CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE

Xander was standing in a bright white room, alone. "NOOO!" he screamed angrily.

"You need to be quiet," a calm female voice stated. She was wearing a golden, cotton, covering that flowed with her as she moved.

"So I'm dead now?" Xander asked arrogantly.

"No," she replied with the same calm voice. "You are waiting."

"I've never liked waiting," Xander replied. "DMV, auto repair shop. Dentist. Not big on waiting."

She smiled strangely. "You have no respect," she stated. "I have heard about that."

"Respect for what?" Xander asked angrily. "You let Faith die because of YOUR war. You screwed up and the Council had to clean up your mess. Understand this, I hate you. If God exists, he needs to hide right now."

"Come with me," the woman stated. Before Xander could object, he found himself looking down at the entire world.

"So heaven really is in the clouds?" Xander asked.

"What you see below is a ball of land and water," she stated. The view changed. Now, he could see cities. It changed again. He could see people, thousands, then hundreds, then one. "What we see is every soul, every second of every day. I am sorry you lost so much. Sometimes there are no good choices. The good of the many….."

"Never outweighs the good of one," Xander replied. "It's kind of sad that I need to teach You that."

"Over time, you will understand," she said.

"I'm not staying here," Xander replied.

"You have the power of the kingdom within you," she stated. "It was not meant for humanity."

"Then take it back," Xander replied.

"It is not clothing that you wear," she stated. "It is a part of you. There is no separating you from the power."

"Then, kill me," he replied plainly.

"No one with power of the kingdom will ever be harmed," she replied emphatically.

"I harmed one," Xander said with hate. Her face contorted in a mix of shock and sadness. "Isn't there a price for that? Don't you have rules? If you can't kill me, send me to the well."

"You are not meant for the well," she replied.

"No," he said. "I was meant to spend my life with the most amazing girl this world, ANY WORLD, has ever seen. And YOU PEOPLE let her DIE!" Blue lightning crackled from his fingertips.

"Would you harm me?" she asked.

Xander took a deep breath, allowing his animosity to fade. "I could," he said as he looked back into her eyes. "I DO NOT belong here. And if you think you can do something to make me forget her…" Tears sprung up in his eyes and poured down his cheeks.

"You cannot forget her," the woman stated. "You exist as you are now because of your memories."

"I won't stay here," he said. "I can't go back down there. You won't put me in the well. What about another dimension?"

"You are human," she replied. "We cannot banish you to another world."

"I can't go home because of this power," he said again. "And they're afraid of me anyhow. But you can't take the power back." He suddenly looked at her so intensely that she took a step back. "If you can't send me back now, can you send me back then?"

She looked at him curiously. "I will return," she replied.

i*****

"He's gone," Dawn said sadly. "He crossed God and…." Gunn gently wrapped his arm around her waist.

"God knows who he is and what he's done," he said confidently. "He wouldn't harm him."

Buffy had collapsed to her knees on the floor, crying. Angel started to approach. Dawn waved him away. "Buffy," she said softly.

"I let everything slip from my fingers," she said sadly. "I lost a sister I didn't even know I had. And now he's gone."

"I'm still here," Dawn replied, somewhat hurt by her words.

Buffy looked up at her. "I've been a horrible sister to you," she said, her tears flowing faster.

Dawn knelt down next to her. "I love you, Buffy," she said firmly. "I always have. I always will."

"What do we do now?" Buffy asked so heartbroken Dawn didn't know how to respond. She grabbed her sister and pulled her against her, holding her tight.

"We mourn our losses," Dawn said softly. "And we make the Council into what he wanted it to be."

"I don't know how," Buffy responded quietly. "He…" Her voice caught in her throat.

"You and Faith are both so stupid," Dawn replied with difficulty as tears streamed down her cheeks too.

"I loved him," Buffy stated emphatically. "I always loved him." Angel, across the room, looked down. "I was So afraid of that. But…" She looked to Dawn. "I really was happy for him and Faith. I was sad, but happy. I would NEVER have wanted anything to happen to either of them. I was happy. Does that make sense?"

"Yes," Dawn replied quickly. "I felt the same." She looked at Buffy. "He's my best friend. He's my dad. He's my everything. And this place is his LEGACY. We need to make it UNBELIEVABLE."

"I would like to make that happen," Gunn stated.

"Charles," Dawn tried to reply.

"It's okay," he said. "I understand."

"I don't," Buffy said to Dawn. "Don't mess this up."

Dawn looked back at Gunn. "I love you with every fiber of my being," she stated. His breath caught in his throat. "But Xander is in my heart too."

"I'd be disappointed if he wasn't," Gunn replied. He moved to her and wrapped his arms around her. "I love you. Dawn. And I'm So sorry. He is a great man."

i*****

Xander paced back and forth across the endless expanse. He tried to use the magic to go back, but nothing happened.

"When would you return?" the woman in gold asked as she reappeared.

Xander spun to face her. "High school," he replied. "Senior year. The day I met Faith."

"No one will know what you have done," she said. "Your Council will not exist if you do not build it."

"I get it," he said.

"Do you?" she questioned. "The Council, the one you built, is important. Your world may crumble without it."

"It's crumbling now," he said plainly.

"Only you will remember," she stated.

"The people that died?" he asked.

"They will all be in their time," she said. "However, the events of the past will continue. As I said, Only you will remember."

"So it will still happen?" he questioned apprehensively.

"Understand, this is a gift," she stated. "A ONE time gift." She looked into his eyes. "Destiny, although not real, is very often fulfilled. "

"I will fix Faith," he replied.

"You might," she stated, "but she may change so much so, she will not stay. You must be prepared for alternate reactions."

"I don't need her to love me," he replied. "I just need her alive."

"I cannot promise anything," the woman said. "What you expect, that for which you have hope, may never occur."

"I don't care," he stated. "She will have a chance at life. So will Sam and Riley and Willow and Kennedy and Tara…and Buffy."

"You will have No hold on your world," she added. "You will not be able to influence events. You will be human."

"What happens if I screw this up?" he asked.

"We will be forced to act," she replied plainly.

"You'll kill my friends," he said calmly.

"No," she replied. "Time will progress."

"Send me back," he said.

"You are certain?" she questioned. "You have a destiny…..with us."

"Heaven or Faith's happiness," he said. "And Willow's and Buffy's and Dawn's." He looked at her. "I won't mess this up."

"You may not find the life you wish," she stated.

"I don't care," he replied.

"He thought you might reply in that manner," she said. "You are meant to be here. You are meant to lead here. But it must be by your choice." She looked into his eyes. "I hope to see you again, Xander Harris."