Chapter 25: Year 324 BC
The wind had already shifted. It changed from the moisture filled northwest wind to the dry and crispy west wind subtly suggesting the beginning of a long and cold winter at this ancient Persian city of Ecbatana. It is said that the mythical King Jamshid founded the city, the King who was forever young. He was the king who could see the future on the surface of the wine filled golden cup, and the king who drunk immortality from it.
The city stood on the slope of Mount Alvand at a high elevation, about half way to the peak. It was used as a summer residence of Persian kings due to a mild and cool climate during the hot season in this area, but the place was windy all year around, and the winter was the most severe of any region of Persia with deep snow burying the city.
Hephaistion tightened his cloak around his aching body as they slowly moved up the steep hill while the strong wind whipped through the caravan. The city was supposed to be the most opulent, but it looked almost eerie to Hephaistion. Seven colorful circular walls stood one within the other getting higher by each circle like ziggurats in Babylon. The first battlements were painted in white, the second black, the third crimson, the fourth blue, the fifth red, and the last two were plated with silver and gold.
The contrasts of strong colors were almost nauseating. Even calming blue did not sooth Hephaistion's weary nerves being placed in between massive crimson and robust red. The vegetation on the terraces did not help either. If it had been spring or early summer they would have been covered with rush green and various colors of flowers to help soften the edges of the clashing bold colors, but now the autumn had arrived, the greens had turned into either dull bristles or some of them were even faded into light brown.
Hephaistion stole a glance at Alexander wondering if Alexander too felt this discomfort, but Alexander looked perfectly happy and content. Hephaistion sighed deeply and shook his head as if to shake off this sudden settlement of melancholy. He tried to convince himself that he would feel better after being rested.
Alexander did not see Hephaistion for the next few days. It was not unusual that they did not have time to meet with each other for the first couple of days after a settlement in a new place, but when Hephaistion did not make an appearance either for breakfast or dinner on the third consecutive day, Alexander started to worry. He visited Hephaistion's chamber, but its owner was nowhere to be seen.
"Where is Hephaistion?"
"Ah … he… he said that he will be back in couple of days, Sir."
The page stammered being intimidated by the king's urgent tone.
"Did he say where he was going?"
"No, Sir."
He dipped his head deeply to his chest as if it was his fault that Hephaistion did not tell him where he was going. Alexander clicked his tongue. When he was ready to call the guards to gather a search party, Hephaistion entered the room nonchalantly, and Alexander let out a relieved sigh. Although he looked paler even considering the fading tan on his skin, he did not seem to be harmed.
"What is going on?"
"You failed to show up for three days without any excuse. That is what is going on."
Alexander spat out unable to contain his feeling of relief suddenly turning into anger. Hephaistion came closer and faintly brushed with his fingertips Alexander's forearm that was tightly crossed in front of his chest. Alexander stopped him by grabbing Hephaistion's wrist, but both his grip and gaze softened when he met with Hephaistion's calming blue eyes.
"You made me worry …" Alexander's voice trailed.
"I am sorry, but I will make it up with you. And you will thank me that I had been gone."
Hephaistion smiled mysteriously.
"What do you have in your mind?"
"Can we discuss this tomorrow? I am rather tired."
Alexander nodded, and placed a chaste kiss on Hephaistion's dry lips.
"I am expecting you for breakfast in my chamber."
"Yes, my king." Hephaistion bowed deeply to him mockingly.
Next morning, Hephaistion entered Alexander's chamber as he promised. He was still a little pale, but he looked rested.
"So, are you ready to tell me of your plan of making up?"
Alexander asked eagerly before Hephaistion had even taken a seat. Hephaistion chuckled delightfully.
"You never change Alexander. "
"Come on, do tell me. I am dying to find out."
"All right, can I steal you for just one night?"
"What do you mean?"
"Can we sneak out, just the two of us for one night?"
"And you have no intention of telling me where we are going."
"No, you just have to trust me."
"When are we leaving?" All of a sudden Alexander was a little boy.
"This afternoon."
Sneaking out of the palace with Hephaistion, Alexander felt an excitement he had forgotten for a long time. However, he grew anxious after riding for about an hour.
"Is it close, Hephaistion?"
"We are about half of the way, Alexander."
"And you are still not telling me where we are going?"
"Do you remember the cave in Edessa where we were trapped during the snow storm?"
"Yes, I do remember very well." Alexander chuckled remembering the passionate night they spent when they were still in Pella.
"Well, I found a cave not too far from here. It is bigger and more beautiful."
"I do not remember how the cave looked, but you do? I must not have been distracting enough for you then."
"You have such a short memory, Alexander. I woke up first next morning shivering, since you forgot to put enough logs on the fire to keep us warm through the dawn."
"So it was now all my fault."
Hephaistion shoved Alexander's arm playfully. Alexander was enjoying every moment, it had been so long since they were alone.
Soon, they arrived at the entrance of the cave. Hephaistion took torches from the back of his mare, lit them and handed one to Alexander. After passing a short tunnel, they faced a vast area. As Hephaistion said, the cave was much bigger; a wide path led them to a wharf. Alexander stood there motionless and breathless for a moment.
The cave sealed the underground lake, sparkling stalactites decorated the ceilings of the cave, and various shapes of stalagmites stuck out of the middle of the lake in colors of red, purple, brown, green and blue. While the sight stunned Alexander immobile, Hephaistion lit candles along the wharf and the walls, and ignited the fire in the middle before putting his torch out, and taking the other away from Alexander.
"I see you have prepared."
Tearing his gaze away from the natural wonder of the cave, Alexander looked around and commented. He saw layers of fur placed in front of a generous fire along with a tray of food and wine. It was almost like slipping into the world of the Elysian field, everything looked so peaceful and beautiful illuminated by candle lights and the open fire.
Hephaistion slowly moved to Alexander at a wharf and stood beside him. They looked into the clearest pool of water, the water was so clear that even in the dim light, you could see the bottom of it. Alexander put his arm around Hephaistion's waist, and Hephaistion did the same.
"Look at that over there, it looks like two lions connected together."
Hephaistion pointed out a pinkish brown stalagmite floating in front of them.
"Yes indeed. They are you and I, two lions, standing side by side, ready to take anything."
"Or, they are you and I, two lions, making love."
Hephaistion smiled at Alexander seductively, and that was all Alexander needed to pull Hephaistion onto the warm fur bed in front of the fire. Hephaistion's bare skin felt hot against the fire. At least that was what Alexander believed.
They made feverish and passionate love repeatedly, until they both slumbered in exhaustion. Urgent calling of each other's names echoed in the cave before their ragged breath settled and total silence took over the atmosphere.
When Alexander woke up next morning, Hephaistion was not by his side. He looked around, and saw Hephaistion's discarded chiton still left on the ground. He must not have left the cave. Alexander put one of the furs around him, and stood up to look for Hephaistion.
He soon found a familiar figure wrapped in fur like him standing at the entrance of the tunnel.
"You are up early again, and this time it is not my fault. There still is enough fire going on."
Hephaistion did not answer to Alexander's tease, instead, he pointed outside and murmured.
"Look, it's snowing."
Alexander stepped up closer to Hephaistion, put his arms around his waist from behind, and rested his chin on Hephaistion's faintly trembling shoulder, and then tightened his hold. He saw big white flakes slowly dancing down from the grey sky of late October. Alexander murmured against Hephaistion's nape.
"Thank you for the night to remember….."
On the way back to the palace, Alexander was pleading with Hephaistion.
"Come on Hephaistion, it is a celebration. "
"But, I am tired."
"You can retire early, but I want you to be by my side, after all, you are my Chiliarch "
"I still am not sure whether I like that title or not." Hephaistion chuckled.
"Well then, please, my … Hephaistion?"
"Oh, I cannot make my king beg me, can I? But I can retire early?"
"Yes, I promise." Alexander grinned widely.
Hephaistion was really tired, and wanted to crawl into bed after taking a nice hot bath, but he did not have the heart to say no to Alexander's almost childish plea. And who could resist the infectious smile of the king that brightened up everything around him?
The banquet was cheerful and the mood was relaxed, as everybody knew that this was not a break between battles, but a temporary rest before going home. It was suitable for a festivity of peace, and honoring for the winners of celebration games. Wine flowed freely among the guests along with jovial jokes and conversations, yet Hephaistion sat on the couch by Alexander, somewhat detached.
The throbbing headache was getting worse after a few sips of wine, and by now, he was feeling cold sweats forming on his palms. When he was just about to tell Alexander he needed to be excused, Alexander took his arm to raise him to his feet. The colorful battlements of the city flickered in front of Hephaistion's eyes, and he felt a wave of nausea attack him, yet he hardly contained it by swallowing it down.
"Let us have a toast!" Alexander announced raising his cup. "To the winners of today's games! I am sorry that I was not there, but I had more urgent issues to attend to with this Chiliarch."
All the guests laughed cheerfully at this, and raised their cups for the toast. Hephaistion tried to raise his cup as well, but instead it fell from his trembling hand, and he too started to fall into the endless darkness. The last thing he heard was Alexander's urgent yell of his name, and the halted laughter of the guests.
Next time, when Hephaistion came around, he noticed that he was lying on the soft bed in his chamber, propped up on the cushions in the dim lights. His whole body ached, and his head still hurt. It was strange that his body was covered with sweats, yet he was freezing. He blinked a few times; as his vision adjusted, he saw Alexander's worried face hovering right above him.
"I am sorry Hephaistion, I should have let you rest. "
Alexander's voice cracked as he took Hephaistion's hand into his. Hephaistion tried to answer, but none of the words came out of his dry aching throat, he moved his head slightly from side to side to let Alexander know that it was not his fault. Yet, Alexander could not help feeling guilty for forcing Hephaistion to attend the banquet. He now remembered how pale Hephaistion had looked since yesterday, and how often he had complained that he was tired.
To Alexander's consolation, Hephaistion's condition seemed stabilized in the next few days. He still had a high fever, but the time he was conscious and coherent increased by the day. Alexander visited Hephaistion daily, spending most of his time by his side. It pained him to see his once active and strong friend submissively confined to the bed. It had been seven days since Hephaistion collapsed at the banquet.
"Alexander…"
"Yes, Hephaistion. I am here."
"You should not stay with me all the time. You have a duty as a king."
"This is the most important duty for me, to look after my Chiliarch."
"Isn't that the other way around?" Hephaistion chuckled softly. "Why don't you go to the games? It is the boys' race today. They would surely appreciate the king's appearance. You mean so much to them."
"But, I don't want to leave you."
"I will be better when you come back. We may be able to sneak out to the cave again."
Hephaistion blushed slightly, bringing a healthy glow on his pale cheeks. Alexander sighed in contentment. He actually looked better.
"All right, I will then skip the banquet tonight instead." Alexander bent over toward Hephaistion, and tried to kiss him, but he was interrupted by Hephaistion's light push on his chest.
"Will you give me a sip of water before you leave?"
"Well, of course."
Alexander reached out to the jug and poured cool water into the cup, and helped Hephaistion up.
"Thank you…"
Hephaistion whispered looking into Alexander's eyes intensely. Alexander smiled, and placed a gentle kiss onto Hephaistion's lips that were cooled and moist by water.
" I would like to sleep now, so can you please let nobody enter the room? I do not want to be disturbed."
When Alexander left, and the heavy wooden door was closed behind him, a single tear rolled off Hephaistion's eye before he whispered into the empty room.
"Farewell, my Alexander….."
When Alexander noticed the Physician Glaucus sitting at the theater, he smiled thinking Hephaistion was indeed recovering. Yet, his smile faded quickly hearing the commotion in the audience. A crying face of Hephaistion's page alarmed Alexander. He did not wait until the page reached his royal seat; instead, he leaped out of his place, and dashed back to the palace. His heart was pounding madly, and his mind was repeating the phrase; "Oh, gods, please" like a mantra.
The first thing that came to Alexander's mind was denial. He told everybody to stay away, and closed the door behind him. He crawled up onto Hephaistion's bed, and lay there wrapping his arm around the lifeless body. He told himself that if he held him long enough to give his warmth and strength, Hephaistion would come back.
When Hephaistion did not come back, the hope turned into a rage. He cursed the Persian gods for failing to protect his Hephaistion, and he blamed Hephaistion for leaving him. It should not have happened. They were supposed to go back to Babylon together, and go on to further adventure and expedition. And most importantly, they were supposed to die together.
On the third day of mourning, Alexander finally realized that his Hephaistion was gone forever. Unspeakable emptiness filled his entire body, and he could no longer stay in this place. It was too painful to breath in death while he was still alive. He shaved his head, changed into one of Hephaistion's clean chitons, and left the room.
He ordered the guards not to follow him. He roamed on horseback, but he had neither destination nor purpose in his mind, his gaze was fixed on the ground at all times. He just needed to get away. He did not know how long he was riding, but he raised his gaze for the first time when his horse halted. He realized that he had come in front of the entrance of the cave.
Alexander dismounted, and approached the opening. A torch they had used just ten days ago was still sitting there. Alexander lit it up, and went through the dark tunnel. He lit the candles and the open fire just like Hephaistion had done when they visited here for the first time. He heard his own whisper, "the night to remember." His lips trembled.
Alexander moved to the edge of the wharf, and put his fingers into the clear pool. Overwhelming emotion clenched his heart and he cried uncontrollably. He felt Hephaistion; he actually felt Hephaistion's spirit slowly seep into him from his fingertips traveling through the purest pool of water, a true reflection of Hephaistion's soul. It reserved a spring of life in Alexander's body.
And at that very moment, he realized that this was Hephaistion's last gift. He did not give him only the night to remember, but also the strength to move on. Yet, somewhere deep in his heart, Alexander knew that the spring would dry out, and soon, he would follow Hephaistion.
When Alexander looked up, the twin lion came into his sight. Alexander promised Hephaistion with watery eyes.
"I will have them carve a statue of twin lions for us, and I will leave it here as a monument of our love."
End
A/N: Some of the sources say that 'The Lion of Hamadan' is 'Parthian monument', but I used it here as 'Hephaisiton's monument'.