This is the very last stanza from Elizabeth Barret-Browning's "The Lady's Yes"
Sorry about the wait, these ending chapters are so difficult.
Thanks so much to everyone who continues to read and review!
By your truth she shall be true--
Ever true, as wives of yore--
And her yes, once said to you,
SHALL be yes for evermore.
Chapter 25
Maybe this wasn't such a good idea, I thought to myself after quickly descending from Mount Olympus and to look for the legendary earth entrance to Hades. The last time I went down there I had an invitation, I thought wryly. Maybe this time the earth didn't want me back squirming around in its bowels, and for that matter, maybe its ruler didn't want me back there either. I wavered dangerously between doubt and conviction, going backwards or forwards, as I navigated the landscape, which had suddenly changed from field to forest. Funny, I thought, I don't think this was here the last time I looked up.
It was rumored that there was an entrance to the Underworld above what would be the south end of Hades' kingdom, could you see it above ground. So I left Olympus in a spot that would take me much closer than the place I normally left from to return home. I walked for about fifteen minutes, absorbed completely in my own thoughts and worries, when suddenly it happened. The scene shifted; I guessed that was the trick, in order to find it, you couldn't be looking for it.
A grove of poplar trees circled around me, silhouetted black, eliminating all detail against the dusty night sky. The ground below my feet was oddly comfortable, flat earth that gave gently when stepped upon, covered in impossibly thin strands of grass, rather than blades. I took my shoes off, grateful that the slap of my sandals against my feet was gone. I squinted, fighting the dimness of the forest, but it was no use, in every direction the forest looked endlessly the same even, to my mild horror, the direction I just came from. It was as if the door to the outside world had closed behind me and now there was nothing but a wall of eerie black bony poplars.
I'll admit I was spooked, but the dense quiet and the lack of any distinguishing features that might indicate an entrance left me to ruminate over my decision. I had time, while I was aimlessly searching, to decide if I should have waited, or if I did find the entrance, how to find Hades and then (if I ever got that far,) what to do when I did. Would he want to see me? Was he still angry about the wedding? It was unnerving to walk into a situation that's so important and have no idea what the other person even feels to begin with. Like walking into battle not knowing if you should bring your sword or your firmest handshake, you could either come out with an ally or a spear lodged firmly in your gut.
Another fifteen minutes passed. Or I guessed it was fifteen minutes, there was no real way to tell here: the light remained the same, each set of trees looked like the last and the one before that. Despair was setting in. Now the quiet wasn't peaceful, it was tense and anxious, waiting for something to suddenly spring out. Panic rang out in my head as the minutes ticked by, alerting me that something should have happened by now. How did the heroes find their way down, dumb luck? I knew Hades hated visitors just as much as he hated people leaving the Underworld when they weren't supposed to. I gulped down the knot of fear that worked itself up in my throat. By this time my most of my hair had fallen loose from the pins that held it earlier, and the long webby fabric of my dress got tangled in my feet every few paces, making my steps erratic and off balance. A twig snapped. I jumped and turned to look behind me. There was nothing there that I could see. Another snap. I jumped again, but noticed that it was coming from above instead of behind me. I stopped dead, because when I turned back around I was facing the largest elm tree I had ever seen.
It stood alone in the grove of poplars, ash gray towering above a sea of black. Its leaves were the same ash color as the trunk and branches, and they rustled and cracked softly in a breeze that I couldn't feel down at the roots. I looked harder at the leaves of the mighty elm; they weren't the normal shape for an elm tree, instead of the uniform serrated oval, each was different. I gasped as I realized that most of them weren't shaped like leaves at all. Washed gray, I saw a flat miniature palace, then one shaped like a chariot, another like a tiny fields of grain. Almost every imaginable human symbol or object seemed to cling somewhere among the somber branches, all the way up to the upper most limb. This sparked my memory, I had seen this somewhere before, though not so vividly, had it been a dream? No. I had seen a scaled down ink illustration of this very tree on the map of the Underworld in Hades' library. This was the tree of False Dreams. A small shudder of relief escaped my lips because I knew I was in the outer regions of the Underworld. I had gotten the first part right. But I quickly sucked the gasp right back in when I remembered who and what else lurked in these woods. Thanatos was rumored to live here, but I saw that he spent much of his time in the palace assisting Hades. But Thanatos would have been the least of my worries; the Atlas of the Underworld also said that this was the residence of Fear, Hunger, Agony, the Erinyes, Harpies, the Hydra, Gorgons, and Chimeras among other things.
As each one was rattled off the list in my mind, terror pulsed faster through my veins. I doubted they would recognize their queen, and even if they did, it probably wouldn't matter especially not if Hades was in fact, still angry.
Spurred on by sharp panic, I dropped my sandals and sprinted around the great elm, pushing my legs to run faster than they ever have before, fueled on by wave after wave of adrenaline. All I could hear was the muffled pounding of my steps and my thundering heartbeat. I whipped my head back after checking that no one or nothing had noticed me here, but running at full tilt caused my hair fly all the way around and over my eyes. Partially blinded and pointlessly struggling to move my hair to get a better view of the dark, I tripped and was sent hurtling toward the ground. A sick shock rippled through my stomach when I didn't hit solid ground after a second or two as one normally does when they trip, instead I was still falling.
I had unwittingly fallen into what looked to be a giant snake hole with circular, rough earthen walls, and a bottom made of nothing but darkness. And rocks, as I was soon to discover when I crashed down on the craggy hill, and tumbled downward, too disoriented to grab anything to break my fall.
All I could see was inky blackness and the occasional flash of silvery fabric from my dress, mashed together into a dizzy whirlwind that wouldn't stop as I fell end over end down the rocky bottom. My bones jarred painfully with each landing and I could feel instant bruising flowering around my hips, knees and elbows. Just when I thought I might never stop tumbling, I smashed headlong into a wall that gave when I crashed into it and finally broke my fall.
I winced as I tried to sit up and figure out which direction was up. Groaning, I clapped my hands over my ears, trying to stop the piercing ringing sound that had erupted in my head. Another groan. I froze, did that fall knock me senseless or did I really hear that, because I knew I didn't make that second noise. Squinting through the dark, I cautiously placed my hands on the rocky floor to stand up. But it wasn't cold stone under my fingertips; it was fabric. My eyes flew wide open, trying in vain to capture more light. My other hand shot up to my mouth as I moved up the refined cloth. I stood. The cloth stood. Holding my breath, eyes still blind; I moved my hand further up. Behind the cloth was solid and strong, I felt the smooth contours and lines underneath. Up a little higher I inched, fingertips scarcely grazing the fabric as it shifted to skin. Rounded throat, Adams apple, tendons pulled taut as my hand roamed higher. I reached my other hand up, placing them on either side of a graceful jaw. My hands were trembling, I knew these lines as well as my own.
Yellow sparked light flared up from previously unseen torches along the cavernous earth walls, flooding my eyes and making them sting. In the bright white flash before they adjusted, my eyes stole a single frame of him. My memory and dreams had failed miserably at recreating his alarming beauty. In that still frame I saw the sharp grey eyes that had captivated me and drawn me in from the start. They were still looking down at the hands I had been too startled to take down from his magnificent face. I sucked air rapidly back into my lungs and threw my arms back down to my sides; Hades was standing right in front of me and he had broken my fall.
He reached up and touched the place where my hands had been. I struggled for breath; suddenly there wasn't enough air in the cavern we were standing in. "H-Hades, I was just…I didn't know…how…" I faltered spectacularly. I kicked a few stray rocks around, staring hard at the ground, and tried again, "I was coming to see you."
"I know." Was all he said. I smirked in spite of myself, "Apparently I was the only one who didn't know I was coming here tonight.
"What?" he asked.
"So that's what that sounds like from the other side…I was beginning to think I would be the only person to sound confused around here."
"Persephone, what do you mean you didn't know you were coming here?" he asked again, "It is the appointed time."
"Um, No one told me about the six month change of scenery. I had to force it out of them. They even had a party. What kind of perverse logic is that? Oh well, I'm over that, I'm here now…"
But Hades wasn't listening. His fists were balled tightly at his sides, each one engulfed in angry black flames. His eyes seethed upwards and I was grateful that there was plenty of earth between him and the heavens, because otherwise I think someone would have received a very nasty scorch mark on the backside from the sheer hatred in his glare. "Hades…" I ventured. The flames around his fists expanded violently up to his forearms. "How dare they…" was all I could understand from the rapid string of words that barely escaped alive through his clenched teeth.
Swallowing the fear in my throat, I took a step toward him and reached into the black flames. His hand was ice cold as I brought it up to my lips and kissed his unclenched palm. His piercing stare shot down to my face, eyes wide, flames still shooting from his hands. Aside from our collision, this was the first real contact we had had since our wedding day. Wave after wave of memory flooded my brain as my lips met his marble skin. I lifted my head and our eyes collided.
He exhaled with a shudder and held my hand with both of his, black flames engulfing our clasped hands. Then he dropped them suddenly, the fire extinguished.
Stricken, I asked, "Am I too late?"
"Too late? You're early." He said frowning.
"I meant am I too late for you. When I left, did I ruin what we had? It would kill me to hear you say yes, I've missed you more than I thought anyone could miss anything."
He looked at me like I had told him I was running away to start my own sheep farm. That is, very confused. "I was worried that you wouldn't want to come back at all. I had convinced myself that you would refuse to come down after your six months were up. I certainly didn't think I would run into you here." He said.
I grinned, "What can I say? As soon as I heard about the bargain Zeus and company made, I hurried down. Although," I hesitated, "I almost turned back a few times because I thought you might not want me here."
"Don't ever say that." A dark look stormed over his flawless features. "There will never be a time when I don't want you here. With me." He ran his hand through his black hair and sighed heavily, "Persephone, that day…I never meant it to be such a disaster, you deser—."
I threw my arms around his neck and interrupted his sentence with a kiss. He caught on a second later and I felt his strong arms wrap tightly around my waist. After a moment, my feet were no longer touching the ground. His lips clung to mine and I knew he longed for me every bit as much as I wanted him. Between ragged breaths, in pauses where our lips where somehow not touching, I whispered his name. He answered by tightening his iron hold on me.
"This can't be real," I murmured.
"Why not?" he paused, keeping his face inches from mine. The closeness of his staggering beauty made me suddenly dizzy and I forgot what my argument was.
"You want it to be real, don't you?" he prompted again, with the barest hint of a smile in his voice.
"Yes, yes." I said quickly. He kissed me until I ran out of breath. "But I've wished for this so many times, how do I know it isn't just someone taking pity on a poor broken-hearted girl by making me hallucinate to see what I want?" I said, half serious.
Hades placed a gentle kiss on my temple and asked, "Is there anything I can do to prove that you're really here with me?"
I considered, "You'd have to say something that my brain would definitely not come up with. Something I know I couldn't make up."
His sober eyes lit up as a sly grin tipped the corners of his mouth, "I don't know what I could say, but if you'll follow me down, I could show you some things you'd never come up with in any of your dreams…" His hand crept slowly up my back to rest at the side of my neck where my jaw meets my throat.
"I don't know…I think you're not giving my imagination enough credit." I pretended not to be phased by his touch.
"Oh I don't doubt you," he said, tracing my bottom lip with his thumb, "but at least let me try…" he finished in a whisper that made my stomach do some very inventive gymnastics.
Eyes closed, I tried to protest one last time, "If this were real, we'd be talking about everything that happened these past months…"
But Hades had already moved on to my neck, and I could feel every word he said brush against my skin, "We'll talk later. After all, we have all night and I've missed you."
"That's exactly what I hoped you would say," I sighed as he took my hand and started down the path to the Underworld.
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