?"
"Not that she's told me. I suspect she and Ryan have spoken about it more so. He told me that he would support whatever decision she made. Just a rough decision. I'm more scared of the pregnancy issue than the disease issue. Daniel told Alec he didn't have anything nasty."
"But the idiot obviously didn't use a condom?"
"Nope, course not."
"She remembered much else?"
"No. I think she has remembered all that she is going to. I just hope she doesn't have to testify but she's tough. She'll get through it. She did mention moving back to her apartment this week. Wants me to patch up the dry wall where he slammed her head into the wall first. It bugs her to see it."
"Well, yeah. Medically speaking, is she ready?"
"Yeah but psychologically speaking is another story. I've left for short periods of time but she hasn't been truly alone for a long stretch of time yet. I have a feeling her first night at the apartment will be rough. Ryan, Alec and I will be getting a lot of phone calls."
"Give her my number. She may hesitate to call you guys but not me. If I sense that it's a true emergency I will call you but it may give her another source to talk to."
"I appreciate that and I know that she will too. She may be afraid to call if she thinks we'll think she is freaking out."
"Yeah, so when is the move going to happen? Now that she's medically cleared, it may be sooner than her old dad would like."
"Well, Matty's birthday is tomorrow and Lucas' would have been Monday. She promised me that she wouldn't move out until after Monday. I plan on fixing the dry wall Monday. Need to stay busy."
"Gonna be rough. You've not stopped to think about his birthday or even the day that he died. Now you have to."
"Yeah, I'm dreading it. It's wrong but I am thinking about keeping Matty out of school that day. Having him around is comforting."
"Mike, Matty is not Lucas. I understand what you're thinking and it's understandable. But it isn't fair to that little boy. You need to work through this stuff concerning Lucas. Lucas deserves that. Matty deserves that. And you know that."
"Yeah, I know. Just dreading the day. Matty would be a welcome distraction."
"But you don't need the distraction. You need the reality. And stay away from the liquor aisle."
"Yeah. Not even crossed my mind."
"It might that day. Grace is going to need you at the top of your game; especially if her appointment doesn't go well but even if it does, moving back to the apartment where she was brutally attacked will be tough."
"Yeah, I know. Speaking of which, she just walked into the waiting room. I better get going. Thanks for the talk."
"Call me if you need me and let me know the results of the appointment."
"Will do."
Grace had stopped to make an appointment and Mike waited outside the doors for her. He couldn't get a read on her body language which made him nervous. He could tell that she was completely exhausted. It made his heart hurt for her. She turned back around and he grabbed the glass door for her. There were people around and so she still wasn't talking. But once they got into the elevator alone, she broke. Mike grabbed her in a bear hug and let her cry.
"Oh, honey. It'll be okay. You have so many people that love you. We'll help you but you gotta tell me what the doctor said."
They had hit the ground floor and the elevator doors opened and of course there were people all around. Grace pulled away and headed towards the bathroom to wash her face. Mike got her a bottle of water out of the vending machine and waited. It was making him really miss Christine. He obviously couldn't follow her into the bathroom and she really needed a woman to talk to. He heard the door open back up and was glad to see she was no longer crying.
"Can we please go out to the Explorer; Daddy? I don't want to talk with all these people around and I want to go home."
"Absolutely. Let's get out of here."
He opened the bottle for her and she drank a huge gulp of water as they walked. He opened the car door for her and helped her with the seat belt since she couldn't twist around to get it. He couldn't get a read from her and it was really worrying him. After he got his door shut he looked over at her and saw the tears rolling down her cheeks.
"Baby, you gotta talk."
"I'm not pregnant. Don't have a disease either. But the doctor says there was a lot of trauma and scar tissue. She isn't sure that I will be able to ever get pregnant. She's not sure. She wants to recheck again in three months and then again in six months. Just not sure that Ryan will be okay with it. He wants a house full of kids. How is he going to be okay with this? It's just not fair."
"No, it's not. I don't have any easy answer. The only thing I can say is hold off on giving up hope. The body is remarkable. It can heal itself. That maybe why the doc wants to wait and recheck you. As far as Ryan is concerned, he loves you. There are other options in place. Adoption? It's not a perfect answer but it doesn't mean that you won't have a house full of kids. It may just not be how you planned. I've been all over this world before and after the pandemic and I know that there are a lot of children out there who don't have parents for whatever reason and they would be absolutely blessed to have you and Ryan as their parents. I know this because of how well you've done with Hannah and Matty. You will be an excellent mother. Just be patient. And you need to be upfront with Ryan. He has been so accepting of everything and I don't see him not accepting this."
"I know, but…"
"Honey, no but's. He loves you. You and he were planning on waiting six months before you started talking marriage so waiting six months to start talking about babies makes sense. Just let him know what the doctor says. He has a right to know."
"Thanks, Daddy. It just hurts. I was hoping I would get out of this completely normal. Now; I may have headaches and now this? Just hurts really bad. And Daniel and Sarah get what? Three hot meals a day, medical care and shelter? It's like I am being punished and they are the ones that are the victims."
"They will never see the light of day. I don't know that they will be put to death but they will spend the rest of their lives in prison. It's not fair; I would love to be the one to put a bullet in their brains for what they've done to you. But you have a choice. You can stay a victim or you can become a survivor. You're already a survivor in my eyes but you have to start seeing that. As long as you feel like this; they have power over you. Rape is about power, not sex. So you take the power back. You rise above what happened. You've already made strides in that direction. You could have broken up with Ryan but you didn't. You want to move back to your apartment. You've let me; Ryan, Alec, Tom and Russ hug you. That in itself is a massive step. You want me to teach you the self-defense lessons. You are still talking about being a cop. You're doing good, great, in fact. And somewhere down the road, you will look back on all this as a way to help someone else. You will be out here, doing whatever and they will be stuck in prison. You will have the power then and they will be dealing with strip searches, group showers and one hour of sunlight a day. You'll win."
"Just a lot to take in. Polly and I have been talking a lot. She was raped in college and that's how she ended up with Max. She says I am still processing. I really like her. I know you think I need to talk to someone but I like talking to her. She isn't a counselor or anything but she is an ordained minister so she knows stuff. And she's had a normal life since. I think that's why I like talking to her. Everything looks hopeless now but she reminds me that I can have a normal life at some point."
"I want you to talk to someone. If Polly helps you and it doesn't bother her; then I don't see an issue. You ready to go home or do you want to find some food first?"
"No, let's go home. Maggie will have Hannah and Matty; so we can just eat there."
"Works for me."
"And, Daddy?"
"Yeah?"
"Thank you. I really love you."
"Love you too, sweetie."
The rest of the trip home was a lot lighter. They talked about Matty's birthday the next day and the sleepover that night. She had let Alec know that she was cleared to go back to work but with the suggestion that she work half days. It would be good for her to go back to some normalcy. Mike wasn't sure what he would do with himself. Alec had mentioned him working at the Sheriff's Department a couple more times and Mike was honestly considering it. Maybe something part time. He and Grace had talked about it and she was thrilled with the idea. He didn't want to complicate his relationship with her by becoming her coworker but it might also be good for them too.